Chapter 3 - "Unwelcome Surprises"

Author's Notes: Same disclaimer as before. This chapter has received more revision, so hopefully it's a tiny bit more accurate. If not ... well, I tried.


Sam slightly panicked when Janet handed her a glass jar with a black screw on lid.

"Janet, you've got to be kidding."

"The bloodwork says I'm not."

"I'm confused."

The women looked at Jack O'Neill, straddling the back of a chair and looking bored out of his mind.

Sam sighed. "Janet wants me to give a urine sample."

"I didn't have to."

"Well, sir, your bloodwork isn't showing elevated levels of progesterone, as well as higher than normal levels of hCG."

Jack raised an eyebrow.

"Janet—"

"I'm only asking you to take this test to … disprove a hypothesis, more than anything. If it's wrong, then we'll keep looking."

"What if it's not wrong?" Sam asked quietly, raising her blue eyes to meet those of her best friend.

Janet began to reply, but sighed instead. "One step at a time, okay?"

Jack's eyes flew between them, then gave a little gasp as his mind finally made the connection. "I didn't know pregnancy tests were a standard test for a physical," he deadpanned, attempting to add some levity to the situation.

Sam groaned. "Believe me, sir, I do not want to be doing this."

"Because … you're worried it may turn out positive?"

She stared at him with a straight face, despite the flurry of emotions just beneath the surface.

Thankfully, Janet interceded. "The nausea and vomiting that Sam has experienced could easily be attributed to morning sickness. Also, her blood work showed elevated hormone levels, consistent with an early pregnancy. Of course, the naquadah in her blood could be playing games with me, but we're doing the test to find out."

"All right, let's get this over with," Sam finally said, effectively ending the conversation for now as she took the cup in her hand and walked into the bathroom, locking the door behind her.

A few minutes later, she exited, holding the cup firmly in hand. She glanced upwards at the man looking at her nervously. His brown eyes were wide with anxiety and dread. The now grey hair was being mussed around as he ran a hand through it, and judging by the various directions it was pointing, she doubted it was the first time.

Janet extended her hand for the urine sample and Sam quickly gave it to her.

"So … what's the answer?" O'Neill asked.

Sam sighed, crossing her arms. "It takes a few minutes to run it through the computer."

He nodded curtly, then rose from his chair, slowly pacing towards the door. "I'll be back in a little bit."

As she watched him leave, a thousand thoughts flooded her mind. The fact that she had even had to pee in a cup to run a pregnancy test when she hadn't slept with anyone was bizarre enough. The irrational fear that she knew it would come back positive was even more disconcerting.

She shut her eyes, folding her hands over her face, and leaned her elbows on the table next to her.

Even though Janet had expedited the results, it still felt like an eternity until Janet called out to her. "Sam?"

The tone worried Sam.

And just then, Jack wandered back into the infirmary.

Sam gave him a pleading look, and he nodded. They knew each other well enough that, whatever the outcome would be, this wouldn't leave the room on account of them.

She almost hung her head in despair as the thought floated across her mind. There were some things that had been left in a room for far too long, but she quickly berated herself. This was not the time to even be thinking about that.

The general and the colonel walked into Janet's office. "So, what's the answer?"

Janet sighed, then laid the test results on her desk. "It's positive," she softly replied, and Sam's world began to spin.


After the news, Sam had stood and walked out of the infirmary. Personally, Janet didn't blame her.

"There is no logical explanation for it, General, but Sam is pregnant. The evidence speaks for itself," she told him as he sat back in a chair, rubbing the bridge of his nose as he closed his eyes.

"Carter isn't even seeing anyone. At least, not that I've heard about." Jack glanced up at the doctor. "You?"

Janet shook her head. "To be honest, I'm at a loss for an explanation. The only one I could even conceive of—" She bit her tongue at her unfortunate choice of words. "—is immaculate conception. And unless God is floating around Colorado Springs, I've got nothing." The doctor wrote something down on a pad as she heard dragging feet as Sam walked back into the room.

Her arms were loosely crossed, more for comfort than in defense. "Can we keep this between us?"

Jack held his hands up. "Of course."

"Sam, I am slightly worried about a few things," Janet interjected, causing the astrophysicist to stare at her.

"Like what?" Sam asked, taking a seat.

"Normally, a urine sample wouldn't confirm a pregnancy until the tenth week or so, seeing as how they're not as sensitive as blood work. But judging by the levels that I detected, as well as the sudden onset of symptoms, I would hazard a guess that you've only been pregnant for maybe two days."

Sam digested the information awkwardly. "I've only been … pregnant for a few days. But my body is acting like I'm at ten weeks?"

Janet raised her eyebrows in disbelief as she opened the file. "Considering all of the strange incidents I've witnessed since being here at the SGC, I think this tops the list."

"So I'm mysteriously pregnant, and the … baby is growing at the speed of light." Sam chuckled. "Tell me this is just a bad dream."

Jack's head dropped lightly and Janet shook hers.

Sam raised an eyebrow. "Yep, this definitely takes the cake. Speaking of which, I'm hungry. My breakfast never reached its intended location."

"Definitely pregnant," Jack mumbled.

Sam shot him a look, then quickly returned her attention to Janet. "Can you refer me to an obstetrician?"

"Mm-hmm. Doctor Teresa Sanders works in town, but she's the on call OB/GYN for the local military installations."

"What about the naquadah?"

"Oh, Tessa is read in on the Stargate program. Won't be an issue."

Sam nodded, eyes blinking. Janet realized that the name was probably unfamiliar to her, even though other airmen and officers on base with children had known her for years.

Then she realized the truth as it hit her in the face like a bucket of cold water. Sam never expected to have a family. For her, given her line of work, having a baby was a near improbability. She hadn't even been on a date in who knows how long.

Sam groaned, leaning back in her seat, and Janet felt for her.

Jack patted her on the arm. "Don't worry, Carter. This stays between us. I think the less people that know, the better."

"I agree." Staring forlornly at her stomach, she added, "I just wish I didn't know."

Janet sighed, clasping her hands on the desktop. "We should do an ultrasound. If the fetus is growing at an accelerated rate, the scan would give us an approximate physiological age. Depending on how fast it's growing, we may be able to do an amniocentesis procedure tomorrow morning and determine its origins."

Sam nodded. "And in the meantime?"

"We probably should get you started on a prenatal vitamin supplement. It couldn't hurt, and who knows how the naquadah could affect it."

As her friend glanced down at her now-flat stomach once more, Janet's heart broke for her. Even though Cassie was a blessing to her life, sometimes she felt a pang of misery knowing that she didn't have the opportunity to carry her, to bring her into the world. Now that her best friend was on the other side, pregnant through unknown circumstances, she would barely be able to experience the joy of carrying a child before it would be born.

Janet sighed, then began to write down instructions.


Jack walked through the door of his house and sighed, closing it softly behind him. This day had been a total fiasco. All he wanted to do was grab a six-pack out of the fridge, park it on the floor next to the couch, and fall asleep watching something from ESPN.

Unfortunately, he was out of Guinness.

D'oh.

And without beer, he couldn't grill his steaks correctly, either.

He turned and opened the door again, noticing a silver car pulling into his driveway.

Carter.

She sat inside for a moment, looking like she was trying to rally herself.

Jack pressed his lips together, then waved.

Her wide eyes stared back at him. Then she returned the motion and hastily opened her door.

"Hey Carter. Long time no see."

"Yes, sir," she replied, opening the door behind her as Jack walked over.

"What's up?"

"Well, I got home and I started looking for something to eat, and then I realized that I had a pack of beer left in my fridge from the last time that Daniel and Teal'c came over."

"You had beer left over?" Jack asked with a raised eyebrow.

Carter glanced up as she picked a brown bag up from the seat. "You were in Washington for a budget meeting, sir."

That's the reason there's some left over.

"Ah."

"Anyhow, it's a stupid excuse to get in my car and drive someplace, but I figured that you might want it, seeing as how we drank yours last weekend."

"Carter."

"And then I realized that I may need to run to Target and buy some maternity sized clothes and I just—"

"Carter." Jack was standing two feet in front of her now, and he reached out to grasp her shaking arms, partly to calm her and partly to rescue the beer if need be.

"Sir," she replied softly, looking up at him. "I feel like I'm going to start sobbing any minute now, and I would really prefer not to do it in front of you. In your driveway."

Jack nodded in understanding. "Then how about inside while I make some dinner?"

"I don't … I mean—"

"It's no bother. You never are."

Blue eyes met his and gave him a quick nod.

He took the beer from her and she followed him in.

The DVR had been queued up to watch one of the playoff games from the Stanley Cup, but Jack grabbed the remote and turned it off.

Carter spoke quickly, "I'm sorry, sir, I didn't mean to mess up your plans—"

"You didn't, it's fine, stop apologizing for something you didn't do," Jack replied softly. He glanced at her quickly, then walked into the kitchen. "If Teal'c and Daniel needed a night off, I'd do the same for them."

"Yeah, I don't think they're going to be dealing with an unexpected pregnancy any time soon."

"Hey, anything's possible. Ya know, the more I think about it, that should be the new motto for the Stargate program. Whatdya think?"

She smiled. "I don't know, sir. It's kind of cliché."

"Perfect."

She giggled, and he let her.


Two servings of mashed potatoes and a steak later, Sam was lounging on the couch as Jack grabbed the remote and turned the game back on. "You don't mind?"

"No. To tell you the truth, I never followed sports that much growing up. Guess I've got a lot of making up to do."

"Then let's start with hockey, shall we?"

Sam laughed.


Sam crawled into her bed a little later than she usually did, but being able to attribute the lateness to an enjoyable evening with a friend made her more relaxed than usual.

She pulled the covers up to her chest and sighed, eyes slowly closing as she drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, she awoke with a startle. Something didn't feel right.

Oh no. Not morning sickness again.

She tried to jump to her feet but found a hindrance in her way.

Her blue eyes widened like saucers.

"Oh holy Hannah," she softly murmured at her protruding stomach.


Jack O'Neill walked into the base, a determined frown on his face as he pressed his hand against the palm scanner so quickly that he barely waited for the airman to approve it. Ever since a phone call that had woken him up way too early, his mind was running in circles.

He fumbled for his keycard for the elevator, which thankfully opened quicker than he expected.

It quickly took him to level 25.

Jack picked up the pace a little as he approached the locker rooms.

When he entered, Janet Frasier was standing outside a shower stall, fully dressed. Her arms were crossed as she glared at the drawn curtain.

O'Neill pointed to the curtain. "Saving it for later?" he said, attempting to add some levity to the situation.

"Janet, please tell me that you did not call the general in on his day off," Samantha Carter's voice rang out in agitation from within the stall.

He shook his head. When the doctor called, he had been hoping that she had been making this up, or playing an April Fool's joke on him. Yes, it was a few days past, but she was crafty.

"Given the situation, I felt that the general needed to be apprised. I have nothing to do with the fact that he came in on his day off."

"Janet, I'm not coming out. Just leave me alone, okay?"

Jack narrowed his eyes, truly confused. "Can someone fill me in? I feel like I may have missed something."

Janet motioned away from the shower. Still in earshot, she whispered, "We did the amniocentesis procedure this morning."

"Ahh," he replied, still clueless.

Then the phone rang.

Janet walked over to answer it. "Frasier. Okay, keep it elevated. I'll be there in a minute." She hung up and motioned to the door. "Infirmary. I got to go."

She mouthed, Can you try and get her out?

Jack gave her a thumb's up and she left.

He sighed. Rapping his knuckles on the curtain, he asked, "Hey, Carter, what's wrong?"

"Nothing."

Jack smirked, then against his better judgment he started clucking like a chicken. He realized that this might cost him a trip to the infirmary, but he didn't care.

If Carter was acting like a five year old, so would he.

She scoffed at him. "I'm not acting like a chicken," she replied quietly in self-defense.

"Carter, you're hiding in the shower after a doctor's visit," he slowly enunciated, letting the words linger for a moment. "I know what your IQ is, and this does not add up."

The silence between them lasted about five seconds until she finally spoke. "I don't want anybody to see me."

O'Neill nodded. At least she's starting to talk. "Oookay. Why not?"

"Because I ballooned overnight."

Jack shrugged. "Hey, it was your choice to eat five helpings of mashed potatoes."

She laughed, then stifled it. "It's just … I wasn't pregnant a week ago. And now I look like I'm starting my second trimester."

"So, you don't want people judging you and talking about you behind your back?" he asked, hoping he was right.

A pause, then: "Yeah, that's it. Exactly."

O'Neill almost laughed, but he didn't want to answer to Carter. Besides, it sounded like she was still trying to convince herself that was what she was thinking. He lowered his voice. "You're worried about the test results. Aren't you?"

She sighed. Then the metal rings that held the curtain to the rod slowly began to move aside.

Sam cautiously stepped out, dressed in a pair of baggy jeans, an oversized Air Force sweatshirt, and black flip flops. And as she lifted the sweatshirt off her body, Jack found that she wasn't exaggerating. When he had said goodbye the night before, she didn't show.

The regulation black t-shirt, usually a little loose, stretched tightly around her swollen abdomen. She didn't look as pregnant as she thought she did, but she hadn't just won an eating contest either.

She put the sweatshirt back down and closed the curtain. "All right. I'm out."

Jack couldn't help but sigh in empathy. "Carter…"

"Sir, I'm worried about the results, yes. But I meant it when I said that I don't want people talking behind my back." She moved and sat down on a bench. "I've worked hard for my job. But along the way, there were always people who whispered about how I must have slept my way to the top. It didn't stop when I got transferred to the SGC. It actually got worse."

Jack sat down next to her. "Carter, we deal with all kinds of crazy crap through the Stargate. Nobody that has known you for the past eight years would accuse you of that, especially in these circumstances. And they would hurt anyone who does."

Sam looked up, still not looking completely convinced.

Jack bit his lip. "Most people are going to be coming up to you like they normally do, wanting a piece of your mind. They aren't going to be focusing on your stomach." He quickly leaned over and looked at her feet. "Or your ankles."

She laughed and followed suit.

"They're always going to see you. Samantha Carter, world class genius. Just like I do."

She brought her head back up and looked at him in earnest, evaluating his face. There was nothing dishonest in what he said, and she knew that.

She just had to understand it.

She smiled warmly. "Thanks, sir. I needed that."

He patted her shoulder. "That's what I'm here for."

The phone on the wall rang, and he motioned for her to remain seated while he answered. "O'Neill. Yeah. Uh-huh. Okay, we'll be there in a minute."

When he hung up, Carter was looking intently at him. "What?"

He turned, then pointed behind him at the phone. "That was Frasier. Results are in. Said she wants to see us both."

Carter raised her eyebrows, then stood up slowly. "Well, let's get this over with."


As Sam walked to Janet's office, General O'Neill stayed with her, protectively glaring at anyone who got in the way or started to ask questions. And she appreciated it. The scientist in her wanted to know how this baby just magically appeared within her. The Air Force colonel wanted to know if this could be a threat.

The woman in her was scared to death.

As her office door came into view, Sam began to slow, but she felt his hand on her shoulder, gently guiding her inside.

She resisted for a moment, turning to face him, full of dread.

"It's gonna be okay. Probably not the wackiest thing that we've ever encountered, right?"

Sam exhaled heavily. "Right," she repeated, trying to persuade herself that the idea was true.

O'Neill tapped on the door. "You wanted to see us?"

Janet Frasier looked up from her desk. "Come on in. Have a seat."

As Sam sat down, Jack stayed standing. "So, what's up?"

Frasier raised her eyebrows as she pulled a file folder from her desktop. "Based on the amniocentesis procedure that I performed on Sam, the genetic material of the fetus is 100% human. And a match to her DNA."

"All of it? Like a clone?" Sam replied.

Janet slowly shook her head. "No, there's a Y chromosome, which indicates a father."

"And … it's a boy," Sam slowly whispered, hanging her head.

Jack remembered enough from his high school biology class to recall where the Y came from. He held a fist up to his mouth in worry.

"I was able to extract enough material to run a paternity test. I ran it through the military database, specifically active duty personnel here at the SGC." She opened the folder, then her eyes suddenly widened.

"Doc?"

Janet looked up, mouth agape as she tried to find words. "I hadn't examined the results. I was waiting for you to come in."

"Janet." Sam's firm call of her name seemed to sober her up, and she raised her head straight, turning the paperwork around so that Sam could see it.

"The DNA is a match to General Jack O'Neill."

Sam's head turned so quickly that she was amazed it didn't fall off.

Jack stood behind the other chair, arms crossed, looking expectant, but as the news sunk in, his arms dropped. And so did his jaw. "Excuse me?"

"You're the father," Janet slowly said.

"No I'm not," Jack retorted, staring back at Carter.

"Sir, the tests are conclusive. If we were in a court of law, you would be declared the father with no room for doubt."

"It's against regulations!" Jack cried out.

Sam just shook her head. "You've gotta be kidding me," she murmured, more to herself in shock than in regards to O'Neill's outburst.

"General, with all due respect, there isn't any indication that this baby was made the usual way. Especially considering its growth rate. But the tests are irrefutable."

"No, no. Doc, I know you've been doing this for a while, but are you sure this was the right test?"

"Yes, General, I am," she replied firmly.

Sam stood up and held up a hand. "Sir, for the love of God, back off."

"Carter, I just got told by Doc Frasier that I knocked you up when I've never even knocked. I'm allowed to be a little cynical."

"Keep in mind that you're not the one who's carrying her commanding officer's baby," Sam replied sternly, neglecting to tack on a "sir" at the end and not caring.

"Before we get all riled up, anymore than we already are," Janet interjected, throwing a pointed glare at both of them, "can you think of any possible explanation?"

Jack just shook his head. He sat down, propped his elbows on the table and folded his hands over his mouth. "Nada."

Then it hit Carter like a lightning strike. "The trinium."

They turned to face her. "The other lifeform."

"Back me up, Carter."

She turned to look at him. "When we were on 482, we detected another life sign but dismissed it, attributing it to the large amount of flora on the planet. The location with the highest concentrations was the trinium caves."

Jack paused to process. "You think you're pregnant because of a tree?"

Sam shrugged. "It's possible. Think about it: how do plants normally reproduce? The seedlings from one blow to another, or a bee carries the pollen to another flower and pollinates it. Maybe I'm the bee. The life form blew to me and somehow impregnated me."

"That may be, but it still doesn't explain how the general is the biological father, or why the DNA is human instead of flora," Janet objected.

Then O'Neill lifted his head straight up. "That annoying lightning bug."

"What bug?" Janet asked, curiously glancing between the two officers.

"It looked almost like a lightning bug. I literally thought one passed through me. It disappeared when it hit my vest, then I turned around and saw it there."

"That happened to me too," Sam said. "That was the reason why we returned so early. I was startled because it reminded me of the energy based lifeforms that we encountered four years ago at an offworld base. Except that they swarmed one of the scientists and killed him. They didn't seem to have that effect. Just … extreme discomfort," she added, wriggling in her seat.

Janet nodded. "Then this – thing – passed through the general, collected his genetic material, then entered Sam, deposited it, and began the process of reproduction." She shook her head but chuckled lightly. "Despite this being one of the craziest theories I've ever heard, it also sounds the most plausible."

"But why would it do that? And why is the fetus growing so fast?" Sam wondered.

"That I can't explain. But in any case, we will have a baby here in roughly ten days." Janet looked between them. "I know it's not what you were planning on, but you'd better start thinking about how you're going to take care of this baby."


"So. Wow."

Carter nodded at his short statement, seemingly unable to voice any coherent thoughts of her own. "Yeah."

They turned down the corridor and headed for the elevator.

"You should go home. It's your day off, anyway. For cryin' out loud, you're supposed to be 2,000 miles away this week."

"Yeah, I don't think a bikini is gonna look too good on me right now."

"You'd be surprised," Jack tried to mutter quietly under his breath, but apparently it wasn't quiet enough.

Sam elbowed him.

"Anyhow, I'm already here, and give my current state, I don't feel like going home right now. So I'm going to go hide out in my lab."

"Sure you don't want any blue jello?"

She smiled. "Maybe later. For now, I'm just trying to make sure that breakfast stays down."

As the elevator enveloped her and took her up to level 19, Jack turned on his heel and headed to the mess hall, hands shoved forlornly in his pockets. The isolation allowed him a moment with his thoughts. His mind was throbbing with the implications. Through very unnatural causes, he was going to be a father again.

And, ironically, with the woman he cared too much about but could never be with.

"Oh, the irony," he half mumbled to himself as he rounded a corner.

"What's that, Jack?"

He stopped in his tracks as Daniel and Teal'c came up behind him from a side corridor, dressed in normal BDUs.

"I thought you guys went back to 482."

"We did, but a massive monsoon set in last night so we gated back. Once it dries out a little, we'll head back." Daniel glanced at him. "So, did we miss anything exciting?"

Little did the archeologist know how spot on his question was.

Jack couldn't stop himself.

"Well, due to immaculate conception from a frickin' lightning bug, Carter is now three months pregnant, and I'm the father. Any questions?"

And with that, he walked back towards the mess hall.


A/N: Next chapter is in the works! Thanks for reading!