A/N: Hey everyone, sorry for that long hiatus. Vacation ended on time but I came back to a mess at work. Next week SHOULD be better, and we should be back to two or three chapters a week, if not more. That's the hope, anyway.

Also, I just realized that it's been just about two years now since I sat at work bored one day and decided to start a ME fan fiction for just an hour or two of distraction. I never thought then that my 'distraction' would ever progress this far…but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Now, on to the show!


Being a Spectre- and considering the situation- to find herself in a sleep deep enough that the slightest motion or sound wouldn't instantly awake her was unusual. The events of the past several days had been intense, and as anyone, she was starting to feel the exhaustion, but even so she hadn't thought herself so exhausted that any disturbance wouldn't rouse her instantly.

It was just past four a.m. ship time, and they had departed Nakira to rendezvous with the mixed fleet heading to Permiatic eleven hours before. Sleepily rousing just slightly, the asari shifted when she realized she could not feel her bedmate, turning slightly to drape her arm over the slumbering Shepard.

Her arm landing unhalted on the cool blankets beside her was what truly brought her to consciousness, and her eyes snapped open in confusion. She lifted her head, scanning her room.

Del was seated on the low sofa several feet away, an empty wine glass in front of her. Her position was odd, leaning forward with her elbows on her knees, her hands clasped together and curtains of sleep-mussed dark hair obscuring her face.

She looked almost as if she were praying.

Troubled that the woman had woken and had been able to rise out of bed, dress, and move around the room without waking her, Liara shifted aside the bed sheets and sat up. "Del? Are you all right?"

There was no response or motion from the human woman. A vague, sour tightening of alarm began in her gut, and Liara got to her feet and started toward her. "Mer-"

She broke off, seeing Shepard's clasped hands clearly now. They were almost consumed in tangles of thin black metal threads.

"Open comm! Dr. Chakwas we have an emergency in my quarters!" Liara called out, rushing forward and shoving the small table away with a light sweep of her biotics, dropping to her knees in front of her love, the skirt of her white shift pooling around her. Her hands reached out to grasp Del's but then hesitated. Before, in the Consort's chambers, Pio's threads had reached for her as well when she had gotten too close, and she did not want to risk being snagged.

Ducking her head, hands trembling as they resisted the urge to grab hold of her, Liara tried desperately to see Shepard's face. "Merah!"

Suddenly the threads shifted outward, fanning as they swiftly unraveled from Del's hands, drawing back. As they did, Shepard lifted her head with a soft gasp and a blink, staring at Liara as if she had just suddenly come awake. In moments, her hands were free, the threads gone.

"Liara-?"

The asari instantly reached out, sweeping a hand over her cheek, brushing her hair back as she peered with intent worry at her face, before both hands dropped to Del's and lifted them.

The implant was back to its small starburst on her wrist, all traces of further growth gone.

"Merah, are you all right?" Liara asked, then turned her head as her door swept open, Helen rushing in with a medical pack.

"What happened?" she asked, hurrying to Liara's side and kneeling as well, setting her pack on the sofa beside the geneticist.

"The implant became active again," Liara said. "It was taking her over-"

"N-no, it's ok," Del replied, straightening a little as Chakwas took her hand, exposing the implant and examining it. "It wasn't-"

"I'm not seeing signs of activity now. Doctor, are you feeling all right?"

"I'm fine," she said, tugging her hand back. "It wasn't like that. It wasn't taking me over."

"Merah, I saw those threads binding your hands," Liara told her. "You were unresponsive for several moments until they retreated."

"I know, I'm sorry, I was…it wasn't Pio's fault."

"What were you doing, Shepard?" Chakwas asked. "Tell us exactly what happened."

"I couldn't sleep," she said. "I kept thinking…about Permiatic. About Gellian and that ship and the Antennae…Tali and Delphine. God, Tali and Delphine. They're still prisoners on that vessel. Ruth told us she thought they were still alive but I don't know if that's true, or still true. They're my friends, both so young…I know that in the grand scheme of what we're facing, losing them versus losing the entire galaxy is a non-question, but I just…I can't bear just leaving them on board while we destroy that dreadnought."

"I know," Liara said gently. "If there was any way we could have a chance at retrieving them…Goddess knows that Deefa and I have been wracking our brains for any possibility at their rescue but so far we have come up with nothing."

"I know…I've been thinking about it too, and I keep coming to the same dead ends. No one can get close to that dreadnought without Gellian knowing about it- certainly not aboard it. The moment someone set their boot on that ship the very walls could tear them apart, and she doubtless has Tali and Delphine sealed away somewhere that we cannot even hope to reach them. I just…"

Her eyes swam momentarily and Liara lightly touched her knee. "Merah…"

"Too many quarians have already died because I wasn't quick enough," Del said thickly. "Delphine is just a kid-"

"Their fate is not your fault, Shepard," Liara said. "This is Osco's sin, not yours. Do not take responsibility for it."

"Liara's right, doctor," Helen said. "You didn't put them there. You didn't kill the quarians. You can't beat yourself up over this."

Shepard's brows knit tightly and she shook her head. "I told Delphine I would make sure she was all right. I made that promise. I can't just accept that…that there's nothing we can do to help them. So, I…decided to try and see if I could communicate directly with Pio, find out any more information, if it knew any weakness that the dreadnought might have, any hope of a way to get them safely out of her hands. I managed to wake it up. We were just…we were talking."

"Talking," Liara repeated, brows knit. "Merah, we do not know enough about Pio and this technology to risk such activities. It is best for your safety and ours if it remains dormant until we can find a way to remove it. Ruth Wyatt may not be the most honest person in this galaxy, but I believe her about what affect these implants have had on her and on Osco. We cannot risk-"

"We cannot risk losing this fight!" Del replied stubbornly. "That's what we cannot risk, Liara. Anything that may give us an edge has to be explored-"

"I am not willing to put your life or your sanity on the line, Shepard," Liara replied, tense.

"You didn't. I did, and it is my life and sanity to risk!" Del said. "I promised that girl, Liara! I'm not leaving her or Tali to Gellian Osco's madness, not if there is any hope of any way to get them back again!"

Glancing between the two, Helen decided it was best to halt the brewing argument as quickly as possible. Putting a hand on Liara's shoulder before the captain could reply, she looked at Shepard. "All right, done is done, and it seems to be dormant again now. So, did it work? Were you able to learn anything?"

Shepard nodded, sitting back a bit. She looked at Liara with a wary and almost hesitant expression. Clearly, she did not think the captain would like what she had to say.

"I did. I think there's a way to get them free and off that ship, but it's incredibly risky…and it involves the Aswa going to Ivix and not Permiatic."

Liara was already shaking her head. "I have entertained that notion as well, Merah. Osco's lab base on Ivix is under Alliance control and we can easily access it with their permission, but it is a futile gesture. They have been examining that dark archway since before we even departed. They have not been able to activate it or even begin to attempt to explain how it works. Just turning it on could take years of steady research and even then, we cannot guarantee we can open a Fold, let alone one that directly connects to that dreadnought."

"We can't," Shepard said. "Pio can."

The way Liara drew back ever so slightly, the faint narrowing of her eyes, exposed her feelings. For one usually so well guarded, it was as blatant a display as it would be if she had simply shouted and ranted. Not wanting to give the asari a chance to object until she could fully explain, Shepard continued on quickly.

"Pio is part of that technology and it's designed specifically to interface with it. In fact, when I mentioned it, Pio seemed incredibly eager. It wants to get on that dreadnought, Liara. There are another quintillion Pio there, and it is terrified of its aloneness. It will help us, very quickly, if doing so means getting back to them."

There was a moment's thought, then the asari shook her head. "No. No, it still does not help our situation. Even if Pio were able to activate the dark archway and open a Fold directly onto that dreadnought, any invading team would be slaughtered by the ship the moment they stepped foot on board, to say nothing of whatever Orthrus or alien troops she still may have in stasis, awaiting deployment. Nothing we have in the way of weapons or armor would protect them, certainly not long enough to actually find and somehow retrieve Tali and Delphine. And without countless hours and a team of specialist microsurgeons, there is no way we can remove that implant and return Pio to where it wants to be anyway."

"Yes, there is…you just don't want to consider it," Shepard said softly, without malice. Her answer came in the hardening of Liara's sky blue eyes.

"No, Merah. You are not going aboard that ship."

"Liara, if I go through that Fold onto the dreadnought, with Pio's help I can integrate at least partially with that ship. It says it is not common for more than one 'brasa' to be integrated but it is very possible…sometimes whole teams are integrated if the ship is big enough, each mind taking over a specific function in autonomy rather than the entire workings of the craft. My integration may be enough to at least…distract Gellian for a while, enable a team to get on board and get Tali and Delphine out of there-!"

Her voice was rising a little, becoming more intent, as Liara started shaking her head again, negating her words even as she spoke them.

"No! It is far too risky! First, you may not be able to successfully integrate. If you were, you may not be able to distract Osco at all. Hers is a formidable mind, and though you are incredibly intelligent, you are not as intelligent as she is. However, even if you were able to distract her long enough for a team to rescue the two prisoners- provided we can even find them and provided they even still live- how would we get you back again? In order to integrate so fully, more Pio would have to be introduced to your systems…how do we get them out again? Do you think they will simply leave you because you request it? Suppose they do, suppose they are cooperative- the moment you are separate from the ship and your struggle with Osco, she will kill you. She will have full control again in a nanosecond, and before you can take two steps back toward the archway, she will kill you."

"You just said if there was even a chance at retrieving them-!"

"This is not a chance, this is suicide!" Liara replied hotly, then lowered her head and pinched the bridge of her nose, rising to her feet. "Helen, please excuse us."

There was no questioning her words were a direct order. Taking her medical kit, Chakwas rose with a nod and left the room- probably grateful to have escaped before things got worse.

Shepard rose as well, her dark eyes simmering like smoke from a volcano as she regarded the asari. Her voice was low and firm as she spoke. "Liara, we are all at risk in this thing. Those two are just kids, civilians. They did not ask for this, and we cannot abandon them."

"You are a civilian as well," Liara replied angrily. "And neither did you ask for this! You are asking me to trade your life for theirs…no. No, you are asking me to trade your life for the infinitesimal possibility of theirs! It is not even a guarantee, Merah!"

"So we just don't try, is that it? Say we win, say we destroy that ship and stop Osco for good and all. You truly expect me to be able to go on with my life, to look at myself in the mirror each and every day, knowing I had a chance- slim as it was- to save those kids and I did nothing? How can I live with that, Liara? How can you even ask me to live with that?"

"Instead I am supposed to send you to your death," Liara said furiously. "I am supposed to just watch as you walk onto that ship and die, to lose-"

She broke off, turning away and striding a few paces into the middle of the room. Her hand lit blue, and with a low growl she swung it out, biotics tearing over the items set out on a nearby shelf, sending them careening and crashing to the floor.

She stood there, staring at the broken mess on the ground, her fists clenched and still wreathed in swirls of dark energy. After a moment, she felt arms slide slowly around her waist, Shepard's head resting on her shoulder. The stone on her face broke and melted, her brows and lower lip trembling a moment as helplessness took over her expression.

"I cannot lose you," she said softly.

"I don't want to die, Liara," Del said, just as softly. "I just…I can't see any other way. Even if we can't find them, at least we can know that we tried. And perhaps the infiltration team can plant bombs or something that will help take that dreadnought out from the inside- put a stop to this faster and save even more lives. I'm the only one that can do this. The moment this damned implant attached itself to my wrist it made that inevitable-"

She felt Liara suddenly stiffen, but the look on her face as the asari turned around and stared at her was not one of anger or grief, but of dawning realization.

"What is it?" Del asked.

"You are not the only one who can do this, Merah."

"What do you mean? Removing the implant would be nearly impossible, you said it yourself…and I'm not willing to entertain the idea of somehow transferring it to someone else! Even if that could work, sending someone in my stead, knowing they were probably giving their life up for mine-"

"No, that is not what I mean," Liara said, then fixed her eyes. "There is another, someone who is already implanted, someone who may have more influence over Osco than you could possibly hope to achieve, someone who has already expressed a desire to terminate her life."

Shepard stared at her. "Of course," she whispered. "Ruth."


Ixis was as cold and as beautiful as always. Even inside the facility, where the environmental systems kept it comfortably warm, Del Shepard could somehow still feel the sharp and icy chill, deep within her gut. It seemed to cling to her as they entered, following an Alliance private as he directed them into a small room.

The turian vessel that had been holding Ruth Wyatt had been only one of three shadowing Osco's dreadnought. Even so, the captain had seemed somewhat reluctant to take his ship off the prowl and redirect her at FTL to the moon base. Still, he had done what he was told, and they had arrived shortly before the Aswa had landed.

There were now only a scant handful of hours before the dreadnought would reach Permiatic. Time was swiftly vanishing between their fingers.

Ashley and Sam halted outside the room as Liara and Shepard stepped within. Two Alliance guards were already there, in addition to the private, and a stoic turian. Seated at a table and fastened to it with binders on her wrists, Ruth looked only tired and mildly irritated.

"Where's my gun?" she asked the moment Liara walked in, her eyes lifting to the asari. "I've provided everything I know, given you the location of every world, moon, or asteroid where there's a component of that super weapon waiting to go off. You know how to halt or disable them. Now where's my gun?"

"I may have it for you," Liara said evenly. "Metaphorically speaking, that is."

She frowned. "Metaphorically? Goddamnit, I want to die. How hard is that for you to grasp? I kept up my end of the bargain, T'Soni, you could at least-"

"You will get your wish, but you have not yet begun to make up for your part in the situation we now find ourselves in. We have a plan that may allow you some small level of atonement, and will very likely end in the manner you desire."

"Jesus Christ," Ruth said, lowering her head and rubbing her fingers just below her hairline in weary agitation. "What? What do you want me to do?"

Shepard stepped forward and looked at her, lifting her wrist. "I have in this implant a single Pio, one that very desperately wants to get to that dreadnought. I have spoken with it, and it is willing to activate the black archway in this facility and link a Fold to that ship. Once that is done, this Pio will transfer itself to you, and you will cross into that Fold, board the dreadnought, and help us get Tali and Delphine back- returning it home in the process."

The look Wyatt gave her was incredulous. "You're kidding me, right?"

"We are absolutely serious," Liara said. "You will enter that dreadnought, and the Pio will integrate you into that ship. Pio will be back where it wants to be, and in return, it will help you to distract Osco's control long enough for an infiltration team to board, locate our people, and extract them back here. Once that is done, it is very likely Gellian will overcome your defenses and put an end to you."

"You're just…you're just trusting that thing in her wrist that it'll do all that?" She scoffed. "And what makes you think I'm capable of distracting that beast for any length of time? Or that she will kill me at the end?"

"We are trusting that some of Osco's feelings for you remain intact," Shepard told her. "They were present enough to allow you to leave in the first place- we're hoping your very return will be distraction enough-"

"And if it's not?"

Liara faintly arched a brow. "Then she will simply kill you the moment you step foot aboard, and we are no worse off now than we were before. You, on the other hand, will have gotten what you wanted."

Her eyes shifted a bit, and she said nothing. Del looked at her.

"We are also hoping that you will be able to help bring down or at least redirect some of her systems while you are integrated. Disable her weapons, lower her shields, confuse her commands…anything that will allow our ships to get in and take the dreadnought out faster and with less risk."

As she spoke, Ruth let out a mirthless laugh and sat back, looking up at the ceiling. "You really are ambitious. You realize what you're asking is impossible, don't you?" She looked at the pair. "At my best, Jelly could dance circles around me intellectually without even breaking a sweat…and that warped thing that has taken her place is ten times more skilled. I won't last five seconds."

"Then, again, you will have what you want…and we are no worse off than before," Liara told her.

"I want to die, I don't necessarily want to be killed at the hands or…or mind…of the woman I love!"

"I thought you said that the woman you loved was gone, that this thing is only a perverted copy," Shepard said. Ruth gave her a scathing look.

"And what if I'm successful, doctor?" she asked. "What if it works, your team finds those two trophies of hers and gets them out again…but Jelly doesn't decide to kill me? What if she simply holds me prisoner there, perpetually alive and aware but trapped, impotent, in an eternal waking torture?"

"We have a fleet of a hundred vessels that will be arriving at Permiatic within sixteen hours." Liara said. "They will engage that dreadnought on all fronts and they will not stop until it is destroyed…killing the ship, Osco, and you right along with it."

Ruth leaned forward, eyes hot. "That 'dreadnought' has capabilities you cannot even fathom. Its weapons can cut through any of your ships like a hot knife through butter, and at full power its shields will be so strong you might as well be throwing pebbles at a brick wall, hoping to topple it! All you will get is a hundred wrecks and thousands dead…and that ship will still fulfill its mission."

"Well, then…you had better hope your efforts to weaken her systems or take them down altogether are successful," the asari said.

"What about a bomb?" the turian spoke up suddenly, drawing all three sets of eyes his direction. "We could slap explosives to her. She detonates that in the ship after the two civvies are removed, and that should at least do some damage. Hell, make it a pocket nuke, destroy it from the inside out."

Ruth barked a laugh. "I walk onto that ship with any kind of explosive device and she's going to know it in all of six nanoseconds. In seven nanoseconds she'll have me closed in solid metal, unable to move or breathe until I suffocate…if she doesn't just decide to crush me on an atomic level and have done with it! Can't say as I mind, but that does fuck-all for your distraction or your infiltration team."

Liara was tapping her fingers to her lips. "It does not have to be on your person," she said thoughtfully. "The Fold must remain open long enough for the team to get back out with Tali and Delphine. If we fire a rocket mounted pocket nuke through the Fold the instant after they return, she will not have warning or time to stop it. We can close the Fold the moment it has passed through, breaking our connection with the dreadnought and containing the detonation to the ship. I hold no illusions that even a pocket nuke inside her walls will bring down that monster, but it will severely cripple her and allow the fleet to finish the job."

Shepard gave Liara a hesitant, troubled look, biting her lip slightly- but said nothing. Ruth only looked distant and thoughtful, turning it over in her head. Finally, after a very long moment, she nodded, meeting Liara's gaze once again.

"All right," she said. "I'm putting a lot of goddamn trust in you and what you can do, T'Soni. If you think you can pull this off, then all right. I'm in."