Disclaimer: I own nothing...

A/N: SURPRISE UPDATE ATTACK! Did you expect this? ;) I hope you enjoy and THANK YOU for the amazing response!

Song: Bastille – Oblivion... It goes perfectly with this chapter and the last but, has been a constant source of inspiration throughout writing this story and will, I hope, be a constant inspiration for me.

Beauty and the Beast – Chapter Sixteen

Daring himself, Christian slowly began looking up. His heart suddenly burst in his chest, galloping, palpitating away. He had to look at her. He had to see what she had become. He had to torture himself and know he was just too late. He near enough felt himself die again at the sight before him.

Ana wasn't dead. She was far from it.

There hunched on a spot on the floor, alone, was Ana. Her body jumping and shuddering with her silent sobs. The scalpel fallen to the floor only mere feet away from her body. She hadn't gone through with it and as much as the heavenly angels wanted to open up and start singing, Christian didn't know if his mind was grieving too heavily already and was tricking him into seeing her alive.

He was scared to blink in case the sight before him would be one of her laying on the floor, her throat slit after her every intention was to do so. He was terrified to do that but, when neither Taylor nor Sawyer dragged him from the room he knew the sight was all too real.

His angel was alone and crying out heavily before him and he was wondering if his eyes were toying with him.

He had to be with her! He had to show her that she was not alone.

Without any other thoughts, he crawled towards her on his hands and knees, not caring how ridiculous he looked. The moment he could, he carefully placed his hands on her arms, mindful of her wounds, and unravelled her body.

The face that looked at him, as beautiful and wounded as it was, looked marred with even more grief but, most of all, the regret her large blue eyes were highlighted with was heart wrenching. The tears that were coursing down her face were just spiked with remorse and shame and he just couldn't believe that she was still here with him, breathing.

"You're alive?" He asked her in utter disbelief as if this were a mirage. A beautiful hallucination brought on by bereavement. She nodded slowly and again she allowed herself to mourn her prior actions. She broke down and cried because of every single pain she was suffering and to top that all she was disappointed in herself for going to such an extreme length.

"I'm so sorry," Ana sobbed against Christian's chest, her hands reached up to claw at his shirt and grip onto them as if he were the one to redeem her for her preceding sin. "I'm so sorry, Christian. S-so sor-sorry. I-i tho-thought I-I was do-doing th-the rig-right thi-thing."

"Shh," Christian calmed her, "I can't believe you went that far and I would do anything to stop you doing that again. I would even cut my own face to show you that I don't care. I just don't care." He cupped her face, his fingers on the left splaying out around her deep gash on her cheek. "I would do that. I would be scarred for the rest of my life for you, Ana. Do you not see that?"

Ana just flared her nostril, her body and mind in the middle of a break down and as Christian's eyes became hooded with his wounded feeling she only sunk deeper.

"How could you be so stupid to try that?" Christian asked her. It was now his turn to speak. "How could you fucking think I would be happy with you doing that?" He asked her and he wanted to shake her and waken her up to the truths around her. "Do I look like a happy man who just thought the love of his life had killed herself in front of his eyes?"

"No," Ana whispered back, her eyes stuck staring at his.

"It's because I'm not Ana!" He exclaimed at her, his anger breaking his control barrier. "I'm not happy right now and I won't be happy until you are. I want you to see what I see when I look at you. I don't see a monster; I don't see a fucking beast. I see the woman I love. I only ever saw the woman I loved. I don't see what that monster did to you. I see passed these." He told her and turned her head slightly to survey the wound to her face.

Ana closed her eyes as he did so and she was scared that even his words wouldn't stop his true feelings from flying free. She felt his hand loosen as he ran his hand up her face and she did let herself cry a little more.

"They don't make you, who you are," Christian whispered and as he turned her head back to him she allowed her eyes to open again. "They don't make you my Ana. You make my Ana." He watched the tears crystallise along the lids of her eyes, "How could I ever not love you?"

"I'm damaged," she tearfully cried at him, her eyes crying because she felt beyond repairable right now. All she wanted was to be fixed. "I feel I don't deserve love anymore, Christian. Look at you and look at me," she tried to convey her point.

"I have my own scars," he reminded her, giving a small, mirthful smile to try and ease her mind. "Each and everyone you love as if they were beautiful."

"They are," Ana rested her hand to his chest, staring at his chest as if she could see through his clothes and at his bare skin. "They're the most beautiful part of you, Christian. They exude strength and everything you've been through. My survivor," she breathed out the final sentence. Looking up at him, she saw the way he was staring at her. She sounded like a hypocrite after that. "Yours aren't like mine."

"No, they're more rewarding of courage and bravery," Christian praised her immensely.

Ana snorted, "I tried to kill myself. How can you say that to me? I tried to take a cowards way out and you're praising me. I'm a weakling, Christian."

"No, you're a woman who is living in the aftermaths of an inhumane attack. You are dealing with so much and it's still fresh. You are not supposed to be feeling amazing and like everything is going to be okay. You're allowed to break down. You're allowed to be weak in the face of this right now."

Taking in a heavy inhalation, Ana was terrified of the future. Not for her scars but, of Christian's opinion of her. "I didn't want to disappoint you."

"And you haven't. I'll admit I have never been that scared to lose you but, you needed saving. I plan to do that when you feel alone and can't cope. I am always going to be here, Ana. I mean every word I tell you. I won't lie to you. You know how I feel about liars. Lying is for cowards. You were desperate to make everything right."

"What about what you said earlier to Taylor and Luke," she hiccupped as she sat remembering his words. "It sounded like you were talking about me."

Christian couldn't resist the laugh he released, "Kaitlyn is back for real." He saw Ana look at him in horror and he could see the conspiracy piece together that she was the most likely of candidate who had something about Ana and Christian. "She contacted me and I want her out of my life now. I want her locked away and gone for good. I want to end her," Christian bit the last few words with unbelievable amounts of anger and putrid hate.

"Oh," was all Ana could say and her depressive state just claimed her more. How could she have been so stupid? The man she was in love with loved her just the same amount. There was no denying that now. It was those thoughts that spurred her to ask him a heartfelt question. "Can you really love me?" Ana whispered her plea, beseeching for truths wherever she could find them.

Reaching up, Christian took the white gauze covering her cheek and let it drop to the side. He placed a hand to the side of her face, his fingers edging around the wound. "I will always love you, Ana. There's nothing not to love. Those scars are beautiful because they are a part of you." He let his tears run free, not caring for them right now, "I know it's going to be hard for you to get over this but, I will be with you every step of the way. It's you I love. I love you for you, not for what you look like." He was repeating his words from earlier like a well constructed manipulative eulogy but, he had to give her his heart however many times necessary.

"I'm scared you'll wake up one day and see you are actually only loving a beast," Ana spoke lowly of herself but, with the scars on her face she knew she was ugly.

"You'll only ever be my beauty," he told her and gave her a smile. "The beast here is the doubt you're feeling. You'll always be my beautiful Ana if you keep smiling. Baby, your laughter has brightened my life and just having someone like you want me has made me see that there is more to life than physicality." He could see he was only cracking the surface of the problems that now sat between them but, he would do this for as long as necessary. "You gave me my heart remember?" Christian told her and smiled at her.

Ana just bobbed her head up and down at him.

"I want to grow old with you, Anastasia. I don't care about anything but, you. I want to see if you every morning for the rest of my life. I want my first hello to be yours and I want my last goodnight to be to you. No one else has made me feel like that and no one will ever do that to me. You mesmerise me, you beguile me, you love me."

"Me too," she agreed to his every whim and word and cried again. "I feel the same, Christian. I re-really do."

"Good," he told her and using his hand on her right side, he pulled her in and for the first time he committed to the first kiss they had shared since this happened. He didn't just fuel the kiss with the need to shut her and her new insecurities up. He kissed her with the passion and lust of a man that had lost everything and was willing to kiss death to bring them back.

As he pulled away he knew he had to get her some medical help. She wasn't strong enough for this anyway and yet she had escaped watchful eyes and tried her body with burning through so much adrenaline. However, Ana near enough curled into his lap and held him close to her body.

Christian was aware of the door opening but, he didn't tear his attention from Ana.

"What's going on in here?" She whispered to Taylor after seeing Christian and Ana on the floor, bodies now melded as one.

Taylor gave a sympathetic smile before he spoke, "Ana tried to kill herself." He whispered it so not to reawaken what Christian had just calmed down. "We seriously thought she was going to do it."

Grace felt her own grief bubble up in her, and she felt her eyes water. "H-how?"

"Scalpel," Taylor muttered and he heard Grace gasp knowing she had seen the partially blooded scalpel on the floor. "She was pressing it to her neck but, apparently seeing Christian break down stopped her."

"I'm going to go and get a blanket to cover Ana in and get someone ready to tidy this room up," Grace fled the room before she could break down entirely. The moment she was out of the room, she stood with her back flush against the wall and just cried out. She knew Ana wasn't coping she never expected it to get to this point.

Taking a cleansing breath in deep to her lungs, Grace wiped her eyes and went in search of a blanket.

Going back into the room she found Christian was literally cradling Ana who had cut her crying short of sobbing and was just seeking solace from his touch. The moment Christian looked up at her with terrified eyes; she went over entirely to the pair.

Grace wrapped a blanket around Ana and allowed Christian stood up and scoop her up into his arms. He didn't start the journey back to Ana's room until she rested her head to his shoulder, her arms looped around his neck for support.

As they neared her hospital room he felt her grip tighten on his clothes again, her body tensing up and he tried his all to calm her back down.

He knew she was terrified of the repercussions that were going to be waiting for her.

After all, you don't try to commit suicide and go on your merry way.

She felt like she was becoming Anastasia Steele, the clinically insane.

If she was a danger to herself, what else was she capable of?