FIRST PART OF A DOUBLE UPDATE!
Hey guys! This chapter is merely 430+ words long so I'll be uploading the next one right after. As I always do, I'd like to welcome AKgeekgirl, Kell-Bells34, meirin6, LivesofFandoms, Sharap'n, ValkyrieVeela, jkc1997, Zoey303 and hellcatz93 and thank you for reviewing and adding the story to your favorites! But a special shout out to 1-clisa-1, who followed, favorited, and left a mega nice review! Thank you so much! (also no, don't read the first version if you can help it)
Sorry it took me so long to update!
XVIII
Blame
Severus cared very little about the way he looked at the moment, wailing and crying in front of Albus Dumbledore like a wounded animal.
"I thought... you were going... to keep her... safe..." He managed to say between sobs.
"She and James put their faith in the wrong person." Dumbledore began with a grim expression. "Rather like you, Severus. Weren't you hoping that Lord Voldemort would spare her?" He didn't bother to answer. "Her boy survives." Severus moved his head at this revelation, dismissing him. "Her son lives. He has her eyes, precisely her eyes. You remember the shape and color of Lily Evans' eyes, I am sure?" He pressed in a soft voice and Severus felt the anger building inside him.
"DON'T!" He screamed furiously. How could I do this to her, I killed her. I killed her. He repeated in his mind. "Gone... dead..." He cried.
"Is this remorse, Severus?"
"I wish... I wish I were dead..." It should've been me instead of you. Innocent Lily. I killed you.
"And what use would that be to anyone?" Dumbledore said, not even a hint of pity on his voice. "If you loved Lily Evans, if you truly loved her, then your way forward is clear." Severus looked up, confused at his words.
"What—what do you mean?"
"You know how and why she died. Make sure it was not in vain. Help me protect Lily's son." Severus shook his head in disagreement.
"He does not need protection. The Dark Lord is gone—" But he knew that was a lie the moment it rolled off his tongue.
"The Dark Lord will return, and Harry Potter will be in terrible danger when he does." Dumbledore interrupted.
Severus kept quiet for a few minutes, trying to get a hold of himself. He took a deep breath and made his decision.
I owe it to her, I must pay this debt.
"Very well. Very well. But never—never tell, Dumbledore! This must be between us! Swear it! I cannot bear... especially Potter's son... I want your word!" He demanded; the simple thought of his mistake, his fault— the fact that Lily's blood was on his hands— to come out was enough to drive him to the edge of his self control.
"My word, Severus, that I shall never reveal the best of you?" The best of me? There are things not even you know, old man. And as usual, just the thought of her was enough to duplicate any pain he was feeling. "If you insist..."
