Thank you to all who left a review! As promised, here is chapter 2. It's the day of Bushra's party, and all is about to begin...
~s~c~
It's been a weird day. Excitingly weird. Scary weird. And the day is nowhere near over. Bushra's party hasn't even started yet.
I'm at the venue. For the moment, I'm on my own. Mum and dad are still at the unit. Christian is with Amira. I'm glad for this tiny moment of reprieve, as I think back to the events of earlier this morning.
Today started with a bang. I showed up on Christians' doorstep at the crack of dawn, as planned. What I did not plan however, is for Christian to be half naked when he opened the door. I'm still amazed I managed to keep the friendly mask in place, pretty much say what I had planned to say and manage to get out without making to much of a fool of myself. Lots of practice I guess.
Oblivious to everything around me, I rushed into the unit, making it just in time for me to collapse into the closed door behind me. My trembling knees buckled underneath me and I let myself slid onto the floor, back resting against the door. My eyes saw nothing but that image of him, just out of bed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. His body looking still warm and soft from sleep, his short hair slightly ruffled.
I had wondered what it would be like. To spend the night with that man, watch him sleep and be there when he woke. What he would look like in the morning. Now I know. And I wouldn't forget it in a hurry. Even though I resisted the urge to let my eyes roam all over his naked skin, I saw enough. The image of Christian, standing before me, barely dressed, is imprinted on my brain.
Luckily, it took him a while to come in, so I could pull myself together. For a while, we worked together in contented silence. This silence only being broken by my 'oopses' and 'sorrys' as I bumped into him (twice), brushed up against him to reach for some ingredient (five times) and touched his hand while grabbing for something at the same time (sadly only once). He just smiled at me indulgently, occasionally laying a comforting hand on my shoulder in an attempt to calm me down.
I sit down on one of the chairs, close my eyes and think back to that one moment. It's like it's happening all over again, right here, right now, in front of my eyes…
~s~c~
It hits me when I watch him doing the final checks. He is concentrating on his task, leaving me free to drink in every square inch of his body. He is fully clothed now, wearing a uniform to protect the clothes underneath. But I see him as he was this morning. I stare at the only part of him that was covered, his hips, his arse, his thighs, and try to imagine what they would look like naked. Just as tantalizing as the rest of his body, I am sure.
As my mind shows me images of a naked Christian, purposely coming towards me, skin tanned and smooth, glistening with sweat, muscles visibly rolling and flexing underneath, my lips part and my breath shallows. I imagine what he could do to me, what I want him to do to me, over and over again. I swallow and close my eyes. More images assault my brain. What if… What if I did the unthinkable? What if… I let my hands do exactly what they want, touch every part of that man, starting with that delectable arse. I imagine myself being bold enough to just take what I want, touch him, undress him, and touch him some more. Kiss him, slow hot kisses, turning into feverous, ravenous, devouring kisses as soon as he battles me for dominance and I happily submit. This thought wrenches a strangled cry from my lips. Horrified, I open my eyes, to see if he has noticed. I open mine, only to be confronted with the confused stare of his startlingly green eyes.
'Syed? You ok?' he inquires softly.
His eyes are examining mine. I can tell he doesn't get it. He searches my face for answers. It's like I'm frozen to the spot. For a moment, I want nothing more than for him to read me, damn the consequences. But my defences have been trained for this too long. I can feel my mask slide back into place and force my lips into a friendly smile.
'It's nothing. I just… I was worried about mum having to sing. Have you spoken to Amira yet?' I marvel at my own quick thinking.
'Not yet', he sais, while checking his watch, 'It was a bit early before, but I think I can risk it now'.
'Would you mind going right away? It's just that I'm a bit worried if she'll go for it'.
'Course she will! Allright, allright. I'm going!'
'Thanks Christian. That really means a lot'.
'What are friends for?'
And with a wink, he is gone.
~s~c~
Back on my chair, I tell myself that was dangerously close. Too close, I berate myself. I remind myself of all the reasons why I can never, NEVER, give into these feelings. Even if I hadn't made that promise to myself, giving into my feelings for Christian would not be an option. He is in my world, my parents' world. They would find out. My heart chills at the thought.
But what if I had met him a year ago? Before they let me back into their lives? Would I have dared to approach Christian then? If I had met him, one of those few nights I ventured into a club?
No. No, I would not. Because the only thing I went looking for in those clubs, was some nobody I could forget about the next day. And Christian would never be a nobody. Not to me. And as for forgetting him the next day? Not bloody likely.
I sigh and lower my head into my hands. I've thought about this countless times. What if. Even if I did, in a moment of madness, kiss him, touch him, embrace him, what's to say he'd welcome it? Would he push me away? Laugh in my face? Look at me with understanding and pity? I swallow hard. I think that might kill me.
Or would he be pleasantly surprised? Return my advances enthusiastically? Kiss me, devour me, ravish me, shag me senseless? My body flushes at the thought, my heart races and my erection strains against my pants. I spread my legs slightly to relieve the tension. The thought of him, sprawled all over me, skin touching skin, mouths close enough to breathe each others air… His gentle fingers, caressing me, touching every part of me, stroking me, breaching me, probing me…
With a frustrated cry, I wrench my head up, straighten my back and launch myself out of the chair. Restlessly, I stalk up and down the room, forcing an end to those mind-blowing images. Is that what you want Syed? I ask myself sarcastically. For him to take what he wants from you, say 'thank you very much' and then forget all about you? Is that going to be enough for you then? You think you'll be cured from these feelings after that? I let out a bitter laugh. I know it would be torture. Seeing him every day. No more need to imagine his touch, his kiss, the feel of him inside me. I would remember. I would know exactly what it would be like. And I would want more. So much more. It would be the death of me. That is if my parents didn't find out and kill me first.
No. It is just not happening. I force the thoughts out of my head, and attempt to distract myself by the chores still at hand. The decorating is almost done, but I notice a tablecloth that is spread slightly crookedly over a table. Decisively, I straighten it and look for the next chore that needs doing. As I let my eyes wander around the room, I suddenly notice him come through the door. I almost choke on my breath. Christian. He's wearing a formal white shirt and black trousers. He looks striking. I smile and wave him over, feeling my iron resolve begin to melt already.
I suddenly think back to early this morning, standing on his doorstep.
'This is gonna be the day from hell, isn't it?' I remember asking.
I didn't know how right I was…
~s~c~
If you liked this chapter and would like to read more, please leave me a review! Oh, and for those of you who have asked me for this story from Christians' POV, don't worry, I'll get there ;-)
I'll try and update next weekend.