Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.
Beta'd by HollettLA.
"Riders on the Storm"
Chapter Three: Kylie
When I saw Katie and Raul enter the restaurant, my stomach tied in knots. I didn't make a big deal out of it, but Gio was coming tonight. He sent me a text, asking if it was all right.
Before anything, we used to be best friends. I figured it would be no problem.
Now, I wasn't so sure.
"Aunt Mary, how are you?" Joe left his arm draped around my waist and leaned forward to kiss his aunt's cheek.
His aunt Mary looked to me. "Such a beauty." She pinched my cheek.
I giggled, grasping her forearms. "Thank you so much for coming." My beaming smile was beginning to hurt my face.
"You'll be blessing us with a little one soon?" She patted my belly.
"God willing." Joe sipped his drink, and then kissed my hair.
My smile fell briefly, but I was fast to conjure it again. "Have a good time tonight." I squeezed her hand before she walked off. "How many more do we have to stand here for?" My mother told us to stand and greet people as they came in.
"I don't know, but I gotta few calls to make." Joe looked at his watch, making a face. "You used that shampoo?"
"Lavender," I said.
"I don't like it." He lifted his phone to his ear.
I went to grab it away. "Tonight, really? Can't you not . . .?" I asked, gesturing to his rudeness.
He kissed my cheek. "It's the beginning of football season."
"Right." I blew out a breath, knowing he's trying to get his bookie business started. I have no idea how it works. Sonny gave it to him when Joe joined his crew. I don't really know how that works either.
"Hello, hello!" Katie greeted, grabbing me away from Joe.
Genuinely, I laughed and embraced her. "Wow!" I stared down at her stomach. "Look at you!" The last time I saw her, she was hardly showing. Now she was all belly.
She puffed her cheeks and waved a hand. "I'm a parade float."
"No," I said, stomping my foot. "You look gorgeous." I turned to Raul. "And how are you?"
He nodded. "I'm great, Kylie. And you?"
I smiled, nodding too. "I'm . . . I'm just—I'm good."
Katie stared to the side of me and then directly at me. "You don't have to go through with this," she whispered through clenched teeth.
"Not you, too." I bitched in a low tone and turned to Joe. Thankfully, he was on his cell phone.
"You're not even nineteen," she scolded. "Your mother, Alex, and I had lunch the other day, and we think—"
"You're not my mother," I sang.
I love Katie as if she was my own sister. We get along better than I do with my cousins, Hanna and Carli.
Katie, Alex, and my aunt Lizzie are my only allies and best girl buds. Mom and I used to be so close, but . . . And Lizzie moved so far away.
Katie, since she was a kid, has always felt she has to be everyone's mother—mothering and smothering is what she does best. No, she loves best and sticks her nose where it doesn't belong, much like my own mother.
Katie sighed. "I'm still shocked—was shocked when I got the invite in the mail. I called Bella right away." She craned her neck to look around. "Your mother is a miracle worker. She pulled this all off so quickly."
"Ahh," I sighed. "My parents work fast." I shrugged. "Joe and I were going to fly out to Vegas this weekend—"
"Do it before you lost your nerve?" She made a face.
"No!" Pregnant or not, I pinched her arm. "They wanted us to get married here. And my dad tossed around some money . . . It all came together."
"Your mom's been running ragged."
My eyes landed on my mother then. She was receiving people too—wearing the same watered-down smile I'd had earlier. "She's been great." I looked down to the Jimmy Choo's I stole from her closet. They pinch my toes, but matched this dress, and I wanted to look the part tonight.
I needed to fit in—in a world where I never truly have—because I was about to embrace it.
"I'm not surprised they're late." We turned to see Sonny and Damion greeting my parents. "They're late to everything."
"Your brother is looking fine," Katie whispered.
Shockingly, she wasn't looking at Sonny. She was staring at Damion, who rocked the gray Armani suit he wore. His hair was a mess of copper, and his stance—just the way he stood and looked—reminded me of the old photographs of my father. "Mom says Julie broke up with him."
"No!" Katie gasped. "Did he get the ring back?"
"Nope . . . He told her to keep it—"
"Is he crazy?" she shouted, gaining odd glances from those around us. "That rock was—" She stopped to lower her voice. "It was like twenty grand." Her face fell as she studied her modest engagement ring and wedding band.
I did the same, having no idea how much mine cost. It's a one carat solitaire, and Joe promised to get me a bigger one when money was better. "It's not about the ring," I said.
She grinned, dejectedly grasping Raul's hand. He was busy talking to my cousin, Emmett Jr. "You're so right . . . he's the love of my life."
"Of your life?" Her answer saddened me. "Like your whole life?" Maybe I just didn't get it. "You loved—love Raul and that's it? He trumps everyone?" I always wanted her and Sonny to get back together. The baby put a damper in that plan—doubt my brother would be man enough to overlook the fact that she's having someone else's kid, not that she'd leave Raul . . .
The baby just seemed so final—the last nail in the coffin or something.
She opened her mouth, pausing, and letting go of Raul's hand. He didn't seem to mind or notice. "I—uh—I'm sorry. What'd you wanna know? Pregnancy brain." She tapped her forehead.
"It makes you stupid?"
She slapped my arm. "Bitch."
"Well, does it?" I asked, rubbing my bicep. "Geez."
"Oh . . . you're serious," she laughed. "I thought you were—never mind." Katie stepped closer. "Don't do this."
"Katie," I groaned.
"Listen to me…do not do this. Don't marry Joe. I remember when he dated Carli, and-"
"What?" What she said was news to me. I had no idea Joe and Carli dated.
"It was casual, nothing special, but he was a total dick."
"If it was a one-time thing..." I didn't know what to say, or how I felt about it.
"It was last year." She waved a hand. "There's a million reasons why you shouldn't. And, trust me, Carli isn't one of them."
"Well, what happened between them?" I stood, expectant.
"They had sex. It meant nothing to him, but it did to her. They dated...they finally slept together, and then he never called her again. That's not my point, though," she whispered.
I rubbed my stomach, a nervous wreck. "Carli never said anything to me. I had no idea."
"Because she probably doesn't care." There was still something she wasn't telling me.
I narrowed my eyes at her, trying to read between the lines because you always have to with these people. There's more to what they don't say. "Do you have second thoughts about…?" I tilted my head toward her husband. "Is that why you're..." I gestured for her to continue. "Are your worries for me...Are they really about you and Sonny?"
She rolled her eyes. "No."
"Katie...?"
She huffed a breath, rubbing her own stomach. "I asked Sonny to give me a reason—a reason why I shouldn't marry Raul, and he wished me the best." She shrugged. "What the fuck was I supposed to do with that?" Katie looked away. She stared at Sonny, who was talking to my father and uncles. "I just wish I could stay away from him," she mumbled.
"What?" When Dad made eye contact with me, I looked to my shoes.
"Lucky for you, my brother doesn't have the emotional capacity of a teenager—even if you're both eighteen. You get what I'm saying? Hear Peto out, just promise me that." She squeezed my hand.
"Sonny does not have—"
"No . . . he's—he thought I'd be happier and bowed out because he was a coward."
"No way," I laughed. Sonny's the bravest person I know, although he's annoying and can be a total pig. He's got so many different sides to him, but overall he's wonderful and caring. He had my back when my parents found out about Joe and me. Sonny let me crash on his sofa for a couple days, too.
I ran away to be with Joe, and Joe brought me to Sonny's apartment instead—said it wasn't right and that I couldn't stay with him. My brother sat Joe down for a talk. I fell asleep, and two days later Joe asked me to marry him. It was something out of a book or a dream. We went to dinner. We had dessert, and he got down on one knee . . . It—he made me forget about Gio.
By now we were both staring at Sonny, and again—when Damion caught my gaze, I averted it. "You still nervous?" she asked.
"Um…yeah, I guess so."
"Good." She winked, linking her arm to Raul's.
Everyone thought Katie and Sonny were going to get married. They were together all throughout high school and the beginning of freshmen year of college. Alas, my brother fucked it up. He stayed here in New York, going to our father's alma mater, NYU, and Katie was accepted to Brown. The long distance put a strain on them. My brother was tired of sharing the weekends he had with her with her parents and siblings. He threw a bitch fit and basically gave her an ultimatum—saying she either had to transfer to a school closer, or they were going to break up.
She shocked the shit out of him when she chose to part ways. She told me once a couple of years ago why she made that decision. Katie and Sonny were each other's security blankets. Each other was all they knew—all they wanted to know. And with the way she was raised, by Aro, no one was going to tell Katie what to do.
If I think about it now, that's kind of how Gio and I were—security blankets—only we parted because of much different circumstances.
When Katie started teaching at a public school in Manhattan a couple of years ago, she met Raul, and they've been together since. He teaches math or something, and she teaches social studies.
"Babe, I gotta take this call." Joe left me and I watched him leave the restaurant. He held the door open for Carli, who had a cigarette hanging from her mouth. My instincts told me to follow him, but...
"Bye," I whispered, talking to myself and looking around for Gio.
Me? My story hasn't ended. I don't know how it will end, but I know how it started.
It all began when we were fourteen. My goofy best friend and I had matching braces—blue caps because they were so cool. And my brother Damion teased us one day. He said our teeth would get stuck together when we kissed.
And I had always wondered what it might be like to kiss Gio.
We chalked it up to curiosity.
On a hot summer day, behind my father's shed in our backyard, Gio kissed me and I surprised him by sticking my tongue in his mouth. My mom caught us and shooed us back to the pool. The rest of the day was awkward, and we blushed every time our eyes landed on each other.
For some odd reason—I don't remember why—we didn't talk for almost a week.
When high school started, I thought I had lost my best friend. Then I made a lot of other friends. I had a newfound appreciation for and curiosity about the opposite sex, and the boys of Bishop Ford High School had an appreciation for me, too, apparently.
Gio was always so soft-spoken. I always took the lead and got him in trouble. And I'll never forget that day when he changed . . . It was the third day of school, and I was talking to . . . I don't even remember. It was some boy in our class. Gio became angry and pushed the guy away from me. He stole my hand and pulled me toward him, and I was so confused until he told me that I was his girlfriend.
Over the moon, I didn't question it. I wanted to have more kisses behind the shed, around school, and wherever we could.
And we did . . .
We had to stop studying together because we never got any studying done.
Our fathers were always out evenings and late afternoons. My mom and Gio's stepmom, Lisa—who's technically my aunt, although I hardly know her—always gave us some freedom. Our doors had to stay open, but they never bothered us.
While our dads were around, we couldn't get away with anything.
I still can't, yet Aro has lightened up a lot since Gio turned sixteen.
In fact, I lost my virginity in Gio's room when we were almost seventeen. I had already spoken to my mom. My mother used to be like my human diary. She knew all my secrets, and we never had that regular mother/daughter relationship, I guess. We were friends and she never betrayed my trust, or told my father anything.
She took me to the doctor for birth control and cried but said I was mature for coming to her. Meanwhile, it wasn't a big deal. I used to tell her everything. And she never told me not to have sex with Gio. She just wanted me to think about it long and hard before we did it. When she wanted to sit us both down and have a chat about the birds and the bees, that's when it got weird, and I begged her not to. Gio already knew a lot more about sex than I did, even though we were both virgins. The three of us talking would have also been the most embarrassing thing ever.
I had thought—fantasized—about it every day for about a year prior. Everyone was having sex, yet my decision never stemmed from peer pressure.
And when it happened . . .
I didn't think about it at all. It just happened. We got carried away, and before I knew it we were naked, and Gio stopped. He wanted to make sure it was okay.
With a slight nod from me, we made love for the first time. It hurt like hell, and I remember crying after. He was so sweet. Being a computer nerd, he had previously googled some stuff. When we were through, he brought me Advil and gave me sweat pants and said the sweetest things.
Most of all, he told me that he was going to marry me one day, and I was never happier.
When we started senior year, things kind of changed. Gio had a growth spurt over the summer. I remember thinking he grew overnight because he was suddenly so tall. We had long since gotten rid of our braces. And he actually started looking like a man.
He became popular when school started, and his father made him join the football team—get out from behind a computer screen. My mother thought his involvement was cool, too, and tried to get me to join the cheerleading squad. Dad saved me from that—mainly, the short skirt and pom-poms. But I never missed a game, and I certainly never missed all the girls' eyes.
Senior prom, I went with the hottest guy in school—Gio. I wore one of my mother's old gowns—one I had admired all my life and used to try on when she'd leave the house. I had never had the boobs for it, but I finally did that night. I felt so sexy, and yet like a princess in that dark blue, strapless ball gown.
Mom and Dad also gave me my wings that night. They said I could come home in the morning. It was my night, but I noticed Joe—the guy my father assigned to drive and follow us around. I didn't have true freedom; however, it was a lot more slack than I had ever had before.
Gio was named Prom King, and Heather Paccini was named Queen.
I remember watching them dance from the sidelines—the disco ball creating a million small lights while it twirled in the darkness. It wasn't that big a deal, but the fact that Gio's eyes never left mine was.
I couldn't wait to get out of there. AJ rented us a hotel room that we had to keep secret, but I mostly wanted to get Gio away from Heather. She was always so horrible to me—made fun of the way I dressed outside of school, told everyone my father was in the mafia, had the kids call me Kylie Soprano. I was popular in my own right. Everyone knew who I was, and my real friends never judged me or believed her words about my family. Gio used to tell her to shut the fuck up any time she said anything bad.
But she was also the queen of Gio's crowd senior year. I was invited to certain parties because he was. We never went—weren't really allowed to. No one understood our families or lifestyles but each other.
When the song ended, she kissed him, and I froze—thought I was going to vomit right on the spot, and then ran out of the hall. Gio ran after me, and Heather ran after him. She said some horrible things. Gio told her to shut up, kept trying to grab for me when I kept backing away, and then Heather dropped a bomb.
She said she was sorry I had to find out this way—on prom night—that she and Gio had been sleeping together.
Hurt and confused, I sought Joe. I wanted to get out of there.
He was coolly leaning back, smoking a cigarette by the car. I took off for it, nearly stumbling in my heels. Gio caught me before I fell, telling me it wasn't true. Then Joe intervened, told Gio to step back and get his hands off me.
Gio did.
I got in the car and cried the whole way home, only I didn't want to go home. I had Joe drive around for a while. He was a great listener. He gave me some advice, too. He basically said "boys will be boys" and "it happens" and that "it was probably just sex with no meaning". Apparently, when "good girls" like me don't put out, a boy will seek it elsewhere.
Only . . .
I had put out.
And I wanted to hurt Gio just like he hurt me.
What Joe said made sense. I grew up with Sonny and Damion. I knew how guys were. Damion is tamer because of Julie, but Sonny can't say no, and Damion says it takes a strong guy to—because men are idiots.
He told me to always remember that—men are stupid.
Moaning like some slut, but dying on the inside, I had sex with Joe in the backseat of his car that night.
He didn't even notice that I was crying the whole time.
Three days later at graduation, I gave Gio the condom wrapper—said we were even. He wore a blank face, and then he laughed—told me to stop picking up trash off of Sonny's floor.
But I was persistent, urging him to believe me.
His face paled. He called me a whore, pushed past me, and left the school. He left in such a hurry without his parents. And I stood in the hall, stunned.
Ten minutes later, a sobbing mess, I ran out to the car. Joe—who was really my father's driver at the time—let me into the car. He told me I was too beautiful to be crying all the time and handed me a tissue.
After that night, I never saw Gio again. We never crossed paths over the summer. He left for Texas—college—last month without me, which was around the same time I accepted Joe's ring.
"Earth to Kylie!" My mother waved her hand in front of my face.
I smiled, swallowing thickly. "Sorry . . . too much champagne." Lost in thought, I practically guzzled a glass and was currently on my fourth.
My mother took the flute away from me. "Water from now on. We have a big day tomorrow." She gave me that same fake smile.
And it took everything not to cry—cry to Mommy and ask her how I could get out of this.
I know it's hard to believe, but Joe and I have only had sex twice. Once we came out with our relationship, my father had a sneaky way of always being around. He mentioned something about Joe "courting" me, and how if I liked him, I was to go about it the right way—his way—and even my mother couldn't stop him. We had dates, and I had a curfew, and Vito—my new driver—followed me everywhere. We couldn't do anything.
In my father's eyes, Gio was Peto, a boy who was practically his son, but Joe was a man—a creature far too dangerous for me to be alone with until we were married.
Cue the sarcasm.
"Baby?" She palmed my cheek. "You okay?"
I gritted my teeth and pulled away from the touch that threatened to break me. "I'm fine. Stop asking me that." My heart was already broken, and being mean to her—when I never dared to before—was so easy now. None of it mattered anyway. Joe is my one-way ticket away from her, my father—that house—basically anything that would remind me of Gio.
Mom stiffened, squaring her shoulders. "Have you said hello to your future in-laws?" She raised a brow.
"Of course. They're really nice. I don't know why you don't like them."
"I just don't . . . I never liked Marissa," she laughed. "I'm allowed—Hi! So glad you could make it." She nodded, waving to some people I didn't know. "That's Luke and his wife, Elena," she whispered in my ear. "Smile."
After they embraced my mother, Luke and Elena came over to hug and kiss my cheek, congratulate me, and I still had no idea who they were—Elena looked vaguely familiar, though. I bet she attends those purse parties my mother throws.
When they left, I turned to Mom. "Head of the Jersey family," she whispered.
"Oh . . ." I blinked. "Wow. Why are they here?"
"Out of respect for your father." Mom sipped her wine. "I bet they give you a nice, thick envelope tomorrow."
"Nice." I plastered a grin on my face.
"Have you eaten?" She pinched my belly fat.
"Stop . . . I'm not hungry," I whispered. "Squeezy wedding gown tomorrow, remember?"
She nodded. "Well, try to eat something. The night before my wedding," she giggled, "Oh my gosh . . . I don't remember if I ate or not." She snorted. "But your father surprised me—"
"Are you drunk?" I bumped my hip to hers.
"Not yet, getting there, though." She kissed my cheek and then smeared her lipstick away. "I'll always be on your side, baby girl. You just have to tell me which one."
"Huh?" I raised a brow.
"No matter what you decide to do or don't do . . . Your father and I will always be behind you." She stopped to hold her chest. Then she waved at her face before she started to cry.
"Mom . . ."
"Ignore me. I'm just—Kylie, you're so young."
I groaned. "I'm not doing this now."
She didn't let me get away. She pulled me into her side and leaned into my ear. "You want what your father and I have, and you're going about it wrong. Without passion, you have nothing. If you have to think and talk yourself into going down that aisle . . . if you have to think long or hard about anything, it's wrong. You have to do—do what your heart says." She let me go.
"Mrs. Cullen," Joe greeted her again as he eased behind me.
I frowned, looking down to my shoes again and getting comfortable within his embrace.
"Joseph." Mom smiled. "Excited?"
He nodded, finishing off my glass of bubbly. "You know it." When Mom walked away from us, Joe composed his smile.
"What?" I asked.
He shook his head. "Nothing, babe . . . What time is this over?"
I shrugged, gazing out to the party guests. When my eyes landed on Sonny and Damion, they were staring at us. Ignoring them, I just stood there while Joe sent a text message. "Do you really want to marry me?"
"Kylie, don't start—"
"I'm serious," I whispered.
"I love you—"
"But are you in love with me?" I asked, staring up at him.
He grinned. "My feet are toasty warm. I'll be at that altar tomorrow—don't worry." He nipped my lips.
I pulled away fast, smelling and tasting something odd. "You were gone for a while . . ." I was standing lost in thought, drinking champagne for more than a half-hour.
He shrugged. "I had that phone call."
"What'd you eat?" I touched my lips, leaning in because I caught a whiff of perfume, too.
"Nothing. I haven't eaten yet."
"You were with Carli," I said.
"Whoa . . . absolutely not." He gripped my arm. "Don't cause a scene or throw one of your tantrums, got it?"
I pulled my arm away. "Were you?"
"I was on the phone. Go ask those who are still out there." He pointed to the exit.
"Okay. Whatever," I muttered.
"Hi, how ya doin'?" He gave a one-armed hug to my cousin Jasper, who leaned back to smile at us.
"You guys . . . you look great."
I nodded, smiling at my cousin Alice. "How are you?"
"Amazing. I still can't believe you're getting married." She did a little dance, and then hopped up to hug Joe. "God…I feel ancient. And he's so handsome!" She was so excited, she placed kisses along his cheek, and then Jasper pulled her away.
"My wife's been going drink for drink with your mother." Jasper winked.
I laughed, wishing they lived closer. "Did Annie come?" I looked around them.
"No. She, Ricky, and Jacob couldn't get off of work. They'll definitely be here tomorrow." Jasper nodded.
"Great!" I punched the air.
Alice leaned into me. "Tell Joe to go wash up. He smells like pussy," she spoke behind her hand. "You animals. So in love you can't keep your hands off him, huh?"
"What?" I asked.
"Huh?" Jasper asked. No one heard Alice but me.
"Young love." Alice stared at Joe and then to me. "Gah!" Her eyes widened. "So exciting!"
"Yeah," I sighed, studying Joe's stoic face.
"Well, we should catch up later." Jasper ushered her away.
I turned to Joe. "Um—"
His phone rang and he held up a finger.
I fluffed my hair and snatched another glass of champagne off a passing tray. Then I tried to recall the taste of Joe's kiss—the scent of his lips, and I became nauseous. I gulped my drink back, hoping it would wash out my mouth, as tears filled my eyes.
"Whoa . . . you okay?"
"No," I turned, answering Gio. He looked amazing, wearing a suit and standing tall. His short, dark hair was perfectly spiked and his onyx gaze paralyzed me. I couldn't talk or move, only stare. The tears stopped, too, and I was stuck.
"Wow." He eyed me from head-to-toe. "You look . . . you look." He nodded, chuckling awkwardly as his cheeks turned a rosy red. "You look gorgeous."
"Giovanni." I felt Joe stand behind me and place his arm around my waist.
Gio stood at his full height. "Joe . . ." He briefly looked away. "Congratulations." He fiddled with his watch.
"Thanks for coming, man." Joe slapped his hand to Gio's. "Glad we could put past problems to bed. I know Kylie appreciates it." He spoke of me like I wasn't here.
"Do you, Ky?" Gio asked.
A moment passed and then Joe poked my cheek. "Yes," I finally said. "Th-thank you for coming." My eyes were pleading now, wanting so badly to run away, just so I'd have a second to think—process what had happened five minutes before and just . . . Gio.
When Joe's phone rang again, I nearly jumped out of my skin. "Don't answer that." There was a knot in my stomach, and I suddenly couldn't catch my breath.
Joe gave me a look and took the call.
Gio leaned into me, smiling. "Kylie—"
Nervously grinning back, I whispered, "Get me out of here."
He nodded and held out his hand.
And when I took it . . .
When I held his large, warm hand, which engulfed mine with ease, it felt as though an electrical current ran through my arm. With no words to anyone, I silently followed Gio outside. Looking back, everyone was drinking, eating, and talking—and Joe had his back to us.
"Go!" I became even more anxious and pushed Gio the rest of the way out of the restaurant.
He pulled me into him, placing his arm over my shoulder.
And I was home, actually home, a place I missed so much.
The past few months, I'd been at home, but I'd been thinking "I wish I was home", and I'd never known what that meant.
Now, I did.
Gio had always been a part of me—since I was born—and he'd been gone.
"What's going on? Did he do something?" He pointed to the restaurant.
"No . . . yes. I don't know. Where's your car?" I spluttered.
He shook his head, placing his hands in his pockets. "I came with Katie—"
"But she got here like over an hour ago," I said.
He shrugged. "I was—I was out here. I didn't know if I'd be able to say what I have to."
It was hard to swallow as I stepped toward him. "What's that?"
He turned his head, staring up the street. "Well, when I walked in and saw you and him, I was going to say congratulations. You looked happy—I don't know."
"Oh." My shoulders slumped, but then something clicked. Amongst all my thoughts and with everything that had just happened, I had a random thought. I understood something that Miss Smarty-Pants Katie couldn't or wouldn't.
Sonny was never a coward. He did the noble thing—because if Katie was happy with Raul, who the fuck was Sonny to swoop in and make her sad? Fuck up what she had? Maybe it was wrong. Maybe Katie wanted my brother and Sonny just didn't know, which would then make Katie just as wrong as Sonny? After all, she did walk down that aisle and say "I do" and stuff.
"I don't want to make you unhappy. I just—"
Uncle Carlisle left the restaurant with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. Knowing they travel in packs, I ducked into a neighboring doorway.
"What?" Gio followed me.
I shook my head.
"Shit," he laughed, stepping up to stand next to me. We had our backs pressed to a door to the apartments above the restaurant. "Our dads' are out here now." He hooked his pinky with mine.
My breath caught and I didn't dare move my hand. "So . . . how's Texas?"
He sucked his teeth. "Texas? Come on."
"Well . . ."
"Well, it sucks without you." He took hold of my whole hand.
I grinned into my shoulder, as I peeked to see our fathers still outside. But then I frowned. "We got each other good, huh?"
"What?" He sounded confused.
"Heather . . . Joe, graduation," I whispered.
"I never slept with Heather."
I stiffened. "But—Gio, you can tell the truth. I'm over it," I said.
"Look at me—"
"No." I didn't want to, or maybe I just couldn't.
"I never slept with her. She wanted to break us up, and I couldn't believe she did. Us." He squeezed my hand.
"Me neither."
"You're my best friend, Ky." I felt him step closer, if that was possible.
I squinted, staring at the concrete frame next to me, trying to swallow and trying to keep the tears at bay. "But I hurt you." My voice broke. "I was stubborn. I wouldn't take your calls. I wouldn't listen. I slept with . . . I did sleep with Joe," I cried. "And then you disappeared."
"I know," he whispered, "and now you're . . . Please, don't. Even if it'll never be me, don't marry him—not him. I can't say congratulations, sit back and do nothing while you're—"
"It'll never be you, huh?" I snorted, wiping my eyes and leaving the doorway. Not caring who saw me, I still needed to get away and turned the corner.
"Kylie!"
I walked faster.
"Ky, stop!" I heard rapid, heavy footfalls behind me. "Christ." Gio pulled my arm, making me face him. "You didn't listen to me before. Remember prom night? You were so fucking hardheaded," he shouted. "Just take a minute and think!" He pointed to his temple.
My lip quivered and I bit it down.
"Joe is a piece-of-shit." He held my hand. "You deserve better, Kylie. I wasn't going to tell you because I thought you'd think I was just saying it to hurt you. I was going to tell my father . . . or tell Dame and Ant, and we'd jump him later," he laughed.
I swallowed down my tears. "What? I don't understand."
"The doorway we were just standing in?" he asked. "I stood there for an hour—I saw some things, like, Joe and Carli sneaking into a backseat."
"I—" I slumped my shoulders. For some reason, hearing that didn't hurt nearly as much as I thought it should, and it didn't surprise me. "I miss you." I choked on a sob.
"What?" He grinned. "Now I'm confused."
"I said that I miss you." I held my belly in place.
He reached out to wipe under my nose, and I realized I was probably a mess. "Why are you determined on turning into the one thing you swore you never would?"
I didn't have an answer for him right away. It took me a second. "My mother . . . she's pretty wonderful. I spent a lot of time with her over the summer, even though I didn't make it easy. If I turned into half the woman, wife, mother she is—"
"And marrying Joe is going to make that happen?"
"I—" I had no idea what to say.
"We were going to get away from here." His eyes were glassy. "Start our lives close by enough because they mean so much, but maintain our distance from our families."
"I screwed it all up." I shrugged, slapping my hands down on my hips. "I am so sorry—you're better, you deserve better than me." I pointed to myself. "Your dad, your family is great, and kind of functional, even if your parents are divorced."
"Kylie," he shook his head, "my dad was never home. Your parents practically raised me—if I wasn't being shipped off to my mother or coming back. What are you talking about?"
"They're—they're not weird or whatever." I was stuck again, rethinking what I'd just said again, knowing I was making excuses again, while also knowing Gio's words to be true. "God, I am stupid—"
"Don't say that. You've always had issues with common sense."
I kept going. "I was so hurt—wanted to hurt you, which I did, and . . . I hurt myself even more. The shit I put my parents through…I've been spreading my misery since you left." I palmed my forehead, hating that I also openly admitted that. "I'm just—"
"They'll forgive you," he whispered.
"Joe was there for me. He cared, and I thought—well, at first I thought he was great. He was mature, and then, and then he asked me to marry him. What was I supposed to say?" My face crumbled. "He got on one knee and everything."
Gio chuckled through his tears. "No? You could have said no."
He made me laugh with that one and smack his arm.
"I'm not better than you, Kylie." He placed his arms around me, and I held my breath—wanting somehow to freeze this moment as I cried into his chest. "It was a long summer, and this last month dragged . . . I didn't sleep with Heather, but I was miserable like you, and we weren't together." He sniffed my hair and sighed. "Lavender. Every time I smell it, I think of you. It's my favorite scent."
I hugged him tighter and my chest ached at the thought of letting him go.
"My new roommate . . . we partied, I slept around, trying to forget you. When I heard you were getting married . . . Christ, Kylie. I thought I'd hold off until winter break, and then seek you out. I didn't think—I thought you'd break up with him, never thought you'd go through with it, and then I find out you're getting married so soon. I called . . . not your cell, but I spoke to your dad."
I didn't say anything, wanting him to kidnap me or something.
"If, if you don't want me, I understand. You moved on—"
"No!" I shouted. "How can you forgive me?"
He leaned away. "It's not about forgiving you, which . . . I've already done—"
"Me, too." Whether he slept with Heather or didn't, which I am now starting to believe, I'd let go of that anger.
Because being with him—being his friend—was so much more important.
And being with him, regardless of what he did or didn't do, was better than being without him.
And if he could forgive me—still love me regardless of what I'd done, I'd know he was the one.
"It hurts too much to be away from you." He smiled. "You're my best friend."
"You're mine, too." I took in a shaky breath.
"What about Joe?" He pushed my hair away from my face.
I grinned, holding his hand to my cheek. "Carli can have him."
Gio laughed. "I—Kylie, I love you . . . always have."
I nodded. "I love you, too."
He bent low to gently place his lips to mine, and that wasn't enough for me. Overcome with joy, I practically crawled up his body—latched on like some lunatic. It wasn't something I had to think about. It was a natural response. Deepening our kiss, making it sloppy and heart stopping, wasn't something we had to try for either.
It just happened.
I was home—where I was supposed to be.
Thank you for reading.
Please leave me your thoughts.