The group downgraded from 5 cars to Dale's RV, Merle's motorbike, and a station wagon. The fuel was ciphered out from the extra cars and transferred into the vehicles they were left with that could facilitate the kind of fuel they had. Daryl had decided he wanted to ride Merle's motorbike, up ahead, and refused to let anyone else ride it, even though there were others who knew how. She couldn't blame him, it was all he had left of Merle at that point. Cassia herself was back in the stuffy RV with a lot of the others, her main preoccupation was entertaining Sophia; who was very very interested in the small life growing inside of Cassia. Countless questions were fired her way at impressive speed and with no sign of relenting anytime soon. Carol seemed to appreciate Cassia's patience and steady, appropriate replies. She only intercepted occasionally, seemingly content to allow Cassia to respond as she wished. After a short while she appeared to trust Cassia's judgement and simply sat back, adding to some answers, occasionally. It was a pretty serene atmosphere.
A little while later, they'd all stopped for a brief rest, the RV's shade cover had been pulled out and a tiny little table and chairs set had been set up outside. Daryl was lounging around in the chair next to Cassia's and Sophia was lingering by Cassie's other side, eventually Cass just pulled the slim little girl onto her lap, telling her to mind the bump. Sophia perched right on the very edge of her lap and was very overly cautious about spacing herself from it. It was very endearing. Sophia continued to be endearing until she asked the very question that every adult dreaded,
"How was your baby made?"
Cassia froze. Daryl choked on nothing but his own saliva and pitched forward in his chair. Cassia couldn't help but feel he was overreacting just a little. He wouldn't even have to be the one to answer. Right. Oh, that's right. She had to answer. Cassia licked her lips and remained silent while she tried to piece an appropriate answer together. How had it fallen to her to give someone else's kid the talk?
Daryl did not seem very sympathetic to her plight, as he deliberately ignored the the panicked look she sent his way. Sophia cocked her head at their reactions, unfortunately, her curiosity had been piqued and now was more insistent on an answer than ever, "What's wrong with Daryl?"
"He, uh-" Cassie shot Daryl a look, floundering for words, feeling isolated and lost at sea. He shifted about uncomfortably and then sighed,
"I've got a cough, Soph," he grumbled, averting his gaze off to where Andrea and Dale were squabbling about something inconsequential. Sophia frowned.
"Oh."
Cassia prayed the young girl had forgotten her previous inquiry.
She hadn't.
"You didn't answer my question."
"Well... um, maybe that's something you should ask your mama?" She tried, sweeping her gaze across the camp, searching desperately for the short grey hair that was always the most reliable indicator of Carol.
She was nowhere in sight. How was she nowhere in sight?
Lord save us from this child and her curious inklings.
"I want you to tell me, Cassie. Please?" She whined the latter part of her sentence like kids did in movies. It grated on her every nerve. Daryl's eye twitched a little.
"Sometimes... when two people love each other very much-" She started, then frowned. Daryl had raised an eyebrow. Cassia faltered and failed to go on. She hummed as she pondered, and then tried again, "Sophia, you shouldn't grow a baby in your belly until you're ready to and you're with someone you love."
"It takes two people?"
"Yes, indeed."
"Who helped you?"
Cassia looked towards Daryl, who was now completely turned around in his seat so that his back was facing them, trying to appear as if he were joining Dale in his mission to keep watch for walkers.
"Daryl helped me." She knew what the following question to be, but she couldn't find the strength or resolve to lie to the little girl.
"Are you and Daryl in love? Mummy said you weren't."
"... No. We're not in love."
Daryl cleared his throat, his foot was tapping dangerously fast against the leg of the table. His embarrassment and discomfort was practically a physical presence amongst them. Cassia, herself, cringed. Sophia frowned,
"But you said that-"
"I know what I said, Sophia."
"But... is your baby growing in your belly a mistake, then?"
"I... no." She was unexpectedly affected by that. She quaked a little with the ferocity of her reply. Sophia looked a little taken aback. There was only so much skirting around the subject Cassia could do. She sighed and leaned forward a little, looking Sophia directly in the eye, "Look, Sophia, sometimes these things happen by accident. It's not always something you can avoid or control, but that doesn't mean it's a mistake. If you accidentally spilled a cup of water over some flowers, that's a good accident, right? Do you see?"
Sophia evidently liked that answer, as she smiled and nodded. A few of her teeth were still missing. A few were in the process of re-growing. She was at that age where the tooth fairy was still a thing, and Santa wasn't a fanciful mascot.
"Daryl?" She piped up, suddenly. You could see the idea for her next question appear on her naive, pretty face. Daryl sighed uncomfortably, and full of reluctance, fidgeted about until Sophia could see his face. He was still angled away from them a little, in the heat it was hard to tell if his face was red because of the conversation, or because of the temperature. Sophia waited patiently for him, and then posed the rest of her question, "Do you love Cassia?"
Daryl sighed heavily and dragged a hand down his face, stress twitching at his muscles, he shook his head and then got up and disappeared.
Sophia blinked and looked up to examine Cassia's face. For a moment the little girl looked full of melancholy and sympathy and her eyes were wise far beyond her years.
Cassia rubbed at Sophia's back and gave her a little smile.
Why did her own chest feel so heavy?
They hadn't been continuing on for long after that when the RV groaned, shuddered, wheezed and came to an inevitable, halting stop. Dale cursed. Sophia covered her own ears. Cassia snickered and exchanged a look with Andrea. To her surprise, Andrea didn't return it and almost looked as if she were glaring, sharply turning her head away to stare disinterestedly out of the window. Oh. Well, then.
She couldn't claim to be too bothered by it.
Daryl circled back around the RV once and then parked up to it's right. Everyone piled off of the RV and the others squeezed out of the station wagon. Dale made his way around to the front and opened it up to examine the engine. He was only there for a few minutes more before he returned to them. Carl's questioning of his dad hadn't even managed to start before Dale announced they'd get the RV no further without a new radiator hose. Great.
"I said it, didn't I say it?" Dale was muttering to himself, apparently not aware that everyone was still watching and/or listening to him, "I've said it a thousand times, again and again; dead in the water."
"Problem, Dale?" Oh, joy. Now it was Shane's turn to join in. Wonderful. Because, of course, what everyone conversation about doom needs is Shane to get involved with it. She huffed to herself, folding her arms over her chest.
"Oh, just the small matter of being in the middle of nowhere with the dead walking and no hope of-" Dale abruptly ends his sentence, thinking better of it once taking in the seemingly endless pile up of cars ahead of them. As soon as his voice had cut out the haunting silence was everything and the only thing to be heard. No walkers. No life beyond them. Nothing. Dale cleared his throat, "Okay... that was dumb."
Shane nods in obnoxious agreement, "If we can't find a damn radiator hose here..." he and Rick actually share a small grin. On a list of things Cassia had not been expecting today, that had been pretty far up there - coming just above the ginormous ex-traffic jam, and just below Merle. The way things were heading, she wouldn't be surprised if Merle himself were to actually, miraculously step out of one of the cars up ahead and demand his motorbike back. A teeny tiny smile graced her features for a moment, and then she realised that no, Merle would not be showing up out of nowhere, and no, she could not will him into existence. As usual, Daryl's suddenly a lot closer to Cassia than she expected him to be, and she startles a little when he voices his quiet, gruff opinion,
"There's a whole bunch of stuff we could find," He'd actually pulled Merle's motorbike up pretty much dead centre in the free spot next to Cassia. It looked odd just surrounded by the other members of the group, like that. Why didn't he just get off it? Cassia shook her head unknowingly, pushed to do so by shock and disbelief. What next? Griffons?
Cassia glanced up, peering at the sky, just in case. Hmm, she thought, I think I really am starting to lose it.
"Siphon some fuel from these cars for a start," adds T-Dog, who is also standing right next to Cassia. When the hell had he gotten there? She hoped no-one was noticing how much she was flinching and whipping her head around, like a moron. Although, she supposed she could just blame it on a mixture of dehydration and 'pregnancy brain'.
"Maybe some water?" Calls out Carol, thankfully from further away than the last two.
"Food?" Suggests Glenn, also far enough away not to cause any alarm. Cassia sent him a cheerful little smile, which he returned after a moment or two of suspicious contemplation. For some reason, he always seemed to assume she was trying to trick him or get him in trouble. She wasn't sure if it was something to do with her gender, her personality or the fact she was pregnant. He reacted pretty normally towards Carol and Andrea and Sophia, and from what she'd seen of his interactions with Amy he'd been pretty normal, so she was just going to peg it down to the pregnancy thing. Poor guy. Glenn had probably heard tale after tale of hormonal monsters.
"This is a graveyard... I don't know how I feel about this," says Lori, suddenly, quietly, eyes centered on Rick. Cassia frowned a little and tilted her head. Daryl recognised the stance she'd taken up and reached out to try and stop her but she'd already started speaking,
"Where did you think your shirt came from?" She questioned, calmly. Lori narrowed her eyes and tilted her chin up and opened her mouth to retaliate, but Rick's speaking up, louder than either her or Lori had been, interrupting the hostile back and forths before they could begin,
"Alright, alright. You don't have to touch anythin', Lori, but the rest of us are gonna go ahead, alright?"
Lori nodded very stiffly, keeping Carl close to her chest. She really knew how to smother and coddle that boy. Cassia kept her snide comments to herself and wandered off, weaving between cars to explore. She didn't get all that far, actually, when Daryl's hand caught her by the arm, stopping her in her conquest. She swiveled round with an eyebrow already raised, and he held out a knife,
"For the one you lost," he informed her, and then cut her off before she could say thank you, and simply walked away. Cassia stared after him with a quizzical alteration to her usually calm and collected exterior. Well, I'll be damned.
After a little scavenging around in the first few cars she ventures over to, she uncovers a small treasure trove; a Lara Croft style leather glove, some boiled sweets, a first aid kit and a loose box of plasters, some partly there felt tip pens, a dog-eared colouring book and some odd socks. She briefly considers that it might make more sense, practically, for her to pile everything up and carry it over to the RV all in one go, but the result is too heavy when combined with the cooler and three mix-matched pairs of trainers she finds next, in quick succession. So, sensibly, she decides to transfer them over to the RV in three installments. Somberly, she notes that Val would have been very proud of her, for taking such a sensible initiative. Daryl's not too far off, a little more than half of his torso is submerged in the boot of the car he's investigating, and when the back of his shirt lifts up high enough she thinks she can spot the lowest edge of one of his scars. Cassia's lips curled down at the corners of their own accord, and she suddenly feels heavy and emotional, though her arms are empty and she'd been perfectly fine right up until then. She'd only known him for a few months, but she already knows he has never ever deserved those scars. Never. With an immense amount of effort, Cassia dragged her attention anyway from Daryl, and glanced towards the children, instead. Sophia and Carl weren't too far away from where she was, herself, clearly enjoying the liberation from the RV and the station wagon. Lori was watching her son like a hawk, looking back to make sure he was there every few minutes. Honestly, Cassia couldn't quite fault her for it, she was beginning to understand the paranoia and worries of motherhood, especially in a time such as this. No, Lori was quite right to be vigilant.
Just as Cassia was thinking that, Shane caught her by the wrist and tugged her very harshly behind a car, ducking down into a crouch. So much for vigilance, she thought to herself, a little bitter along with the fact. She shot Shane a confrontational and slightly wary look, but he brushed it off and pointed rather urgently towards the small horde of walkers that weren't actually far off at all and were very soon to be in their midst. Ah. So Shane was saving her. That was... unexpected. She'd never really been kind towards him. Although... she would never wish for him to die if it could be avoided. Perhaps it was the same on the switch-side.
"We gotta get below the car, Cassie," he hissed to her, leaning close enough so that only she could hear him. Cass' eyes widened and she shook her head fervently,
"I can't go under on my front. It'll harm the baby," she hissed back and his mouth popped into a small, perfect little 'o' shape. Shane gritted his teeth and glanced around them, daring to poke his head up above the car for a quarter of a millisecond to judge where the walkers were, and then ducked back down to whisper his solution,
"We'll get you under on your back, yeah?" She took the extremely brief moment she had available to visualise it and then nodded, watching him and then assessing their surroundings to make sure they were safe while he shimmied his way under. The horrible groaning, moaning and wheezing (and the telltale dragging of broken body parts) was getting closer and closer, and their margin for safety was thinning very swiftly. She quickly maneuvered herself down onto her back, and reached her arm out for Shane, his hand darted out and secured itself around her upper forearm, getting a good, steady hold, and she held onto his own upper forearm with her own hand, and then they worked together to get her under the car and right up next to him, side by side, pressed together as close as was possible. It wasn't exactly comfortable, but it was much preferable to being torn open in the middle of the high way. Please let the children be safe, she prayed. Shadows were obscuring Shane's face a lot of the time, and she could only see him when his head was in certain positions, or when it was facing her. It was clear he was trying to keep an eye on everyone and determine where people were and every now and then she thought she could hear him counting. It was reassuring when he finally reached the number of people who had been outside.
Wait... no, he hadn't. An horrible, uncomfortable feeling of trepidation started to unfurl in the very pit of her stomach and she whispered to him very urgently below her breath,
"Who's missing?"
"T-Dog," he hissed back, turning his head back shortly afterwards and, from what she could tell, he was now craning it, trying to see further down, "he was down by Daryl, right?"
"Yeah..." She gulped, licked her lips, "have you seen Daryl?"
It looked like he nodded, "Yeah, he's darted about a few times, dragged a walker across at one point." Cassia breathed a sigh of relief and nodded shortly,
"That's where T-Dog will be, then."
"Huh?"
"Under the walker."
Cassia visualised Shane opening his mouth in the small 'o' shape again, in the silence that followed. Eventually, the horde moved on, and silence returned. That was until Sophia's alarmed shriek and the sound of snarling and groaning and running around disrupts the peace. Shane immediately slides out and is gone, leaving her there. A load of feet pound past, running by in what she assumes must be in pursuit of Sophia, and she struggles with getting herself out on her own for a bit, but she's too far under and she's too pregnant to manage it easily now. Eventually, Carl's little face appears sideways on her side of the car and is clearly shocked to see her. He's holding a particularly sharp twig, as if prepared to kill her with it, if it were to turn out she was a walker. Cassia blinks at him, and he drops the twig, helping her out instead. Carl gets her out, and she gets to her feet, dusting herself down,
"Sophia's gone-" He tells Cassia, telling her something she already knows and pointing towards a very slight opening amongst the layer of trees by the roadside. A gaggle of the women are stood by the roadside barrier. She hurries over to meet them.
Sophia's lost, and she feels it like a never ending succession of piano's falling on her from a skyscraper. Her heart wrenches and all she can do is put an arm around Carol while the poor woman weeps. Rick and Daryl go off to look for Sophia. She was supposed to meet me back at the highway, Rick had explained, She was supposed to follow the trees to the left. I don't know where she is but she's not by the stream.
All the rest of them can do is look for supplies.
They go to sleep that night and Sophia's still missing. Carol never stops crying and Cassia doesn't get much sleep at all, though she doesn't really care, not as long as that little girl is lost and alone in the woods. Not while Carol's feeling helpless and terrified for the fate of her only daughter. Not while Daryl hasn't slept at all.
Andrea's grouchy and moody and spiteful from the get-go, the next morning. She glares at everyone the moment they wake up and has a loud, seething argument with Dale right by the door to the RV; meaning that no-one could go in to the RV to escape them, and no-one inside the RV could get out to get away from them. It's awful to hear them arguing about death and suicide and bonds the way they were when Carol was sitting next to her, softly weeping and resting her head on Cassia's shoulder. Cassia dragged a weary arm around Carol's slight frame and tugged the poor woman closer. She was trembling and her frame was very thin, very skeletal. It was worrying, to say the least. Or, rather, did everyone feel like this now? Had they all shed the weight the same way a cat sheds it's hair in the past few months they'd all been surviving this way together? Maybe Cassia felt like this too. It wasn't like anyone had hugged her recently, to be able to give her the feedback. People had bigger things to worry about, anyway. Finally, Dale and Andrea are finished. The group head off to go searching for Sophia, and Cassia stays behind with T-Dog and Dale.
The wounded, the old and the pregnant. What a trio.
It's all going just fine until T-Dog starts to become slightly delirious, his injury going untreated unsurprisingly starting to have side effects.
"Let's just go, Cassie. You, me and Dale. We can make it."
Dale, bless him, immediately stumbles forward and positions himself so that she's behind him a little, protecting her.
"What are you going on about?"
"There's a reason it's us who got left behind. Did you not notice?" T-Dog gestures to his own wound and then to Dale and then he seems to have some kind of an epiphany as he almost gasps and then gestures to himself in general, "It's because I'm black," he announces, as if he's only just discovered it himself. She shakes her head tragically, and Dale scoffs, throwing his hand up into the air into a gesture of barely outraged disbelief,
"Don't be ridiculous, it's because of the huge gaping wound on your arm, not the colour of your skin."
This seems to settle T-Dog down a bit because he shrugs and his eyes start to narrow a little more, in a dazed fashion, just as they had been before, the outrage ebbing away,
"Well... there's still a reason it's the three of us who got left behind. I'm injured, you're old and Cassie's pregnant," he stated, half indignantly, though he was too weak to do it with too much gusto. He went on like that for a little bit, trying to convince them they should all just jump in the RV and abandon the others and go, and it's all tolerable, and Dale's handling it fine until suddenly delirious T-Dog rounds on her and starts to try and use her unborn child as an incentive for her to leave with them,
"We could get your kid a chance. Your baby could be safe."
"Yes, because it's obvious, written right there in the sky, that as long as we leave and abandon our current group, we will be safe and sound," she replies, a little snarkily.
"It's the best thing for your baby-"
"You think the best thing for my baby is for it to grow up without ever knowing it's father? Who happens to be damn fine and handy with a crossbow? No, thank you, Theodore." She snapped back at him, sharply. T-Dog must have caught her tone, and the use of his full name, as delirious and out of it as he was, and promptly shut up. Dale gave a little speech about how badly T-Dog needed anti-biotics and then the two of them went off to rummage around some more in the cars, while T-Dog sat in the shade of the RV; watching the trees. Dale made sure to take the keys with him, and to lock the actual door into the interior of the RV, too. A wise idea. Their search turns out to be fruitless, and they are forced to put up with T-Dog's escapist ramblings for a few more hours until the others arrive back with more terrible news.
A woman rode up to them on a horse, told them Carl had been shot, and then took Lori with her back to the farm house she had come from.
... Right. Another two or three things off the list, then. Daryl even reveals Merle's extensive drug stash in a compartment on the motorbike, and T-Dog's slowly building madness is remedied.
The RV has long been fixed, and so they head off for The Greenes' farm house immediately, Daryl leading the way on his bike. Cassia drives the station wagon, and is more than glad when it's Andrea and Glenn who join her, and not T-Dog.
