Chapter 4: Pioneering Research
A/N: Accidentally rather angsty. Perhaps writing Succession temporarily drained all my comedy potential!
Richard felt like he was being watched. He looked up from his book, expecting to find Harry regarding at him since he was normally the responsible party. Instead, Danielle stared up at him solemnly.
"Good morning," he tried.
"Can I have some juice, please?"
She'd spoken, oh Sweet Lord she'd spoken. Of course one key thing Richard had learnt from his nocturnal studies was that he should not overreact to this development, and continue to act as if Danielle hadn't spent the last 24 hours silent. If he made too big a deal of it, she could react by returning to silence. So he schooled his features before responding.
"Sure, let's see," he opened his fridge and pulled out two cartons. "I have mango or pineapple, which would you like?"
Danielle appeared to take this question very seriously, screwing up her face in concentration before eventually replying, "Can I have them mixed together?"
That really didn't sound appealing to Richard, but hey he didn't have to drink it, "I don't see why not." He prepared the juice as requested. "Would you like something to eat as well?"
"Banana sandwich, please," she said, as she accepted the juice from him.
Two thoughts came to mind, the first was that Danielle had been instilled with very good manners. The second was why the hell would anyone eat a banana sandwich?
He might as well try to be honest, "I've never made a banana sandwich before."
"You've never made a banana sandwich!" she cried out with the sort of incredulity that can only be achieved by a child who has yet to realise how big the world is. It was really rather endearing. He shook his head to confirm the fact. She sighed at him dramatically, "I can make one but you have to help me use the knife."
"Ok, sounds like a plan." He retrieved bananas and bread, which he assumed would be the constituent ingredients. Since she couldn't reach the counter, he stood her on a chair carefully and relieved to find her balance seemed fine. He peeled a banana and put two slices of bread down.
"We need more," she told him firmly. "One for you and one for Camille and one for Harry." She removed three more bananas. Richard glanced over his shoulder to see Camille was still fast asleep, that woman was proving able to sleep through anything.
"Harry doesn't eat banana sandwiches," he explained.
"But you said you've never made a banana sandwich!" Her tone was accusatory, and for a moment he felt guilty for no apparent reason.
"I haven't."
"So that means he's never had a banana sandwich, so you don't know if he likes them or not!"
Her logic was irrefutable, that was for sure, "Ok then, you and I shall do some pioneering research into whether lizards like banana sandwiches or not."
Her face screwed up again, and he realised she had no clue what he'd just said, "You know, an experiment."
"What's an experiment?"
"A test designed to prove or disprove a hypothesis," What the hell was wrong with him? What four year old knew what a hypothesis was? He shook himself mentally, and tried again whilst Danielle began peeling the bananas.
"Right so, say you have a question like 'does Harry like banana sandwiches?' what is the answer to that question?"
"You don't know!" Danielle provided the answer he'd been hoping for.
"Exactly! So an experiment is when you do something that will let you answer that question. So we'll offer Harry a banana sandwich and see if he eats it," he waited to see if his explanation had been good enough. Her only response was, "Ok!" so he just had to assume she'd understood him.
"Now we have to slice up the bananas," she instructed him. Richard retrieved the bluntest knife he owned from the draw and held Danielle's hand as she began to gingerly cut the bananas into slices.
"Can people come back from the dead?" she asked in a dramatic change in conversation.
"No, I'm afraid they can't."
"Have people done experiments?"
He guessed his explanation had been understood after all, "Lots but they all agreed that people can't come back."
She kept chopping for a few moments, before adding, "Jesus came back."
Richard wasn't quite sure where to go with that, and settled with, "He wasn't a human though. People can't come back, I'm sorry."
She was done with her chopping, and laid slices of bread side by side before beginning the meticulous arrangement of banana slices, "If people could come back, do you think my Mum would?"
He really should have gotten a general book of dealing with grieving children, the psychological reviews generally assumed people knew what to say. Part of him wished Camille would wake up, but the other half was oddly determined to prove he could deal with.
"I'm sure she would Danielle," he reassured her. At least he thought it was reassuring, until she looked at him in alarm and asked, "But isn't she happy? With Granny?"
"She…she is. But she would want to come back because she would want to make sure you are ok."
"Can I be dead then?" She asked, as if it was the natural solution. He took her hand to stop the arrangement of banana slices and turned her towards him.
"Why would you want to be dead?" He asked her, aghast.
"Because when you are dead you get to go to heaven, where you are happy, and I can see Mummy and Granny," there she went with her logic again, floored logic to Richard but perfectly true to her child's mind.
He let out a long breath, really just to give him time to form an answer, "Well, your Mum and your Granny wouldn't want you to be dead Danielle because, because, um, there are things you can do when you're alive that you can't in heaven and your mum would want you to do them."
"What sort of things?"
He cast his mind about, and seeing the sea out of the window impulsively said, "Swimming."
"Swimming?"
"No swimming in Heaven, they are all floating around on clouds in the sky aren't they!"
She seemed willing to accept that hastily made argument, "What else?"
"Growing up. Your Mum would want you to grow up, and then you can get married. And maybe have your own children. Can't do any of that in Heaven."
"We need sugar," she told him, which was not the response he expected.
"What?"
"You sprinkle sugar on top of the banana slices, silly!"
"Okay," he dug out a small pot from the cupboard and she used a teaspoon to sprinkle it over before applying another slice of bread on top.
"I guess I won't be dead then for now," she said, and he felt a rush of relief. He had not wanted to explain to the child psychologist that one night with him and left his charge suicidal.
He popped her down from the chair whilst she held onto a plate with her sandwich. When he turned around he was surprised to find Camille sitting up in bed, knees pulled to her chest. He found it strange she hadn't said anything, and had to wonder how much she had heard. Danielle clambered up onto the bed next to her and began to eat. He really didn't like the idea of crumbs in his bed, but resisted the urge to comment.
"Banana sandwich?" he offered Camille nervously.
She gave him the sort of smile that had a tendency to make his stomach flip, and took it off him, "Why not."
He supposed he might as well try his own sandwich, he liked bananas and bread so a combination of the two couldn't be that terrible. He got the shock of his life when he did turn back to the counter though.
Turned out lizards did like banana sandwiches.