I was so excited to see that you all liked the last chapter. Thank you so much :) Andreathewriter: I haven't said anything about what Maya looks like, because she looks like her not-Naomi-Mum, and I'm trying to keep the mystery going ;) You'll just have to keep reading to find out. It does come up. TROLL: I feel so bad that you're allergic to chocolate. Here, take anything else you want *gives* (And long is good, eh? That'swhatshesaid :D)


Naomi was in bed. She was woken up in the morning by water running through the pipes in the walls. Cook's shower. He was always the first one awake, somehow. Plus, he liked to sing. Loudly. Naomi had gotten used to his gruff and indecipherable belting and it almost always helped lull her back to sleep. She'd wake up a little while later when a crashing sound echoed through her wall. Panda she would think as she'd roll over with a smile. Panda would always run into the shower door trying to turn the valves on. It was how she fully woke up. Naomi had seen her walking into the bathroom several times, eyes closed, hands stretched out in front of her, and then the crash always came followed by a surprised "Oh, bugger!" As if every day Panda was shocked that one minute she was asleep and the next she was somehow in front of the shower with a dull pain in her nose. Naomi would roll over, eyes trained on her closed door, and wait for fifteen minutes.

Sure enough, as soon as the water cut off and the upstairs went quiet, she heard the soft click of the door across the hall from her. That would be Effy. Just five minutes later, after a cup of coffee or maybe a bit of toast, the front door would swing open and slam shut as Effy left for class. "Safe," Naomi mumbled as she climbed out of bed.

It was strange, still living there. Living across the hall from her. They still hadn't talked, and Naomi didn't really want to. She didn't have anything to say to Effy. They had drifted and then fallen apart. They both let it happen. But Effy shagging some random, especially the same random that managed to get under Naomi's skin by simply existing, seemed unforgivable. It wasn't cheating, since Naomi didn't think that she and Effy were really together at the time it happened… fuck, they hadn't really been together in weeks. It was a silent thing, their breakup. Like they both just had a similar understanding of the situation when they thought about it. They didn't belong. To each other, with each other, they just didn't anymore. There was no fight. No lightning strike of understanding. No single event that drove them apart. It had just been a gradual descent into nothing. They made stops on the way, routine, obligation, but they never talked about it, so neither of them could do a thing to bring themselves back together on the same path.

When Naomi thought about it, which she did a lot, she realised it had been coming. She knew where they would end up, and somehow that knowledge made it bearable. It wasn't a surprise. It wasn't like this figure in her life had suddenly stopped being there and become something distant, much less important, much less present. A gradual descent. This outcome was almost expected. And Naomi wasn't mad or angry or hurt. She had regrets. Thoughts about what she could or should have done differently, but they never lasted long. It was done. It had happened and she couldn't travel back in time to change any of it. It was hard, but if she didn't focus on it, it was almost like nothing had changed.

Except she still couldn't bring herself to face Effy. Or Anna. She barely talked to Cook, even. Because he would always ask. And Naomi didn't have any answers. So she just avoided everyone for several days.

One Sunday morning, Naomi plodded down the stairs, the knocking on the front door echoing through the empty house. "I'm coming, I'm coming," She mumbled to herself, running a hand through her disheveled hair in an attempt at making it look a bit more presentable. She knew she had failed as soon as she caught sight of her reflection in the glass of the front door. "Shit," She murmured as another loud knock sounded. She unlocked the door and threw it open.

Anna was grinning, her left arm bent as she leaned her elbow against the doorframe above her head. "Morning, Nai," She said with a small wave as she pushed herself into the house.

"Anna, what are you doing here?" Naomi asked as she closed the door behind her.

"Is anyone else here?" Anna asked, her eyes scanning the hall and the stairs quickly.

"No. Effy's at work and Cook and Panda went… somewhere."

"You weren't answering my calls," Anna said suddenly, turning to face Naomi. "You haven't been to work in a week and, quite frankly, if I didn't think it would be a proper pain in my arse trying to replace you, I would." She hooked her thumbs in the front pockets of her jeans and shrugged.

"You're firing me?" Naomi asked, indignity dripping off every word as she raised her eyebrows.

"No, I said that replacing you wasn't worth the extra stress. But," She sighed, her eyes drifting down Naomi's body, "you haven't been to the office in a week and every time I call you don't answer. I'm sick of talking to your voicemail."

Naomi tugged at the loose fitting knit jumper and wished she was wearing something else under them other than a pair of Cook's old shorts. "Sorry about that. Things have been a bit…"

"Shit?" Anna offered with a small smile and a look of understanding.

"Shit," Naomi nodded in agreement. "I've been working on a few things here though," Naomi offered weakly, her gaze falling to the floor.

"I know. I got a call from that journalist." Anna leaned against the wall casually as Naomi's head snapped up. "His editor wants to do an entire segment on our shelter."

"Really?" Naomi's eyes lit up.

"Really," Anna nodded. "Apparently there's been a lot of interest and their phone lines have been flooded with people wanting to know how they can help. So the editor felt it was essential to run an entire piece on our particular mission."

"That's, well, that's great!" Naomi said with a grin. When Anna just continued to look at her, Naomi's grin slid from her face. "So why do you look like that's not a great thing?"

"Because you should have been in the office when we got that call. But you weren't, and you haven't been since, and now J.J. is handling most of it."

"Oh."

"Yeah," Anna said as she pushed herself off the wall. "Look, Nai, what's been going on?"

"You want some tea?" Naomi asked suddenly, jerking forward as she headed off down the hall. "I feel like tea."

Anna rolled her eyes but followed all the same. "Why are you freaking out?"

"I'm not freaking out," Naomi protested as she grabbed the electric kettle and started to fill it from the tap.

"Right. Of course. Hey," Anna said as she leaned back on her elbows against the countertop, "remember when you used to wash on a regular basis?"

Naomi glared at her as she flipped the kettle on. "You're so witty, aren't you?" Naomi mocked, reaching up to open a cabinet.

Anna chuckled. "One of my many talents."

They were quiet for a few minutes as Naomi pulled two teacups down from the cabinet, fetched a small tin of tea leaves and pulled open the utensils drawer to grab the mesh tea ball. Naomi laid them all out on the counter and then stared at the kettle, waiting for it to heat up. "So is this," Anna started to say, gesturing to Naomi, who crossed her arms over her chest, "about what happened in the office or did something happen between you and your lady?"

Naomi shifted uncomfortably. She wanted to answer 'both', because it was the truth, but she couldn't bring herself to admit that to Anna. "We broke up. Sort of."

"Ahh," Anna nodded slowly, stretching her legs far out in front of her, lifting her elbows and gripping the edge of the counter instead. "What do you mean, 'sort of'?"

Naomi shrugged and shifted her weight from foot to foot. "I mean that I assume we broke up, since I caught her shagging someone who wasn't me."

Anna's eyes grew wide and her brows shot up her forehead. "Oh… shit."

Naomi let out a breathy, hollow laugh. "Yeah."

"Sorry about that."

"It's fine," Naomi said as the kettle started to whistle and she switched it off. "The more I think about it, the more I realise it was bound to happen. We haven't exactly been solid lately."

Anna watched as Naomi filled each cup with water and then set about shaking tea leaves into the mesh ball. "More of you two not talking?" Naomi simply nodded, dropping the ball into one of the cups. "So much for not talking enough for anything to ruin your relationship."

Naomi slammed her palm down on the counter. "You think I don't realise that? You think I don't know exactly why we fell apart?"

"Sorry, Nai, I'm sorry. That was uncalled for," Anna said quickly as she pushed off the counter and took a step closer to her. "It's shit, and I am sorry," She said quietly, placing a tentative hand on Naomi's shoulder. Naomi nodded slowly and lifted the small chain, transferring the tea leaves to the other cup. She felt tears stinging in her eyes, but blinked them back as she took a deep breath. How obvious was it that she had fucked up with Effy? That Eff had fucked up with her? Anna made a noise somewhere between a grunt and a yelp and wrapped her arms around Naomi's shoulders. "Oh, don't do that. I hate when girls cry. I see enough of it every day, I don't need to be the cause of it."

Naomi placed her hands flat against Anna's shoulders and let the older woman comfort her for a minute. "Look at you, you saucy minx," Anna said with a lightness in her voice. "First you get me drunk and kiss me, and now you make me feel all guilty just so you can hold me. Cheeky."

Naomi laughed lightly as they pulled away. "I think you'll find that you got me drunk."

"Semantics," Anna said with a dismissive wave of her hand.

Naomi smiled and pulled the mesh ball out of the teacup before quickly tossing it into the sink. "I'm sorry about that, by the way. It was unprofessional."

"Yes, because me offering you whiskey in the workplace was the height of proper ethical protocol," Anna teased. "It's nothing to apologise for. I understand why you did it."

"Care to enlighten me? Because I haven't got a clue," Naomi said with a nervous chuckle as she headed to the refrigerator and pulled out some milk.

"Easy," Anna said with a smile as Naomi crossed the kitchen back to the tea, "you were confused and upset about your relationship, and in your state of emotional distress, you did something stupid and completely normal. You kissed someone you feel comfortable and safe with." Naomi raised her eyes from the cups to Anna's, which were lit up as she grinned. "Plus, there was all that whiskey."

Naomi couldn't help but laugh as she closed the milk carton. "When you put it that way it sounds so simple."

"Nai, I spent all my time at Uni studying human behavior. I spend all day, every day, helping women figure out their lives and talking through every last detail of their emotions. I've learned a thing or two about why people do what they do."

Naomi held one of the cups out to her and Anna took it with a murmured thanks. "So, what you're saying is that I'm nothing new?" Naomi asked as she took a sip of her own tea.

Anna scrunched up her nose and shook her head. "Sadly, no. You're exactly like the rest of us."

"Pity. Here I was thinking that I was something special."

"'Fraid not, love."

"Guess that means I'll have to go back into the office tomorrow."

"It might be a good idea. J.J. is great and all, but you know how he gets when he's under stress."

"Yes, I remember the fax machine incident."

"Tip of the iceberg, that. So you'll help him?"

Naomi scoffed. "It's my job, of course I will."

"Good," Anna nodded and took a sip of tea. "It'll be good for him to have a partner with a calm head on her shoulders."

The sipped tea in silence for several minutes. It wasn't awkward, but it was far from comfortable. The air hung heavy as Naomi tried to think of a good way to phrase the question that was playing on the tip of her tongue and Anna pretended like she didn't notice how Naomi kept swallowing it every other second.

"Well, this has been lovely," Anna said after she had finished her tea, "but I should probably go." She turned and placed her cup down on the counter.

"Whatdoesitmean?" Naomi rushed out as she leaned forward.

Anna's eyes widened in surprise. "Sorry?"

Naomi took a breath and closed her eyes, squinting out at Anna. "What does it mean? That I kissed you? And that you kissed me back?"

Anna's chest heaved as she inhaled deeply through her nose. She exhaled quickly. "It means just that. We kissed. It was nice, but it was just a kiss."

"Right," Naomi nodded, not feeling any less nervous.

"You know I'm shit at relationships, and I certainly don't expect anything from you. So, no big?"

"No big," Naomi agreed with a smile.

"Then I will see you tomorrow, bright and early and we'll get you and J.J. all set up."


It wasn't a big deal at all. Naomi returned to doing her work at work. She worked with J.J., the two of them bent over a speakerphone on her desk for hours at a time. J.J. would run through figures and numbers so quickly that Naomi would have to place a hand on his arm and mute the call while he calmed down. And then she would unmute and explain to the journalist what all those numbers meant in a more human and less statistic way. They arranged for the journalist and a photographer to come have a tour and an in-person interview. The journalist spoke with volunteers and women who were staying in the emergency housing section of the shelter. The photographer had the lens raised to his eye and never stopped clicking. He went through three entire rolls of film before they left.

Anna beamed with pride when they got the news that the article was going to be a four page spread in the Sunday edition. Naomi had the urge to kiss her again, but settled on hugging J.J. instead. And then had to spend ten minutes apologizing and trying to talk him down from his over-stimulation. She made a mental note that breasts, in any close proximity, resulted in a very, very 'locked-on' and non-functioning J.J.

Anna held a special meeting on the Sunday that the paper came out. The office was filled with volunteers and workers, sitting in chairs, on desks, on the floor. Every single person had a copy of the paper spread open in their hands. By the time the last person had finished reading, the air in the room was electric. Anna stood up and every single pair of eyes turned in her direction. "I just want to say thank you, to each and every one of you, but especially to Jay and Naomi. We all know how important the work we do here is, and this," She said as she lifted her copy of the paper, "will definitely help other people understand that, as well. I imagine it'll get pretty hectic around here soon, not that it isn't always," –there was a light round of laughter- "but if the response to the last piece is anything to judge by, we'll be swamped with calls and donations and all kinds of wonderful things that will make our lives chaotic for the next few weeks. Mark," She said as she inclined her head slightly toward him, "will be setting up the volunteer schedule to handle training any new volunteers." She paused, seeming to think of something. "Is that redundant? It sounds a bit redundant. Anyway, if you'd be willing to give him a hand with that, just let him know when you're available and he can sort you out." Anna gave a curt nod, signifying the end of her 'speech' and the room started bustling with action as people got up and set back about their regular business.

Naomi smiled and waved as a few people filed past her desk on the way out. She turned her attention down to her copy of the paper and carefully folded it up. The article was… amazing, was the only word she could think of. If that didn't draw attention to their cause, then nothing would. She was proud of it. The entire thing, every quote, especially from women talking about the help they had gotten from the shelter, broke her heart in a very good way. Naomi felt so grateful that she had been given the chance to do that as her job. She was helping. She was barely twenty years old and she felt like she was making a difference.

"You were quoted more than anyone else, you know," Anna said, dropping her own copy on top of Naomi's as she sat on the edge of her desk.

"Hmm? Was I?" Naomi asked, pulling her gaze up to Anna's eyes.

"You were," She said with a small smile. "It's really good, isn't it?" She asked as she trailed her fingers over the newsprint.

"It is. I can't believe it." Naomi smiled. "It's going to get us so much attention."

"It's going to get you so much attention," Anna corrected.

Naomi frowned. "How do you mean?"

"'Long and influential career', remember? Mark my words, Nai," Anna said with a wistful sigh, "you'll be able to do anything you want once you finish university."

"What if I just want to keep doing this?" Naomi asked with a shrug.

Anna smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. "If you're still here in two years I'll slap you upside the head myself."

Naomi barked out a laugh. "Are you saying you don't want me here?"

"Of course not," Anna said, sliding a little bit closer across Naomi's desk. "It's just that you're meant for bigger things. Worldwide things."

"Worldwide things?" Naomi repeated in disbelief.

"Mmhmm. Worldwide," Anna said in a stage whisper as she raised her hands up and wiggled them.

"Right," Naomi snorted, "because I'm supposed to take you seriously when you're giving me jazz hands."

Anna laughed and shoved Naomi's shoulder playfully. "So what are you doing with your new-found purpose in life?" She asked inclining her head towards the newspapers on Naomi's desk.

"Probably send a copy to my Mum, so she knows I'm not 'pissing away my potential'," Naomi said with a smile. "Maybe send a copy to Emily. I think they'd both be proud of me," She said much quieter.

Anna tilted her head. "Emily your friend studying in Greece?" Naomi nodded. "I bet she will be. The article is basically an ode to your work here," Anna grinned.

Naomi rolled her eyes. "Yes, alright, take the piss, come on, then," She said with a laugh.

"What? I'm not taking the piss," Anna said seriously. "I mean, look, it's right here in black and white," She said as she jabbed a finger at the paper. "'Naomi Campbell Single-Handedly Saves All the Women of Greater London'. How's that taking the piss?"

"Ha ha," Naomi deadpanned, standing up from her chair. "I think I'll go have a nice drink in celebration of everyone's efforts."

"Oh, Miss Campbell!" Anna chuckled, following in Naomi's wake as she walked across the office. "Champion of all that is good and right and just, please come back!"

"You're impossible," Naomi mumbled as she grabbed her coat off the rack by the door.

"You don't mean that, Oh, Great Defender!"

"Once we get out of this building, I'm gonna give you a smack," Naomi threatened with a grin.

Anna gasped as she grabbed her own coat. "What was that? The Paladin of Protection threatened woman on woman violence?"

"Oh, Jesus Christ," Naomi laughed as she rolled her eyes and left the office.

Anna was hot on her heels. "Alert the press! No, seriously, you have them on speed dial, right?"


We're standing in the middle of a corridor. I'm making apologies to people who have to walk around us as I try and tug on Maya's sleeve to get her to move out of the way. "Maya, come on – sorry- there are people -so sorry- everywhere." Her nose is practically rubbing against the notepad as she jots something down and without looking away from the paper, she turns and heads toward the wall. I sigh with relief when we both lean our backs against it. "Safe," I say quietly to myself.

"Is that the article my Mummy has framed in the office?" She asks, eyes still focused on her notes.

"Had, Maya, and yes. She held on to it for a long time and framed it, at some point. Said she was proud of me for it."

"Has, Mum, and thanks." She writes something with a flourish and turns her face up to me. "I won't let her get rid of it."

I sigh. "Maya, you can't force her to keep things like that."

"Yes, I can," She replies as she slides her pencil behind her ear. "It's the only thing left of you in the house and I won't let her throw it away. Come on," She says as she grabs my hand and pulls me away. "The touch tanks are this way."


Anna went with Naomi to get drinks. They laughed. They celebrated. They were both shouting 'Nostrovia' at the top of their lungs with every shot or sip they took until the word turned to jibberish in their mouths and came out as nothing more than a slur. Anna walked Naomi to the tube stop and Naomi kissed her again. Anna shot her a wink as she started walking away down the streets backwards. "You're gonna get me in trouble!" She called as she turned around.

"You are trouble!" Naomi shouted back as she headed through the doorway to the station.

She was smiling to herself as she unlocked her front door and stepped inside. She pulled her key out of the lock and shut the door behind her. The house was dark except for a light coming from the kitchen. Naomi heard voices and headed down the hallway as the voices died away. "Panda?" She asked curiously as she rounded the corner. "Oh." Her feet stopped suddenly.

Panda was leaning against the counter, and Effy was sitting on top of it right next to her. "Hey, Naoms," Panda said with a small wave.

"Hey," Naomi responded, folding her arms across her chest.

Panda looked from Naomi to Effy and back again. "Wow, I'm knackered," She said through an exaggerated yawn. "Big paper due in the mornin'. I should," She pointed to the hallway, "you know," She took a hesitant step away from Effy, "leave." She hurried forward and out of the room, shooting Naomi a quick smile as she passed.

Naomi held Effy's gaze for all of two seconds before the brunette dropped it to the cigarette case in her hands. She flipped it open, then shut, then open, shut, open. "Right, well I should go, too," Naomi said as she turned to leave.

"I saw you in the paper," Effy said and Naomi turned back around. She was still staring at the silver case. Shut, open, shut, open. Effy pulled a spliff out.

"Yeah, it wasn't really important," Naomi said awkwardly. That was the first thing either of them had said to the other in a long time. Up until then, any time one of them walked into a room, the other would walk out. It didn't happen often. Neither of them stayed in the common areas of the house for longer than necessary. For this exact reason, Naomi thought as her gaze roamed the kitchen before settling back on Effy.

Effy's eyes snapped up for a split second before drifting back down. She lifted the spliff to her lips. "It didn't seem unimportant," She said as she placed the cigarette case on the counter next to her left leg and picked up her lighter. She flicked it into life and Naomi watched as the orange light danced across her face.

"A lot of people will read it and it should rouse decent support, but," Naomi shrugged, trying to downplay it as Effy put the lighter back down.

"Then that's important, isn't it." It was a statement, not a question, and Effy turned her gaze fully on Naomi as she said it.

Naomi gulped. It had been ages since she'd been scrutinized by those eyes. "I guess, for Anna and the shelter, yeah, I suppose," She rambled on, trying to cover how uncomfortable she was. And failing.

Effy smirked and took a long pull off the spliff. "Right. Just for Anna. Because she was the one referred to as 'a soldier on the front lines of an equality war'." Naomi slowly looked up, fully into Effy's eyes. She was surprised that the girl had not only read the article, but memorised the part that made Naomi's cheeks burn with a fierce blush when she had read it. Effy's smirk twitched before disappearing as she took another hit. Her eyes strayed to the floor, her own feet dangling in front of the cupboards, the stove and finally the darkness of the hallway behind Naomi. But her eyes never actually settled on Naomi.

And Naomi was filled with an overwhelming disappointment. Effy still cared about her. Maybe even still loved her, and she had just let them fall apart. Sure, Naomi hadn't exactly been Miss Let's-Talk-Through-Our-Feelings, but at least she had admitted a problem existed. And once she found out about Effy's parents, she had every intention of diving into what would undoubtedly be a heavy and serious conversation about them. About what she and Effy were to each other. And Effy had never had that determination. Naomi wasn't mad at her. However motivated by fear Effy's actions and inactions were, Naomi understood them. Even if she didn't agree with them. Naomi cleared her throat and took a step back. She was sick of the fucking stalemate they had locked themselves in. And she was going to break it. "I'm sorry about your parents. Cook told me," She said when Effy's eyes snapped to her own. "I'm sorry that you got scared and didn't feel like you could talk to me about it. I'm sorry I never asked, even though I knew something was wrong."

Effy seemed to regain her composure enough to tilt her head as she inhaled another lungful of smoke. She breathed out slowly as that infuriating look like she knew every secret in the world slid back into her eyes. "I'm sorry I let us get invested in each other when I was never the one you wanted. It was bound to go tits up, I knew that."

Naomi frowned in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Effy studied her for a moment as she took another hit. She shrugged as she hopped off the counter and crossed the kitchen. "I'm stoned, remember? Who knows what I mean," She answered as she walked past Naomi into the dark hallway behind her.


They were civil to each other from then on, even if it was a bit strained. When Cook came downstairs one morning and saw them both in the kitchen, Effy drinking coffee, staring out the window and Naomi pouring milk over her cereal, he threw his head back and groaned. "Thank fuckin' god! It was like a fuckin' mausoleum 'round here." Effy smirked over the rim of her mug and Naomi smiled. He hopped onto the counter next to Naomi and grinned back and forth at both of them. "Let's go get pissed tonight an' celebrate."

Effy rolled her eyes and walked out of the kitchen. "Too soon, Cookie."

He turned his hopeful eyes on Naomi. "What the lady said," She told him as she picked up her bowl and headed to the table, where a newspaper was waiting to be read. "Just appreciate that we can stand to be in the same room, now," Naomi mumbled as she sat down. Cook grabbed the milk and started drinking straight from the carton. Naomi froze, her eyes wide and her spoon hovering just in front of her face. "Cook, that's disgusting."

He shrugged and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "You've never complained before."

Naomi looked at her spoon and then dropped it back into the bowl. "I'll just grab something on the way to class, then, shall I?" Naomi stood up and carried her cereal over to Cook.

He laughed as he took it. "Cheers, Blondie."

That weekend they all went out to celebrate Panda's birthday. Effy and Naomi had shared a spliff by the front door, which Panda took as a very good sign. "It's like you've crossed the Rubicon! Or maybe the Alps. Like Hannibal. I've never been good with analogies, but it's good, you two bein' pals," Panda said happily as she snapped a party hat onto Naomi's head.

Naomi looked up, seeing the hat resting slightly askew on her head. She understood what Panda meant, even if the girl was terrible at phrasing it. It was important. Speaking again, being able to not only stand, but be comfortable with, the other's presence… it was a big step. And they could never go back. Naomi knew that and she believed that Effy did, too. It had been hell, trying to avoid someone that she lived with. It was hard on her, it was hard on Effy, and it was unfair to Panda and Cook. Maybe Effy had been right and Naomi knew that they wouldn't last, either. They were too similar, in a lot of ways. And much too different when it really mattered. Naomi gave her hat a little tap, trying to straighten it out. "Panda, you'll never cease to surprise me." Panda grinned like it was the best compliment she had ever been paid and turned to Effy, another hat in her hands.

"If you try to put that on my head, I'll throw your body into the fucking Rubicon," Effy said without blinking.

Naomi stifled her laughter as Panda turned away. "Geez, Eff, ruin the mood why don't ya. Cookie'll wear it, won't you, Cookie?" Panda asked with a smile as Cook came down the stairs.

"'Course I will, Pandapops," Cook grinned as he hopped off the stairs and landed next to her. He ducked his head down as Panda reached up and slipped the elastic around his head. "Fuckin' mint," He said as he straightened up and clapped his hands together. "We all ready to go, then?"

They headed to a pub down the road first. Cook bought them all a round and Panda started dancing to an old song playing from the jukebox. Cook, Effy and Naomi had another drink and Panda's hat ended up resting just above her ear as she thrashed around the pub. "There will plenty of time for dancing later," Effy said as she grabbed Panda's hand and led her out. Cook and Naomi followed and they all went on to the second stop of the night. Naomi's phone rang as they were waiting at the bar. She smiled as she answered it.

"Anna, lovely to hear from you. It's been, what, five hours since I left?"

"Five hours and nineteen minutes, actually, and I'm ready to bash my own head in."

"Are the new volunteers not working out?" Naomi asked with a laugh as Cook ordered them drinks.

"I love the help and enthusiasm, but they're like puppies, the lot of them. I turn my back for two seconds and they've piddled all over the floor," Anna replied with a sigh.

"Sorry to hear that."

"No, you're not."

Naomi laughed. "No, I'm not."

"I knew it. So what are you doing? I fancy some intelligent conversation."

"It's my friend's birthday, remember?"

"Ah, fuck, I forgot."

Naomi pulled her phone away from her ear as Panda gestured frantically for her attention. "Is that Anna?"

"Anna?" Cook said, turning toward them.

Naomi rolled her eyes at the fact that Cook, no matter how distracted he was, would always pay attention when a girl's name was mentioned. "Yeah," Naomi answered, looking at Panda.

"Oh, invite her! Me and Cookie want to meet her!"

Naomi glanced at Effy, who seemed completely uninterested in the conversation. "You're sure?" Panda nodded enthusiastically. "Hey, Anna?" Naomi lifted her phone again.

"Uh-oh. I know that voice. What's going on?"

"My friends want you to come out with us."

"Oh, I wouldn't want to intrude. It's her birthday and all…" Anna trailed off.

"Um, she seems to be pretty insistent, actually," Naomi said, fighting to keep her hold on the phone as Panda grabbed at it.

There was a moment of silence where Naomi literally got into a small slapping fight with Panda. "Do you want me to come?" Anna asked hesitantly.

Naomi managed to fight off Panda and sighed with a content victory. "Yeah. I mean, yes, you should come. The more the merrier, right?"

Naomi could hear the smile in her voice as she answered. "Alright. Where's the next stop on your whirlwind tour? I'll meet you there."


Panda and Cook were standing in the corner of the pub, belting out 'Baby, It's Cold Outside' like their lives depended on it. They were both putting on quite the show. They were pulling faces with every line they sang and making desperate gestures to each other. Cook was swinging the cheap microphone like he was a rock star and Panda was dancing in circles around him. "Your friends are absolutely mental," Anna said with a completely enthralled and awestruck smile.

Naomi grinned. "They really are." She took a sip of her lager and shook her head as Cook dropped to his knees and clung to Panda's left leg with one arm.

"How can ya do this thing to me?" He sang with an overly dramatic sob into the mic.

Anna burst into laughter and leaned into Naomi's side. "Are they like this all the time?"

"Unfortunately. Karaoke is just about the only thing Cook enjoys doing that doesn't involve going on the piss or the pull."

Anna grinned from ear to ear as Panda and Cook finished the song with a flourish. She clapped wildly along with the other two dozen people in the pub. Cook grabbed Panda's hand and they dipped into a bow. Naomi threw her head back and laughed. Cook jumped in the air and clicked his heels together as the host shooed them away from the small monitor. They walked over to Naomi and Anna and Cook wrapped his arm around Naomi's shoulder. "After that entertaining and quite dramatic interpretation, we now have Sammy coming up to do… ah," The host said, his eyes scanning the crowd, "ABBA's 'Gimme Gimme Gimme A Man After Midnight'?"

"And on that note," Naomi said as she pulled her cigarettes out of the back pocket of her jeans, "I'm taking a break."

"Hang on," Cook said as he lightly tapped her arm, "where's Eff?"

Naomi pointed to a corner where Effy seemed to be occupied with her hand up a blonde girl's skirt. Cook's mouth fell open into a small 'O' and Panda turned her eyes nervously to Naomi. "It's fine," Naomi reassured her. "But I'm going outside for a few minutes."

"I'll come with you," Anna offered. "I could use some fresh air." A low guitar riff started playing from the speakers and Anna grabbed Naomi's elbow. "Quickly, before the song really starts."

Naomi chuckled and let Anna pull her towards the door just as the drums and synthesizers kicked in. She glanced over her shoulder and saw Panda doing what could loosely be called the Robot while Cook howled and clapped his hands. The door swung shut behind them and Naomi leaned back against the brick wall. She pulled out a fag and offered it to Anna. She stared at the pack and Naomi gave it a small, tempting shake. "Go on, then."

Anna sighed and pulled one out. "This'll be the third time I've quit and failed," She said with a light laugh.

Naomi smiled as she put the pack back in her pocket and pulled out her lighter. "Quitting's overrated anyway," She said as she lit the end. She kept the flame ignited and cupped her hand around it as Anna leaned forward and lit her own.

Anna took a deep drag and exhaled slowly. "Oh, fuck me, that's good." Naomi grinned and slipped the lighter back into her pocket. Anna leaned against the wall next to her. "So are you really fine with it?"

"With what?" Anna jerked her head toward the door and Naomi shrugged. "No reason not to be."

"Glad to see you're not over-thinking things," Anna said with a smirk.

Naomi chuckled. "I've thought about it, I've cried about it, I'm moving on from it."

"Oh?" Anna took a drag off her cigarette. "And how exactly are you doing that?"

"I just am," Naomi said simply.

Anna grinned and tossed the rest of her fag into the street. "Come on, we should be up soon. I signed us up to do some Sugababes."

Naomi's eyes grew wide and she sneered. "You did what?"

"Busy throwin' hints that he keeps missin'," Anna half-sang slowly as she grinned and plucked the cigarette from Naomi's hand, tossing it into the street.

"No, I'm not doing it." Naomi shook her head.

"Don't have to think about it, I want a kiss and," Anna grabbed Naomi's hand and lifted it in the air, forcing Naomi into a slow twirl.

"I won't sing," Naomi said with a smile.

"Everything around it, but he's too distant." Anna sang, turning Naomi to face her. "I wanna feel his body, I can't resist it."

"I can't believe you know all the words."

"I've been waiting patiently for him to come and get it." Anna started dancing and rested her hands on Naomi, forcing her hips to move with her. "I wonder if he knows that he can say it and I'm with it." Naomi laughed and rested her hands on top of Anna's, moving of her own accord. "I knew I had my mind made up from the very beginning." Anna pulled Naomi closer. Naomi lifted her arms and wrapped her hands around the back of Anna's neck. "Catch this opportunity so you and me could feel it."

"I need you to stop singing now." Naomi grinned and leaned forward, pulling Anna's head down until their lips met, both of them smiling into the kiss.


Naomi did sing that night. She had several shots of tequila before their names were called, but she did sing. And she had the most fun she had had in ages. Cook and Panda danced and at one point Panda charged Naomi and stole her microphone, singing 'My sexy ass has got him in a new dimension', complete with a shimmy-shimmy-shake. Naomi laughed and sang over her shoulder.

Effy disappeared at some point, as did the blonde she had been chatting with. Naomi shrugged it off and agreed easily when Panda suggested that they all do a Girls Aloud song. They all drank. They laughed. They were banned from singing any more after Cook finished 'Sound of the Underground' by kicking over the lyric monitor. Naomi tried to explain that it was an accident, but they were still asked to leave. Anna headed home, saying that she had to get up early in the morning. Naomi kissed her again before she left. Cook threw an arm over each of Naomi and Panda's shoulders and waggled his eyebrows. "What was that about, Blondie?"

Naomi felt a heat rise in her cheeks and wasn't sure if it was a blush or just from drinking so much. Maybe both. "What was what about?"

"That little smooch you just had."

Naomi shrugged and Cook pulled her tighter to his side. "It was nothing. Just a casual thing."

"That didn't look casual, Naoms," Panda chirped. "That looked like a proper snog!"

Naomi laughed. "It was just a kiss, Panda."

"Well, I like Anna," Panda said with a nod. "She's fun, isn't she, Cookie?"

"Anyone who can get our uptight Naomikins to sing in public is alright in my book."

"Cheers, Cook," Naomi laughed as she pushed herself away from him. "That's real sweet."


It was just casual, Naomi kept telling herself. No matter how many times she and Anna kissed, which seemed to be quite a lot, she never thought of it as anything more than just friends having a good time. If she felt like kissing Anna, she did. They had a casual relationship outside of work, and neither of them let it affect how they were at work. Naomi stayed in London over Easter break and ran a meeting with a group of lawyers who were interested in setting up pro bono services for women at the shelter who wanted to pursue criminal charges. Anna was right by her side as they sorted out details. They celebrated that night in Anna's flat with a bottle of wine, which they didn't finish. Kissing turned into something more. Much more. Naomi left early in the morning, still telling herself that it was casual. It was normal for friends to have an absolutely amazing shag and not have it progress to something more. She managed to convince herself, for a while.

Anna let Naomi work less as the end of her school year rolled around. Naomi had opted out of taking any summer courses so she could work full-time. She'd have plenty of time to catch up at the shelter, so she spent a couple of weeks poring over textbooks and notes for her exams. She got a letter from Emily that included the date of her return. Naomi wrote back immediately saying she would be at Heathrow to welcome her back. She returned to her studying with a refreshed enthusiasm and impatience. The sooner exams were done, the sooner Emily would be back. Naomi was excited, but also extremely nervous about her return. Before she knew it, exams were finished and Naomi was sitting on the tube on a sunny Thursday morning, on her way to fetch Emily.


Maya gives my hand a squeeze. "It makes sense."

"What does?" I ask as we stop in front of the open stingray touch-tank.

She lets go of my hand and holds out her notepad and the map. I take them and she just stands there, facing me, for a moment. "With Effy there wasn't really friendship. I mean, there was, but not enough. It was more just being attracted to each other. Sex." I open my mouth to argue, but can't seem to form any sort of dissent. I smile as I nod my head for her to continue. "And then with Anna," She continues as she turns around and lifts herself up, resting her elbows on the edge of the tank as her feet dangle above the floor, "it was all friendship. And maybe you confused that with something more?"

"Maybe," I say noncommittally and step up behind her as she dips her whole hand into the water. "Careful," I whisper as she wiggles her fingers. The aquarium employee is at the other end of the tank, giving a well-rehearsed and absolutely boring speech to a small group about different types of rays and how new research says that they aren't related to sharks, or maybe they're more closely related to sharks than had been previously believed. I don't know. His voice sounds like white noise and his tone is so monotonous that if I actually listened to him, I'd probably fall asleep on the spot. I shuffle myself a bit closer to the tank and grin as Maya's fingers run over one of the stingrays' wings. She looks up at me with a radiating smile.

"I touched it!" She says in an excited whisper.

"I saw!" I reply with matching enthusiasm.

"That was so cool!" She hops away from the tank and moves to take my hand again.

"Let's get those washed, first," I say with a laugh. "You're all covered in stingray germs."

She rolls her eyes but smiles anyway. "Yes, Mum."

There's a small standing sink against the wall that we head towards. "I just realized something," Maya says as she squirts some soap into her palm from the dispenser.

"Oh? And what's that?" I ask as she rubs her hands together furiously.

"Emily. You said that you and Emily wrote letters and postcards, but you haven't mentioned them." She turns the water on and rinses her hands off.

"What, do you want a word-for-word retelling of the letters?" I tease as I pull a paper towel out for her.

Her face lights up as she takes it. "Do you remember them that well?"

My mind is suddenly flooded with thousands of words, written and received, and at least a dozen pictures from all the towns and cities and islands that Emily visited. "No. I don't remember them at all." It's a lie, and I can tell that Maya knows it. I think, that as long as I live, I'll never forget those letters. I think that when I'm ninety years old and can't even remember my own name, I'll still remember those words. The happiness in every line Emily wrote to me.

Maya doesn't press me on the issue. Instead she takes my hand and gently leads me from the wash station. "I want to see the sharks now. Tell me about when Emily came back?"


If you couldn't tell by the ending, Emily was supposed to come back at the end of this chapter. HOWEVER, I feel bad making my chapters so long lol I know you all say you don't mind, and I love that, but I do feel bad, forcing you all to read so much. Suffice it to say, everyone's favourite redhead will be at the very beginning of the next one. (Have I succeeded in intriguing you? Are you all thoroughly intrigued?) See you soon with the next one! :)