Author's Note: The chapter you've all been waiting for… Short, but meaningful. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.


Chapter 35

I was discharged from the hospital a week later. Carlisle and Esme let me stay with my family for a while. They knew that I didn't feel like seeing Edward.

Jasper kept me company whenever I wanted it. He didn't bring up the subject, and I didn't complain.

I was slowly getting used to the fact that I'd lost my baby. It was hard living without the bump in my stomach, and knowing that I was never going to see what she would have looked like made me feel hollow.

But I remembered my new regime, and I kept my promise. I was going to move on. If I wanted to live, I had to. I'd given up on the idea of dying. Attempted suicide hadn't helped one bit. I'd done everything I could to try to deny the fact that I'd lost her. Now, I had to find a way to survive.

I spent a few days trying to prepare myself. And as I did so, I thought about what I wanted to do. If I had to move on, the first thing I wanted to do to distract myself was to start college. There was no reason that would hold me back anymore.

I didn't feel like going to Harvard or Columbia. Johns Hopkins? Not a chance. I wanted to get away from New York. I wanted to go somewhere I couldn't be reminded of my pain and loss.

Secretly, I put my plan into action. Though I knew it was late, I sent in a college application to the University of California in Los Angeles. I'd decided on what I wanted to be, and UCLA had a wonderful medical program.

To my surprise, they replied quickly. With my grades and accomplishments, they had agreed to accept me as their pre-med student.

I sighed in relief as I closed the letter. That was settled then. I would be attending UCLA this coming fall. That left one last thing on my list.

"Are you going somewhere?" Renee asked when she saw me coming down the stairs, dressed.

"I need some air," I mumbled.

"Are you going to be okay by yourself?"

I nodded briefly before exiting the house. I was going to be okay after today.


"Hi, Bella," Emmett greeted me at the door. "I thought you were staying at your parents' house."

"I am," I said quietly. "I'm only here to get my things."

They all became silent as they understood the meaning of my words.

"You're not really going to…?" Alice trailed off. "Bella!"

"Is he here?" I asked, ignoring her.

"He'll be back soon," Carlisle said after a while. "He said he needed some fresh air."

I moved toward the stairs. "I'll wait."

I busied myself in packing my suitcase. I didn't pack anything that would remind me of him. I was leaving to start over. I was going to forget about him.

I set the suitcase by the door after I'd finished. I sat down slowly in an armchair to wait for him.

Edward's Point of View

The sight of her Audi made me stop in my tracks. She was here. And I had a hunch on why.

"Bella's waiting for you," Emmett said morosely as soon as I had walked in the door.

Alice grabbed my arm. "You can stop her, Edward. You have to say no! You have to refuse to give her what she wants!"

I pushed her away gently and started up the staircase. I might as well see what I was getting myself into.

I pushed the door open and walked in slowly. She was sitting on the armchair, staring into nothing.

I approached her, taking my time. I stopped and waited.

A few seconds passed. Finally, she took out a huge envelope and set it on the table next to her. She didn't say anything.

Swallowing hard, I took the envelope and took out the documents inside. My hands started to shake when I saw what it was.

I looked back at her. "Bella…" My voice shook too.

"Sign it," Bella said quietly.

I had known that this was coming. I had known that it was a possibility. But she really was here, asking me to sign the divorce papers.

"Bella…" I pleaded. "Please. I'll do anything…but not this."

"Please sign it, Edward," Bella whispered. "I can't do this anymore. I don't think I can live with you. Not after…not after everything that's happened."

I felt as though my heart was ripping into pieces. There were so many things I would have given her willingly…and a divorce was what she wanted.

"Bella," I whispered, falling to my knees. "I…I can't…"

"Please, Edward," Bella said, finally looking at me. She looked just as miserable as I was. "Do it. For me. If what you really claimed was true, if you truly love me, do it."

"Why?" I asked desperately. "There were so many things I wanted to give to you, Bella. Why do you want this?"

"Because I want to live," she whispered. "I have to survive. I have to move on. And if you're around…I don't think I can ever do that."

"Don't ask me to do this, Bella. Please."

"I can't do this anymore," Bella said, shaking her head. "I can't pretend that nothing happened between us. Something did happen. Something big. And it's obvious that it's breaking us both apart."

"I still love you, Bella," I said softly. "I love you. How do you expect me to just sign this?"

"Do it for me," she said. "I have to move on. I have to live."

I just stared at her. This was what she really wanted. I could see it in her eyes. She wanted it.

But how could I give it to her? She was my life. I could never love anyone else but her. I was positive I could regain her trust if I had the chance.

Maybe she was able to see that I wasn't going to give in easily. Because suddenly, she looked determined, and she looked at me coldly.

"I don't want to live with you anymore," Bella stated clearly. "You'll only stand in my way. I don't…" She took a deep breath. "I don't love you anymore."

Her words pierced through my heart. It hurt more than I cared to admit.

"You don't…love me?" I breathed.

"No."

I knew she was doing this to make me sign it. She knew it was the only way to convince me. And she was right.

She was lying. I knew it. She still loved me. I could see it. But she was also determined to move on. Without me.

And how could I hold her back…when I didn't deserve to anymore?

I closed my eyes briefly before reopening them. "If…if this is what you…what you want."

"It is."

Slowly, I took the pen she offered me. Laying the papers flat on the table, I signed my name on the appropriate line. And just like that, the divorce papers were ready.

I stared at it, feeling numb. Why… How could I do this? I still loved her. Yet…I was letting her go.

Bella slid the papers back in the envelope and rose. "I'll try to settle this as quickly as possible. It'll be better for both of us." She walked away, then paused.

She walked back slowly and stopped in front of me. And she took off the double rings from her left hand and placed it on the table.

"I'm sorry, Edward," she said quietly. She walked away again, this time without another glance. She picked up her suitcase and left our bedroom.

I felt like I couldn't breathe. The pain in my chest was growing. I stared at the rings I'd given her when I'd proposed.

Alice suddenly burst into the room. She started punching every inch of me. She was crying again. "How could you sign it? Why did you do it? Why, why, why?" She fell on the floor next to me, sobbing her heart out. "Edward…why…?"

Emmett, Carlisle, and Esme were at the doorway, watching us. I heard Esme crying quietly as well.

"How could I refuse?" I asked quietly, feeling hollow. I was still staring at the rings blankly. "This is all I can do for her now. I don't deserve to hold her back."

I heard the Audi driving away. And as a single tear spilled over and streaked down my cheek silently, I knew this was reality. It was really happening to me.

The love of my life was gone.


AN: I wanted Edward to feel the pain of the "I don't love you anymore" so I made Bella say it in my story. I was pretty proud of it, if I do say so myself. I hope you didn't need a tissue or anything. Hee. =)

Also, I'm starting a new story. For those of you who follow all my stories, you've probably read this notice numerous times already, so you might be tired of it. But for those of you who only read this story, I'm letting you know that my new story had been driving me crazy for a while, and I had to write it down. The title is not decided yet, so I'll let you know on my next updates. I hope you'll all go read the first chapter!