There was always something uncomfortable about threatening an asari.
Galactic perception of the people was very thorough - peacekeepers, diplomats, wise and "good". It was an image cultivated and promoted by the asari themselves, and most other species who saw their race as one to aspire to.
There was certainly a lot of truth in it. But Shepard had fought in the darkest corners of the galaxy long enough to know that everybody was represented there.
And whilst it was rare that she fought them, leaving her inevitably uncomfortable, one thing was always true. Asari were not easy prey.
Aethyta did not hesitate when Faith raised her gun. Lighting up with biotics, lightning fast, a hand flickered up and slapped pistol out of her grip, the other blasting Shepard from her feet with a brutal wave of energy, sending her crashing onto a small table and landing in a pile of shattered glass, shards of decorative metal and splintered wood.
She scowled at the stabbing pain in her back, but before Aethyta had taken a second step into the house Faith lashed out with a foot, catching the asari in her knee and forcing her to stumble, biotics flickering.
Biotics need focus, co-ordinated muscle movements, keep them off guard.
What seemed like an ancient voice; one of her old drill instructors, ran through her mind, and with an angry snarl her hand curled over a fistful of broken glass and debris - slashing her palm with a distant pain - which she dashed at the asari's face, instinct causing the alien to bring a defensive hand up, biotics totally dropping at the distraction.
Faith did not stop to consider what Aethyta was doing here. The instincts of a soldier would not allow it; Aethyta had engaged hostility, which made her an enemy. She was a threat to Liara, and a second's hesitation would mean disaster.
Following her handful-of-debris distraction, Faith leapt to her feet and seized the back of the asari's neck with her bloody hand. With a yank, she pulled the alien's head down and toward her even as the other fist surged upward into Aethyta's chin. The asari's head snapped backward, sending her backpedaling senselessly into a richly decorated couch - toppling it over as it fell with her.
Not pausing in her momentum, Shepard hurdled over the furniture, booted foot coming down hard on the asari's arm, causing her to bark in pain. Faith answered with a furious growl, and the boot came back up high, fully intending to stomp back down on Aethyta's throat...
When the asari, with deft grace, caught Faith's foot, briefly flared in blue light and threw the soldier into the opposite wall. Faith crashed into the hard wall before hitting the floor back-first - showered by the wreck of a decorative painting - driving her breath and senses from her.
No!
Through muscle memory alone, she rolled to her feet before the thought even occured to do so - and, after shaking her head clear, regarded the asari who was also rising unsteadily, biotics freshly aglow.
Not allowing her the chance, Faith again charged in, launching a rapid series of punches that forced the asari back; most landing on her increasingly bruised face, swelling both eyes, forcing her backwards... though she did not go down, eventually lowering her head and dove in, wrapping her arms around Faith's shoulders, turning the brawl into a mad wrestle.
She was strong!
Faith tried to grapple her to the floor, expecting an easy win - asari were usually physically weak, relying on biotics or weapons rather than brute force.
But Aethyta seemed perfectly at home with dirty fighting, driving a knee up into Faith's stomach as she pushed, slamming both into the wall, the sound of destroyed furniture seeming far away in the face of the threat.
With another angry hiss Faith felt that intoxicating rush of power that seemed to pulse when she was fighting, lowering her head and heaving the asari into the far wall. Instantly pressing her advantage Shepard attacked, launching machine gun jabs into the alien's stomach. In the background, an absurdly cheerful tone sounding as a sensor was accidentally activated which opened a side door into another section of the house.
Shepard pulled back for a moment, peripheral vision noting a statue she could use as a weapon-
When Aethyta, face bloodied and torn into a mask of rage, slammed her forehead into Faith's nose.
A nova exploded in the centre of her face, blinding as her vision flashed bright white.
Surprised by the brutal attack, Faith stumbled backwards, feeling the asari gain confidence, a brutal kick to the gut launching her into the newly opened room, again toppling her to the floor, tearing down a hanging tapestry depicting Athame in a loving embrace with another asari.
Coughing, feeling blood run across her lips from her foe's unexpected assault, Faith grabbed the bar from which the now tattered tapestry once hung and scrambled across the room on all fours...
When she felt a massive weight land on her back, forcing her to the floor again.
She's like a damned krogan!
It wasn't often Faith fought a fighter like... well... herself. It took a certain brutality to fight in unarmed melee with the intent to really hurt an opponent, that not many people had. Batarians - monsters - seemed to manage it no problem, krogan could...
But as tough as she was, the asari's movements were growing sluggish from the beatings she had taken. Faith had no trouble bucking the woman from her back, swinging the bar around in a hope to do at least some damage before she could get a decent position for a more deadly blow.
The angle was awkward, the bar barely grazing Aethyta, but it hit directly in the temple, sending the asari sprawling backwards, smashing yet another table.
Seeing her opportunity, Faith stumbled to her feet, managing to knock over a lamp as she gained her balance.
Aethyta was lying on her back, clutching her head, groaning.
Still gripping the heavy bar, scraps of an ancient piece of artwork hanging from its length, Faith stalked across the room, anger pulsing through her. It was unlikely Aethyta would be able to use her biotics after such a head wound, and she had already sensed the matriarch was tiring.
Just as she reached the asari, Aethyta blinked - rage clearing from her eyes - then instantly raised her hands, face already starting to puff up as she lay on the wrecked table.
'Wait! Wait!'
Faith paused above her, blood-pounding battle-rage replaced by something she recognised in herself... much more deadly than anger. That cold, ruthless, emptiness, that would dictate this asari could and would die without a regret if Faith decided it.
She scowled and spat a mouthful of blood that had flowed down from her smashed nose onto the floor, speaking harshly. 'No sudden moves. Why are you here?'
'I'm not here to fight!'
Faith raised an eyebrow. 'You attacked me the second you walked in here.'
Aethyta gave a tiny cough, blood dripping from her lips. She slowly pulled herself into a seated position, each move carefully monitored by Faith.
'I'd say it was-' Another cough, 'self defence... but I'm in no position to argue.' She gestured to a bag slung across her shoulder. 'May I?'
Faith nodded, on edge, ready to strike out with her bar if she tried anything.
Slowly, Aethyta slowly out... a bottle?
'Ah... want a drink, Shepard?'
'She asked you to go back?'
'No, not to them. She said she knows someb...body else who is exploring indoctrination, and that I could help.'
Goddess... the faltered word strikes like a piercing blade, that knowledge that this is all my fault...
When I first saw Shiala limp on her cane, heard her stutter, a true wave of guilt and shame washed over me for my cowardice in how I treated her, unable to tell her that she did not have to subject herself to those horrible tests, because at some deep, cold, calculating level I knew that if she could help us understand indoctrination, some good might yet come of her suffering.
And yet, I was unable even to reassure her of that. Unable to offer her whatever she needed as she subjected herself to the experiments, unable to justify myself, and instead wallowed in indecision, leading to... this.
Coward...
And Faith wants her to return.
I can see the reasoning behind her request, I truly can, but whenever something like this happens I am reminded that, as much as she has changed, at her core lies something that allows her to look suffering in the eye, and somehow not just accept but justify it, if there is a greater good to be had.
I know that she fels empathy, compassion and regret for it all; I have seen the feelings, even felt them, so strong at times I want to weep. But whether it is something innately part of her, or has been beaten into her the tragedies she has endured, she can see past it.
It is something I simply cannot do, or justify to myself.
And the most sickening part is, I know with disgusting certainty, that it is something we will need during the Reaper war.
And yet... in my work such actions - if not exactly like this then at least comparable - are carried out at my will. People suffer and die, so more still can live.
But I am distanced from it, and do not have to see it myself.
I see numbers, text on a screen, hear disembodied voices run through distorters.
And that is easier.
I do not think I could not look those people in the eye and make the same request.
I do not see the results of my actions, standing before me as Shiala is now.
Does that make me worse?
But I trust that Faith made the right decision. That she has a plan beyond simply subjecting Shiala to such disgusting violation.
She has to.
Looking at Shiala, hobbling slowly along the path...
I could not ask that of her. My friend and mentor, who was at times more a mother to me than Benezia herself.
How much will this war cost us?
She looks at me, with sickly green eyes, and gives a pallid smile that stabs another pang of guilt deep into my stomach. Swallowing down a rush of uncomfortable remorse, I return a soft smile.
'Don't worry about me, Liara. I told her I would think ab...b...bout it.'
I reach over, and touch her free hand. 'Whatever you decide, Shiala, know that this time I will not abandon you. Whatever you need, I... Faith and I will ensure you get it.'
Her smile turns at once sad and reassuring. 'You didn't abandon me, Liara, I asked something of you that I knew you could not give.'
I am not sure I believe her. Or... or that she could believe that herself. 'Still, I apolo-'
'Enough, girl!' A hint of that devious humour I know forms a core of her personality shines through with the words, drawing an involuntary smile across my own face as she continues. 'I'll hear no more of it from you. Not until we've cleared your mother's name, at least.'
After a second, I nod. 'Very well.'
Looking around the calm grounds, the evening twilight casting the familiar sights in delicate hues of blue and purple, a sense of peace descends across us.
Matriarch Rania spent most of the day excitedly informing me - and Shiala who also attended - of the investments and changes she made to the estate. For the most part she kept things as they were under mother's guidance, though she has opened up many of the educational programs held here to accommodate more young maidens who wish to spend their youths in a manner more productive than the usual mercenary or bar work, something she correctly assumed I would support given my own path.
'Liara?' Shiala's anxious voice breaks my contemplation, and I follow her pointed finger to our living quarters.
The door is open.
Immediately both of us falter, suspicious. It is far too cold for Faith to have left the door open on purpose.
My heart begins to hammer into my chest in panic.
No, she must be well, maybe the door is broken, or... or...
At an unspoken command we approach slowly, silently, Shiala surprisingly light on her feet considering her ailment.
Goddess, please, let her be ok!
The sight through the door has me gasp quietly. A small table is broken on the floor, and the tight space of the entrance gives the general impression of a fight having taken place.
I cannot lose her, not now, not like this!
Both Shiala and I light up with biotics, though I see Shiala's sparking brightly at the tips of her body, indicating the lack of control she mentioned. Before I can say anything, she scowls at herself, light fading, and pulls out a small pistol with her free hand. I would rather she not risk herself at all, but if somebody came for Faith, and actually managed to best her in combat, I will need all the help I can get.
A quiet tinkling sound, of a dropped glass not breaking, sounds from beyond one of the two doors in the room.
Nodding at Shiala, who is already making her way to that door, we prepare ourselves.
Please, let this just be an accident, or... anything!
The door opens before us.
We spin in and-
What?!
I... did not expect this...
Faith and... is that Matriarch Aethyta?... are sitting on the floor, at opposite ends of a broken table, an unmarked bottle of liquor sitting upon it and each with a small glass in their hand... staring at each other.
My breath catches at the state they are in - Faith's nose looks twice its normal size, ugly purple markings blotching her skin. Aethyta, on the other hand, looks as though somebody hit her in the face with a biotic warp... what... what is happening?
Two pairs of eyes look up - Goddess, what happened to them!? - and immediately fill with an identical embarrassment.
From my side, a shocked whisper sounds, barely registering in the face of the sight before me. 'You?'
Both mouths open at once, then after a second, they speak together.
'...I can explain.'
'...I can explain,' Faith blurted out, suddenly realising the absolutely ridiculous nature of the situation she was in.
She glanced around the room, noticing as if for the first time that a fair amount of furniture had been destroyed or knocked over. There was one empty bottle of whatever foul substance the pair had been consuming lying on the floor, and another half-empty on the table between her and Aethyta.
She put down the glass in her hand, careful not to spill any of its contents... not like that would particularly matter if she made a mess, considering the shattered table currently had no legs and the top was sitting directly on the floor.
As were she and the asari opposite her.
The matriarch, for her part, looked rather pleased with herself, leaning back and tossing back her drink in one with a wide grin across her face.
God, this is embarrassing...
Faith stood up, and quickly crossed to Liara, wondering how the hell she was going to explain a trashed house and strange asari in the living room.
Liara looked absolutely mortified.
'Faith... what...' her head tilted to look at Aethyta. 'Is that...?'
'I can explain,' Faith said again, as if it would help.
'I can't wait to hear this.' Shiala, standing behind Liara, said with an amused but cautious grin as she holstered a pistol, eyes never leaving Aethyta.
Does she know?
Faith took a breath, and gestured back to the asari still sitting comfortably on the floor, deciding the direct approach would be best. 'This... is Aethyta. She showed up here a couple of hours ago. We... ah... talked, and she's... well...' She drew in another breath, and took one of Liara's hands, catching her concerned eyes. 'She's your sire.'
'I told you, dickbag, it's father.' Aethyta prompted with a scowl.
'Sire,' Faith repeated more forcefully. No matter how many times Aethyta had explained it, father was a male term, and it just felt weird to call a female by the word. Sire wasn't much better, but it felt at least a little more natural to her.
She looked at Liara, concerned about the reaction. With all that had been going on with Benezia, the revelation would surely-
'I know.'
Three surprised faces turned to the maiden, whose own face was unreadable... if still a little bemused at the whole situation.
'You...' Faith began, then sighed. 'Of course you do.'
Liara nodded, looking unsurprised. 'I am an information broker, Faith, and not an entirely poor one. I noticed that she would pay close attention to me whenever I visited her bar on Illium. I... I could not simply assume her interest was harmless.' She tilted her head. 'Though... why have you come here now? Surely your spying would be easier done from a distance?'
The matriarch's face was twisted into frustration as she shrugged. 'You know babe, nobody likes a know-it-all.'
'I am not a...' Liara dropped her head, pinching the bridge of her nose, then looked around. 'Goddess Faith, what happened here?'
Shepard winced, very aware of just how bad things looked. 'I... ah... didn't trust Aethyta's motivations. The last time I saw her she was bartending on Illium, then she just showed up a couple of hours ago.'
A pleasant chime echoed through the room as Aethyta tapped the side of the bottle with her glass. 'Hey, I brought booze!'
Frowning, Faith ignored her and continued. 'With all that's been going on, I decided caution was the best option.'
'You stuck a gun in my face, soldier girl. That's a bit more than caution.'
Liara's eyes widened, and Faith scowled at the floor, feeling slightly ashamed. She had been on edge from her call with Aria, and was expecting Liara... her reaction was probably a little over the top, but with all the warnings she was receiving about the unusual nature of asari politics and courts, she did not think it was totally unreasonable. Plus, Aethyta had thrown the first punch. 'I wasn't going to risk anything. Anyway, we... argued.'
'At which point you destroyed the house?' Liara prompted.
'It's not...' Faith glanced around again and decided denial was useless. 'Erm... maybe a little bit. I'm really sorry Liara, I think I can fix most of this...'
The asari shook her head. 'I am not concerned about the furniture, Faith, I...'
She reached out and gently touched Faith's very tender nose, voice softening. 'Are you ok? I was worried...'
Faith closed her eyes, leaning into the delicate touch. What did I do to deserve her? 'I'm really sorry Liara, things got a bit... out of control. I didn't mean to worry you.'
A loud and obvious throat clearing from the floor snapped the lovers from their daze. Glancing over to Aethyta, Faith noticed she looked amused, despite having both eyes heavily bruised, one lip split and a cut across her forehead that was caked in dry blood. 'Admiring my handiwork kiddo? Nothin' like a Tuchanka kiss when you're in a pinch.'
With an angry glare at Aethyta, Faith again felt her nose throb painfully. The brawl had been bad enough, but after the ex-bartender had produced the bottle, things had steadily gotten more... strange, cautious drinking leading to questions... and anger.
'You did not answer my question.' Liara said quietly but with a voice full of steel, staring at Aethyta. 'Why did you come here?'
For the first time, Aethyta actually looked uncomfortable, closing her eyes and drawing in a deep breath. Eventually she stood up and crossed to Liara, all traces of mirth gone from her face.
'Look kid, I know... hell, your girlfriend made it very clear that I've got no right to be here.' She glanced to Shiala, who had taken a seat on one of the few intact chairs, resting her leg. 'I'm glad you came though, didn't think my message got through...'
Faith cleared her throat expectantly. Though the hot, uncontrolled anger drawn from suspicion had faded when they stopped fighting, when Aethyta had explained her real motivations it had been replaced by a much more dangerous, icy rage that Aethyta had hidden herself from Liara for so long, spied on her, and only now wanted to come and reclaim some of the responsibility that should have been hers for the last century.
She had never been there for Liara, when her mother had pushed her away, when she had become ever more isolated in her work, when she had been alone after Shepard's... death... when she had almost lost herself on Illium... instead Aethyta had sat back, and watched.
Faith's fists curled into themselves in anger again. She had decided to give Aethyta a chance to explain herself to Liara at least, to see if her explanation was any more satisfactory. As poor a parent as Aethyta was, Faith had no right to deny Liara the chance to even know her.
Aethyta grimaced. 'Yeeeah. I... was supposed to do the same thing I've done for the past few years. Keep an eye on you from a distance, you know, let them know if anything weird happened. But...'
She shook her head in frustration, then jerked her thumb in Faith's direction. 'She's right. I've been a crappy father, if I even deserve that title. I want to make it up to you, kiddo. That's all there is to it. The matriarchs can shove their covert plans right up their prissy little asses, I'm not going to let Nezzy's name get dragged through the dirt, let you lose what's rightfully yours.'
The matriarch glanced between the three other faces in the room, judging the icy expressions on all of them before swallowing. 'But it seems like you've known who I am for a while now, so I'll leave it up to you if you believe me. Say the word, and I'll see myself out. I'll go back to pretending to spy on you, you go back to pretending not to notice and the matriarchs go back to pretending they could ever actually get to you if they wanted.'
With a small smirk, Aethyta pointedly glanced at the soldier and rubbed her puffed up, bruised lip.
Note to self: don't let Liara out of sight on this planet...
Faith took Liara's hand again, pain shooting through her hand as the damaged skin across her sore knuckles split, but not letting it touch her features... while the maiden's face creased into uncertainty.
Faith knew it would be safer to make Aethyta leave, but she was Liara's family... possibly the only direct relative she had, even if asari saw the relationship slightly differently than a human would. If she could give Liara even the smallest amount of that happiness a family could give, then was it worth it? Worth forgiving the years and years of not just neglect, but also active work in involving herself in Liara's life, yet never revealing herself?
It... was not Faith's decision to make. She would support Liara in whatever she chose to do, just as Liara did for her.
'I...' Liara began slowly, looking to Faith, her beautiful eyes still uncertain.
Could I say no to knowing any of my family again, however they neglected me?
Aethyta did sound so genuinely regretful about her part, never refuting Faith's accusations, simply trying her best to justify them with excuses that she could tell the asari herself was not satisfied with.
It's not my decision...
But it was a decision that Liara clearly wanted to share with her, and in the asari's eyes Faith could see that open trust between them... and she was reminded as to how their lives had come together, on the tight family that was the crew of the Normandy, the men and women Faith had brought together and led through tragedy and victory alike... that family she had welcomed Liara into not once but twice now.
She wants me to be part of this decision... part of her family...
Faith knew what to do.
With a small, reassuring smile, she looked deep into Liara's gaze... and nodded.
Liara immediately nodded back in return, warm smile on her face and relief in her eyes.
Turning together back to Aethyta, who actually looked nervous, andLiara made the announcement. 'Okay... you can stay.'
Aethyta's face cracked into a truly honest, open smile that despite everything, lifted Faith's spirits, filling her with a hope that the decision might bring Liara happiness. For all Aethyta's actions, that was a smile that came from the heart, and at some level Faith understood, to be accepted by family. After a few seconds, that emotional smile shifted into something more devious, and she hefted the bag still slung across her shoulder, causing it to jingle pleasantly.
She has more?!
'I don't know about anyone else, but I think I need a drink!'
'So... I suppose you've got questions.'
Questions...
I have many.
Enough to fill the entire evening.
Questions for everybody in the room.
Even for Shiala. She knew Aethyta. She knew she was my father... why did she not tell me? Goddess... they even met, when Shiala and I visited her bar together on Illium!
How many people... how many friends and teachers, have known and not told me?
Biting back the nauseous feeling rising up, I glance over to see her and Faith across the room... the pair practising what appear to be martial arts that Shiala can readily perform with her injury.
My love...
I want nothing more than to just... forget... all of this, just for a moment, to melt into her arms and feel that safety only she can give me, knowing she will not judge, will not demand anything from me...
But I cannot. Not yet.
Faith has given me some privacy with Aethyta, and I need to know... what?
Could I ask about her? Why she left me as a newborn? Why she stayed away? What she is like as a person, beneath the gruff and humorous exterior?
Could I ask about her work? Spying on me, for the asari government? Why she would take a job like that... and why would she carry it out, not telling me?
I look at her battered face, quirked in curiosity. She does not seem to be in any pain, though she has consumed a significant amount of alcohol.
She is my father. The one who loved Benezia enough to risk the shame that could be heaped upon them both by siring a pureblood child.
She... does not look like me.
Did I expect her to? That is not how asari reproduction works, she was just the map for randomising my genes, there is technically nothing of her in me, though if that were truly the case then surely the stigma of pure asari unions would not be so great...
I shake my head, then sip at the glass Aethyta offered me.
Goddess, this is foul!
She gives a wan smile at my expression, nervous in a manner most unlike the brash bartender I thought I knew. So many questions...
Questions...
'Why is the asari government watching me?'
Oh...
I did not mean to ask that, but I have been curious as to their exact motivations... is this drink stronger than I thought?
Aethyta scowls, and drinks down her entire glass in one mouthful. 'Good question. Short answer, it's 'cos they're a bunch of idiots. I've seen what you've been up to. Seen that Reaper shit your girlfriend sent out. Seems to me like they should be listenin' to you, but instead they sent me to keep an eye on you.'
She refills her glass, and looks at it in distaste. I know that the government is worried about me, but I still cannot understand why...
'Look, there's something you're gonna find out pretty soon, but I might as well be the first one to tell you. Consider it my fatherly duty, or whatever.'
Fatherly duty... the words sound so strange. She is my father... my family. I have had friends, since mother and I grew apart, some so close that they are family in all but blood. But to know that she is truly my parent, and that she is offering the kind of knowledge parents give their children...
It is warming, in a way I know it should not be. She is a practical stranger to me, and although Faith is busy I can still see that she is keeping a cautious eye on Aethyta, not trusting her yet... quite rightly.
And yet, it is still warming.
'You might think the asari are a clever bunch. And you'd be right. We've managed to shape the galaxy for the better in more ways than one, and frankly the others would be lost without us.'
She looks into her glass, reflection swimming in the pale blue liquid.
'But don't for one second believe that somehow that makes us better. Truth is, I was sent to watch you because they're terrified. You think we're the big, open, democratic society that everybody else wants to be?'
I nod, slowly. What is she getting at?
'And you're a damned information broker, with dirt on more people than I want to know about. That's how thorough it is. I was sent to watch you because any asari out there who looks like she's rocking the boat, gets put under surveillance. Mostly it's just tiny stuff, a few matriarchs on a planet keeping an eye on the thousands of maidens and matrons who are turning into merc leaders, becoming business executives, whatever. No way in hell we could keep track of everybody, and we don't want to. But you...'
She shakes her head again. 'Daughter of one of our most influential matriarchs, suddenly on a Spectre's crew, saving the Citadel... then somehow pulling yourself up the ranks on Illium faster than just about anyone they can remember, always at the centre of pretty fundamental shifts. Too many people preparing for war, with you behind it. So they send me to decide if you're dangerous.'
What!?
'I am preparing the galaxy for the Reapers! How could they think I...' I shake my head angrily. 'Goddess, what possible danger could I be?'
Aethyta snorts. 'You've got no idea. I've had to deter them from assassination twice just because they thought you gave the asari a bad reputation, never mind these plans you seem to be behind.'
'Y... you...'
'Yeah, I stopped 'em. Not gonna let you be another victim of the asari government's bloodsoaked campaign of making our species look good.'
'What do you mean?'
'Kid, they'd have you killed in a second if they believed the galaxy thought less of the asari as a whole because of you. Same with any asari out there.'
My mind runs blank. I knew there were surveillance activities, of course, but that they would so readily kill our own people just for that...
'Anybody?' The quiet word slips through my lips... how many asari have died because of this?
So many people die for so many reasons: war, accident, disease and more, but for an asari to die because her own government decides her an inconvenience?
Aethyta hums in agreement. 'More than you want to know.'
Faith and Shiala - sparring now concluded - have come to stand nearby, listening politely. Suddenly frowning, Faith speaks coldly. 'I don't buy it. What about someone like Aria T'Loak? Surely she's much worse than Liara?'
Father... can I call her that?... snorts again. 'I'm not saying they stop people from doing nasty stuff, human. I'm saying they stop people from making the asari look bad. When somebody says Aria, what do you think?'
'Criminal.' Faith replies instantly.
'Use your brain!' Aethyta snaps in return. 'Smart. Beautiful. Deadly. Ruthless. You think shit like that, right?'
Faith nods slowly.
'And who benefits from that? She does, obviously... but it means every time somebody looks at an asari, they see a little blue girl. Maybe she's cute. Maybe she's got brains, maybe she's waving her ass on a pole. Maybe some idiot thinks they can take advantage of her. But there's this little voice at the back of their mind telling them that Aria is a little blue girl just like her, and Aria would turn their skin inside out, slaughter their family and sell their kids into slavery if she decided she didn't like how they looked. Suddenly, that little blue girl's a lot more scary. Get me?'
Could they be so ruthless? Allow such a disgusting criminal to continue her activities because she is good for our reputation?
Faith nods again, this time in understanding. 'I suppose that makes sense. She might be a criminal, but she makes the asari look stronger, so they allow her.'
'Exactly,' Aethyta replies with a scowl. 'Fucking stupid if you ask me... which you did. So we keep ourselves on top like that. Make sure we're always the peacekeepers, but let everybody know that if they fuck with us, they're dead. Probably shouldn't be tellin' you this Shepard, but I'm too old to care about protocol and you need to know if you're gonna help Liara.'
'W...' This is all so much, I knew the asari government monitored people: that is why mother is on trial, after all, but that they are so callous about simply killing those who they think a threat... who are they to decide that?! 'W... what about mother?'
'The trial you mean?'
I nod wanly. I knew there would be a political element to the trial, but so much... could we even influence the outcome?
'They want to make a big show of it, to make sure the galaxy's watching them talk about how one of our best managed to turn rogue. But worst of all, the ones prosecuting her are thinking about themselves as well, even with all the other shit. They're on the lookout for the asari as a whole, but damned if that'll have them working together. They all want a piece of what's rightly yours, kid, so watch out. Some of 'em might get it by having Nezzy's name dragged through the dirt. Others, her old supporters, will get it by makin' sure she's acquitted so their own reputations aren't hurt by association.'
This is all too much... mother... Shiala... now my father...
And now I learn that I cannot even expect a fair trial?
Faith voices my concerns from her position behind me, one hand resting reassuringly on my shoulder. 'Does that mean our presence here isn't going to change anything?'
With a shrug Aethyta replies, looking genuinely apologetic. 'Sorry babe, I'd tell you if I knew. But I'll tell you this. It's weird enough that they're doing this now, just after that bombshell you dropped on the galaxy, which tells me that they're up to something. I've got no idea what it is though... and I'm not sure I'll be able to get it out of them after meeting you like this.'
Faith sits down beside me, close, warm leg pressing against mine as Aethyta continues. 'But they're ok with the pair of you being here, otherwise you'd be dead in a ditch somewhere, so I'm guessing they want you to speak for Nezzy. And if they're allowing that, it means you will have the chance to sway them. We're still a democracy, however much of a sham it's got underneath. If you put the better case and the prosecutors still decide to say Benezia was guilty, they'll lose their credibility.'
An uncomfortable silence drags out.
This is all so much to process... I thought I would be protecting mother's name... perhaps finally allowing myself space to grieve... I did not want to get caught in the middle of an argument that has so little to do with her and her actions!
A warm hand takes mine, skin rough but the touch as soft as ever... reassuring.
Thank you for being here...
I do not know what to say.
This asari, my sire, has just told me more about how my people truly operate than over a century of living has shown me.
Was I so naive?
I knew that we are by no means the paragons of virtue many see us as, but I at least thought we strived for it, rather than simply pretending as the dirty truth was actively hidden by those supposed to be wise...
'Sorry kid, I probably should have eased you into that...' Aethyta's voice is a distant echo, and I wonder-
No.
The information... hearing it like that, without any embellishment, was shocking... but not unknown. I knew nearly all of what she said as truth already, but simply refused to put it together into such a damning picture, wanting, hoping my people could be better...
I will make them better.
My government might be as bad as any other, be it through their ignorance regarding the Reapers or their falsehoods on a galactic stage, but that does not mean this is a fact that cannot be changed.
Aethyta was right. The asari are a force for good in the galaxy, and can be so much more.
I cannot simply begin a campaign using the Broker's resources as a blunt tool; it will take years, decades, to make such a change, the correct people in the right places, and that will mean waiting until after the Reapers have been defeated so-
A light squeeze on my hand draws my attention back to the wrecked living room, all three other occupants looking at me curiously.
'Wasn't expecting you to be smiling at that, kiddo...' Aethyta begins, looking a little baffled.
Faith's dancing voice is full of mirth as she replies. 'That look means she's got a plan, and won't stop thinking about it until somebody distracts her.'
Goddess... a warmth rises to my cheeks as I shoot Faith an affectionate glance.
You know me too well...
Aethyta breaks into a grin, shattering the uncertain mood in the room. 'Well... unless Shepard wants to... distract... you upstairs, how about we stop this miserable discussion, and I tell you about the time I took your mother to Tuchanka?'
Watching the pair of fine asses sway out of the room, Aethyta sat back with a satisfied smile, head spinning pleasantly.
Nezzy and I created a masterpiece right there.
Liara had grown into a real pretty young woman, and while there was a long way to go before the girl treated her anything like a parent - mostly work on Aethyta's part to make up for everything she'd done - it had been nice to actually talk to her... hell to even see her, to get a proper look in person without the kid becoming suspicious. She was beautiful, managing to capture all of Nezzy's noble grace - not to mention that rack - without carrying it like a spoiled brat, and there was a deep strength and stubbornness that Aethyta liked to think she recognised a little of herself in.
Her gaze shifted over to the Spectre at Liara's side just before they disappeared up the stairs.
Not too bad either, if you're into big girls...
She felt a pleasant warmth at the memory of their brawl. It wasn't often she got to properly let loose, and the imminent threat of death always had her itching for a release. The human had a pair of wonderful strong arms and shoulders... there weren't many asari built like that, meaning she was stuck with either a flimsy lady or some male plumbing to deal with when she needed to get her rocks off... it wasn't often you got both in the same package.
Good choice, kid.
She blinked, and kicked herself, alcohol clouding her brain. Properly meeting her daughter for the first time, then start perving on both her and her girl a couple of hours later... real classy.
With an awkward cough, she turned her gaze back to the room, to see Shiala staring at her.
It's been a while...
For a long moment, the two simply stared at each other. Nezzy's old guard had been fairly quiet for most of the evening, simply staring at Aethyta as if trying to bore through her skull with her gaze.
After some amount of time Aethyta couldn't properly judge, Shiala cracked into a small smile. 'You look like shit, Thyta.'
With a derisive snort, Aethyta replied, 'You're not doing too great yourself, green girl.'
As Shiala's eyes flashed with wicked humour, Aethyta felt herself relaxing a little at the familiar back-and-forth the pair used to share. The green asari leaned forwards, smirking. 'I got infected by an ancient plant monster. You got beaten up by a little human. I th...think you're getting old.'
'Bah, I let her win,' Aethyta replied, knowing that Shepard could quite easily have killed her if she really wanted to. But a girl didn't just go admitting that kind of thing. 'I couldn't just go beating up Li's girlfriend. Not good for the old first impressions.'
'And just showing up like this is?' The ex-commando's voice was still light, but Aethyta heard the caution just below the surface. 'Why did you really come back?'
With a sigh, Aethyta filled up both her and Shiala's glass, and in silence the pair drank them down. The human had knocked back a surprising amount of the stuff earlier without it seeming to affect her overmuch, and Aethyta knew now she wasn't kidding when she had come into her bar all those months ago, saying she couldn't get drunk. Being a paragon of asari wisdom, Aethyta had kept up with her anyway, not to mention what she had drunk with Liara and the others.
Last one for me...
'I told Liara the truth. I've not even been a shitty father to her. I've been nothing at all.'
Glancing up at the green skinned asari, she suddenly felt the need to vent to somebody, and a commando she once held an easy-going camaraderie with was about the best she could hope for. Shiala was also a trusted confidant of Benezia's - one of the few mutual friends the couple had shared, now Aethyta thought about it. Couldn't stand most of Nezzy's stuck up accomplices... ha, and I'd have liked to see a couple of my buddies at one of her parties!
Lost in memory, she spoke again, wisftul. 'I'm sure you know most of what was agreed. I'd get lost and let Nezzy get on with her life, as long as she let the kid go her own way when it came to it. Seemed like a good enough deal, any daughter of hers deserved better than me fucking up her life.'
A tiny blue baby flashed through her mind, gurgling happily, clasping her finger and inspecting it as if it held the answer to all of her little life's questions...
She had only seen the baby once before she'd left. Any more, and it'd have been impossible...
Her voice cracked at the memory. 'She deserved the fancy house, the... the best schools for that brilliant mind, anything she ever wanted... I couldn't give her any of that.'
'She needs more than money, Thyta,' Shiala whispered quietly.
'I know that!' she exploded in response, thinking of all those times she'd seen the girl come into her bar on Illium with empty eyes and empty heart, wishing like nothing else that she could fix it. 'That's why I came back! The promises I made don't mean shit if she's unhappy. It's not about me and Nezzy any more... hell, it never should have been in the first place.'
She shook her head angrily. 'Both of us, thousand years old and didn't know crap. I can't change what I've already done, but if there's anything I can do to help here, I'm gonna do it.'
The raging anger instantly burned out, replaced with a melancholy that sat deep in her gut, making her nauseous. 'I know I didn't deserve her letting me stay. But... she's given me a chance, and I'm gonna try to do it right. For whatever it's worth.'
The silence drew out again, until Shiala spoke quietly. 'I think she reg...g-gretted it, you know.'
'Huh?'
'Lady Benezia. She would-'
Aethyta slashed a hand in front of her face hastily, despite knowing it was already too late. 'Sorry babe, I don't want to hear it. It's ancient history now.'
Looking bemused for a second, Shiala eventually shrugged indifferently and sat back in her chair. 'If you wish.'
Disgruntled, Aethyta stood up.
'Where are you going?'
'Need some air,' she grunted, feeling her stomach churn again. 'Don't wait up, I might be a while.'
Seeing Shiala nod before reaching for her cane, Aethyta carefully made her way across the trashed front room and stumbled outside.
'Uuuuggh...'
Damn alcohol resistant human...
The soldier had even started healing faster than Aethyta, swelling across her nose nearly gone by the time she and Liara had headed to bed.
It didn't make Aethyta, whose entire face still ached all over and stomach was sore inside and out, feel any better... it made her feel uncomfortably old.
Damn human!
Taking a deep and very cold breath, Aethyta glanced around herself. It had been over a century since she'd seen the place, and it was still beautiful, even covered in snow and nearly pitch darkness.
Shiala's comment about Benezia gnawed at her mind.
"She regretted it, you know"
Damn! Interrupting Shiala then had been the worst thing she could have done for her curiosity. What had she regretted? Booting Aethyta out? That decision had been as much her own as Nezzy's. They'd lasted a hell of a long time together - more than most asari couples ever did - but they'd both sensed that as they turned from matrons to matriarchs, what they wanted from life was diverging even more than normal.
Sure they had argued; it was practically the foundation of their relationship to disagree on things. But it usually led to both of them being a bit more enlightened, accepting the other's point of view, and best of all some awesome sex afterwards. But before little Liara was born, though, things had been... tense. The arguments were more gruesome passive-aggressive sniping than real blow ups, and led to Aethyta sleeping on the couch rather than entangled in her lover's arms. In hindsight she saw that it had been over for years, but neither of them had realised it until they had the one, just one, argument about Liara.
It had involved no shouting. No anger. Just... a realisation, that had torn Aethyta's heart in half. That they could not raise the girl properly if they were together, when they both wanted such different things. So Aethyta had agreed to leave, on the condition that Liara be given the chance to spread her wings when the time came, rather than be forced down whatever path Benezia wanted for the girl.
Had Benezia regretted not involving her in Liara's life? All she got for the trouble of over a century of loving and offering her life code to map little Liara by, was the occasional note about how Liara was doing at school, a photo every few years and hardest of all, a single missed call from the girl herself that it had taken every ounce of willpower she had not to return. Benezia had later tersely explained it was because she'd left her omni-tool lying around and Liara had been poking through her contacts. She still had the recording of the thirteen year old girl stuttering about wanting to know who she was in relation to her mother, trying to sound authoritative.
She took another breath, feeling her head begin to clear.
And now, a century or so on from that, and she was standing, drunk, on the girl's front porch, knowing she and her girlfriend were probably screwing upstairs.
Life was funny like that.
She had made the contact. And... Liara wanted her to stay. To get to know her.
After the uncomfortable explanation of just what the matriarchs were actually up to, the girl had been so full of questions Aethyta had tried her best to answer, Liara seeming to shift between businesslike drilling regarding her contact with the asari government, and an oddly childlike desire to know about her dad, and her mum... pretending that it wasn't important to her.
And with every single question she answered, Aethyta felt like she was adding another shining star into Liara's sky.
She smiled, happier than she'd been for decades.
Then her stomach heaved, and she vomited down the front of her dress.
'I... I suppose you wish to know why I did not tell you.'
I speak into Faith's bare chest, feeling it pleasantly rise and fall with her strong breath, my own heart slowly synchronising with her powerful beat. She has been so accepting over the past few hours, allowing me my curiosity and time to speak to Aethyta, but it is only natural her curiosity, her care, would have her wonder...
'I... did wonder, but guessed you had your reasons for not saying. If it's something you-'
'No, no!' I interrupt. Goddess, her care can be so frustrating! 'I should have known she would come, I have known she was following me for some time...'
I shake my head into her chest, enjoying her warm skin, her small, soft breast, the strong muscles beneath. 'I researched her background when my campaign against the Shadow Broker was nearing its conclusion... approximately three weeks before we assaulted his base. Finding that she is my...' I smile softly, knowing her preference for the word, 'sire, was not difficult. It took a little more time to determine her job for the asari government, but I judged that she would be more... sympathetic to me than any other.'
It was cold to think of her in such a way, but my work was too important to allow anything to get in my way, and she chose not to make the contact, just as much as I chose to pretend I did not know her.
'Why didn't you say anything? Or approach her?'
Of course...
'It... it was not important. I knew she would be more sympathetic to me than anybody else they could send, and if you had asked I would have told you, but there are so many little details to my work that you do not need to know about, this just seemed like...'
'Another one?'
I grimace at the tone of her voice; not cold or unkind, but with a tiny hint of... Confusion? Disappointment?
'I... yes. Like I said it is not important, with everything else, I simply thought...' I trail off, unable to finish. What did I think? In the past few hours I learned so much about Aethyta, even things about mother I did not know... although I do not feel ready to call her my father - or sire if Faith insists - to have denied this seems so meaningless in hindsight!
Silence, for a moment, punctured with soft breaths and gentle strokes across my crests, comforting rather than sensual in the moment.
'It... used to be important to you, Liara.'
'W... what?' It was never a serious concern, there were always more important things, my studies, my work...
'On the first Normandy, it was one of the first things we ever talked about... you wondered why she wasn't around, and I... I said that you shouldn't assume the worst.'
She remembers... I am not surprised, I too remember every conversation we shared over those months, the memories some of my most precious, that kept me going through her death and my time on Illium, but...
'I... it was simply a topic for conversation, I did not mean to...' What did I mean? 'I was curious, at one point, but I never felt a great desire to find out... the nature of asari mating means very often a fath-sire is not present when a child is raised because there is no true sharing of genes as with other species...'
The words sound hollow even to my own ears... do I believe that?
I had so many people around me as I grew up: mother, Shiala, Rania, so many other teachers... would another... a father have fitted in?
Especially one like Aethyta, such a difference to the staid surroundings of the wealthy estate and proper behaviour?
Faith's quiet voice continues, soft, comforting, 'If it's really not important I'll not push, Liara, but...' her body shifts, muscles rippling pleasantly against my skin, 'I get the feeling it's not as easy as that?'
'No... no...' What more can I say? Should I have told Aethyta I knew about her? Should I have told Faith, when I was truly convinced it was not even important to me? 'I... am sorry, I... I feel like if I had talked to you then maybe I might have realised...'
Realised what? That this... is important, that Aethyta's presence has actually made me feel more at home here, despite me never having known her?
'Don't be sorry Liara, family can make us do... odd... things.' Her chest shifts again. 'I'm really glad you two actually got to talk though. I'm still not totally convinced by her, but it seems like she really does want to... I don't know, try? When she showed up...'
Her uncertain tone pulls a smile across my face, and I draw a hand across the tight ridges of her stomach, feeling the mood of the conversation shift. 'I cannot believe you fought for me like that.'
She huffs, and my smile widens. 'My human,' I tease, 'protecting me from the intruder... who happened to be my father...'
'Sire.' I hear the mischief in her voice, and already know this will be an endless source of discussion... but I have other plans for her now, a moment of distraction from everything, to love and be loved...
'If you insist. It was very...' I slip my hand lower, dancing my fingertips along the tight curls below, and feel her breath begin to hitch. 'Heroic.'
'I'm... sorry I trashed your house, Liara.'
I chuckle at her abashed voice, but will not let her distract me.
'You will have to think of a way to make it up to me...'
'Oh? I-'
Whatever she was going to say is interrupted by a disgusting noise floating up from below our window outside.
And after a second, both of us begin to laugh, and laugh, and laugh, stress of the day finally melting away into silly giggles.
A/N: Thank you as always to Jay8008 and Vector 71 for all of the help with both substance and style, my writing would not be the same without you :-)
For a quick look to the future, I have one "fluff" type chapter planned as we frolic on Thessia, one (maybe 2) for the trial, and then the action will begin in proper!
My updates have slowed a little recently - it has been a little over a year since I published my first ever piece of fiction writing here, and the response has been incredible. Seeing so many views, favourites, followers and reviews never ceases to amaze me, and I want to again thank everybody who reads, (hopefully) enjoys and graciously gives feedback to my writing. It has been an amazing journey, thinking back over the last year - writing has become such a fulfilling pastime, though I've noticed recently the mad urge I had when I set out has died down a little... hence no more twice weekly updates! But in writing longer chapters and giving them longer to brew I'm learning a lot more about the writing process, and I hope you all continue to enjoy :-)
That said, I'll be making the attempt to keep chapters shorter once I'm finished with the Thessia "arc", which with any luck means faster updates!
Thank you all for staying with me on this journey!
