AUTHOR'S NOTE- This is the chapter that my story gets its name from. It was so hard to write. Emison happening has to be perfect and not rushed or forced so I had to divide it into 2 chapters. This is the Alison side of it.
Thank you for your continued support. More than 60 reviews! Whoa! Love you guys so much. Every fav and follow is greatly appreciated.
I also owe a special thanks to 2 very dear friends. One who let me write her into my story – Thank you Ce. Another who helped me when I was stuck, wondering how I was going to make Emison meet again – Thanks Ronnie. Love you both.
EMILY WANTS ME
Alison stood outside the glass windows that she had found herself looking in on that night two years back. It was late in the evening, around seven and she stood transfixed by the charm of the place she had spent hours in and yet seen nothing of.
The walls were a soft ivory with deep mahogany wood paneling. Matching mahogany tables were lit by vintage birdcage lamps, which gave the room a cozy glow. The corner tables held arrangements of yellow tulips that added a splash of color. The café had an old worldly ambience but was not dated. Though welcoming and comfortable it still managed to maintain a definite aura of class and good taste.
A young couple walked out of the café deep in conversation. As the door opened and closed behind them the bells above the door jingled and Alison's heart soared. She was here. She was going to walk in and be face to face with the brunette again.
She took a deep breath, pushed the door open and walked in to the counter. Behind the counter was a young man in his late teens, who smiled at her pleasantly and inquired "Good evening. Would you like to try anything on display? Or you can order something off the menu and I'll get it to your table."
"A coffee would be great. A latte, low fat," Alison responded returning his smile. "Actually, I was looking for Emily. Would you be able to me tell me where I could find her?" She could feel her heart drumming against her chest and she was pretty certain that the young boy across the counter could here the racket it was creating.
"She was here a few minutes ago. She must be back in the kitchen. Let me get her for you." He marched back into the kitchen and returned moments later stating, "She'll be right out. Why don't you find a table and I'll get you your coffee in a minute?"
Alison looked towards the door leading to the kitchen. She couldn't imagine what it was going to be like when Emily walked out of that door. She sighed and walked towards a corner table that was cut off from the rest of the place by one of the mahogany paneled beams. The tablecloth was a pretty ivory crochet with exquisite detailed handwork and Alison couldn't believe she hadn't noticed any of this the last time. Had it all been this beautiful then too? The place did not look recently redone.
Her thoughts were interrupted by a distinctly Irish accent, "You were looking for me, cherub? I'm Emily." Alison looked up to find an extremely plump redhead, probably in her late forties, looking down at her with a friendly smile. She looked adorable in a red apron that matched her hair and dimples in her plump cheeks that were almost as deep as Alison's but Alison had never been more disappointed to see another person in her life as she was looking at this pleasant middle-aged woman. This wasn't Emily. Not 'her' Emily!
"I guess there has been a misunderstanding. I'm looking for a different Emily. This café belonged to her grandma. Tall, tan, dark hair, extremely beaut…"
"Of course. I'm so sorry dearie," she chuckled as she cut Alison off. "Yes, this café belongs to Emily but she doesn't come in here. Let me get the manager. She should be able to help ya." The woman shuffled off towards the kitchen again, nodding at two men in suits who had just walked in, who Alison assumed were regulars. Her coffee arrived and she sipped on it trying to calm her restlessness.
"Are you here to meet Emmy?" came a child's voice from behind the beam that hid her table. Alison raised her eyebrows and cocked her head to the side trying to find the owner of the voice. "Emmy? Yes," she answered tentatively, smiling at how the very cute nickname felt at home on her lips.
A second later she found herself looking into a pair of curious, doe shaped, baby blue eyes. "Are you her friend?" the girl asked.
"I guess you can say that," Alison responded, almost astounded at how much the little girl reminded her of herself. She had long blonde hair, the same shade as Alison's but straight. Her eyes were the same shade of blue, except that they had an innocent charm in them. She had delicate features, pale skin and rose tinted cheeks and could easily have been her a decade or so back.
The girl got up and walked over bringing the book that she had been reading with her. She sat down on the chair opposite Alison and leaned over whispering, "Are you Spencer?"
"Spencer? No!" Alison chuckled. "I'm definitely not Spencer. Why?"
"You are old and Emmy's friend. So I thought you were Spencer," the little girl responded casually.
"Old?" Alison grimaced. "Ouch!" she wasn't offended and laughed out instead. The girl didn't seem the slightest bit uncomfortable talking to Alison. Alison liked her.
"So why did you think I was Spencer?" Alison inquired.
"Because Spencer is the only one I haven't met," the girl answered with a shrug.
"Aah! I see," Alison responded smiling. "And who are you?"
"I'm Ce," the girl informed her, returning her smile. "Celine."
"Glad to meet you Celine,"
"No, no. Not Celine. That sounds old! Just Ce!" the child exclaimed, with her big eyes looking horrified at the prospect of being associated with anything 'old'.
Alison could barely contain her amusement. "So I'm old and the name Celine is old. What else is old?"
"This book is old. I don't know why we have to read such old books for assignments. Last year it was 'Pride and Prejudice' and that was old too. I read a lot just not old books that smell like Emmy's library. But Emmy says this is her favorite book, so it must be okay I guess." The little girl was slouched in her seat, her lack of enthusiasm for this 'old' book clearly written all over her face.
Alison looked on with her chin resting on her palm and a smile on her lips. She wanted children, she definitely did. She adored Malcolm and she was already impressed with this little fearless girl who spoke her mind.
"So what's the name of this smelly old book?" Alison asked the blonde child.
"Great Expectations, by Charles Dickens. Emmy says it's a great love story. But love stories are so 'old.'"
"Yes, I agree. Very old fashioned!" Alison chimed in.
Ce nodded and went on, "Why can't I read a mystery like Pretty Little Liars? Everyone reads it. Its about four girls whose best friend goes missing and they get messages from this unknown stranger who makes them do horrible things. But I'm not allowed to read it till I'm older. Right now I have to read about Pip loving Estella." Her adorable face looked crestfallen.
"Emmy says the book is special and taught her to love. She has all her favorite lines marked and she said she would explain everything I don't understand. But its so boring and …"
"… old!" Alison finished for her.
"Umhmm" the girl agreed with her.
Alison reached out and picked up the book, flipping through its pages. On the first page was an inscription in beautiful cursive:
'So you always love like you do, here is my copy of your favorite love story. - Love Grandma.'
Throughout the book she found lines marked in yellow, some with a note to their side. Some of the notes were in the same cursive writing as that on the first page and others in a different more immature hand, which Alison assumed was Emily's.
"'So,' said Estella, 'I must be taken as I have been made. The success is not mine, the failure is not mine, but the two together make me.'"
To the right of this highlighted text was a note in that second handwriting, 'Your darkness and hurt are a part of you, as much as your vulnerability and sweetness. I want it all'
Alison's finger ghosted over the note. That was how Emily loved! A few pages later was another highlighted line:
"I loved her against reason, against promise, against peace, against hope, against happiness, against all discouragement that could be."
Below this text was just one sentence, "I am the Pip to her Estella." Alison felt a pang of jealousy surge through her veins. Emily loved someone in the deepest way that one could be loved. Emily loved someone how Alison wanted to be loved… by Emily!
Alison wasn't thinking of what this realization meant. She had no name for her feelings but she didn't want to hide behind her confusion anymore. She didn't know if she was attracted to girls but she knew that she felt something real for Emily. She didn't know if Emily even liked girls but she wanted to be loved against reason, promise and all discouragement by her. She wanted Emily to love her because Alison had no doubt in her mind anymore, it didn't matter how long they had known each other for, she loved Emily.
She was debating if she should ask the child more about Emily. She couldn't think of any reason why it would be inappropriate to do so. "Ce, how do you know Emily?" she finally asked, unable to contain herself anymore.
"I live with her," the child answered, casually taking back the book that Alison held out to her.
"You live with her in her house?"
"Umhmm"
"How long have you known her?"
"One year and…" Celine stopped and counted on her fingers before going on. "… eight months."
"Do you like living with her?"
"Umhmm," came the reply again.
"Where are your parents?" Alison asked curious as to why this child lived with Emily. But before she could get an answer she was interrupted by a third blonde walking up to the table.
"What have I told you about disturbing the customers?" This was addressed to Celine who immediately got up and ran off towards the kitchen, but not before giving Alison a quick wave and smile. "I'm so sorry about that. I have spoken to her about this before but she just won't listen." The blonde finally looked at Alison and gasped.
Alison had an equally surprised expression on her face. The blonde who stood before her had a remarkable resemblance to her. Older with a slightly more angular face, darker blonde hair and thinner lips but still uncomfortably alike. To any third person they would look like sisters. Alison definitely being the more breath-taking one but still sisters.
"I never thought I'd see the day!" the blonde exclaimed as she almost fell into the chair that Celine had been sitting in. "Alison, isn't it?"
Alison finally composed herself enough to respond. "Yes. How did you know who I was?"
"Emily came upstairs telling me that someone was here looking for Emily. That sounded funny, didn't it?" she chuckled before she went on. "I came down and one look at you explained a whole lot of episodes that I could make no sense of before now. Of course you are Alison. I'm Cecile, Cece for short"
"I'm really confused about everything you just said," Alison told the older blonde honestly. "Anyway can you help me with an address for Emily?"
"How about I help you with the first ticket back to wherever it is you came from?" Cece snapped back. "What makes you think I am going to let you anywhere near her to destroy her again? The coffee is on the house," Cece informed Alison, standing up. "Once done, leave. Don't let me find you anywhere around my daughter or this café again."
Alison was taken aback. A minute back Cece had seemed casual, even friendly. The Cece that had left the table was sharp, curt and the glint in her eyes was almost malicious. Cece was protecting Emily, Alison could see that and thankful as she was that Emily had people who cared she couldn't help resent the jealousy that overcame her at the thought.
And then she remembered Cece's departing words 'around my daughter'. Celine was Cece's daughter. Hence, the resemblance that they all seemed to share, for some reason.
The child lived with Emily and Cece was her mother. So was Cece with Emily now? Cece didn't live with Emily before. Did Emily's feelings for Cece have anything to do with her resemblance to Alison? Did she really walk away from a chance with Emily that day two years back?
Alison could feel her heart crack in a thousand places and its pieces stab into her chest like shards of glass. She could hardly breathe. Of course Cece would not want Alison back in Emily's life. And maybe Alison had no right to seek out Emily again. But no matter how logical, the thought of walking away from Emily again was not something Alison wanted to entertain.
"Is your name Alison?"
Alison snapped out of her thoughts to look into Celine's questioning eyes again. "Yes. I don't think your mom would like you talking to me Ce." Alison responded.
"Emmy's grandma's name was Alison."
"I know," was all that Alison could mumble.
"I think Emmy misses her grandma a lot. She talks to her sometimes, you know. Emmy asks her why she left her. What had she done wrong?" Alison listened with a lump forming in her throat. Celine went on, "She also calls Mommy 'Alison' on some days, when she has been out with Hanna and drinks too much." The child's face was sad, her eyes missing their sparkle. "Mommy doesn't let me talk to Emmy on those days and sends me to my room but I have seen her. Mommy doesn't let Emmy come say goodnight to me on those days. I like Emmy kissing me goodnight."
"I would have liked that too," Alison replied. She mulled over everything the child had just said. Emily spoke of 'Alison' not 'Grandma'. Emily was speaking of her!
She felt her heart brim over; it felt so full that she felt she would choke. Emily remembered her! Emily called out to her! She wasn't the only one- Emily wanted her too!
"Emily wants me," she whispered to herself under her breath.
Alison wanted to hug the child who had unknowingly made her the happiest she had been in years but she knew Cece would not approve if she were to return. So instead she stood up to leave. "Ce, you really shouldn't be here. I should leave."
"Won't you be my friend? I won't tell Mommy," she promised. Alison couldn't help smiling and nodding at the child when she looked at those big blue eyes.
Alison walked out of the café and looked around. She couldn't really have thought that she would be able to come back and pick up right where she left off. She would have to work to make amends, fix what she had broken and get what her heart desired.
She really didn't know what she was to do now. She looked back through the windows of the café again. No, she wasn't going to leave Rosewood again. Good or bad this was home now because this was where her heart was. This was where Emily was.
"Life is never easy, is it?" she mumbled aloud before walking to the car she had rented and drove off.
Emily loves Alison! Alison loves Emily! Yay! In the next chapter Emily will meet her and say it to her in person. Leave me a review and tell me how you liked this one. Bye.
