Rating: T for some cursing.
Disclaimer: Gilmore Girls belongs to Amy Sherman-Palladino and the WB/CW.
When she made her way back into the room he scraped it back a little more before giving its neighbour a kick that sent it skidding a couple of feet out from the table. Dropped heavily onto it and laced his fingers behind his head, turning closed eyes on the ceiling.
She sat, still smearing at her left eye. Twitched her nose in a sniff and prayed hands together between her thighs, hunching.
The breath he sent up gave out in the end, and after that everything just sort of tumbled down. With effort he leaned an elbow on the sticky formica, knuckling his temple and intent on a mug ring on the surface.
"I hate that, you know?" he said. Finally. Finally looking up at her. Lines drawn between her eyebrows.
The hand on his knee gestured at her vaguely. "That you're crying. And before. That I -" She watched him shake his head on the knuckle-pivot and sniffed again. "- -It's messed up."
Hands still clasped, her shoulder rose to brush ineffectually a straggling lock of hair away from her face.
"Look," he continued, "what happened back there ... I ... I was outta line, okay? I mean the yelling and whatever, but the stuff before ... it wasn't -"
"I don't care," she said.
"You -?"
"I'm not mad at you, Jess," she said, cutting across his quizzical look. "Not for ... you know. For that."
"No?"
"Well," she paused, "I still don't get why you'd think there was a good -"
"I don't. I don't know why, alright? It was dumb. But I just ... I don't know."
He lapsed into silence and pushed a thumbnail against the rim of the coffee stain, flaking it slowly.
She rushed out, "I'm sorry I said - -I mean, I know there's nothing wrong with you, but -"
"Rory, come on," he said, "you don't have to -"
"Anyway," she said, increasing her volume a little, "I was mad at you then for getting mad at me. Right now? I think I ..."
Nothing came.
She frowned out a huff and began again, "If I'm still mad at you at all it's because you won't tell me what's up with you. Or haven't yet, anyway. So spill, Jess, what is it?"
He sighed.
Something whirred and clicked into life in the kitchen, settling into a low electric hum. Her clamped lips started to go warm at the pressed edges.
A breeze shivered the door in its frame, and he unbent suddenly, forearm hitting the table-top.
"Stupid place kicked me out okay?"
"But -"
"Actually, pretty much dropped out a couple' weeks ago, but they just got around to letting me know, so ..."
He shrugged.
"You mean ... today?"
A nod.
"But," she said, "how is that even -? Why wouldn't they tell you, or - -How come they didn't call Luke?"
"Beats me." Another shrug. "Said they gave me enough warning slips or whatever, but I figured they'd've hauled me in if they were serious. Or dragged Luke down there or something."
"They should have called Luke at least," she said animatedly. "Or written a letter, or - -Something! I don't get it. This isn't right, Jess," she told him with a shake of her head. "They can't just - -Well first you need to tell Luke and then we -"
"Know any good motels? And when I say good, I mean cheap."
"What? Why?"
"You think he's gonna just roll out the welcome mat after this crap? He wants me gone yesterday."
"That's bull, Jess, and you know it."
"You think, huh?"
"Fine," she conceded with a sigh. "But if he's going to wig he's going to wig more at Principal Merton - -Or that dopey ... whatshername? The secretary. Okay, you skipped school, but they let you, Jess. They let you for, what, twenty-something days?"
"About that," he said, looking round at the register. "Little more maybe."
"So, twenty five?"
He didn't nod.
"Thirty? Jess, you missed thirty days? That's six weeks of -"
"Hey, in case you didn't notice, not everyone's got a trust fund just sitting around waiting for 'em to start raking it out."
"Jess -"
"Sorry, look, I'm not trying to be a jerk, but ..." His shoulders lifted. "Seriously, you think I don't know I fucked up? And come on, it's not like there's a million ways this could've played out, you know? No way I'm sticking at this ridiculous Odd Couple thing forever - -Hell, no way Luke wants me here past my mythical graduation, so what am I supposed to do, huh? I'm working my ass off and now what? Car's gone, job's gone, kicked out sooner or later -"
"But -"
"I got nothing, okay?" rifled out fast and hard. "I'm screwed."
She covered her silent mouth.
"So," he said. And paused. "There you go." He shrugged and managed a smirk. "Feel better?"
Not bitterly.
He rested both elbows on his knees, head dropping as his hands almost came together, then simply hung. "Christ, even Liz graduated high school."
Her thumbnail parted her teeth. "Maybe if you take summer school -"
"Nope. Said repeat or get out, that's it."
"But they messed up, Jess. Luke can get a meeting, then they'll see, and -"
"Yeah, don't hold your breath," he said looking up. Expressionless.
It brought the thumbnail back between her teeth.
He wrenched himself up and sat back, harrowing a palm down over his mouth.
Setting her chin on her fist, she said, "We should try, though."
His eyebrows rose, drawing her shoulders up in response as she went on, "It can't hurt to try."
"Okay," he said with half a shrug. "If you say so."
Her small smile tugged hard at the corner of his mouth.
"And ... I mean, it'd be worth it if it works." She hesitated. "Wouldn't it?"
He was nodding rhythmically when he said, "To spend another crappy summer on my own in this dump? Sure."
"So ... what if I write this time?" she said coyly.
"To really rub it in?"
"Jess."
He levered an arm up to the back of the chair and cocked his head, hand scruffing through the back of his hair. "Then I guess I'll have something to read."
She pointed a sharp finger. "No deal unless you write back, mister."
"Rory Gilmore, Continental Europe, right?"
"Oh, come on. Didn't you ever think sending something poste restante was romantic?"
"Because apparently we're still in the Jazz Age."
"How about," she mused, "I send letters, you Yahoo?"
"No postcards?"
She wrinkled her nose. "The mailman can read what you put on a postcard."
"Huh."
"Shut up," she said, rolling her eyes.
"Fine," he nodded. "If you want."
"Deal?"
"Deal."
"So you'll tell Luke when he gets back?"
"Wait, I don't think I understood this deal."
"Jess, you know you can't -"
"Look, it's not like I have a choice, is it? Not unless those motels you're gonna tell me about are so cheap they're actually free."
"Seriously, don't trust the proprietor when they say you'll 'Work something out,'" she smirked.
"Your mind's just all class, isn't it?"
She smiled and set an elbow on the table to lean her cheek on the heel of her hand.
"Plead the fifth, huh?" he said.
"So you'll talk to Luke?"
"You see a way I can avoid it?"
"Okay. Good."
"Yeah, I don't think that word means what you think it means."
"Pfft," she said, flicking her foot at his. "So ... Lane got sick."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. And she drunk-dialled her mom," she said with assumed breeziness.
"Holy -"
"Yup. Told her all about the party, the band. Dave - -The whole thing."
"Huh. You said goodbye, right?"
"I should check my passport."
"Good idea."
Her free hand swept hair behind her ear before she pinned the palm on the table with her elbow.
"I mean, I'll email too," she said. "But letters are -"
"Look, what you said before -"
"Forget it, Jess."
"I don't wanna forget it."
"But I don't want you to feel like -"
"I don't. I just - -It's not something you just ..."
"I know," she broke in at the pause. "I know that. I totally know that. More than you know, and -"
"Never have, you know?"
"Oh," she said. The pads of two fingers drew over her lips.
"Yeah, so ..."
She got up.
His watching eyes reacted faster, but he sat quickly upright, mouth open.
Two steps to stand between his knees.
Laid a palm on his cheek and stooped to kiss him.
Just once.
"Huh."
Still craning back to look up. Literally taken aback.
"It's okay, Jess."
"What is?"
"Everything."
"Huh."
"No pressure," she said.
But he fitted his thumbs to her waist as he straightened, and before she knew it the edge of the table ruled across the backs of her thighs. Fingers snaked into her hair at the base of her skull.
It was the kiss that hitched her up that half inch. Just enough weight off treacherous legs.
The kiss that emptied her heart until it stuttered hard onto her ribs, but differently.
"I do though," he said beneath her ear. "Love you. And you know it."
She almost couldn't nod.
A/N: Thanks for reading and reviewing. There's more, but, just for a change, I thought I'd publish this without waiting to have the whole thing finished beforehand. I hope you'll stick around.