Chapter Thirty Three
"Hey, Sweetie," Eddie soothed as she took Lila in her arms. "Don't cry. It's nothing to get upset over."
"Yes it is, Mom!" insisted Lila as she continued to cry. They were in the exam room at Dr. Mianni's office, having just finished with their 35-week appointment. "She said the babies should come by 36 weeks and I'm not dilated at all! Do you know what this means?"
"I know what it means technically, sweetheart, but what does it mean to you?" Eddie asked compassionately.
"It means I'm not even close to having these babies, that's what it means!" exclaimed Lila.
"Come one, honey, now you know that's not true," Eddie reasoned. "You're very close to having the babies, it just might be a little bit later than we'd like it to be is all."
"I'm tired of being pregnant!" screamed Lila. "I just want to have the babies!" She buried her face in her mother's chest and sobbed.
"Hey, hey, look at me," Eddie said after giving Lila a moment to get her emotions out. "You've only got a ten to twelve days at most. Remember, the doctor said if the babies don't decide to come before the 19th, she'll induce your labor."
"That's too many days away," sniffed Lila, calming down a little. "I'll go crazy before then."
"No you won't, honey," Eddie assured her. "You will be just fine, trust me. I've been there too and it always seems longer than it is. Dry your eyes, let's go get some lunch and tell Steven the news. Do you want to go pick up Dad?"
Lila nodded, and held onto her mom, grateful she was here to help her see reason. "Let's go, Dad loves it when he gets to mop me up from crying, makes him feel loved."
Eddie laughed at Lila's truthful observation and escorted her daughter to the car arm in arm.
Steven was at a fire when Eddie and Lila swung by the firehouse, so they headed out to 1PP to surprise Jamie. Detective Meyers smiled, "Go on in. He just tossed out the brain trust so I think he'd be really happy to see you."
When they entered the office the two women found Jamie pacing between his desk and the Windows.
"Jamie," Eddie greeted offering a smile when he turned to look at them.
Jamie walked back hugging his wife and daughter. "Hey what are you doing here?" It was then looking at his daughter that Jamie noticed the redness in his daughter's eyes. "What's wrong princess?"
"I'm not dilated yet, Daddy," Lila sniffled. "Why not?"
It was moments like this when Jamie still saw Lila as his tiny little girl crying when her teacher put her out of her dancing school for shedding her tutu in class. "Your body isn't ready for the babies to come out yet," Jamie comforted. "But I promise you soon it will be and you'll have two adorable little ones to love. You should try to relax, before your Mom had Joe she had a nice massage and it helped relax her. Why don't you and Mom go do that, get massages and pedicures and have a girls' day."
Eddie smiled, 'That's nice Jamie and we probably will do it but what's got you so upset. You promised me you weren't going to get upset."
"Sometimes being a little smarter than most of the people you work with is really irritating…some concepts that seem so simple to me, it's like they are just out to lunch totally. They don't get these concepts."
"Jamie, you are abnormally intelligent," Eddie soothed. "Just try to dumb it down a little and please take some breaths baby."
Jamie leaned over and kissed her lips. "I love you, I promise I will relax and I'll see you at home. You two go have fun. I'll see tonight. I'll be home by six, I promise."
Eddie took Lila to her favorite massage parlor, the place she still went for lymphedema massages to this day. The therapist gave Lila a gentle but thorough pregnancy massage then worked on Eddie's more sensitive areas, her left arm, legs and lower back. The two ladies enjoyed a shared brick oven pizza then headed home so Lila could take a nap.
Lila was staying with her parents for the next couple of days while Steven was working. Lila remembered him insisting on it, she was surprised he went for the idea.
"I'd really feel a lot better if you stayed with your folks while I'm onthe three day," Steven told Lila later that week. "If you go into labor, even being so close by I'll be worried."
Lila smiled, "So will my mother so I packed a bag and I have a spare hospital bag at their house. You didn't miss the part where I'm not dilated at all, did you?"
"No, but I have had guys deliver babies in the back of ambulances and fire trucks when they weren't expected for weeks and I'd rather out twins be born in a hospital or at least you house where it is clean."
Lila laughed, "Drop me over there then?"
Lila helped Eddie get dinner, "Where is he?" Eddie grouched pacing the floor. It was almost seven and Jamie wasn't home yet.
"He'll be here soon Mom, don't worry." Lila knew it was long a point of contention between her parents that Jamie was still working. Lila stirred the potatoes and soon they heard the door open but instead of Jamie called out, the heard his briefcase fall to the floor and very uneven footfalls move then stop abruptly. The chair made a sharp thud under the weight of a person falling into it. Both women shared worried looks.
Eddie almost jogged to the living room wanting to protect her daughter if something bad was happening. She found Jamie collapsed in the chair, one arm over his eyes, his briefcase discarded on the floor. "Jamie?"
"I'm so sorry, Eddie," Jamie groaned. "I'm sorry I was late, I…"
"Forget that right now, you're in pain, where, is it your leg?" Jamie still had bad muscle spasms in his leg.
"No, my head, it's a horrible headache…"
"Let's get you to lie down," Eddie sighed. "Right here on the couch, come on now…" Eddie held Jamie as he walked shakily to the sofa. Eddie put a pillow under his head and after undoing his shoes but two under his legs to lower a high blood pressure. "Lila, please bring an ice pack," Eddie called out. Lila had stayed out of her parents' way.
"Eddie, I'm going to be sick," Jamie moaned before the ice had a chance to hit his head. Eddie helped him to roll and put down some newspapers in case Jamie vomited. He had not had a migraine of this magnitude since his stroke.
Worry showing in her face Eddie sat on the couch next to Jamie rubbing his back. "Did you feel like this all day?"
"No just a few hours. It's been a long day, lot of people who don't see the obvious," Jamie almost moaned the answer.
Eddie gave a disapproving shake of her head continuing to rub his back. "Jamie, sweetie you can't keep coming home like this. If the job is so stressful that it makes you sick its time you retire."
"I can't Eddie!" Jamie's eyes rounded shocked she'd even suggest that.
"Look at you Jamie the stress is making you sick. Nothing is worth risking your health," Eddie tried reasoning with him but it wasn't easy with his stubborn Reagan temper.
"Please, Daddy," Lila implored him kneeling next to her father and holding his hand. "You already had a stroke and you are only 62."
"I know baby, in a few more years," Jamie replied fighting another bout of nausea. "I'm sorry, I can't eat right now."
Eddie nodded, "I know you can't. You lie there and rest, we will eat our meal and hopefully when you're head feels better you'll see reason. Come on to eat, Lila, leave him alone."
Eddie was so angry she was shaking. "Eddie, calm down honey," Frank soothed.
"No, Frank!" Eddie sighed. "He has to retire, he keeps kicking that can down the road, and I'm not letting him have another stroke. I'm not doing it. There's no way I could even care for him like things are now. This time, if he strokes, he's going to die and I'm not ready for that!"
Jamie heard Eddie's words, and he knew his stress levels were scary for her. He promised once his head stopped aching he'd comfort her and show her he was still okay.
Lila went up to bed early, she knew her parents needed time to talk things out. Frank did his treatments and went to bed early as well leaving Eddie and Jamie alone. "Let's go up to bed too," Jamie suggested. "I can eat a sandwich up there, I do feel so much better." Jamie slid his arm around Eddie but she side stepped him. "No, not this time."
"Eddie, we talked all this through," Jamie sighed as they sat on their bed. "We said I'd retire when Jack was ready to step up, after the election. That's over a year from now."
"Exactly!" Eddie snapped. "It's over a year from now, a lot can happen in a year Jamie. Last year, I was healthy, now I have this kidney thing and these horrible medications that make me look like this…"
Jamie reached out for Eddie. Lately she had totally cut off that part of their relationship, when she did let him make love to her he had to work for it and she often ended up in tears. Eddie stepped back, "No, you can't love it away, Jamie! You can't cuddle it away and make me not be scared. I want you to retire, I need you to retire, I really do! And I don't know if our marriage will work anymore if you don't."
Jamie stared shocked at her bringing their marriage into it.
"Eddie please let's talk about this," Jamie begged sitting up slowly.
Eddie shook her head at him moving further away. "No Jamie enough is enough. I'm not going to sit back and watch you get sick or worse over a job and I'm scared that's what'll happen. I love you Jamie, but I can't do this anymore!"
Jamie swung his feet over the bed standing up. "Eddie, I love you and I'm not going to get sick over this. Baby, please don't ask me to do this, to make this choice."
"I'm not asking you to make a choice, I'm asking you to stick to our deal. You promised if things were getting too hard that you would step down, I call long hours again and migraines again time to step down. You promised me!"
"It's not the right time, I can't say more than that now and I know you understand that."
Eddie let the tears fall down her cheeks. She pulled the covers down and laid on her side of the bed, legs pulled up, crying into her pillow.
"Eddie, you need to talk to me baby," Jamie encouraged, she was making that sound, the sound he hated above all else.
"Jamie…please…I am begging you, please…Go…leave this room, please…"
Jamie sighed, he knew when Eddie asked that she really needed space. Jamie leaned down to kiss her head, "I love you, nothing more than you, you know that." Jamie's voice cracked as he turned to leave and head downstairs.
Jamie went to pour himself a glass of milk and was not at all surprised when Frank pushed his bedroom door open, "I heard…thin walls, good hearing aid." He moved and sat down. "The job isn't worth in Jamie. It's not worth thirty years."
"How did you know Dad?" Jamie asked sighing. "How did you know when it was time?"
"When I felt it was no longer effective to have me in the chair, but I didn't' have to consider a wife. You do have to consider Eddie in this Jamie, it's not just about you and the work son."
Jamie took a breath, "Today was a fluke. I am okay, she's going off the deep end. To be honest, Dad, things with me and Eddie they aren't good. You know that you can hear it."
"I think that you are pushing her Jamie, she's telling you something by cutting you off in the bedroom, she's saying I am scared and hurt and I need you to see that…You need to see that in her, you always used to be able to do that."
Jamie sighed, "This medication changed her Dad. It changed my Eddie and not just because it made her heavier, it changed her inside and I missed the person before it all started, but I'd rather live with this newer more insecure Eddie than not have her in my life. I love my wife, I want her alive."
"I know, believe me if there were these meds when Mom was dying I'd have had her on them. Jamie you need to think about things, try to reach Eddie on another level. Do it by taking care of Lila or taking a day off and taking Eddie to lunch, don't show her she's beautiful by asking to make love to her all the time, she might be tired, she might be in pain, she's giving you the stop sign so don't run it. Find another way to say that you love her and she's beautiful to you no matter what. Trust me, if you do that, things will get better. Eddie loves you. Now go up there with a cup of tea, set it down and give her a little kiss and that's it."
Jamie nodded and brewed Eddie's favorite blend and made it just the way she liked it. Carefully Jamie brought it upstairs and put it on the nightstand. Eddie was lying still awake, but no longer in tears. Jamie brushed a piece of her hair off her face, "I made you some tea. Tomorrow I will take off and we can relax together."
Eddie sniffled, "I meant what I said, Jamie. This is a nice gesture but…If you can't retire right now you have to tell me why."
Jamie sighed, "As soon as I'm able I will do that and I promise you baby, you will understand."
Eddie nodded and turned over reaching out for Jamie's hand. "I'm sorry but I can't…"
Jamie moved and held her, he didn't try to escalate it, he just held her close to him hoping she could feel the love and the commitment from his body to her heart and her soul. Heaven knew it was there.
A/N: Yes, unfortunately Jamie and Eddie are heading for some marital strife. The medication Eddie is taking is physically and mentally draining and she certainly has cause to worry about Jamie.
Next Update – June 16th – The family comes together for Sunday dinner, Frank offers Lila some advice on starting her labor.
