It's been well over thirty minutes since Gibbs left without Tim and as Tony stands here watching his friend work through some of what he's feeling after the ordeal he's just been through, with the bag, the Senior Field Agent's cell phone rings. Looking at the caller I.D., Tony frowns but he answers it anyway. "Hey, Boss. Listen, I know you're worried about him, but he's okay."
"Tony..."
"Trust me, he's beating up the bag, he's handling things okay."
"He usin' gloves?"
"Yeah. Like I said, he's handlin' it. but..."
"Just spit it out DiNozzo."
"Boss, it's like he said in there "I treated him worse over the years than what he went through today. I need to be that bag for him right now if this is gonna do him any real sense of good."
"Call me when he's ready for a ride."
"I'm not sure when he'll be ready to come home, Boss."
"Talk to me, DiNozzo."
"He needs some time."
"Ya think?"
"Before he faces you."
"How do you know this, Tony?" The man's voice is almost sad.
"Because I saw the look on his face as he sent you away alone, Gibbs. It crushed him. And right now, as pissed as he is for everything that I pulled on him that physically hurt him worse than tonight did... the fact is - I got away with it. All of it. Just like Abby got away with pullin' all the crap she's pulled on him over the years. Maybe that's why she didn't pull that punch in Vance's office, the one that set this in motion. But, Gibbs, I promise you he'll work through it and come home to you when he's ready."
The silence on the other end of the line is loaded with emotions Tony doesn't even want to attempt to fathom. Thankfully, it doesn't last longer than a few heartbeats before Gibbs' tone still quiet and somber comes over the line. "Look after him, Tony." **Click**
Snapping his phone shut, Tony sets it down on the bench, dons the protective gear and taps Tim on the shoulder.
Stopping to grab the bag as it swings his way, Tim looks at the older man in surprise. "What are you doing here?"
"Watchin' your back, like a good team mate does, Probie. Now, c'mon, let's hit the ring."
"What...why?"
"Because I should be that bag right now and we both know it."
"Tony, no. I..."
"Spoke the truth? Need to be able to purge all of that in a good way? You're right. On both counts, so let's go. NOW, Probie!" Tony gently prods Tim towards the ring, hoping it will get the younger man moving without backing down.
He gets his wish as Tim walks to the ring and slowly steps into it, easing himself into swinging first one fist then the other in warm up moves, his breathing back under control.
'Look, Tim. I know what you're doin' and I'm happy to see ya doin' it, rather than letting it build up inside. But you and I both know that if Abby hadn't let it out in a sucker punch the way she did in there, you wouldn't be. So, do us all a favor and let this be a lesson to you, all right? Don't take any more bullshit without steppin' up for yourself! Capice? What no argument?" Tony stops baiting the hook and looks carefully at his friend. What he sees stops him cold. It's clear from the look on Tim's face that his mind isn't completely on what Tony's trying to say.
"Tim, listen. I just talked to him. He understands, well he's working on understanding that you need to work through this before you can go home to him. All right?"
Tim's head snaps up and his eyes find Tony's. "What? How would you kno...wait, you talked to him?"
"Yeah, buddy, I did. Just now as a matter of fact, when he called to check on how you're doin'."
"What exactly did you tell him, Tony?" Tim worries aloud, not giving a thought to how it makes him sound.
"What I just told you, man. That you're working through everything Abby's deliberate manipulation in the Director's Office has brought to your mind. Now, let's go, Time for round 1. Ding. Ding." Tony says loudly as he moves in to force the first move without giving Tim any more time to think about any of it. With his first punch already in motion, he knows Tim will successfully duck and come up swinging like he wants him to.
******NCIS*****
It's a good forty-five minutes of duking it out without conversation or any hint of ugliness as the punches get thrown, some harder than others, but none of them deliberately disabling or painful. Winding things down, Tim pulls his punch, steps back and begins pacing the edges of the ring, his breathing beginning to return to normal. He's not seeing anything around him yet, still trying to process everything in his head as Tony watches carefully, standing still in the center.
From the edge of his vision, Tony sees their silent witness and turns to look him straight on. When he's given the silent request to leave the rest to the newcomer, Tony bows out of the ring without a word, taking himself first to the newcomer for a moment of help out of the gloves and then off to the showers.
Realizing he's alone in the ring brings Tim up short. It's not long before he realizes he's not alone in the room, though. Finding the eyes of the man he loves watching him with nothing but concern and regret in his eyes, Tim's feet are cemented to the floor of the ring, his arms falling over the rope of the corner he's stopped in. For a long few moments, no words are spoken as their eyes do the talking.
It's clear that Tim is still trying to burn away the anger that his ordeal tonight and Abby's spiteful words afterwards has re-birthed about all that Gibbs let Tony get away with over the years. But, it's also clear that Gibbs feels very, very sorry about it and full of guilt that none of it can be made better or redone. The unspoken question that is the elephant in the room between them right now is where to go from here.
Tim looks closely at the man he's come to love with all his heart and soul. Nothing will change how he feels about him. And letting this anger for things long past that's been washing through him for the past two hours sit between them like this is not acceptable and it damned sure isn't the way to show the man that he loves him. Still, the negative emotion lingers like the dampness after a spring shower. No! It's done! It's history! It doesn't belong to us!
Sighing out loud, he wipes his face on his shirt and moves to attempt to get the gloves off. He's not completely surprised when Gibbs steps up wordlessly and takes the gloves off for him, tossing them to the bench behind the ring. Tim is completely surprised, however, when the older man gently sweeps the hair off his forehead and caresses him down the side of his sweat streaked face and speaks first.
"I am sorry, Tim. None of that should have happened or gone unpunished. I failed you."
"You're right. You did. Back then. But, not now." Tim replies quietly, looking directly back at him. A silent heartbeat later, Tim sees that his point has found its mark, so he moves things along where he needs them to go. "I need a shower." Stepping out of the ring, he heads to the shower without looking back.
******NCIS*******
Breathing out a sigh that's part frustration, part resignation, Gibbs glances at his watch as Tim moves out of his range of vision into the locker room. He knows it late, but he's surprised to find that it's after 2330. Intending to wait until Tim comes out, the older man takes himself away from the ring and over to the bench by the locker room. When a blur of movement catches his eye, he looks up from his watch to find Tony standing by him.
"It's late, Gibbs. There's nobody in the place but the three of us. He's all yours. Don't worry, I'll be right here and anyone who does come in will find the locker room's closed for maintenance."
Seeing the twinkle in his Senior Field Agent's eyes, Gibbs smirks. "Thanks, Tony. Appreciate you takin' care of him."
"You don't need to thank me, Gibbs. But I appreciate that you appreciate it. Better hurry up, water's not gonna stay hot forever in there!" Tony hassles him with humor, knowing it's probably the only time he'll ever get away with it.
******NCIS*******
Walking into the locker room, Gibbs isn't surprised to hear the water running already. Quickly shedding his clothes and grabbing two towels off the rack of them, he heads to where he'll find Tim already in the shower. Standing on the outside of the curtain, he makes the first move stepping up to the edge of the barrier between them, closest to where Tim will hear him clearly and calling out to him, using his bedroom voice. "Tim."
The body on the other side of the curtain he can see through, but not clearly, freezes before any sound is heard beyond the running water "Leroy?" Suddenly, the curtain is peeled back in the corner and Tim's head pokes out. The younger man's eyes go wide with shock when he sees that his lover is naked and waiting to be invited in. "Oh, my Go...get in here!" Tim reaches out and grabs him by the arm and yanks him into the shower, quickly yanking the curtain closed behind them.
Neither of them speaking, Tim gently prods Leroy to step under the water, the younger one's hands reaching up to wipe the water from the silver-haired one's eyes. Looking at him now, taking in every inch that is his man, the roughened, tender hands, the beautiful blue eyes that melt his heart every time he looks into them, Tim can only smile; that soft, tender smile that lets Leroy know that he feels the love from him and appreciates it, but for one reason or another, isn't comfortable accepting it at this moment.
Leroy reaches up and cards Tim's hair; that loving gesture that unites them instantly, tells both of them that love is truly in their midst, no matter what else is there with them. With his own tender smile in place, he steps closer to his lover, their inner space intertwined, but does nothing more. The first step is Tim's to take.
Only Tim knows what he needs right now. Although he's pushing the envelope on this a little, Leroy's not about to run roughshod over that. He's not happy to see his lover being to tremble, his face turning away from him, as if trying to hide what he's feeling. Now, he has to ask, his voice roughened with concern. "Tim?"
Suddenly, Tim is moving closer, straight into his arms, his quietly spoken words touching the older man's heart as it yanks a memory out in full recollection. "If you're not letting go of me..."
"Don't expect me to let go of you." Leroy finishes for him as he holds him close.
******NCIS*******
Giving the older man a good minute head start, Tony heads to the gym doors and locks them, turning the sign in the door to 'Closed". Spying paper and a pen laying over on one of the benches, he heads over and writes out the sign he needs and hurries to stick it into the windowed portion of the door.
The next order of business is turning out the lights, leaving only muted lighting by the locker room doors. Once he's taken care of that, Tony drops a clean towel from the supply of them on the ring floor and lets himself fall out. Those two will be a while and that's fine - as long as they remember that he's here. If they leave him asleep in here all night, it'll be a different story.
******NCIS*******
Countless moments later, Leroy begins to soothe his lover with long strokes of his comforting hands over his back "This was never about you feeling responsible for what happened with Abby and her plan tonight."
"No." Tim shakes his head and steps back, raising his head up so they can look into each other's eyes. "This was me being too pissed to come home."
"Tim, you don't ever have to keep that from me." Leroy chides him gently as he reaches up and strokes his face along his ear. "Nothing will ever make me let you go. We'll handle whatever comes up, together."
"Yes. I do." Tim argues softly. "I can't be that pissed at you - not there. I couldn't bring that home." Tim swallows hard as he looks down at his hands, watching himself reach out for his lover's hands. Intertwining their fingers, he looks back up at the older man. "Home is..."
"Where we love each other, through anything." Leroy defines what Tim's trying to explain. "And you didn't want our home tainted with what happened tonight."
"I don't want our home colored with my negative emotions from it, Leroy; didn't want us tainted with that." Tim clarifies quietly as he reaches behind him, picks up his body scrubber and begins slowly washing his lover, his eyes focused on what his hands are doing.
"It won't define us, Tim. But we are gonna be affected. How and how much is up to us." Leroy reminds him as he sighs blissfully into the younger man's touch. Looking into Tim's eyes, he says what's on his mind. "You had every right to be that pissed at me. Don't doubt that for a minute."
Tim stops washing the older man, his hands dropping to his sides as he takes a calming breath and looks his lover in the eye. "I don't. But it's history. Done. I want forever with you, not that past. Let me let go of it. Help me let go of it; us let go of it. Please."
Leroy swallows hard as he gently takes the scrubber from Tim's hand. Without speaking, he begins washing the younger man as both of them fall into it, the symbolic washing it all away, letting go of it and come out of things with a clean slate. It's a long, silent emotionally thick shower that leave both of them strung tight with things they can't express.
******NCIS*******
Tony's not surprised to find that's nearly an hour and a half later before the sound of Gibbs deliberately banging on some lockers wakes Tony just before the guys emerge from the locker room, silent, yet looking very much like whatever's going on, they're in it together for the long haul. Satisfied, he gives them a mock salute from where he's waiting beside the ring and lopes out of the gym, well ahead of them, leaving Tim and Gibbs in peace.
Watching the Senior Field Agent glance at them to make sure they were all right with each other enough that he could leave, Tim's face finds a small smile as he glances next at his lover. He's not entirely surprised to find the older man looking at him already. But, he is reassured by it.
Since they are still at work and it's still very much full of video surveillance, they part ways without further touching or speaking, each of them knowing full well that the next destination for them is home.
Tim deliberately hangs back once inside his own car, just long enough to let the older man lead the way home, driving right behind him as they leave the yard. He's surprised to see the direction his lover heads in because it's not to the home closest to the yard, which would be Leroy's but toward his instead.
Leroy smiles to himself as he pictures the surprise that hits Tim when he realizes where they're headed. It was a no-brainer for him, deciding to do things this way, because Tim's is further from the yard and because spending the night there together keeps the younger man reminded that this is an equal relationship in every way.
*******NCIS*********
Still too keyed up to even consider going to bed Tim takes himself over to the window, staring out at the moonlit night. His thoughts are all over the place, from the blissful memories of the heaven he and Leroy have created together in the last few weeks - to the crap filled day he's just gotten through and the reunion he'd had with Leroy, tainted by the ugly scene with Abby. He's thankful that the memory that stands out more is the time he and his lover spent in the locker room on the yard after all of that. That's another treasure for his memory books, that's for sure.
"Okay?" Leroy's tender voice in his ear, brings Tim back to the present and he lets himself lean back against the man he loves with all his heart and soul, as his lover's arms wrap around him, holding him. Laying his head back against the older man's neck, Tim snuggles closer to him, whispering his affirmative answer, but nothing more.
These quiet moments wrapped in each other's arms are what Tim loves most and he holds on to each of these moments with all that he has within him. They keep things grounded - keep their relationship from ever coming close to becoming just about sex- though Tim isn't exactly worried about that after Leroy has been patient and loving without pressuring him about anything from the beginning. Even after their intensely intimate shower earlier, he's made no move to send things between them in that direction, obviously following Tim's lead tonight.
Leroy holds Tim as tightly as he knows his lover enjoys being held, as he basks in the younger man's absolute trust in him and love for him, not to mention, his safe return. He thoroughly enjoys these quiet times of just holding each other; relishes the times Tim allows himself to snuggle against him like this, completely at ease and obviously safe and content with him. This is what makes this real for him; reaffirms for him that Tim is beginning to feel completely secure in their relationship; his rare moments of admitted uncertainty becoming even fewer by the day.
What seems like hours later, from the safety and comfort of his lover's arms still wrapped around him, Tim finally speaks to the one thing he needs to hear. "Promise me we won't ever lose this, Leroy. Please."
Wrapping his arms around his lover even tighter, Leroy answers him without hesitation speaking quietly yet firmly into his ear. "No one will ever take this from us. What we have, is ours to keep, forever, Tim." Gently turning his young man around so they can see into each other's eyes and see the truth they always see there, Leroy speaks again. "I promise." He pulls him close for a tender kiss and a gentling stroke down his face as he pulls back a fraction and quietly makes him one more promise. I've got you."
Tim smiles softly. "I know."
With private smiles on their faces as they gaze into each other's eyes, this moment, much like their future together, is indeed theirs to cherish, because nothing breaks it.
