Hey guys :) I wanna warn you ahead of time that this chapter might suck. I wrote it while I was super tired, haven't been sleeping too well. But I wanted to get another chapter up for you all. I'm hoping to make this a long fanfic, and I'm hoping I don't get writer's block. But if I do I hope you all will help with scenarios and stuff. Thanks again for liking this, it means a lot. :)
Sam and Gabriel spent weeks searching for their brothers with no luck. Sam had searched every possible location Dean could've gone, while Gabriel had several angels on the look out for Cas. Sam had even asked Crowley for information, which didn't offer any help. Gabriel was in heaven, checking in with any progress on finding Castiel. To Gabriel's luck, Cas was spotted sitting in a park in Ohio. Gabriel quickly made his way to Ohio, hoping his little brother would still be there. Gabriel bounced around several parks before finding Castiel sitting on a park bench watching an empty playground, holding something in his arms. As Gabriel got closer he realized it was a baby.
"Where the hell have you been?" Gabriel asked, sitting next to Castiel on the bench. "Do you have any idea how worried everyone has been? And who is the baby?"
"I am aware, you've had everyone looking for me." Castiel said, continuing to watch the empty playground. "I've been here at this playground thinking. As for the child, she is mine."
"Yeah?" Gabriel didn't take his eyes off his brother, making sure Cas didn't disappear again. He decided not to question Cas about the baby any further for now. "What have you been thinking about?"
Cas didn't answer straight away, instead he sat in silence watching a butterfly fly by him. He had always found his father's creations entertaining and was constantly amazed by them. Gabriel waited patiently for Castiel to give his answer.
"Why does love exist?" Cas asked, turning his gaze to Gabriel. "If love only leads to hurt and pain, why does it exist?"
Gabriel was caught by surprise and Castiel's sudden questioning about love. He could understand why Cas was questioning it, given what about with Dean. He could also tell Cas didn't know much about it and tried his best to think of way to explain it to his confused brother.
"Well, Cas, love isn't all bad." Gabriel wanted to help his little brother understand love better. "Sure there will be times where it's painful and you want to give it up, but there's good sides to love too. When you find someone you truly love, Cas, it'll feel like nothing else in the world matters to you. Nothing will make you want to give that up. It has its ups and downs but it's worth it to keep in the long run."
Castiel thought about what Gabriel had just told him. Surprisingly, he understood what Gabriel was telling him. He knew what true love had felt like, he was in love with Dean. He began wondering how the hunter was doing.
"Gabriel." Castiel returned his attention back to his brother. "How is Dean doing?" Castiel began to worry as he watched fear and worry wash over Gabriel's face. "Gabriel?"
"Dean's missing, Cas." Gabriel said, trying to break the news as easy as he could. "He went missing about five months after you had disappeared. We all thought you were dead, and Dean blamed himself. There's a possibility that he's dead."
It's been a year since Dean had gone missing. Gabriel and Sam were losing hope, but Castiel refused to give up on finding Dean. Castiel was standing outside Dean's room looking inside, which hasn't been touched since Dean's disappearance. When Cas felt like all hope was gone, he would stand outside Dean's room and remember all the times he had spent with the hunter. He would watch Dean's belongings collect dust as they stayed in the same exact places they were left, unmoved and untouched. Sam was making his way to the kitchen when he found Cas standing outside Dean's room.
"Hey, Cas." Sam said, standing next to the angel. He looked into Dean's room, not fully understanding why Cas loved to do watch the room so much. "You miss him, don't you?"
"Of coarse I do." Castiel said, removing his eyes from the room and turning his attention to Sam. "I should have never disappeared. Dean would still be here if I didn't vanish."
"You can't blame yourself." Sam placed his hand on Castiel's shoulder to offer even a little comfort. "All we can do is hope we'll find him."
Before Cas had the chance to respond Gabriel came running up holding a cell phone. Gabriel handed the phone to Sam. Sam was confused but took the phone anyways.
"Hello?...Dean?!" Sam was shocked to hear his brother's voice at the other end of the call. "Where are you?...Wait, Dean, don't hang-" The call was cut off before Sam could finish his sentence.
Sam was aware of Gabriel and Castiel's eyes watching him. Sam tried calling the number back a few times, but was sent to voicemail each time. Sam gave up on calling the number for the time being and turned his attention to the two anxious angels waiting for Sam to tell them something, anything about Dean.
"Where's Dean?" Cas asked, he was nervous and excited all at once. He wasn't sure how to feel exactly. "Sam, where's Dean?"
"Dean.." Sam paused, not sure if he could believe it himself. "Dean is in Purgatory."
Cas was no longer worried, he was scared. He knew how Purgatory was like and how it affected Dean. Why would Dean go back there? Did he really feel so guilty that he would send himself back there somehow? Cas was terrified at the simple thought of how Purgatory would affect Dean this time around. He had to help the hunter, but how? Luckily for him, they all knew the King of Hell. Cas, Gabriel, and Sam were all in the dungeon located in the bunker. Sam was summoning Crowley while Cas and Gabriel watched with interest. After Sam read the incantation they all waited for Crowley to show. It didn't take long for the demon to appear.
"To what do I owe this sudden meeting." Crowley said, scowling down at the devil's trap. He turned his attention to Sam, who stood in front of the devil's trap. "I thought we were past the traps, moose."
"We need your help." Sam said, ignoring Crowley's comments. "We need to get someone out of Purgatory."
"Who would you want to get out of Purgatory?" Crowley's attention was peaked. When no one answered, Crowley began to think of likely suspects. "Dean is in Purgatory?"
"Are you going to help us or not, Crowley?" Cas asked, stepping forward. He wasn't in the mood to deal with the King of Hell's jokes.
"Sure, I'll help you." Crowley said, smirking at the three men standing before him. "But I will not be doing it for free."
"What do you want then?" Sam asked, taking a step away from Crowley. "What's it going to cost us?"
"Well, first, you can get me out of this damn trap." Crowley motioned his hand down towards the trap. "We'll discuss the rest of the terms afterwards."
Dean was sitting next to a pond with Benny. He had lost track of how long he had been in Purgatory. He had found Benny almost immediately after entering the hell hole. Benny had questioned him about his decision, but eventually gave up on getting answers out of Dean. They were washing blood off their hands and clothes, when Benny decided to ask more questions.
"Do you plan on going back?" Benny asked, scrubbing a stubborn blood stain from his shirt. "You know this isn't a place for you, Dean."
"After what I've done..." Dean paused, looking out at the sun reflecting off the water. "I deserve to be here."
"What could you have possible done to deserve to be here?" Benny gave up on the stain on his shirt and started scrubbing the blood off his pants. "There isn't anything in the world you could've done to end up here."
"You have no idea." Dean gave a short response, not wanting to actually go into the whole situation. "If I think that I deserve to be here, it's got to be bad."
Before Benny had the chance to ask another question, a bright light appeared behind them, causing both men to jump to their feet and ready their weapons. They were prepared to fight anything that came their way, but to their surprise a demon emerged from the light.
"Are you Dean Winchester?" The demon asked, noticing the weapons and kept his distance.
"Yeah, I am." Dean lowered his weapons slightly, curious as to what the demon could want with him and why he would travel all the way to Purgatory to get to him. "Who's asking?"
"Just a simple lackey following the King's orders." The demon replied, feeling at ease as Dean lowered the weapon. "I'm here to take you back to Earth."
The demon's response truly surprised Dean. What would the King of Hell want with him?
"Why?" Dean asked, gripping his weapon tighter in his hand. "What does Crowley want with me?"
"Crowley doesn't want you." The demon watched Dean carefully, ready to run if the hunter decided to kill him. "He made a deal with your brother and two angels, Gabriel and Castiel."
Dean felt his heart drop. Cas was alive. He couldn't believe it. He wasn't sure if the demon was speaking the truth or if it was an excuse of some sort for whatever Crowley had planned for him. Something deep down inside of Dean told him that it wasn't a trick or trap, and that his angel was truly alive.
"Dean." Benny could see the sudden change to Dean's attitude and expressions. "Go on back home, Dean. That's where you deserve to be." Dean just nodded his head, knowing he couldn't argue knowing Castiel was alive. He hugged Benny and patted him on the back.
"It was good to see you again." Dean let go, smiling. "Take care of yourself."
Castiel had wanted to go along with Crowley's demon to retrieve Dean, but Gabriel and Sam wouldn't allow him; plus Cas had refused to stay home, so he had his daughter with him despite Gabriel's and Sam's protests. Castiel paced back and forth nervously at the spot they were to meet Crowley's demon, holding the now one year old little girl close to him. The demon had already gone into Purgatory three hours before Cas, Gabriel, and Sam got there. The demon has been gone for six hours now, Cas was counting every second. Eventually they saw a bright light coming towards them, causing them all to freeze in anticipation. Crowley's demon emerged from the light with Dean not too far behind him. Castiel wanted to run up to Dean and hold him close, but he couldn't while he was holding his daughter.
As Dean got closer he noticed Castiel was holding a child, which confused him. When did Cas have a child? Dean now stood in front of Sam, Gabriel, and Cas. Sam hugged his brother for a couple of minutes, welcoming him back. Gabriel welcomed Dean back and patted him on the shoulder, Dean just smiled and nodded his head at Gabriel. He stood in front of Castiel looking over the angel, happy to see the angel alive. Then Dean's attention turned to the child in Castiel's arms.
"Who's the kid?" Dean asked, looking from the child to Cas. Cas just smiled and kissed the child's forehead.
"Dean." Cas said, looking into Dean's eyes. "Meet your daughter, Bay Rose Winchester."
Dean's jaw dropped. He had a child. With Castiel. He began wondering if he was dreaming or if this was real. How was it possible for him to have a child with Castiel. Dean looked closely at the small child in the angel's arms. She had Castiel's dark, black hair and she resembled Cas greatly. Dean noticed that the girl had freckles and Dean's beautiful emerald green eyes. Dean wasn't sure how to react or how to feel. He had just learned that his angel was alive not even a few hours ago, and now he had learned that he had a daughter. A child with his angel, none the less. Cas began to worry that Dean wouldn't be happy at the sudden news and would take off. Dean watched worry wash of the angel's face and wanted to reassure Cas.
"Cas..." Dean paused, allowing a smile to spread across his face. "That's so great." Dean could see the worry and tension leave Cas as the angel smiled and sighed in relief. "But how is this possible?"
"We'll talk about it later." Cas said, smiling down at his daughter before meeting Dean's eyes again. "Would you like to hold her, Dean?"
"I would love to, Cas." Dean's smile grew bigger as Castiel carefully handed Dean their daughter.
Dean was finally back in his own bed, after he cleaned all the dust from his belongings. Today had been an exciting and eventful day for him, and he couldn't be happier. He felt awful for not being with Castiel during the pregnancy, he had been beating himself up about since he found out he was a father. Castiel came into the room, not bothering to knock, and sat next to Dean on the bed. Dean sat up, smiling, happy he had his angel back. Though he felt bad about what had caused the whole situation in the first place.
"Hey, Cas." Dean wanted to apologize for the longest time, and now he finally had the chance to do so. "I'm sorry, Cas, I'm so sorry. What happened with Lisa wasn't my fault. When you walked in is when she jumped on me, and I couldn't stop it in enough time. I've felt awful for it, and I tried praying to you to try to explain it but you never answered me. Then I heard Sam and Gabriel talking about the possibility of you being dead..." Dean's sentence trailed off as he fought off the tears welling up in his eyes.
"Stop blaming yourself, Dean." Cas held onto Dean's hands, hoping to comfort the hunter even just a little. "I over reacted that night and I should've let you explain. I didn't realize the impact of my absence would have on you, and I'm sorry for making you go through that. When I found out I was pregnant I got scared, I was scared to come back. I was scared of how you would react, so I stayed away and received help from Balthazar during the pregnancy. A few days after Bay was born I started going to an empty playground and allowed myself to be found. That's when I heard the news of you possibly being dead, so I came back and searched for you every single day."
Dean felt even guiltier after hearing Castiel tell him what he had been doing. Dean felt terrible for leaving Castiel to deal with the pregnancy alone, making him turn to another angel to help him with what Dean should've been there for. He felt even worse that Cas was terrified to come back and tell him about it. Dean hated the fact that Castiel would believe Dean would think ill of their child. Dean put all the blame on his on shoulders, hating himself the more he thought about Cas being alone to deal with the pregnancy. Cas could see the changing emotions crossing over Dean's face, and knew immediately Dean was blaming himself again.
"Cas, I'm so sorry." Dean said, feeling too guilty to look into Castiel's eyes. Instead he looked down at his hands which were intertwined with Cas's hands. "I should've been there for you and our daughter. I should've never disappeared. I should've tried harder to get you back. I should've been able to do something more."
"Dean." Cas lifted Dean's chin, forcing the hunter to meet his eyes. Castiel could see the guilt and the pain hidden away in Dean's eyes. "None of it was your fault, and if I could I would go back and change it all. I would've came back to you and tell you about it when I found out myself. But it's in the past now, don't blame yourself for the mistakes I made."
Castiel leaned in close to Dean, brushing his lips softly against the hunter's. Dean moved his hand behind Castiel's neck, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss. He had missed being this close to his angel, and Cas had missed it as well.
"Please, Cas." Dean was begging his angel, not caring if this was a 'chick-flick moment' or not. "Don't leave me again."
