Chapter 5

In the Berry men car to the reception, Santana had somehow persuaded a nervous looking Rachel to take over driving responsibilities. The brunette diva had begged Santana to be careful and not to crash the vehicle with the Latina reminding Rachel that she wouldn't purposing total the car and kill herself just to piss her off. Kurt's step brother also tagged along for the ride, sitting in the back seat with his ex girlfriend. Making the current conversation rather awkward for both brothers.

"So how's operation 'smoke Puck's pole' coming along, lady lips?" Santana asked as she fixed her hair in the rear view mirror and completely ignoring the road, much to Rachel's charging. Finn seemed to choke on his own saliva at the question and looked at Kurt in horror. Since the pale countertenor was in the passenger seat in front, he was able to pretend not to notice the look out of the corner of his eye.

"Couple hits, couple misses. A curve ball has been thrown in once or twice but Miss devil in red, I must say, I'm optimistic for a home run." Kurt informed as he gently grabbed Santana's chin and guided her head back to the road.

"You know baseball?" Finn asked in bewilderment.

"With a father like mine and a brother like you, you tend to pick up on things that have no intellectual value in the real world." Kurt turned his head and smiled at his brother sweetly. Finn frown in further confusion and Rachel was trying, and failing, to suppress a giggle.

"Kurt you shouldn't do it!" Finn randomly blurted out once the pale boy had turned back to the front. "I'm not gonna pretend I know exactly what you're planning but I know it involves Puck and sex." 3 years ago, the blush that Kurt saw on Finn's face when he turned back around would have been adorable. Actually it still was, but in a completely platonic way. "Your not like this. Throwing yourself around like you don't matter. New York has changed you. Both of you." he said in a sad voice, looking between Kurt and Rachel, both having the decency to look rather guilty. "Blaine's still single, if you want-that- that badly, go after him. Leave Puck alone." he actually sounded pretty damn serious and full of authority. What he hell was his problem?

And then, like a bludger to the brain, it clicked.

Kurt groaned and fell back into his seat (he was doing that a lot today, his poor, poor Vera Wang suit from the vaults of Vogue was going to be ruined) and decided to ignore the argument that was now going on between Finn and Santana.

Finn Hudson was and always would be the awkwardly tall leader, with a face of dopey innocence who was slightly homophobic. He wasn't he kind of ignorant that would bully Kurt because of his sexuality or even discriminate against him (anymore) but he was the kind that assumed that the 'gay kid was out to convert the straight kid'. It had happened with Finn itself (OK, maybe the crush got a little out of hand and Kurt had indeed tried to make Finn fall in love with him) in sophomore year which ended in a homophobic verbal attack. It had happen in Junior year when Kurt wanted to duet with Sam, which was complete unnecessary due to the fact that; yes Kurt fancied Sam, but he had genuinely believed Sam to be gay at first and when he found out he wasn't, he simply wanted to sing a song. Finn barked out some shit about predatory gays who don't understand the word 'no' and Kurt was once again reminded of the tall leaders narrow and uneducated mind. Even with Blaine, before Finn even met him, he spoke to him on the phone to make sure he was 100% homo. And now, he was doing it again. But Kurt wouldn't argue with his brother, mainly because, Finn was right. Puck was straight and Kurt was trying to sleep with him. But Puck was releasing some pretty hot pheromones of his own, right? Kurt wasn't imagining it? Living in a fantasy like he had done with Finn way back in the day?

"Listen up Fetus Face, Pillsbury Dough Turd, if you are implying that me and my girl Hummel here are predator molesters for getting our wanky on with a couple of breeders, Imma climb over into that back seat and go all Lima Heights on your ass." Santana threaten as she spun around in her seat, causing Rachel to scream and for Kurt to lean over and take control of the steering wheel.

"Wait, what? You too? Who are you trying to hook up with?" Finn asked, looking completely lost.

"Quinn, duh! And let me tell you how its gone be, if I may, we are not gonna pounce of them and rape them. We are gonna wait and oh, it will happen, until Lady Fabray and Puckerman are begging for it." She promised confidently as she turned around and took in her surroundings. "We're here" she smirked and shut off the engine.

As everyone climbed out of the car, Finn, to no surprise at all, pulled Kurt aside as the girls went on to greet the others who had already arrived.

"Please little brother, don't do this." Finn begged in a hush tone as he looked down on Kurt in a disapproving manner. "You're letting Santana manipulate you."

Kurt gaped up at him, "I have my own mind Finn." he snapped and placed a hand on his cocked hip. "It's just one night of fun. I'll be back in New York in 48 hours, I'm not going to fall in love with him and follow him to the end of the world." giving Finn one last distasteful look, Kurt turned on his heels and sashayed his way over to the group, and Puck in particular. "Hey." he said cheerfully as he came to a stand still right in front of the man.

"Hummel." Puck acknowledge coldly before turning away to join a conversation Tina and Blaine were having.

WHAT THE FUCK!

"Let's get a drink." Quinn suggested after 20 minutes on the dance floor. Santana couldn't have agreed more, especially because Brittany and Sam were dancing way too close to them. Quinn grabbed hold of Santana's hand in hers and pulled her towards the bar. "We all should have known that a Valentines wedding was just asking for disaster."

"Love stinks." Santana groaned as they reached the bar and saw yet another carrot top as the bar man.

"Sorry ladies, can I see some ID?" the fire crotch asked, he didn't sound very sorry at all.

Whatever, it didn't bother Santana, who pulled out the fake ID she had been using since sophomore year when Puck had given it to her on her 16th birthday. "I'm 25, name's Rosario Cruz. I might be related to Penelope, you?" she asked Quinn, who flashed her ID at the bar man.

"Emily Stark, barely legal." she droned on in a bored voice and when the ginger man began pouring them drinks, they both turned to look over at the rest of the guests.

"Well, that's good, because I hear your professors are into that." Santana teased, knowing full well about Quinn's previous relationship with a Yale professor in his mid 30's. They turned around to pick up their large glasses of wine from the bar. Let the fun begin. "You know, we always were two ends of the same bitch goddess spectrum. Maybe that's why we love each other so much. And slap each other." Santana said playfully as she took a large gulp of her white wine. Quinn mirror her actions, drinking far much more than what should she usually would, Santana observed subtly.

"You know, I have to say, Rosario you are killing it in that dress." Quinn complimented, looking slightly tipsy already as she placed her pale hand on Santana's arm and let it linger there for a couple seconds more than what could be deemed platonic.

"Thanks." Santana smiled and turned to watch how Kurt was doing, safe in the comfort of knowing that she herself was on a roll. Her partner in crime however, had his back turned to Puckerman and sat on a chair with a pout on his face. Santana rolled her eyes and turned to see Brittany and Sam dancing lovingly in the corner. "Look at those romantic saps. You know, they might have love but do you know what we are that they aren't?" Santana asked as she turned to Quinn, who was leaning against the bar looking completely relaxed.

"Flawless." and indeed they were, and they clicked their glassed together before demanding another round from the carrot.
Realizing she was well on her way to getting into Quinn's panties, Santana dug out her phone and began scanning through years worth of photos. After about 40 seconds, she found one decent enough. A photo of Puck just after he came out of juvie in junior year, posing, completely naked with nothing more then his hands cupping his dignity. Santana had taken it after one of their hot anger sex sessions and the camera could pick up on the sweat beads that glistened Puck's hard, toned body. His face wore the usual 'just got laid' smirk and his eyes were alive with mischief. All in all, it was a pretty hot picture if Santana was still into that thing. But alas, she wasn't. But someone else was. So without thinking twice, she clicked send.

It took 1 minute for Kurt to dig out his phone in a grump, 20 second after that for his face to flush red and his mouth to drop open, 5 seconds after that for Kurt to stupidly drop his phone in shock, 7 seconds after that for Puck to curiously pick up the phone and look at the image that had startled the boy and 5 more second for Puck to realize who sent the image and to turn to Santana with a smirk on his face and throw her a wink.

Don't worry Hummel, Auntie Snix would never leave you behind.

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