"He is stable for now," the doctor said. "He has what we call Pneumothorax which means there is air collected in the pleural space surrounding the lungs which is causing them to partially collapse."
"But he will be okay, right?" Maggie asked as she continued to embrace Olivia.
"Yes, we will keep him here for a week or two. Tomorrow morning, if this continues, we will do a small procedure to let the air out to relieve the pressure on his lungs."
"Can I see him?" Benson asked wiping the tears away.
"Yes, follow me."
As she stepped into the room, her eyes fell on the man in the bed. He looked tired and fragile, all because of her. She wanted to get into bed with him and hold him until he was okay, until he wasn't in any kind of pain. If anything happened to him, how could she ever forgive herself? She couldn't rob Charles of his father. She couldn't rob Maggie of her best friend. She couldn't rob the Intelligence team of their boss and friend. She couldn't rob herself of the love of her life. Hank Voight had to pull through for all of them. She realized, as she walked closer to his bed, that night had changed her perspective. She didn't care about their problems anymore. Olivia knew she couldn't stay away from him and that's what pushed her to make a decision that would change her life.
"If you pull that crap again, I promise you I will kill you myself." She said as she leaned down to kiss his forehead.
"I'm okay, Benson."
"You have a partially collapsed lung. How is that okay?"
"I'm breathing on my own, aren't I?"
"That doesn't change the fact that they will have to let the air out if the pressure doesn't stop."
"Olivia," he could feel in her voice that she was scared, "I am alive. I am breathing."
"You should have kept your mouth shut!"
"We both knew what they wanted to do with you. I could have never forgiven myself had they laid a hand on you."
"And look how that turned out! They could have killed you. Charles would have had to grow up without a father. I would have never forgiven myself."
"I'm here, Benson." Hank slightly squeezed her hand as she sat on the edge of the bed. "Charles will have his old man for a long time."
"He better because I need his old man too."
"You will have me for the rest of your lifeā¦to take you from behind just like you enjoy." He chuckled and grabbed his chest in pain.
"Until I'm an old lady?"
"Until you are an old lady."
Olivia leaned forward and gently kissed his lips. "Don't you ever scare me like that again, you hear me?"
"I won't."
"Sorry to interrupt," Maggie said from the door. "The doctors want to check on Hank and I need to do your stitches again, Olivia."
Maggie could see the fear in Olivia's face as she did her stitches again. She knew the woman was blaming herself for what had gone down that night even though it wasn't her fault. There was sadness in her eyes and Maggie knew Benson was picturing her life without Voight. She understood the love they had for each other and how much they needed one and other to keep living. After Regina's death, the pain had won and they took separate ways but that would change after that night. Maggie sensed they both saw they couldn't let go again.
"A penny for your thoughts."
"I was thinking about him."
"I could have never guessed that." The woman laughed as she sat next to Benson. "Elaborate."
"What if he had died?"
"But he didn't so don't go there."
"I wouldn't have been able to forgive myself."
"It wouldn't have been your fault."
"It would have! I would have left Charles without a father."
"And it would have been the saddest thing but I learned something a long time ago. Death comes with his job. Death comes with this life. I am surrounded by it every single day and, this is awful, but I am used to it by now. Would I have been sad had he died? Devastated. I would have missed him forever but I can't think about it. Not when there are others who are actually dying."
"How do you do it?"
"The same way you've been working on SVU all these years."
"Maggie," Trudy Platt stepped into the room, "Hank wants to see you for a minute. I'll stay with Olivia."
"Trudy," Benson said when Maggie was gone, "who do I talk to about a transfer?"
"Are you asking for yourself?"
"Yes. After tonight, I don't want to leave him. Never again."
"I can get you the papers ready but if you want to be on his team, you will have to talk to him."
"No, I don't want him to know. He would feel like I'm leaving my life behind for him and that isn't the case."
"Okay. Let me make a few phone calls. I could get the Commander to approve the transfer without having to tell him."
"I would appreciate that."
"Anything for my favorite couple."
Trudy Platt had been in Voight's life almost as long as Maggie. They had met at the Academy and had immediately become friends. When he put the Intelligence team together, he made it very clear he wanted her to be a part of it along with Olinsky and Dawson. Platt said yes without thinking about it. If there was someone she trusted with her life, it was Voight. If there was someone she knew would protect the city, it was him. And she knew if there was someone who could take care of him, it was Olivia Benson. She had witnessed the birth of their relationship, the development and the latest result. She knew they belonged together and they were the one couple that could come back from anything. She believed in them more than they believed in themselves.
"You wanted to see me, bad boy?"
"Oh, yes. Come on in, Maggie." He shifted in bed sitting up straight.
"What can I do for you?"
"I had my will re-written two months ago."
"No, we are not having this conversation."
"Sit your ass down and listen to me."
"They didn't stab the asshole in you." She said as she sat down on the chair next to the bed.
"Look, I can't talk to Olivia about it just yet cause she will break down on me."
"And I won't?"
"Come on, Maggie."
"Okay, fine. Tell me."
"The new will is in my safety box in the basement, you know the code." She did, it was the day he had first seen Olivia. "Half of what I own is for Charles and the rest is for her."
"I will remember all of this but she is the one by your side so she should know."
"And she will, if I make it out of here. But, if I don't, I need you to know."
"You will survive."
"We don't know that. It could go both ways. I could make it out in two weeks or I could die."
"You can't die, Hank."
"Believe me, that's not the outcome I'm rooting for."
"I'm serious. I'm not even thinking about Charles or about me. I'm thinking about her. You are all she has left and she wouldn't make it without you."
"I'm thinking about all of you." He closed his eyes for a second as the pain hit him. "And don't you think I know that? I can't leave her but I'm not in control of what happens."
"Just get some rest, okay? Stop thinking for a little while."
Hank knew Maggie was right. He was all Olivia had left. He was her family. He was her partner. He was her lover. He was her supporter. Yes, she had her team and they were like a family but it wasn't the same. They didn't know her like he did. They didn't understand her like he did. They didn't love her like he did. They would never be able to take care of her like he would. She was a strong woman but they were stronger together. He would fight for her because at the end of the day she was his life.
Olivia sat on the chair next to his bed watching him sleep. Despite the pain, he had been able to sleep for what was left of the night and didn't wake up when the doctors checked on him in the morning. Unlike him, she couldn't close her eyes for a second. She kept looking at the monitor controlling his heart. It was as if every beat reassured her he wasn't going anywhere. Every time she heard a beat, her heart felt at peace. She needed to hear it to know she wasn't dreaming and he had made it through the night.
"Good evening, sleepyhead." Benson smiled as he opened his eyes. "How are you feeling?"
"As if an elephant had been sitting on my chest."
"There kind of was but the pressure is starting to relieve itself so you'll be fine."
"Are you serious?"
"I am," she nodded with a smile. "The doctors confirmed it this morning. You didn't even flinch."
"I didn't feel anything."
"You were really tired."
"Have you been here all this time?"
"Where was I supposed to be?"
"Home. Resting."
"And leave you alone? No."
"Benson, you need to rest as well. You were beaten against a desk."
"And I made it out just fine, unlike you."
"Thank you for comparing your forehead cut to the six stabs to my chest."
"Helping you keep that ego under control."
"Oh where would I be without you?"
"Probably married to Maggie."
"Wow that hurt."
"Am I lying?"
"Yes, I probably would have married Trudy."
"You two would have been so happy," she said laughing.
"I love the way you laugh. Did you know that?"
"Oh no. Henry Voight don't you get all cheesy on me because you nearly died."
"Can you stop being such a pain in my ass and accept the compliment?"
"Thank you for the compliment now go back to being an ass."
"Speaking of ass."
"We aren't speaking about any ass."
"Your ass looked fine in that dress."
"Too bad your blood got all over it or I could have kept it."
"For me to tear it off with my teeth."
"The pain medicine has gotten to your brain."
"Maybe," Hank smirked at her. "I know you lied."
"When?"
"When he asked about the toys you like."
"Well, I wasn't about to tell him and your entire team what I like in bed."
"You like the vibrator better."
"You remember."
"When it comes to making you moan, I remember absolutely everything. Would you like me to show you?"
"Yes, but not right now. I would like you to fuck me and actually make it out alive."
"You just wait until I'm out of this hospital bed."
"Okay tiger I think you need to go back to sleep."
"I love you, Benson."
"I love you too, Hank."
"You know what else I love?"
"No but I have a feeling I'm about to find out."
"Your boobs."
"Oh my god," she could feel herself blushing.
"I do! Because they aren't perfectly rounded but they are so beautiful. I love watching them when you're riding me and they are bouncing. The left one is my favorite cause it's bigger and that nipple gets hard faster."
"Henry Voight!"
"What? I'm just telling you what I love."
"You are so high on pain meds right now." Olivia leaned down and pressed her lips against his. "My boobs love you too but you need to sleep now."
"Fine, fine."
It didn't take him more than a minute to fall asleep. She loved this side of him because she knew he would never say those things otherwise. It reminded her of that night in her old apartment when they had eaten pot brownies. It had immediately gone up to his head and, after eating two cheeseburgers, he had started naming all the things he found beautiful about her. He hadn't regretted it the next day but he had never been as spontaneous as that night afterwards. Until that day. It made her fall in love with him a little bit more.
"Olivia," Trudy approached her as she was leaving the doctors to run a few tests. "I've got news for you."
"All good I hope."
"Absolutely. I talked to the Commander and she approves of your transfer. She said you have to fill in all the forms, submit them, submit your papers in New York and it is a done deal."
"Are you serious?"
"I wouldn't toy with you."
"Trudy this is the best news! Thank you so much."
"I told you I would do anything for you. Hank needs you here."
"And I need to be here with him."
"I will bring you the papers later today. And, Olivia," she said as she stared walking away, "welcome home."
