A/N: Thanks to .315 and Person for reviewing! We've hit 3,000 viewers!

*Chapter inspired by Everlark-forever12

Disclaimer: Not in a millon years, not in a thousand years, not in a hundred years, not even in a year, will I own The Hunger Games.

Dear Effie,

Damn that hair of yours. Just damn. What's wrong with the hair you were when you were born? And, and your skin tone! What are you a ghost! Haven't you heard of a tanning salon! Your lips, they're huge! Your eyelashes, they're as long as a hyena's tail! The dresses your wear, they're awful! It's like your a clown! Then, oh then your heels! What did your feet ever do to you! And yet you can still run in them! Then we have your hats. Your hats, your hats, your hats! Your hats are the worst part of it all! Your as ugly as a monkeys butt, while it's pooping. You can fake it all you want, but I know your just a shallow, hideous, dimwit. If I had a nickel for every time you looked hideous, I would be the richest victor alive! Hell, I'd be richer than President Snow! Stay ugly Effie!

From a Hater, Haymitch

A/N: Sorry I don't ship them Haymitch and Effie. SLEEPOVER HEAVAN HERE I COME! Review :)