Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards. ~ Soren Kierkegaard


The millennium ring shines brightly in the sun, sparkling and captivating.

(He eyes it askance.)

Then slowly, hesitantly Ryou places the ring around his neck.

-0-

The voice promises to help them. Yuugi and Jou and Honda and Anzu; promises to help his friends escape. (His friends, Ryou repeats this to himself because it has been so long since his mouth has been able to say those words and he loves the taste.)

And he won't put them in danger. The voice is dangerous; the voice is made of shadows.

I will not harm them, the voice assures, I am only trying to help. You need my help.

The voice is right and Ryou knows it. He had promised himself never to be a danger to his friends again, but how could he deny help when it was offered to them on a silver platter?

Just put the ring on, the voice cajoles and Ryou bits his lip.

They really do need to escape. And after all everyone deserves forgiveness right?

(Everyone.)

Could the voice really be trusted? After everything it had done? He grasps the ring tighter, eyebrows furrowing in the process.

(Everyone?)

Indecision would be the death of them. It was now or never.

(And yet – )

Ryou holds the ring up to the light, trying to examine it further.

-0-

Ryou opens his eyes, feeling familiar dizziness. Images bombard his mind and he takes a few minutes to sort out the ones that are happening now. The dizziness wears off just a bit, just enough so that Ryou can see Yuugi sprawled over the Monster World, board eyes closed. He is not breathing.

Ryou feels his heart shatter and cannot bring himself to look for the others who are surely in the same position. (Because of him and what he had done.) And some part of him is thankful that they will never wake up, so he will never have to face them. Because Ryou knows he should have tried harder to stop them; he should have forced them out of his apartment the moment they stepped in.

But it felt so good to have friends.

(And with a pain, Ryou realizes that that one sentence will always be in past tense.)

He closes his eyes, wishing there was some way he'd never have to open them again.

"Bakura!"

Ryou's eyes snap open.

"Bakura-kun!" Yuugi says rushing over to him.

The newest of all feelings surrounded him. Gratitude, disbelief, happiness.

(Happiness…)

He is happy!

"Yuugi-kun!" he calls back, just as excited.

"We did it Bakura-kun!" he says happily, violet eyes shimmering.

(Ryou thinks maybe his eyes are shimmering too.)

"Yeah, we did it," he agrees, smiling. Smiling because now he has friends, now there will be no more blackouts and no more of those shadows.

Finally, the cycle is broken.

-0-

(Happiness…)

Ryou is starting to remember that feeling. It had been so long. Living by himself was lonely and isolating, monogamous to the point of insanity. All days blurred into each other, some days blurred out completely. In fact, sometimes Ryou would wake up and not know how he had gotten some place or what day in was. In fact, sometimes it seemed as if the shadows in his apartment were moving. In fact, sometimes Ryou could swear he heard someone, even though Ryou was alone.

(Always alone.)

But that had all started to change around that day Ryou found a box waiting for him at his door. The set to Monster World. He had ordered it after his father had sent more money in his monthly checks than usually, but he had never imagined that the game would be so much fun. Of course at the time he had no one to play with, but simply admiring the lead figurines sparked enough in him where he could almost remember a time when life had color.

It was a few weeks after this that he had meet Atsushi. Atsushi loved games just as much as Ryou did and it had taken him another few weeks to invite the boy to his house.

But Atsushi was here now and Ryou was almost having fun. Ryou rolls the dice, or at least tries to but –

The world is blurring.

(The world is losing all of its color.)

Shadows take over.

Ryou wakes up some time later, dizzy and unable to concentrate for a few minutes.

Atsushi does not.

-0-

Ryou doesn't quite understand why he always has the ring on.

It is not as if he is proud of it. (Well he is, secretly deep down inside. Something about the way it shines in the sun…) not overtly so, at least. When he wears the ring, it is always hidden underneath his shirt. Ryou figures this is because of bullies, he does not want to give them another reason to tease them. But secretly he wonders if it is because the ring does not want to be seen.

Still doesn't explain why he wears though. It is not as if Ryou enjoys the ring. He doesn't particular like it at all. It is intriguing (and perhaps even beautiful) but it is also…oppressive.

He scoffs to himself, that's just silly. It's just a ring. It does have a will or mind of its own. He is not afraid of it. He could take it over anytime he wanted.

(And yet – )

Ryou never goes a day without wearing it, regardless.

-0-

There is a box waiting for Ryou at his door.

Pleasantly surprised he bends down to get a closer look at it. There is also a letter. Ryou already knows who it's from.

(He is still surprised though.)

Carefully, as he is currently unaware of the contents of the box, he brings it inside his apartment. He sighs heavily and opens the letter.

Dearest Ryou,

I'm sorry I'll not be home for your birthday. We are just making too much progress for me to leave now. Hopefully this will make up for it. The man at the bazaar said it's called the millennium ring and had something to do will that card game you enjoy so much!

Sincerely,

Your father

He hates that his father always signs his letters to him that way, but the reasons are too numerous and tangled to think of now. Again he sighs, but not because of disappointment. It's not like he had had been expecting his father to come home anyway. He lets his knapsack fall to the floor and begins to rummage through the box. His hands grasps something that gives him a sting (or was it a more of a spark?) and he pulls it out by its rope.

The ring. It is very Egyptian; Ryou wonders what it is doing here with him instead of a museum on display. Almost beautiful too, in a haunting sort of a way. The eye in the center of the ring pierces through him and for a split second he cannot breathe.

Ryou holds the ring up to the light, trying to examine it further.

The millennium ring shines brightly in the sun, sparkling and captivating.

(He eyes it askance.)

Then slowly, hesitantly, Ryou places the ring around his neck.


A/N This is the weirdest mix of all the animes, and the manga. Like monster world and the fact that Ryou voluntary puts back on the ring during Duelist Kingdom. Yes this chapter is written chronological backwards so you might want to reread this chapter frontwards (starting with the last section and working your way up) and see if you catch anything. Review, please!