Chapter Thirteen
If You're Here, Does That Mean . . . .
"Okay, Yuki, let's go to school," chirped Iroha, thrusting the bento into the child's hands once the little girl had shrugged her backpack over her shoulders. She paused, confused, and looked at Iroha with questioning eyes. She'd thought it odd that Iroha hadn't left for work at her usual time, of course, but Rin was the one who walked her to school.
"Rin?" Yuki didn't bother formulating a full sentence.
Iroha's smile grew tenser as she replied, "I'll walk you to school today, okay? Rin won't be able to take you to school in the mornings anymore, so I'm going to bring you myself, okay?"
Yuki frowned a little, slightly annoyed by Iroha's patronizing tone. She didn't have to sugarcoat it. Why didn't she just say straight out that Rin didn't want to walk her to school and she'd given up trying to convince her?
In any case, Yuki exited the apartment without another word. She was earlier than usual today, it seemed. She'd have a good half hour before school started if she left now. She considered telling Iroha this, but, judging by the way the woman had been rushing her all morning, Iroha still had to get to work as fast as possible, and Yuki felt bad enough about making Iroha go in late.
Yuki nearly let out a shriek as she felt arms wrap around her stomach and a chin drop onto her shoulder, stopping herself just in time as a voice she recognized immediately said, "Hey, Yuki. What're you doing here?"
Yuki nearly let out a sigh of relief upon recognizing who it was. She grinned broadly and wondered, "What are you doing here, Neru?"
The golden-haired girl released her friend and spun her around with a sharp jerk. Neru was more awake in the morning than Yuki expected. From what Haku recounted in their earlier days, Yuki had always imagined Neru as being the farthest thing from a morning person as possible. "Lily and I stayed over with Piko and Miss Utatane last night. What about you?"
Yuki laughed, instantly encouraged by Neru's energy, and pointed toward the door to Rin's apartment. "I live here."
Neru's eyes widened in shock and she whipped around to exclaim, "Piko, you idiot! Why didn't you tell me you lived in the same apartment as Yuki? We could've come over and visited afterschool!"
Yuki's heart skipped a beat as she glanced around Neru to see Piko, Lily, and Miki standing in the hallway, slowly approaching. Neru must have run ahead of them upon seeing Yuki. The quieter girl opened her mouth to say something to Piko, colour slowly flowing to her cheeks when she realized that she had no idea what to say. He grinned broadly at her, seeming to have forgotten yesterday already, and greeted, "G'morning, Yuki. Wanna walk to school with us?"
Yuki looked to Iroha, wanting to say yes but deciding to check in first. Iroha wasn't looking at her, though, and a deep scowl had carved itself onto her face. Her yellow eyes stared evenly at Miki, who stared back with a gaze that was simultaneously soft and firm. Yuki hesitantly wondered, "Mama?"
Iroha didn't have a chance to answer, though, and Yuki barely had time to let out a squeal of shock when she felt herself being lifted into the air. She squeaked when she felt herself fall a little, but then she felt herself grow sturdy against someone's shoulders. As she looked down, startled, on blonde hair, she thought first of Len. Then, a voice came.
"We're going together, actually," Rin said, only a slight trace of coldness in her voice. "Yuki, Iroha, and I. I'm sure you'll be fine without us."
"You suck," snapped Neru, glaring up at Rin with flashing yellow eyes.
"Move it, twerp," Rin growled in response, probably trying to scare the child, but Neru was much too strong to be frightened by Rin's harsh words.
"I wanna walk with Yuki!" Neru argued, scowling viciously as she continued glaring up at Rin. Yuki wanted to laugh at how little Neru looked from up on Rin's shoulders, but she was still too stunned. Len had done this all the time, but Yuki couldn't remember Rin ever making so much contact with her before.
"Well that's too bad," retorted Rin. Yuki squealed a little as she felt Rin move, reaching her hands to grip tightly to the fabric of Rin's shirt. "C'mon, Iroha."
Yuki couldn't see Miki as the woman spoke, but she could feel the tension rising in Rin's shoulders. "You know, I could walk Yuki to school in the mornings. It's really no trouble."
Rin didn't turn, so Yuki craned her head around to look for Miki's reaction as Rin stated, "That won't be needed. She's my daughter, not yours."
Yuki paused, no longer registering her teacher's reaction. Had she heard Rin properly? Her daughter? A smile lit Yuki's face, and her heart started doing little flips. She tried to tell herself not to think too much of it, not to get her hopes up, but she couldn't help it.
"Geez, how much do you weigh, Yuki?" questioned Rin, shifting Yuki around to try to get her into a more comfortable position. Yuki felt that joy fade for a moment as redness flooded her cheeks.
"S-seventy-eight apples," she hurriedly replied. Actually, she weighed as much as eighty-six apples, but Piko was listening. It was too embarrassing to say how much she weighed in front of him.
"What kind of screwed up weighing is that?" scoffed Rin as she began to walk down the stairs. Yuki tightening her grip on Rin, imagining what would happen if Rin tripped. Colour fled immediately from her face. "Where in the world did you get seventy-eight apples?"
"C-careful," Yuki stuttered as the horrific images continued racing through her head.
"Rin, what the hell do you think you're doing?" exclaimed Iroha. Yuki craned her head around once more to watch the woman run toward them, stopping uncertainly when she approached Rin. The blonde woman stopped and stared at her, tilting her head gently to the side so as to prevent Yuki from falling.
"We're going to school," remarked Rin casually.
"What's with the sudden personality shift?" questioned Iroha, seeming a little flustered and frustrated. Yuki couldn't blame her. Honestly, a part of her was expecting Rin to just suddenly drop her, but she clung to the hope that, maybe, just maybe, the Rin that Len had loved still existed. "Just yesterday, you were—"
"Miku came by when you were out yesterday."
Yuki froze, her stomach dropping as dizziness settled in. So the woman who'd gone to Piko's really had been Miku, then. She really might be taken away.
"And then Kiyoteru dropped by," she added, causing thoughts of Miku to vanish for the moment. Yuki recognized the name of Len's father. She gazed curiously at Rin, but she couldn't see the woman's face properly from this angle, so she had no idea what Rin was thinking. The thought of whether or not Rin would be able to keep holding her up absently tickled the back of Yuki's mind, but she knew now wasn't the time to mention it.
"I called him," Iroha supplied after a moment of silence, "and asked him to come see you."
"We talked," Rin went on, beginning to walk once more. Yuki was still incredibly worried that her weight was too much for Rin to handle; she was nine years old, after all. It couldn't have been normal for a parent to carry a nine-year-old like that. "He helped me sort through some stuff, and he went to talk to Miku."
It was silent for a little longer. "And?"
Rin stared forward for a moment before stating, "If Len could see me right now, he'd be crying, and not in joy after finally seeing me again. He'd be sad. He wouldn't be in love with this version of me."
"If he can't love you past your faults, he doesn't deserve you." Yuki wasn't sure if the trace of bitterness in Iroha's voice was just a figment of her imagination or not.
Yuki couldn't help but ask now, "Rin, can I come down? I don't want to fall."
Yuki was rather sure that Rin and Iroha had forgotten she was there because they both fell absolutely silent as Rin paused in her walking. Then, she stooped down and allowed Yuki to clamber onto the safety of the ground. Yuki wondered immediately if she'd been wrong to do so. After all, Rin had been trying to be nice, hadn't she? Had Yuki just walked all over that kind deed?
"I-I'm sorry," Yuki stammered quickly, bowing slightly. "It's just that I was worried that you might not be able to carry me or something, and I didn't want you to hurt yourself, so I just figured . . . ."
She stopped when Rin placed a hand on her head, giving her a little pat. "Calm down, kid. It's fine, alright?"
"R-really?" Yuki wondered, filled with remorse now. What if Rin was actually offended? Yuki should have thought before she'd spoken.
"Come on, you two," beckoned Iroha, who had walked ahead but stopped now to look back at them. "It's going to look bad if the others beat us there."
Yuki looked up at Rin, who smiled hesitantly. She cast a huge grin in return, unable to believe the change in Rin. A part of her still warned her to be careful, but how could she worry when she'd finally made progress with Rin? She was certain that this side of Rin was the one Len had known, the one he had loved. She'd help Rin, to make it up to Len.
After all, it was still her fault that he was dead.
. . .
"Yuki's mom sucks," Neru told Haku during the lunch period. Yuki looked up from the lunch Piko was busy stealing from to gaze curiously at Neru. "She wouldn't let Yuki walk to school with Piko and I."
"You three were going to walk to school together?" Haku wondered, tears filling her red eyes as gloom settled upon her once more. She was a total crybaby who was set off by the tiniest things, Yuki had come to acknowledge. "What about me?"
"Oh, shut up, you crybaby," snapped Neru, sniping an octopus sausage from Yuki's bento as she did. Yuki considered protesting, but it had become natural for Piko and Neru to dig through her bento. They shared theirs, too, so at least it was a fair trade, though she'd rather have been eating the bento of Rin's leftovers from last night, instead. "You weren't there. Lily and Miss Utatane just happened to be together yesterday, and Piko and Yuki live in the same building."
Haku's sullen gaze fell to the table as she whispered, "I still would've liked to have been invited. I had to come to school all alone."
"Well, we didn't end up walking together, so just shut up," groaned Neru, scowling deeply at she gave up on snatching a particularly slippery sausage and speared it through with her chopsticks. Yuki cringed at the inappropriate use of cutlery but resisted the urge to stop, feeling that to be too impolite.
"Yuki," called Miss Utatane. Yuki perked up and tossed her gaze over to the teacher, who beckoned her forth. Yuki quickly excused herself from the table and rushed over to the teacher, turning her inquisitive gaze up to the redhead.
"Yes, Miss Utatane?" she wondered.
"Miss Akita was wondering if you could help her out," the teacher said. "Once you're finished lunch, do you think you could go see her?"
Yuki blinked, not quite understanding. "Why me?"
Miki smiled kindly and said, "You just have a natural charisma, Yuki, that she thought might help her out."
Yuki still didn't understand what Miki meant, but she nodded all the same before returning to her table to find Haku struggling to fend off Neru and Piko as they dug through the abandoned lunch.