The four of them sit at Zelda's six-seater kitchen table, and centering was a not-so-bad smelling meal prepared all day by Zelda herself. Kolyn sat beside a empty chair, and Mallie was in a high chair beside Zelda. Link sat in between them. The posted guards came around to serve the dishes of food she made for dinner to everyone, leaving one to the empty chair for Dark Link. Zelda smiled, then turned to Mallie, pinching her cheeks. She had brown short hair and looked like Zelda.

"I know you're hungry, baby." Zelda spoke in her baby voice, "mommy will feed you." while Mallie laughed.

Link looked over at his son, "Kolyn, why are you sitting so far?" Link had a puzzled face expression, "you could sit beside me, and leave the end seat as far away from Zelda as possible." he laughed.

"I wanna sit with Casper!" he cheered, bouncing in his chair, "He's sooooooooo cool. Please, daddy, pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease!"

Zelda's head whipped in the direction to Kolyn, "Kolyn. Move. Over. Sit on my side." she told him.

"NO!" he yelled, "Casper is awesome."

Zelda's eyes bolded, then turned to Mallie to start feeding her, "Fine, but if you get another black eye, don't complain."

"By the way, where is Dark Link?" Link scoped the room, "I thought he came inside with me, but-" The toilet flushed.

Out busted Dark link, and along came a stench that overflowed the room. Zelda and Link's face scrunched up, Zelda covered her whole face. He strutted over to the table and sat down, putting his hands on his head and his feet on the table.

"Wooo!" she exhaled, "It feels like I just shit my whole life out." she laughed, wiping his hands on link's shirt.

Zelda's teeth clanked together with traumatic force as she growled. "DARK LINK!" she yelled, "Don't speak like that at the table, take your feet OFF, and shut the front door." she tried speaking in a nice tone. "You're late, so be quiet, and try not to say anything obnoxious, rude, or be annoying." she closed her eyes and stretched both her hands across, holding hands with Kolyn and Mallie. Everyone but Dark Link did the same.

"Whoa whoa, what is this?" he looked around, "Holding hands? The only things I hold are-"

"Grace, grace, grace!" Mallie hopped up smiling, dropping the soother out her mouth.

"Grab the hand next to you, we thank God for the food he gave us." Kolyn whispered to him.

Dark Link's eyes raised in confusion. "Thanking him? You are the high-o-mighty princess of Hyrule, obviously your rich ass is going to have food on the tab-"

"FORGET IT!" she yelled, "Forgive me God, we'll just eat." she breathed, trying to control herself. She gave Link looks…you know, that say 'do something about that abomination'? Link shrugged.

"Finally, that's the best decision you've made." Dark Link sighed while grabbing his fork.

Everyone else grabbed their forks and started to eat Zelda's dish. It looked like loafed meat, smelled like it, I guess that's it. Link took a bite out of it and made that same face when Dark Link came out of the bathroom. He forced a smile.

"It's…wonderful, Zelda." Link cringed, "you added something different, was it-"

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!" Dark link stood up in anger, "BITCH, ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL ME I DON'T NEED TO KNOW WHAT YOUR SHIT TASTES LIKE."

Zelda gasped, her mouth dropped open as she dropped her forks. "Ex….cuse me?!" she pardoned, "Now you're just a being stupid on purpose, they all love my cooking." she turned to Link and Kolyn, "Right?"

"Yeah, hunny…" Link smiled with 'meat loaf' stuck in his teeth, "This meat loaf is fantastic."

Zelda frowned, "It's fish…" she put both her hands on her forehead, "you were joking, right?"

"Look, I'm just speaking what they are scared to say, you should appreciate my realness!" he picked up the food, "but this…THIS?" he held it up, "You women stay in the kitchen but you can't cook? I pity you!" Dark link slams the food down back on the plate.

"yeah, mom…" Kolyn scratches his head, "After dinner dad takes me with him to get actual food to eat." he confesses.

Her mouth drops wider, "What? Link, is that true?!"

Link sinks down in his chair, not looking at her, looking most guilty.

"What the hell are you doing? Practicing your gag reflexes? Do you want me to stick my shadow dick-"

"I've just about HAD it with this, I won't sit here and allow you to insult my food in my home!" she gets up to leave the room.

Dark Link laughs, "Why are you making such a big scene by exiting, it's not even like you have an ass to look back at." he yelled to her. She stopped walking, and ran back at full speed with her fist launched back at him.

Link flies up from his seat to stop her from running over the table to punch him as Dark Link taunts her while her husband holds her back. "LET GO OF ME THIS INSTANT, LINK." she squirms in the air while locked in his position.

Link places her on the ground and grips her shoulders tightly while she faces him. He pulls her into the Kitchen. "I'm sorry he's like this, he's always been like this, Zelda…be strong for me, I appreciate you keeping him with us though you cannot stand him." Link rubs her arms gently, staring into her eyes.

"Link, I'm sorry, I'm trying." she starts tearing up from frustration, "I just don't want my children to get hurt, or learn from him. Link, don't allow it." she tells him. "I'm going upstairs, I need to sleep. Too much stress!"

"Yes, I will. See you soon." He kissed her on the lips, and held her tight. They whisper 'I love you' to each other and head opposite directions - Zelda heading upstairs, Link heading back into the dining room. He sees Dark Link throwing the 'meat fish' on the ceiling as it sticks. Mallie and Kolyn were throwing theirs too, the room was chaos.

"Dark Link, man." Link questions.

"H-Hold on, pal." he tells him, aiming with the food. He shoots it up at the ceiling and it all sticks. Kolyn jumps up and down with excitement, and Dark Link flings his arms back in victory, in result, hitting Kolyn off the chair he was jumping on, and his arm whacking him in the other eye. He fell face first to the ground.

"Bye-Bye, Kowin!" Mallie baby spoke.

"KOLYN!" Link yelled shaking him, "Buddy," he puts up three fingers, "How many fingers am I holding?! Kolyn?!"

Dark Link looked at Kolyn, then busted out laughing. "On the upside, he looks like Beetle Juice now…two black eyes, blonde-ish hair…? Ah, I crack my self up."