PART III: It's Not Easy Being Green
Bruce insisted that he and Darcy be left alone in a private conference room to watch the security footage of Darcy's first transformation. He knew how it felt to be so exposed, to have everyone see the dark primal things that pulsed inside you like a nerve, and he wanted to spare Darcy as much trauma as possible.
He told the SHIELD agents that it was because he was afraid watching the video might trigger another episode, and he was the only one who they could guarantee wouldn't be hurt if She Hulk turned violent. And that was true, but it was far from the only reason.
Bruce was responsible. This had happened to Darcy because of his blood, because she was an assistant in his lab, and he just… he had to do anything he could to make this easier for her.
They watched in silence, both of them dressed in SHIELD issued sweats, Bruce keeping Darcy in his peripheral vision.
On the screen, Hawkeye had just shot both hulks with a tranquilizer. They fell one after the other and began to shrink, and the footage froze.
There was a heavy silence, and Bruce prepared himself to try to be comforting if Darcy started crying or to deal with a transformation if that was how she reacted.
"Dude," Darcy said, "your hulk totally has a crush on my hulk."
Bruce's mouth dropped open. "What?"
Darcy looked at him and smiled, bumping her shoulder against his. Her smile was strained, her skin ashy, but she was trying. She was amazing.
"Don't even try to deny it, B-man. Your hulk is crushing on my hulk so hard. He was so giving her puppy eyes."
Bruce returned her smile. If she was going to be brave, he wouldn't ruin it for her. "Well, She Hulk is something else. She seems to have higher cognitive function than the Other Guy, err, Man Hulk does. Or at least, more than he did when he first… manifested."
"Maybe it's a male-female thing?" Darcy suggested, fiddling with a strand of her hair. "I remember in my freshman psychology class, there being something about women having a greater facility for language development, especially at a young age? Maybe it's just like… my hulk is better at talking, but yours is better at smashing and spatial reasoning?"
Bruce fiddled with his glasses. "That is… an excellent point. It's very possible. I never thought to approach studying the Other Guy from a developmental psychology perspective."
"Don't sound so surprised, Doc. I'm not a genius, but I do alright."
Darcy's smile was gone now. Her shoulders slumped. She looked so very small, and young.
"Darcy," Bruce put his hand over hers. Soon, when word got around, people would hesitate to touch her. There would always be a bubble of space around her, and she would start to expect it. Would start to be startled by anyone being close. Bruce didn't want that for her. He'd offer her what he could. She, at least, would always have him. He would never be afraid of her like everyone else. He wouldn't shy from holding her hand or giving her a hug.
"I'm tired," Darcy said before Bruce could tell her just how smart he thought she was. "I know that you need to be like, my Jedi Master and Yoda me up or whatever, and we need to figure out what turns me mean and green and be debriefed and a million other things. But can we do that later? Right now, I just really want to go home."
Bruce sighed. "You can't go back to your apartment – "
Darcy hunched in on herself further. Bruce squeezed her hand. "But Tony's built a containment room for the Other Guy in the tower. There's a little apartment attached to it, where I stay if I feel the need."
Darcy looked up. "I can stay there? And you'll stay with me?"
Bruce nodded. "Whatever you need, Darcy."
She hugged him, and Bruce found himself holding her tight. He'd thought about how she might feel in his arms a lot over the time she'd worked for them in the lab, but he'd never let it go farther than a few errant thoughts. She was a beautiful woman with a wicked sense of humor and a smile that could light up a whole room – who wouldn't think about touching her from time to time? But it had been too dangerous, would have been too selfish of him to actually entertain those kinds of ideas.
But now? Well, Darcy was the only woman in the world who was safe from him, and he was the only man in the world who could handle her.
He absolutely refused to chase that train of thought to the logical conclusion. He was not happy Darcy had been given the serum. He wasn't. He had never wanted anyone to have to deal with his demons, and he was especially sorry that it was beautiful, funny Darcy who was clinging to him and shaking a little.
Bruce subtly sniffed her hair and hated himself for it.
-l-
Bruce left Darcy in their shared room at SHIELD medical while he went to arrange transportation for them to Avengers Tower. Tony was happy to send a car, but Bruce had his work cut out for him getting Fury to agree to let Darcy leave the base. And it was even more difficult to convince the Director that a heavily armed escort would not be necessary. Bruce finally had to imply that a convoy of agents would just result in setting two rage monsters loose on the city.
"You're all used to me," Bruce tried to explain, running his hands through his hair and taking deep breaths in through his nose. "I've had years to learn control, and I still have… episodes where I don't mean to transform. Darcy is entirely new at this. We don't know what triggers her, we don't know how much, if any, control she'll be able to have over it, and we don't know how She Hulk might react if she feels threatened."
"Those all sound like good reasons to keep her contained here."
Behind Bruce, the door to Fury's office opened, and Tony and Thor strode in.
"I told them you were in a meeting, Director," Fury's secretary called from the doorway. Fury waved his hand at her, rolling his one good eye.
"I'm inclined to think She Hulk won't hurt anyone without provocation," Tony said, jumping straight into the conversation. He'd probably been eavesdropping somehow. "And I also think that since Bruce is the only other Grumpy Green Giant on the planet, we should listen to what he has to say."
"Just because they treat you like a lava lamp, Stark, doesn't mean they aren't dangerous to other people." Fury riveted his one eye on Bruce. "I can't let her leave base. The medical team – "
The Other Guy surged to the forefront of Bruce's mind, Protect She Hulk rattling around his brain.
Bruce slammed his hands down on Fury's desk. "Let me make this clear," he said in a low voice. "Either you let Darcy leave the base, or you won't have a base to keep her on."
Fury stopped talking. Tony's hand landed on Bruce's shoulder, giving it a squeeze. Bruce didn't turn to look at him.
A tense silence stretched between them, filled only with their battle of wills.
Finally, Thor said, "The Lady Darcy has ever been a sister to me, and I am strong enough to stand against her until she learns to control her new abilities. I will escort her wherever she needs to go."
And with that, Thor turned and walked out, as if his word was enough to make it happen.
Tony snorted. "Ladies and gentlemen, the king has left the building."
Bruce rolled his eyes, but gave Tony a wry smile.
-l-
When they returned to Darcy's room, they found She Hulk sitting quietly on the flattened remains of another bed. She'd fortunately turned the thin hospital blankets into a kind of toga dress. It was bad enough for Bruce to end up shirtless, wearing rags. It was worse for Darcy.
It seemed he had new incentive to find or invent some kind of clothing that would last through a transformation.
But to the matter at hand.
Bruce glanced around. It looked like Darcy had transformed on the bed, crushing it, and She Hulk had made herself a dress, but otherwise not moved. The medical staff weren't even aware that She Hulk had put in an appearance.
Huh.
Thor and Tony stayed back by the door, ready to call a Code Green, while Bruce slowly approached the bed.
"Hi, She Hulk," Bruce addressed her.
She Hulk looked at him and smiled, and Bruce was startled by how much she looked like Darcy. The smile was a bit more ferocious than usual, but not by much. Was this how he looked to other people? Like himself just… bigger and green?
She Hulk pretty, Man Hulk informed Bruce.
She Hulk inhaled deeply, then snorted. "Man Hulk," she said. "Why puny?"
Bruce temporarily couldn't speak. His thoughts were spinning in too many directions at once – the implications of her remembering things that happened from episode to episode; her obvious at least partial exchange of knowledge with Darcy; her recognition that he and Man Hulk were the same; that she might have identified him by scent; in what ways her abilities might differ from Man Hulk's, and how many of the differences would be predicated on gender or the different circumstances surrounding their manifestation….
"Oh," Bruce said when She Hulk growled at him impatiently. "I'm Bruce right now. Just like how you're sometimes Darcy."
She Hulk took a moment to think that over. Then she nodded. "Darcy get scared, She Hulk come so Darcy not be scared. She Hulk go to sleep, Darcy come back. Man Hulk come when Bruce get scared?"
Fear? Fear was Darcy's trigger, rather than anger? Bruce wasn't sure if that was better or worse. Only time would tell.
"Something like that," Bruce told She Hulk, edging closer to her with the vague idea of taking some readings since she seemed so cooperative. "Man Hulk comes when I get angry. Was Darcy scared? Is that why you're here now?"
Noticing his not-as-subtle-as-he-thought approach, She Hulk scooped him up in one arm and sat him in her lap. Then she started to pet his hair, much as he'd seen her do to Tony in the security video. Bruce felt himself blush as he tried not to get a face full of cleavage. "Darcy get scared when Bruce leave. She Hulk come. No one here. She Hulk wait for Bruce to come back."
"And you didn't smash anything?"
She Hulk started to stroke her hand from the top of Bruce's head all the way down his spine, like he was a particularly strange breed of lapdog. It was weirdly nice. Bruce tried not to think about it.
She Hulk gave him a look. "Why smash? She Hulk not stupid like Man Hulk. She Hulk not stupid like Bruce. Not smash everything. She Hulk do what Darcy scared to do. She Hulk be like Black Widow."
Bruce had to do some yoga breathing to stave off his excitement, to keep his heart from beating fast enough to trigger a transformation. He was just so relieved that so far, Darcy's alter ego seemed much more manageable than his own. "So you'd let Black Widow teach you what to smash and what not to smash?"
She Hulk put on her thinking face again, a crease between her dark brows and her plump, green lips puckered. Then she nodded. "She Hulk be like Black Widow." She gave Bruce another of her terrifying smiles. "Bruce like pets? Man Hulk like pets. Is good. She Hulk like to give pets. Darcy like to give pets, but too scared, so She Hulk do it."
"Pets?"
She Hulk nodded and pointedly stroked her hand down Bruce's back. Flustered, Bruce squirmed in her lap and said, "Oh, uh. Thank you. It's nice."
Sniggering from the direction of the door made Bruce remember that Tony was listening. He squeezed his eyes shut and pinched the bridge of his nose.
"She Hulk, do you think you could let Darcy come back now?" Bruce asked in as even a voice as he could manage.
She Hulk stopped petting him. "Bruce not like She Hulk?"
There was a dangerous edge there. Bruce hastened to reassure her. "No, no, I like you! It's just that we need to go somewhere, and you're a little too big to fit in the car this way."
She Hulk squinted at him and breathed deeply, and Bruce got the uncanny sensation that she'd be able to tell if he was lying. But she appeared satisfied with the answer he gave. "Is okay. She Hulk like Man Hulk have big arms. Strong. She Hulk like strong. Darcy like Bruce have fluffy hair. Is fair. Sharing."
And with that, She Hulk started to shrink at such a rapid rate that Bruce didn't have time to move or steady himself. Instead, he wound up sprawled over a mostly naked Darcy, who frowned up at him. "What?" she asked.
Then the stress on her body took its toll, and she passed out.
-l-
It seemed that all Darcy had done lately was wake up places without any idea how she'd gotten there. She wasn't in SHIELD medical anymore. Nope, now she was ensconced in the center of an enormous squishy bed, in what appeared to be a luxury apartment. Hey, maybe the whole kidnapping and She Hulk thing was just a dream, and she really did just drink too much and go home with some dude. Maybe she slept with Tony. She could be totally fine with having slept with Tony. It would be super awkward, but still…
But when she flung the blankets off, she found she was dressed in a set of SHIELD issue sweats, so that pointed to the whole She Hulk thing being a Thing That Happened, and that meant she could hulk out any second and hurt people and she was probably going to suck at controlling it because she'd never really been good at being still, and it seemed like deep meditation would require being still and Bruce would probably get annoyed with having to help her eventually and –
The bedroom door opened and Bruce entered. He'd changed into a pair of grey pajama pants and a purple t-shirt. Purple looked good on him.
"JARVIS told me you were awake," Bruce said, coming to sit on the bed. He was watching her carefully, like she might be about to hulk out, which just made Darcy feel like a time bomb. Seriously, if he kept looking at her like that she was going to start freaking out, then she was going to hulk out and then he would have to hulk out and –
"Darcy," Bruce said in his calmest Zen voice. "We're in the sub-basement of the tower. The walls are reinforced adamantium. If we leave this apartment, there's plenty of space for both of our, um, hulks to be contained until we change back. You're safe here. Other people are safe from us here."
Darcy didn't realize she'd been gasping for air until she started calming down, taking deeper breaths.
It was all going to be fine. Bruce said so, and Bruce was pretty much as good as Thor at this point. Darcy let out a long sigh and buried her face in her hands.
"Sorry for being such a spaz. I'd say it won't happen again, but it probably will."
The mattress dipped as Bruce shifted closer to her. His hand was warm on her back, even through her clothes. He stroked his fingers up and down her spine, occasionally making little circles with his thumb. If Darcy hadn't been so exhausted, it probably would have been sexy. As it was, it was really soothing.
"You're not a spaz, Darcy. You're doing a lot better than anyone could expect."
Bruce had never touched her before. Darcy wondered if it was because he wasn't as afraid of hurting her now that she had her own personal hulk, or if he was just trying to keep her calm. Did he mind?
Well whatever. He better not mind. She was awesome, and she had an awesome rack, even in hulk form, and she deserved hugs. Deciding to take the back stroking as permission, Darcy plastered herself to Bruce's side, burying her face in his chest and breathing him in. He smelled nice, like soap and the Science Sisters Lab. Maybe other people wouldn't like Lab Smell, but Darcy had been indoctrinated to the point of associating it with good things like kittens and cookies.
Bruce went stiff and Darcy looked up at him, lip caught between her teeth, daring him to push her away. Bruce smiled tightly, resuming stroking her back. "Sorry," he said. "I'm not used to…" he shrugged.
It was cool. Darcy got it. Bruce was normally very No Touchy for good, Hulk-shaped reasons, which she had tried to respect despite being a naturally tactile person. Tony was the only one who routinely got all up in Bruce's space, and that was twenty percent showing Bruce he had better control than he thought, thirty percent trying to make sure Bruce knew he was wanted, and fifty percent Tony wanting to have Bruce's Science Babies, Darcy was pretty sure.
"Yeah, I know," Darcy told him. "I guess I'll have to get used to that too. You know. Having a bigger personal space bubble. But hey, at least I can still be all over you, right?"
Bruce's arm sort of spasmed, like seriously he was having a localized seizure. Darcy watched his face. "Unless you don't want me to? I mean, I always figured the no touching thing you had going on was because of the Hulk. Man Hulk, I mean. But since I'm pretty hulky myself now, I'm safe to touch, right? Cause even if you get surprised or horny or whatever and hulk out, I can just counter-hulk out and be totally fine."
Now Bruce sounded like he was choking, and he was blushing. Darcy'd made sophisticated science genius Bruce Banner blush. Score!
"Horny? How did you…? That was never made public knowledge."
Darcy laughed at him. "Dude, I spend a lot of time on the internet. A. Lot. You don't know what else people post about the Avengers."
Now Bruce had New Discovery-face. It was a mixture of horror and curiosity, with a sprinkling of wonder. "People on the internet theorize about my sex life?"
Darcy shrugged. "I know, right."
-l-
Bruce insisted that Darcy have the bed and that he'd be fine on the couch. After Darcy saw the couch, and how comfy it was, she stopped arguing with him. Neither of them were hungry, and apparently it was late, so after Bruce showed Darcy how to flee into the Hulk Containment Area in the event of freak out, they retreated to their separate rooms and went to sleep.
Darcy had nightmares.
She couldn't remember what they were about when she woke up, but she knew they had to be pretty bad since she got up three times on the verge of a hulk out and went to stare at Bruce like a creeper until she calmed down. Somehow, in the past twenty-four hours, he'd become her safe place.
Eventually she gave up on going back to bed, owned up to the fact that she was apparently Edward Cullen now, and watched Bruce sleep.
He looked cute, all curled in on himself, his hands tucked under his chin. Bruce scrunched himself up in sleep, like he was trying to take up the least amount of space possible. His fluffy mad scientist hair was sticking up every which way.
Darcy started to smooth it back, but stopped herself before her fingers could make contact. There was creepy sleep watching, and then there was Creepy Sleep Watching. She needed to not cross that line.
Bruce like pets, She Hulk's voice rumbled in Darcy's head.
"Fuck it," Darcy muttered.
She sat down on the couch, pulled Bruce's head into her lap, and stroked his hair.
