A/N: Heeeey, so since I have no letter request I get to make up my own tonight! *gasp :O*. Ok thanks to Clato4eva88 and .315 for reviewing! BTW WE'VE HIT 4,000 VIEWS! Only 1,000 views away from a 1,000 word long letter!
*Chapter inspired by my dad
Disclaimer: smeh.
Dear Beer Bottle,
You, you sexy bottle. I could just suck you up right now. But, I am a gentleman, so I'll respect you. Now I may be drunk, but I am sure that you are one of the prettiest beer bottles I have ever seen! Oh no, Katniss is here! She's gonna try to take you away! She can't take such a beautiful thing away from me! There I knocked Katniss unconscious with another bottle, now it's just you and me again. I could never let anyone take you away from me. I love you too much. With your sweet taste, and your delicate bottle form, y-y-your perfect! Crap, now Peeta is here. He's gonna start yelling at me for knocking out Katniss, WHAT TO DO! WHAT TO DO! I know! I'll knock him out too! Stay here baby, I'll protect you. Ok were good. I better hide you before one of them wakes up. But… they know all my hiding spots. Baby, I love you, and the only way to protect you is to drink you. Please forgive me. Maybe you can find some other beer in my stomach, and fall in love with that. No matter how drunk I am, I will always love you.
Love Haymitch
A/N: OMG LOL! Reviews, please this letter deserves some reviews!