Hold my breath, hear me out in this forest
Creatures watch as I step on their treasures
Gleaming eyes in the dark, chasing stories
Beg the earth, pay the price for redemption
-"Days" Lucia
XxxX
The temperature was cool but a warm breeze drifted by every now and then to provide comfort. The ground was soft and fertile, the corn was nearly at waist level. The crops was doing substantially better than "knee high by July" although it was not early July so maybe that was why. Birds chirped cheerfully as they flitted by overhead, somewhere off in the distance a loon called, low and mournful. Loons were such beautiful birds; black heads, red eyes, lovely black and white designs on their duck like body. Perhaps more beautiful was the low mournful wail they made. It was creepy and if you listened to it for long enough you felt like your soul was being sucked down into some sort of swirling pit of darkness. It was quite charming in a dark and sinister sort of way.
Sanji's eyes very slowly opened to all of these things and he was very confused. He sat up quickly to survey his surroundings, too quickly in fact, and he clenched his chest in pain as his vision swam. As the world became one again he became aware that he was on the edge of a cornfield. The sky was clear and a crow jumped through the corn, startling him. He felt pain all over with addition of feeling grossly damp from the morning dew.
He wasn't sure how he had turned up there. He was surprised to find that this was an experience unlike those where he had turned up in the middle of the woods before. He actually remembered what had happened this time, he remembered the tests and he remembered the doctors. He only vaguely remembered getting out and from that he only remembered seeing Zoro's upsettingly dyed hair.
But did it really happen? It was impossible to tell while he was just laying there. He felt like he was really there and everything had really happened but he had dreamed a thousand times that he was out and a thousand times he had woken up back in that cold metal chair. He shuddered just thinking of it, a panic creeping up over his spine. Best not to think about it. He lay there for a while longer, trying to decide if he was dreaming. It felt too real to be a dream, he decided but he dared not let himself hope.
He stood slowly, swaying with the effort. His body ached in protest, the skin on his chest was taunt and screaming, but he couldn't just lay there forever, he had to find a way home. He looked around for some sort of distinguishing feature. On his left a distance away he could see a road with no cars. As he turned he was dismayed to find that the only house, a small white farm house, was quite a distance from where he stood. Preparing himself for a long walk, Sanji set out toward the small home.
It took him a good forty minutes to reach the place. This was greatly due to the fact that the stitches in his chest were pulling painfully at his skin, threatening to pull him apart. Each step was a jolt of agony but it was nothing compared to the pain he had experienced when the cut was made. Quick and deep the cuts had been made, he had passed out but found no comfort in the spiraling darkness.
A large dog started barking as he approached the driveway and before he was even at the door it had opened for a short motherly looking woman who appeared on the porch. She seemed confused at the sudden appearance of this strange man in hospital clothes staggering up her driveway and Sanji granted that it was probably for good reason.
"Hello," Sanji said in as gentlemanly a manner as he could manage, "Could I use a phone, if it wouldn't be much trouble?" His voice was horse from lack of use, or maybe it was from the screaming, he didn't know.
The woman ushered him inside and showed him to a landline hurriedly. Something about him made her nervous. He couldn't blame her for that, he probably looked pretty suspicious. Sanji picked up the phone and paused. Who should he call? He could call Zeff and let him know that he was okay or he could call Zoro because he remembered seeing him the night before and he wasn't really sure what the story was with that.
"Where is this?" Sanji asked the woman, "I mean, where are we exactly?" he clarified.
"About an forty five minutes outside Sandusky," she replied, watching him suspiciously.
In that case he was closer to Zoro and he wasn't sure exactly he was supposed to proceed with his escape so he decided to call Zoro. The problem with that was he wasn't one hundred percent sure that he knew his number off the top of his head. Despite this he dialed in a number and hoped for the best.
XxxX
Zoro's phone was ringing. He jolted awake and checked the caller ID, an unknown number.
"Hello?" He said breathlessly. Please, please, please let it be Sanji and not someone threatening his life.
"Zoro?" Came the voice on the other end. It was scratchy but familiar.
"Yeah, sorry. Who is this?" he asked just to be completely positive. He couldn't allow for there to be any mistakes.
"It's Sanji, you jerk. Have I been gone so long that you've forgotten the sound of my voice?" he said sounding annoyed. Annoyed was better than missing.
"I was just making sure, you've been gone for almost a month. Where are you?" He was ecstatic that their contact had come through for them. When he had seen her drive away with Sanji in the back seat he felt like she was just going to take him away to somewhere equally horrible as the place he had just been rescued from.
Sanji gave him an address of the place he had appeared in, which he immediately plugged into his GPS.
"I'll be there as soon as possible, don't go anywhere," Zoro said, he heart aching slightly to be there with him.
"It's not like I was planning on it," Sanji scoffed, "Oh, and can you bring me some clothes, I'm in a hospital gown right now. Thank god I have pants. Also I need shoes."
He laughed, "Yeah, sure thing. See you soon," Zoro promised.
"Wait-" Zoro hung up before he could finish his thought. He worried that he might have cut off something important but it was too late now. As Zoro rushed off to his car elsewhere Sanji hung the phone back on the wall and turned to the farmer lady.
"My friend will pick me up in about forty five minutes," he explained.
The woman did not look impressed and made him go collect eggs from about seventy chickens. Despite the pain of moving he went about this task like it was nothing. This lady was helping him out, it would be rude to refuse her requests.
As he pushed open the gate carefully and stepped inside the chicken coop with a pair of boots he had been lent. Before he had been barefoot. On grass on the side of the road it wasn't so bad but he'd had to watch for broken glass.
Inside the cage the chickens clucked nervously around his feet. It was not difficult work but Sanji moved slowly and it took him some time. He pushed aside hens as they made soft clucking sounds at him and took the warm eggs from under them. What did they care? There wasn't a rooster in there, he was in another cage, which is good because roosters suck. When he got back inside he made the woman breakfast for lunch with her permission and the eggs he had collected. She seemed to like him a lot better after that. He spent the remainder of his time sitting on the porch with an old blue hound and a fluffy gray cat.
Ah, blue hounds, they made him think about Where The Red Fern Grows. That had been the only dog book he had actually liked. Usually he hated dog books because they ended up depressing and they were annoying with all their bonding moments. For some reason that book had been different and for whatever reason he had enjoyed it.
Zoro's was the only car Sanji saw on the road as he waited and his heart leaped when he saw it turn up the road. It was parked in the driveway and Zoro exited quickly, his eyes searching for Sanji. When they found him walking toward him he walked forward to meet him. He felt a vast amount of joy upon seeing the blond but kept his emotions in check while the farmer stood watching them. At least he tried. What actually happened was he ran up to Sanji and tried to squish him with his arms.
Sanji did not appear to protest at this sudden and uncharacteristic display of affection but he let out a groan of pain because he felt like he was going to split open and his guts would fall out. Zoro realized the problem immediately and stopped his squeezing, took a step back, and awkwardly cleared his throat.
"I, uh, brought some clothes," he said holding out a bag for Sanji to take.
Sanji was only just holding in his laughter. "Yeah, thanks, I think I'll go change now," he said, turning to go into the house.
After a few uncomfortable minutes of being stared at by the old woman Sanji returned in Zoro's clothes. The shirt was a little too big and the pants a little too short, but neither of these were as bad as the shoes where didn't fit at all. Sanji couldn't help that he had such petite little feet.
Before they left Sanji turned to thank the farmer very much for letting him stay there and she thanked him for the good meal, the stay was mutually beneficial. Then he followed Zoro back to the car. No words were said until they left that little country road.
"What happened?" Sanji asked, his eyes glued to the swordsman's face like he was re-memorizing it.
"You don't remember?"
"I remember what happened, but not how I got out," Sanji explained.
"I shouldn't tell you the details but we had a friend in high places pull some strings for us. We can't talk about any of this later, unless we're absolutely positive that there are no surveillance objects present. When you show up they'll be watching," Zoro promised darkly.
Sanji nodded in understanding, "What should I do when you bring me back? It's not like I can just explain all of this to the police, who I'm assuming you called at some point."
"Yep, and they did fuck all so I took matters into my own hands. I'll call the police department when we get into the city. You'll probably have to talk with some people, whatever you did last time most likely."
Sanji wrinkled his nose, he didn't want to deal with all that bullshit again.
"So, what did they do to you?"
"Oh, you know, this and that. It's not like they explained things to me, they mostly just did whatever they felt like whether I was sedated or not." He shivered slightly. He really did not want to talk about that. Everything they did was traumatizing. He wanted to section off a part of his brain so he could forget the feeling of those cold medical instruments cutting or pulling back his skin to poke around at his insides to see how he was holding up.
They had injected him with something that they were afraid to touch. It moved sluggishly through his veins like slime bringing throbbing pain as it moved. He spent days in agony as whatever they put in his body did it's job, whatever that my have been. After an indeterminable amount of crazed fever and screaming in pain the substance had gone and he was still there; sickly and weak. That's when they started to examine him. To see what the damage was. They appeared to be pleased with the results although Sanji could hardly stay lucid enough to tell what was going on.
In the present he was clenching at his arms very tightly and holding them against his body.
Zoro sent him a worried look.
"Don't look so concerned, marimo, it's throwing me off," Sanji laughed off this little episode of terror, "at least your hair is normal again though, or did I just imagine that part? Because it's entirely possible that I imagined it."
"That was real. You seemed really upset about it too," Zoro chuckled.
"I was. It made me want to cry, don't ever dye your hair again, I don't like it." It was probably mostly his brain's attempt to distract him from the magnitude of everything that had happened.
"You're such a weirdo," Zoro said with a widening smile.
Sanji rolled his eyes. "Hey, it's probably because I was abducted by the government and hypnotized into thinking I was abducted by aliens."
"Is that really what they did?" He had been wondering about that.
"I think so. I saw this guy get hypnotized once and by the end he was convinced that he had been abducted even though he was still in the building."
"That's fucking horrible."
"It makes us look crazy and if they think we're crazy then no one will listen," Sanji said sadly, "You have no idea how shitty that feels."
It was sad and true. The damned and disheartened would walk through their lives afraid to share the experience because it was so fantastically ridiculous that there was no way it was possible. And it was in fact still impossible but the existing of these thoughts led to a greater problem.
"I'm sorry," Zoro said quietly. What else could he say?
"Don't be, it's not your fault. So what are we going to do when we get back?"
"Pretend we know nothing and wait until we are no longer being monitored to move on with our lives.
"Sounds tedious."
"It will be but unfortunate there aren't many other options."
"We could always move somewhere far away, like Canada," Sanji offered. He liked Canada and he wouldn't mind living there.
"That isn't really that far away."
"Yeah, but I'm sure that in Canada they don't abduct and torture their citizens," Sanji argued.
"Fair enough."
They talked carelessly as they drove on into the city and stopped into the police department. The people investigating Sanji's case were stunned to see him.
He was put into a room with a few detectives and told to recount his story. He told nearly the same one he had told the last time he had been taken away. The detectives were shocked at the lack of information and recommended he see a shrink, which he refused to do. They also took photos of his injuries, they tried to have him get a full physical but he outright refused. Of course he really needed to go to a doctor because he was in a sufficient amount of pain and he needed a doctor to look at him so he could get heavier pain killers so the fight began.
"Sanji, listen to me," Zoro started, trying to get the blond to look at him.
The blond was tightly gripping the corner of a wall after Zoro had tried to drag him toward the doctor. They were still in the police station but a doctor had been called in so that Sanji didn't have to go into a hospital.
"I'm not going in," he said in determination, "I don't need the pain killers, I'm fine."
"No, you aren't. You have to go in there so you can get the proper treatment," Zoro growled as he tried to pry Sanji's fingers off the wall, it was much harder than it sounded.
"No!" Sanji's chest felt like it was about to tear open but he really didn't want to see another doctor ever again.
"Come on, cook, the sooner you give in the sooner we get out of here." And Zoro really wanted to get out, the officers looked uncomfortable as they watched the struggle. They wanted to help but every time they got close Sanji started screaming.
Sanji just clenched his eyes shut tighter and held on with all if his might.
"Alright, that's it." Zoro yanked his arms away from the wall with enough force to dislodge them and scooped Sanji up while he struggled. He somehow managed to carry the blond into the room where the doctor was waiting and the door was locked behind them by some friendly officers.
Once they were locked in Sanji's demeanor changed from resistance to holding onto Zoro so tightly that Zoro felt like his arm was losing blood flow.
The doctor looked understandably alarmed but he kept relatively calm. "Can you get his shirt off?" the doctor asked over Sanji's attempts to flee.
Zoro nodded and set Sanji down in a chair, carefully removing the grip on his arm. He took a deep breath and looked down at the chef critically. His eyes were wide with terror which was weird because last time he had seen a doctor he hadn't freaked out this badly and he was actually inside a hospital.
Zoro placed his hands on Sanji's shoulders and shook him once before speaking, "Hey, I need you to not freak out for like a few minutes, okay?"
Sanji looked up at him with distant and terrified eyes. "I can't do that," he said confidently.
Zoro sighed, "Just do the best you can. I know this must be hard."
Sanji swallowed hard and nodded, taking a shaky breath.
Zoro was grateful that he was sane enough to comply to that. His mania had subsided into rigid terror. Taking advantage of this Zoro pulled Sanji's shirt over his head and started to unwrap the bandages around his torso. The doctor stood on the other side of the room, trying to stay out of Sanji's line of sight.
Once the gruesome wound was revealed under the layer of gauze Chopper had placed the doctor stepped forward as Sanji shrank back against the chair. He tried to get up as he got nearer but Zoro stood behind the chair and planted his hands firmly on his shoulders.
The doctor began taking photos of the stitches for stock but soon moved on to the examination portion of this painful process. Zoro had to keep Sanji in the chair by looping his arms under his shoulders. He knelt behind the chair and talked nonsense into Sanji's ear to try distracting him from the doctor's prodding. It helped only marginally. All Sanji could think about was being opened up on the cold chair and having hands rifle through his guts, searching for something but he didn't know what. Ugh, he's head suddenly felt like it was going to explode. Blood trickled down his nose. There wasn't much blood, he was given a tissue and the bleeding soon stopped.
In truth, while he had been... Away his had stopped getting quite so many headaches and he had no nosebleeds. However, from the moment he had woken up in that field had head had been steadily throbbing with pain. There was probably a reason for that but he could not guess what it was with certainty.
The wounds appeared clean so it did not last long. As soon as the doctor wrote a prescription and walked out of the room Sanji collapsed back into the chair in exhaustion.
"Can we go now?" he asked.
Zoro nodded. "I think so."
With nothing else to go on Sanji was let go.
Zoro gave Sanji his phone to call Zeff as they exited the police station. Sanji gratefully took the phone and dialed the number. Zeff picked up immediately.
"What do you want, boy?" He barked through the receiver. Sanji smiled slightly, it was comforting that things remained the same while he was gone.
"Hey, old man, I just wanted to let you know I'm not dead or anything," Sanji said with a coy smile.
"Sanji?" Zeff asked in surprise
"Yep, I'm fine."
"Was it the same as last time?" He asked, thinking back to Sanji's horrible panic upon being found in the woods.
Sanji hesitated, "Not exactly, but I wouldn't say I'm better off now than I was then."
"So what are you going to do now?"
That was a good question, what was he going to do? He turned to Zoro, who was intently watching him.
"Hey, should I stay here or leave until we know things are okay?" Sanji asked, covering the speaker with his thumb.
"Stay for now," Zoro replied.
"I'm going to stay up here for a few days," Sanji said to the phone, "I'm not sure what after that. How's everything going? Could you ever manage without me?"
"I shaved my head but other than that fine. You better get back here soon. You haven't showed up to work in a month so don't expect any special treatment."
"Yeah, yeah, talk to you later, you old goat."
"Stay safe, little eggplant."
Sanji felt the tiniest spark of warmth at that, it nearly overcame the slight sadness that Zeff had shaved his head down again.
He handed the phone back to Zoro and crossed his arms, "Where to now?" he asked.
"Back to my place for now. Nami's sleeping, Luffy and Usopp are at work, and Brook is probably doing something important. We'll go to the bar tonight to see them."
Sanji nodded and followed Zoro to the car.
"So why aren't you at work then?" Sanji asked.
"Because you called me and I didn't show up. They know what that means."
"Right."
XxxX
Sanji was relieved when they showed up at Zoro's apartment, he didn't want to be around strangers presently. They had stopped by the drug store to pick up painkillers but he hated taking medicine so he hadn't taken any yet. Immediately he was in the kitchen looking through the food. He wanted to cook so cooking he would do, it was past lunchtime anyway and he doubted that Zoro had eaten anything. He hadn't eaten anything when he made foot for that farmer. He had felt to sick to eat anything. As he awkwardly flitted around carful of his wounds. Zoro sat up on one of the counters out of the way. It irked Sanji greatly.
"Don't sit on the god damn counter, you asshole!" Sanji said gritting his teeth.
"It's my kitchen, I can do whatever I want," he said childishly.
"But I'm the one using it so don't piss me off or I'll poison you or something."
"No you won't, you owe me for all the shit I got you out of."
Sanji groaned, "Right, I forgot. Now my soul basically belongs to you, right? I'm pretty sure that's how it works, but correct me if I'm wrong."
"That is correct, so now you have to let do whatever I want."
"You sound like a four year old, I hope you know that."
"And you have to put up with it without complaint."
"Oh, that changes things. Being your eternal servant I could tolerate but not complaining about it is a whole new level if torture. I'll pretty much explode with all my pent up rage!" he said, kicking a cabinet mildly for effect. He glared at it with malice and when he looked up again Zoro was giving him a strange look.
"What?" Sanji asked defensively.
"Nothing," Zoro said although it didn't look like nothing.
"Just fucking tell me, moss head. I promise I won't laugh," he assured although he had no intention of keeping that assurance if whatever he said was really fucking dumb.
"Nothing," Zoro said again, "I just realized how much I missed you," he said embarrassedly.
"My heart is quite literally melting right now, marimo. I can feel it." Sanji said in monotone, clenching a hand over his chest.
"Shut up! Don't mock me, asshole," Zoro huffed, sliding off the counter top.
Sanji's face twitched into a smile, "Aw, don't go," he whined, "That was really sweet."
"Fuck off," Zoro said clenching his fists.
Sanji stopped him with a hand on the shoulder and prompted him to turn around with a slight nudge. He stepped quickly into his space and pressed their lips together. Zoro was slightly reluctant at first but his lingering irritation dissipated at the prompting of Sanji's tongue.
Sanji broke away with a little hum and set their plates on the table, a cheeky little smile on his face.
"So does this mean were like an official Thing?" Sanji asked as he took a bite of his food.
"Are you asking to be my boyfriend?" Zoro asked. The word felt foreign on his tongue.
Sanji made a face, "Boyfriend makes it sound weird. I'm just saying that we should be in a relationship."
"Isn't that the same thing?"
"Yes, but minus that icky word."
"Does this mean we have to like come out to all our friends or whatever?"
"Does this mean you're saying yes?"
"I guess so," Zoro shrugged.
Sanji wrinkled his nose. "That's not the kind of reaction I wanted. You don't have to sound so resigned to it. If you hate the idea that much then just say no."
"If I hated the idea I would have told you I hated the idea and we wouldn't still be talking about it."
"Okay, good. In that case I say that if the topic comes up then we tell people, if not then we don't. It would be weird if we just suddenly announced it."
"Agreed. Any other things have have to settle on this topic, lover?"
Sanji nearly choked on his food, "Ugh, that's even more icky than boyfriend."
"Fuck you. You're the one asking me to become your sexual partner and in the same conversation using the word 'icky' like some weird little kid."
"I didn't ask you to become my sexual partner, I implied that we should begin a formal romantic relationship because our making out was getting in the way of the friendship thing we had going on."
"Then what should I say if someone asks about my relationship status?"
"Say, hands off or my boyfriend will be highly upset and, depending on how much of an asshole you are, kick your ass."
"That's kind of a mouth full."
"I was just going to finish with kick your ass but then I realized you had a pretty face and I would have to kick a lot of asses."
"You also went with boyfriend." Zoro felt indignant about the fact that his face was just called pretty but a man who was so effeminate looking it was ridiculous. Okay, he wasn't that effeminate but it was pretty bad.
"It sounds less creepy than significant other, life partner, or lover."
"Boyfriends it is then."
"Yeah, but can you not say it unless you have to because it still sound fucking stupid."
"Whatever, I don't give a shit."
Sanji rolled his eyes, shifting in pain caused by the tension of his stitches.
"Are you okay?" Zoro asked in concern, watching Sanji squirm. "I feel like you should probably take some painkillers."
"But I hate taking medicine," Sanji whined.
"Okay, but in a scale form one to ten how much pain are you in?"
"Like a seven and a half," Sanji grumbled. It was very, very painful just sitting there.
"Yeah, you're gonna have to take this." Zoro tossed him the little thing of pills.
Sanji took the recommended dose, grimacing as the pill slid down his throat. "Blah," he said, "Well, I guess on the plus side I get an even crazier scar than yours," Sanji smirked, looking at Zoro's chest like he could see through it to the scar below.
"Is that really a good thing?"
"Yeah, chicks dig scars, at least I think they do." Sanji cocked his head to the side, considering this.
"Too bad you have a boyfriend," Zoro pointed out.
Sanji hummed in agreement before laughing, "Just imagine when I'm all healed up and we go to the beach together. Well look so bad ass together." It was a funnier idea in his head than it probably would be in real life.
"Yeah, you with a big 'Y' on your chest and me with my awkward forward slash."
"You make it sound so lame."
"You really want people to constantly ask you where your scar came from?"
"I actually want the opposite of that," Sanji sighed, "Maybe I'll just wear a shirt swimming for the rest if my life."
"Whatever makes you happy, you'll have a great farmers tan by the end if the summer."
"Shut up, marimo."
They spent the rest of the day just fucking around until it was time to go to the bar. Sanji was excited to see everyone. It felt like it had been so long and in reality it had been a fairly long time.
When he and Zoro walked in they saw Usopp and Luffy already sitting at a table. Vivi was standing at the bar poring various drinks. When they saw Sanji everyone jumped up and rushed over. Luffy nearly jumped on him, sending a jolt of pain through his body. Usopp pulled Luffy back with a cry of alarm then gave Sanji a friendly clap on the shoulder for comfort. Luffy then rushed off to get Nami. Nami was dragged out but as soon as she saw Sanji a look of relief crossed her face. She pulled Sanji into a hug that turned his body to jelly. Zoro rolled his eyes at the display. Everyone wanted to know if he was okay and what he was going to do now that he was back.
"I'm fine," Sanji assured, "I think I'll just stay around here until things settle down," he said meaningfully.
"Where are you going to stay?" Asked Nami.
"With this chuckle head," Sanji said, poking Zoro in the cheek.
Nami raised an eyebrow but said nothing further on the topic. "Are you going to get a job again? I could rehire you so you can get out and around people." The underlying idea was that if he was around people no one could take him away.
"You don't have to do that," Sanji shook his head, "You have a lovely bartender now. I'll just get a job in a restaurant or something."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes, it will keep me busy during the day." And at night Zoro would be there so he wouldn't be alone.
They talked some more but everyone left fairly early. When Zoro and Sanji got home Sanji felt dead on his feet. They had stopped at CVS on their way home and picked up a toothbrush for him but tomorrow he would go get his things from the Baratie.
It was decided that because they were now together anyone sleeping on the couch was out of the question and stupid. Zoro fell asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow, Sanji was not so lucky. His brain was relentlessly swirling to areas he didn't want to think about. Around and around and around. The mundane mumbling of his inner monologue keeping him wide awake.
When he finally did fall restlessly asleep his dreams were dark and sinister. He woke twice during the night and when morning came it felt like he had hardly slept at all.
He sluggishly prepared breakfast and the two of them began the drive to Sanji's home. In the car Sanji watched the world go by in silence.
"Are you alright?" Zoro asked.
"I'm fine," Sanji said quietly although he wasn't really sure that he was. He didn't feel fine, he didn't feel bad exactly he just felt weird. A little out of body. He tried not to think about the things that had happened, the things that must have happened before that he couldn't remember. Thinking about it made his stomach churn and made him want to curl up into a ball. And they couldn't even talk about it anymore because they had no way of knowing whether or not they were being monitored.
They arrived at the Baratie with good timing and walked with purpose through those doors. The decided to go in the back so as not to disrupt business. As soon as Sanji was spotted he was overwhelmed by the various chefs squeezing him to death, which left him squirming in pain. Some of them had been there when he disappeared the first time and were very glad to see that he looked to be in better shape than that time.
Drawn out by the commotion Zeff stepped out of his office. His long chef's had covering his bald head. Zoro didn't like to see Zeff bald, it made him want to shout "BALD BALD BALD" like in the Spongebob movie, which he had only watched once because it was the only thing on tv, dammit. It wasn't even like he looked that different, only a little different. If only there were a more efficient way to get rid of cancer.
Anyway, Zeff walked out and observed the ruckus with a stoic gaze.
"I thought you were staying up there," he said, his eyes moving to Zoro briefly.
"I'm just here to get my stuff," Sanji explained.
"What, you moving in with your boyfriend now?" Patty asked, mockingly jabbing the blonde in the side.
Sanji set his jaw in a display of irritation. "Yeah, I am, so if you'll excuse us," Sanji said grabbing Zoro's hand, "we have some packing to do." He strode with purpose toward the stairs, ignoring the childish "Oooooo"s and cat calls.
They quickly ascended the stairs and entered Sanji's room, which looked like it hadn't been stepped in since he had been abducted.
"I just fucking kicked down the closet door," Sanji said happily as he started to pack away his clothes. He was speaking of the metaphorical closet, of course, not a real one. Where did this metaphor from anyway?
"Yes, you did," Zoro agreed as he stood watching Sanji pack.
"I wish I had a literal closet I could have come out of to tell them." He said glaring at his dresser, "Do you think anyone's ever done that?"
"Probably, but I think usually it's more emotional and less like a proposal, where you try to be overly spectacular."
"I guess you're right. Although, I do enjoy all those flashy proposals."
"Ugh, I can't fucking watch them. I hate proposals, I don't get them."
"What?! So if I proposed to you in an amazing and public way what would you do?"
"First of all I'd be pretty freaked out because we've only been together, like, a day. But aside from that I would probably say yes and resent you a little bit for the rest of my life. Or would say no and crush your tiny heart."
"Boo, you're so boring and privet."
"I do my best, my dear."
"If you call me that again I'll kick you all the way through the wall."
"You'd rather me call you shit cook?"
"No! Yes! Wait- I don't know. That sounds more normal so I guess so."
"You're fucking weird."
"I'm fucking awesome, is what I think you meant to say."
Zoro rolled his eyes as Sanji finished stuffing all of his things into two giant suitcases. He didn't know how long he would be staying so it was best to be prepared.
They stayed for lunch. Sanji made them make pancakes even though they weren't serving them anymore. He needed some fluffy awesomeness to comfort him in this strange time. As they were about to leave Zeff stopped them at the door.
"It's good to have you back, little eggplant," Zeff said, placing a hand on his shoulder.
Sanji suppressed a smile, "It's good to be here."
After a moment if heavy emotion they turned away from one another and stated walking away.
"Don't die while I'm gone, old man," Sanji said.
"Don't drive your stupid boyfriend crazy," Zeff retorted.
"I don't think there's any avoiding that," Zoro scoffed.
"Shut up," Sanji told him.
"You have the worst taste," Zeff commented.
"You shut up too."
And with a few more indignant shouts they parted ways. What a beautiful relationship they had.
XxxX
A/N: I just wanted to talk about loons, I don't think you would hear one in the middle of farm land. And for some reason the idea of Sanji having tiny feet is hilarious.
I have this awkward relationship conversation every story. I don't like how weird the titles sound, I don't know, it's just weird. Also, I don't really get relationships in general.
Just sneezed and feel like I'm about to pass out. Whatevah.
Thanks.
