Hey folks. I hope, if you're reading this story, that you enjoy it like I do. This chapter was both easy and difficult to write; that might make sense once you read it. Reviews are appreciated, and as always, I don't own HP.
Moonchild
Chapter 22
Seleneo
Seleneo spent the next several days in the hospital wing, even though he felt alright. Madame Pomfrey insisted that he stay, though, in case there was any lingering poison in his system. There was no use arguing with that woman, so he conceded. Luna continued to come visit him; these were more enjoyable now that he was conscious.
"You don't have to come here every day," he said one afternoon when Luna came to visit during a free period. "I'm a big boy."
"I know," she said dreamily, "but I want to. Ginny comes to visit Harry when he's in here, as he always is. It wouldn't be fair for me to not come to see you, would it?"
"Depends who you ask," Seleneo said. "I'm glad you do, though."
"So tell me," Luna said, "why have you been avoiding everyone?"
Seleneo was silent for a moment. "Tell you what," he finally said. "I should be out of here in a few days. Come with me to the clock face, and I'll tell you everything. Just be sure to wrap up. It's winter out there, you know."
"I chose this spot because it was the first place we ever spoke," said Seleneo once Luna arrived at the clock face. "I thought it might mean something."
Luna smiled as she sat down, more out of understanding than happiness. "Now tell me, Moon Boy, what's going on?"
"Alright," he said, and let out a puff of breath. "Here goes." He steeled himself for what he was about to say, then lowered his head and grinned in a joyless way. "Damn, I had all this rehearsed and it's so not about to go the way I'd planned."
"Just tell me," Luna said. "It's alright."
"Right." Seleneo prepared himself again. "Ok, well…Jesus…right, well you know how we're basically a thing. I mean, I know we've never really said anything about it, but…" His shoulders started to shake. "Anyhow…I don't want to think this, but I think you'd be better off with someone else."
"Why would you think that?"
"Well, like…" His legs were shaking, and chills ran up and down his spine. "I just…I've got nothing to offer."
"Don't say that," she pleaded. She reached out to touch him, but he withdrew into himself.
"It's true," he said, his voice muffled by his knees, into which his face was now buried. "You, you're…well, look at you! And you're so amazing. I've heard about all the stuff that happened the past few years. And you're smart, and you just…" He stopped for a moment, seized by dry sobs. Jesus Christ, this went downhill fast, he thought as he tried to gather himself enough to speak.
"What did you say?" Luna asked as she covered his hands with hers. "I can't hear you."
"I said 'I've got nothing to offer'," he repeated. "I'm just some hick that no sane person should want to be around."
"Well, they do call me Loony Lovegood," she said in an attempt to fight whatever it was that gripped him in this moment.
"I'm serious," he went on. "There's no reason why anyone should want to be around me. There's nothing about me worth having around. I thought maybe if I stayed away you'd forget about me and move on. That's also why I didn't go to Harry Potter's for Christmas; they needed a good Christmas after what happened last year. I would've ruined it, just like I ruin everything. And I especially didn't want to ruin it for you. That's the last thing I'd want. If you…" but whatever else he was about to say was lost to a horrible gargling noise in the back of his throat. The next several minutes were lost to him; he had been holding his eyes shut without realizing it, and the tears that had welled up had glued his eyelids together. Likewise, blood was now pounding in his ears, obscuring any sound that might have entered. All he could hear for the next few minutes after he finished talking was the blood in his ears and the ragged, gargling breaths that he drew. When he finally became aware of his surroundings again, he felt himself being cradled against Luna as best she could manage.
"Ssshh." She shushed him as she stroked his hair. "I don't know where these thoughts come from, but you are who you are, and that's good enough for me."
That was the last thing he heard before, despite where he was, he succumbed to sleep.
