Ownership: No ownership of Glee, Dalton. Same for the musical number. But I have lots of real dvd's and cd's. I own my imagination, and I won't relinquish my right to that. Tay and Scott are my babies. Copy rights to Glee or Adam Lambert music, yeah they've got 'em, not me. But my words are mine, esp what isn't recognized from anywhere else. This story is mine, and I'm happy to share with you to read. {conversations of creation only through the pm, it's all so deep.}
Musical Inspiration: Fever and Sleepwalker by Adam Lambert. From the album: Glam Nation Live.
Warning: Trigger issues. MxM issues.
I don't have any association with anyone for music. I've purchased all that I listen to. I'm just letting you know about the music. If you want to listen, then do so. If not then don't.
I do have a lot of music legit and I don't ship pirating.
~ The Fantasy ~
With the first beat of the song, sudden dread fills in Tay's being. He'd watch the whole performance so many times, knowing it was becoming more than a performance. Knowing that his heart was breaking.
From right to left, three slow steps it took for Chase to reach the stairs. Four steps for Scott to descend.
Chase'd put his arm around Scott's backside. From his vantage point, Tay could see Scott move in delight. A grab of Chase's chin, different to how he'd hold Tay.
The jealousy was building and brimming, and he had to quash it all down. Pretend what he was seeing was just part of the show. He knew different, he felt different, his lover was exhilarated and very turned on. And it was all wrong, and it couldn't be allowed to continue.
Shinnae taps him on the shoulder, "Nearly time for us." It was good to have some other human touch, bring him out of his thoughts. So he could watch his lover, betraying him.
Just in time for that 'kiss', that famous kiss that had the world talking. Only they should have been talking about Scott and Tay, not Scott and Chase.
It was Tay's suggestion, stupid suggestion. It was how Scott had sung to him the first time. And he acted out a fantasy scene, and it blended so well. And straight after the song was finished, it blended into a delightful amount of play. That turned into hours of delightful love making.
But now, after months of torturous observations, noticing how extra 'turned on' Scott was. Now he added more to the fantasy. And wondered how to extend it, into reality.
He watched another kiss, then once more, throws himself into the choreographed dance routine.
'Step up and look to the audience, left steps toward Scott, lean down into Scott's side, mimic the dancer on Scott's left. Stand up, arms back, raised chin and smile, and wink at Scott.' And Scott points but is halted a split second. 'See if they notice the moment you falter there?
Front, back at you. Eyes connect, I smile, yeah lean into him, I dare you. Around you we go, lean down, raise up, front to audience. We continue, we kneel down. Yeah, look at me, that's right, you know I'm here. You're mine, don't forget it.'
And Scott is very aware of Tay's presence, not just his dance moves but his steely looks are boring into Scott's back, and he sure as hell is getting thrown off his routine tonight.
Later on Tay would watch the finished production of the concert, and make notes of significant memorable points.
When he dances with Shinnae and Natalia, Scott knew his difficult part was coming. And his difficult part, was watching Tay's physical embraces of Shinnae. He felt what Tay felt about him and Chase. He felt that Tay was getting too turned on with Shinnae. It seemed more than a routine dance.
Walk across the stage, turn before stairs, hold. Face audience, push, pull, hold, repeat. Step right, lean down, roll shoulders, all lean into Scott. All dance around Scott, he points they fall, Tay looks at Scott, Scott falters. Missing a beat in the song.
Stepping skips to left of stage, Scott walks to the right. Tay turns, holds position, turns and watches as Scott thrusts his pelvis into a female's face. Tay burns with rage, and holds still knowing that the thick make up is concealing his true self.
Scott pumps and gyrates in the dance move and Tay thanks God for his baggier pants.
As Scott gets to the centre of the stage, and thumps his bare feet to the beat, he looks just a bit behind, and can see Tay and Shinnae from the corner of his sight. And they're doing what he hates to see them do. Tay lifts Shinnae up, she climbs on him for more height. He holds her tight, and turns an embrace that lowers her like a cork screw around him. She ends up near his crotch, and falls to the floor. All too suggestive for Scott, he hiccups words of the song and now he's messing up the lines too much.
Thankfully there are five beats of no words, and the dancers can improvise to regain their footing.
The dancers stand around, making a wider circle of Scott. He's centre stage, just where Tay and Scott love him to be. Back to the audience, gyrate and hold a few moments. Tay sees Chase flicker smiles and a wink at Scott. Supposedly reassurance, but the look from Tay stops him.
'Shit, he'll think I'm flirting with Scott again!'
Dancers crouch down, in submission, weave in and out and around and back. Throwing their single arms in unison, up, down, around. As Scott reaches a pinnacle of the song, lowering his arms back and his crotch forward, throws his head back and around, the dancers throw themselves onto the floor.
As he hits the height of "MINE", the vibrations feed out from the speakers to Tay. And there is no one in the building, no body else there. The room is deathly quiet, and cold. It's just Scott and Tay. Scott's yelling at Tay, and Tay's knowing full well Scott is hearing him yelling also, that 'you're MINE', too!
The beat resumes, the dancers follow Scott to the side table, sit and stand, fan and clap. Up and follow him to the centre. Steps of determination, heated lust between Tay and Scott.
Gyrations, shoulder moves, looking behind, catching Tay's looks, feeling them bore into his back. This is the worst Scott has felt during a performance. 'What the hell has got into Tay? Is he trying to ruin this for me. Wait, what was that look for?'
The moment Scott climbs back up the steps and turns, Chase mouths him a reassuring kiss, knowing that Tay is behind him and can't see. This throws Scott back into knowing that this song is nearly over, and he has an interlude to compose himself. A great amount of time where Tay will be on stage with all the others, the only time of the night when Scott feels free from everyone.
Only this time, Chase has decided to get his sub in, and join Scott for a breather.
"Hey Scott, wait up." Chase jogs to catch up. Scott had run the moment his feet left the stage. He wanted more than a breather, he didn't want the rest of the concert to continue.
"What the hell are you doing?" he looks over Chase's shoulder to see if Tay had followed him. He grabs Chase and pulls him into the dressing room. Shuts the door and pushes him down on the couch. "What is it with him up there tonight? Honestly, I lost my head when I missed those words." Pouring two drinks, his hands giving into his real emotions.
"Here, have one." he gets his next outfit ready, just adding a long overcoat. "I'm gonna be warm in this. I have to change, why did you come back here?" He holds it up, checks out the features, puts it back on the rack, then sits opposite to Chase.
"I came back 'cause I could see how rattled you were. I'm certain Tay's losing the plot, tonight."
"Yeah, well that's pretty obvious. I saw you freak out after the first wink."
"Oh the filthy look he gave me. I was certain he was going to break and deck me."
"Well, what'd you think would happen?" He gets up and pours some more, "You need more?" "No, I'm fine, thanks."
Chase hadn't been helpful. It reminded Scott of Tay's insecurities. He needed reassurance, he needed comfort. That's the constant feeding to hopefully, allay insecurities. Ten minutes goes by rather fast.
"The best way of dealing with anything that goes on, on stage, is to just keep the music and dances moving." Finally Scott sits without aggravation of the first segment of the show. "Now we have to go back out there, and you think he won't be thinking things?"
"You looked rattled, I was too worried. I suppose I could sit this one out too."
"No, I think the paparazzi will notice, and then the rumour mills will start up." Scott gets up, puts the overcoat on, tidies his makeup and hair. "You go out first, keep the interlude going two bars more."
"Sounds like a plan."
As Scott took his breather, Tay noticed the guitarists absence during the interlude. And it doesn't sit well with him. He manages not to falter, something he's very proud of. It had been noticed by the others as well. The other dancers avoided Scott as they went passed. Tay's dressing room door slammed shut, and everyone nearby who felt it, stopped a moment.
Scott ignored him "Here we go then, round two people." He throws his whole heart into the next number. Hoping Tay will listen.
As he sings, the memory of where and how the song came about, flashes through his mind.
He's looking at photos, of good and bad times. Tears fall, he writes. It's raining outside, summer rains hardly making sounds. He didn't notice Tay's hand on his shoulder, until a kiss on his head. "Got a quick song in you? I love watching you in action." They'd made love that morning, and been taken to Heaven. When they'd finished, Scott felt his dreams of delight were always best, being awoken to Tay's morning advances. Looking over his notes, it seemed too mushy a love song. He wanted a darker piece. A piece about escaping, from nightmares and sleepwalking.
The photos bring memories, reminders of where they used to be, when they were lost and lonely. He was everything he wanted, but it took some convincing for Tay to see he wanted Scott too. Once his mind was made up, Scott wanted to turn this relationship around, and be happier. How to break a nightmare, a bad dream and make it a reality.
The laser lights caught in his eye, the guitarist brings up his solo, Scott turns and faces Chase. They don't smile or share anything, just eye contact. A moment sufficient, for Scott to compose himself and belt the next few bars of the song out.
Downstairs Tay is watching on the monitor. As Scott turned toward Chase, the guitarist's solo began, and he'd seen the eyebrow quiver from Chase.
"You're reading too much into this, honestly." Shinnae brings him out of his reverie.
He turns to her, knowing how upset Scott is with their friendship. "Come back here Shinnae?" He hugs her tight, kisses her forehead and hugs just a little more.
"Our secret, don't tell?" he says.
"Our secret, won't tell?" and taps him on his nose.
Little Author Notes from a cute little author: I'd love a review from you please? It's part of the price you must pay. Make it honest, but not nasty.