A/N: Wow, thank you all for the warm reviews!

Since this has been completely written - 2 years ago (LOL) - I don't see the harm in not keeping you waiting.


With a gasp for air, Tim surged upright in his bed; the pitch black darkness of his bedroom hitting him with the force of a cold bucket of water. Taking a minute to take stock of his surroundings, his heart plummeted. It had only been a dream. He knew it couldn't have been real! He rubbed one trembling hand across his face while reaching out to slap at the alarm clock off with the other. Several attempts later, he finally managed to put an end to the offending noise, bringing an abrupt and eerie silence to the room. A shiver ran down his spine, causing him to think twice about getting out of bed.

Shock and disbelief were still resident in his mind and even in his heart. Never in a million years would he have thought of travelling down the road his dream had just taken him. But, now? At this very moment while the pleasurable feelings were still rampant in his mind, he couldn't think of a single reason not to be on that road; not to turn around and go back to that invisible stop sign he'd just been ripped away from. As a matter of fact, with every passing second he sat there thinking on it, he began to think something new had somehow just been awakened inside himself That's ridiculous! I. Am. Not. Gay!

Pushing his crumpled pile of bedcovers further aside beyond where they'd been shoved during his vivid dream, refusing to let himself think on any part of anything at the moment, Tim lumbered unsteadily to his feet and cautiously made his way to his kitchen to turn the coffee maker on. The timer wasn't ready to go off for the automatic brewing cycle, but he couldn't wait. He needed coffee and he needed it right now!

That dream had taken a lot out of him, surprisingly enough, he felt more tired now than he had when he'd gone to bed last night. On his unsteady feet, he headed to the shower, also needing to get ready for work. No matter what weird place his dreams had just taken him, or how muddled his mind was now because of it or even what sleep he'd lost on account of it, work wouldn't wait and there was no way he'd get away with being late.

Like the proverbial light bulb going off in his head, he realized with more clarity in this moment of thinking than the last one, that if he had his choice right about now, he'd go back to that moment in his dream, that moment of being safely tucked away in that embrace. He go back to that moment when he was mesmerized by those eyes silently filling him with something he couldn't get enough of and being swept away by that heart stopping kiss; of finally being loved for himself; even if it was just in the physical sense.

He'd go back to that moment and this time, he'd stay there.

It sure beat the hell out of the loneliness and heartbreak he'd endured time after time; this last heartbreaking breakup being the straw that had broken the camel's back. It was enough to make him wish he'd gone and joined that monastery back when he'd off-handedly joked about doing it. It had certainly crossed his mind last night as a distinct possibility for his future. Wait a minute! Was that what had triggered this truly strange experience? But she just broke up with me a week ago! That's ridiculous!

Every time he'd tried to date had ended badly, becoming yet another time in his life that was deeply painful and very nearly soul crushing. Most especially in the case of 'Amanda'. Having fallen for that young woman very quickly and almost too hard, he'd wound up almost getting killed by her and left him with a broken heart yet again and a soul that now cried silent tears destined for pain and failure. Apparently, this last relationship, with Melissa, had proven his soul was indeed destined for that.

Only his dreams, it seemed, had decided to play a cruel joke on him. He preferred thinking it was something he had eaten last night that just didn't agree with him. It hurt less to hold onto that explanation.

Tim knew that the reality of the situation with his dream had nothing whatsoever to do with anything he'd eaten before he went to bed, but rather, it had everything to do with Melissa. Not even two months ago, he had lost his head over the beautiful blonde haired coffee bar attendant with the most alluring brown eyes and had subsequently and successfully knocked her off her feet. With a whirlwind two months of dates and all night talks about themselves, each other and what they wanted out of life, he had rapidly fallen for her and hard.

At the same time, he'd done his best to hold the truth of his emotions back even though it had been extremely difficult. There had been times when Tim had felt like two different people; one who felt all of the emotions of a man falling in love and wanted to share them openly and one who refused to admit to any emotion at all for fear of being ridiculed or walked on or worse; abandoned.

Apparently, Melissa had gotten the same vibe from Tim. She'd refused to spend any time trying to work through whatever was causing him to seem like two different people; trying to get to know him on a deeper level Instead, she'd pled the incapability to work things out. She'd hidden behind the claim that she felt overwhelmed at the idea of there being hidden layers of who he was that she'd not yet been privy too. With a kiss to the cheek and a "I'll call you," she was gone and hadn't called him since.

Through the waves of regret and hurt, the only relief Tim had the opportunity to feel this time, had come from the knowledge that he'd managed to keep this relationship a complete secret from the team. The last thing he'd wanted was for any of them to have the ammunition with which to tease, taunt or laugh at him about. Now all he could think was, Thank God, I won't have to take any ribbing from Tony about my weird dream.

Dragging himself through the beginning of his morning routine, Tim felt like he was operating on auto-pilot, feeling almost displaced from himself, like he was watching someone else operate his body for him as his brain continued to remain muddled in the confusion left by his dream. The outer body feeling was yet another new experience of weirdness compounded with the twilight zone feel his dream had left him with. All he wanted was to go back to bed and sleep; this time, without dreaming. Against his own wishes, his brain jumped back on track and wildly raced to figure out what had just happened.

What the hell was going on? What weird food had he eaten before he went to bed last night? Whatever it was, he'd make damn sure he didn't repeat that mistake again! The letdown when he woke up was almost too much to take! Wait, a minute! Had his brain just said what he heard it say? Letdown? Sighing out in frustration, Tim looked himself over in the tall hallway mirror, noticing almost right away, that his boxers were still tented, which meant it would be a cold shower for him this morning Oh, God, what was happening to him? Who would have thought that another painfully failed relationship would send his mind down the completely foreign road his dream tonight had taken him just now?

His dreams had never been so erotic or so not normal before. Those eyes! He couldn't get those eyes out of his mind. Everything he could read in those eyes still sent tingling down his spine and was keeping the tent going in his boxers, too. That embrace that felt so wonderful and right and safe; oh, God, he wished he were still back in dreamland. God, what was he thinkin? He couldn't live there and he knew it! Too good to be true! Sighing loudly in frustration and confusion, Tim forced his feet in the direction of his bathroom. The need for a cold shower had never been so great before.

Maybe, just maybe, it could still be a good day and he could put this weird, sensuous dream out of his mind and forget about it. He could only hope so!

***NCIS***

"Hey, Probie! What's up with you? Almost late and lookin' a little ragged under the collar, too? Losin' sleep are we? Don't tell me, another all nighter with the elves and elf lords in gamer's life? After all these years, you'd think you'd grow up and find a new hobby by now." Tony relentlessly teased as Tim wearily trudged into the squad room with barely five minutes to spare. "Not like you to be this late, McGee. I thought we were gonna have to call out the calvery to locate your almost tardy butt. What's up with that?"

"Nothing, Tony." Tim replied firmly. "Morning, Ziva." He greeted his other teammate deliberately and politely partly in an effort to force the subject of Tony's attention off himself and onto something/anything else.

"Good morning, McGee." Ziva replied with a smile. "I believe Tony is right. You do look , oh, what is the word….?"

"Ragged." Tony offered with a grin firmly plastered on his face. "Actually, a better word would be the phrase, 'like crap' What gives, Probie? You've been absolutely mum about your off hours for months now, it's been worse than tryin' to break into Fort Knox! And this morning you're comin' in here lookin' like you haven't slept a wink."

"Like I said, Tony, it's nothing." Tim replied as he looked Tony square on and silently told him to back off; his eyes nearly shooting the message to him. "Just because I refuse to give you any ammunition to use against me, doesn't mean there's something wrong." He gave back as he took himself to his own desk without further distraction. Almost automatically, he set his backpack down and immediately booted up his computer

"Okay, okay. Not that I believe you or anything, but just don't look to me to bail you out when El Jefe starts getting' on your case, McLiar." Tony quipped as he sat down in his desk chair and glared at the younger man.

"Gettin' on his case about what, DiNozzo?" Gibbs casually asked as he strolled into the squad room on his way to his desk.

Tim quickly got busy booting up his work station and glancing through the file Gibbs had just slid onto his desk as he waited to hear how Tony was going to explain the conversation the boss had just walked in on.

"Nuthin', Boss." Tony replied quickly as he gave his full attention to starting up his computer and beginning the daily grind.

"Mmm Mmm. Cold cases" Gibbs calmly ordered, knowing his team hated the inactive periods of time in between new cases, that required them to peruse old unsolved cases in hopes of finding what they'd missed before or looking for new clues. Unfortunately, they had to be done.

"God, I hate cold cases!" Tony griped.

"Comes with the territory." Gibbs reminded him as they all got busy going through the one that had been assigned to them.

"Yeah, I know. Still hate 'em though." Tony groused as he glanced at each of his teammates, stopping to stare at Tim, already busy typing away on his computer, his attention turned inward, ignoring those around him already. There was something off about the probie's posture and the completely worn out look he was sporting this morning but it was obvious that the younger man wasn't going to let anyone in on what was going on with him; at least, not without more of Tony's infamous pushing until he got what he wanted; the juicy details!

Shaking his head in frustration since that kind of fun would have to wait until after work, Tony quietened down and got to work on his own assigned case file.

Silence descended on the squad room eerily as the four agents began reading their cases, but soon enough, the room became filled with the noises of clacking computer keyboards and telephone calls being made in pursuit of the answers for their unsolved mysteries. Tim relied on computer searches as his mainstay of finding the information and was soon lost in the world of cyber searching and simultaneously planning ahead for which route he would take next if this one or that one didn't pan out.

"McGee!"

Gibbs' barked voice finally penetrated Tim's withdrawn brain cells and the younger man looked up, over at the boss; and froze. Those eyes!

"Hey!" Gibbs sent his voice across the room in another bark as his youngest agent seemed unable to stop staring at him with his eyes opening wider, as if in shock. What the heck was wrong with this kid? First it takes three times of calling his name to get his attention and now he looks like I've grown a second head or something!

Tim's eyes snapped shut for a second as his brain stopped mid-thought while his heart pounded in his chest, his breathing unsteady and shaky. Swallowing hard, he forced himself to calm down, breathing in and out carefully. This can't be right! It can't be real! Oh, God, don't let me look like an idiot over this. Have to stop thinking about this right now! After a moment or two of deliberated breathing, he brought himself back online, opened his eyes again and looked back at Gibbs and dared to speak; his voice uneven and seemingly loud. "Boss?"

"Coffee Run" Gibbs said as if he were making an understood reasonable request instead of an unexpected order.

"Oh. Yes, Boss." Tim replied as he nearly flew from the squad room on the requested mission embarrassment coloring his cheeks before he quite made it past the boss' desk. The irritation on the boss' face had been unmistakable and Tim hated being on the receiving end of that on a good day – and this- was turning into a not so good day.

"What the heck's up with him?" Tony quipped as he watched his teammate disappear down the hall toward the back stairwell.

"Something on your mind, DiNozzo?" Gibbs asked in his typical off-hand way of shutting down the topic of conversation.

"Uh, no, Boss. Nothing. Nothing at all." Tony stumbled though his backpedalling and quickly got back to the file in his hands.

Gibbs, on the other hand, was still trying to figure out what had been going on with his youngest agent for him to have reacted like that. It made no sense. He hadn't planned on sending him after the coffee, but after seeing him looking so unusually shocked and out of it, the boss was confident that sending him on that errand would help clear the kid's head and get it back in the game.

****NCIS****

Tim could hardly see straight as he walked to the coffee shop, his steps almost cautious and mind blowingly slow. It couldn't be! His mind had to be playing tricks on him! There was no way this could be right!"

Stop doing this to yourself. Just drop it!" Tim verbally scolded himself. Squaring his shoulders, he dropped the thought pattern into the outer limits of his thinking and turned his attention to the case he'd been reading, his steps picking up in pace and determination as he did.

By the time he got back to the squad room, Tim thought he'd stepped into yet another twilight zone. Everyone seemed to have taken happy pills or something while he'd been gone. Even the boss seemed to be in a genuinely good mood now, with all of them actually thanking him nicely for their drinks even if they didn't look up from their work. No head slaps were given out and no growling or yelling had gone down beyond that moment when the boss had needed his attention earlier in the morning. For the remainder of the day, everyone was being too nice and it was beginning to get scary when piled on top of everything else he couldn't quite get off his mind from the night before.

He managed to keep his thoughts focused on the case as he got back into studying and researching information for the cold case assigned to him. It wasn't long before he was once again, in his own little world of cyber searches and reading, bolstered by the equally busy teammates who together, kept the squad room free of disturbances as they trudged through their case files. The rest of the day passed with no further incidents of strangeness so the entire incident between Tim and the boss had been soon forgotten by all of them, except for Tim.

The events from within Tim's dream seemed to be keeping him company all day, despite his earlier efforts to put those thoughts under wraps; his mind nearly tripped over itself several times in an effort to make sense of it all. He found himself casting his eyes across the room at his boss several times throughout the day, moreso than he ever would have done on a normal day. Tim was thankful that no one had called him on those moments he couldn't help but try to catch a glimpse of those eyes; needing desperately to see that he was right (or wrong) once and for all. The uncertainty; that inability to know for sure one way or the other, was driving him insane!

The day dragged on and it seemed like it took forever, but eventually, quitting time arrived and the blessed words were spoken. "Go home!"

Tim flew from the squad room, too happy and too physically drained from sitting behind his desk all day to sit still for another minute. He couldn't help but be happy that he had gotten his dog settled with his parents for their retirement two months ago. It was a great match with their big fenced in yard and their days spent at home that could now be spent with the german shepherd for companionship and protection. It had turned out good for all of them, all the way around since nowow, when he was exhausted, like tonight, he could just go home and drop off to sleep without having to worry about Jethro's needs.

It seemed to take forever to get home , but eventually, Tim made it through his door, kicked off his shoes, locked up his badge and weapon, set his alarm clock, and dropped like a dead weight onto his bed, falling instantly asleep.