Author Note: Thank you to everyone for the amazing response to the last chapter, sorry again it took so long, and as you can see I'm a lot quicker with this one. I'm trying to take it slow, but also skip time, so it's an interesting combination. I also have lots of research to do so that I keep it accurate to the experience of visually impaired people. I may be a little slower with future chapters, but they should be coming.

For some reason it's not showing I updated my story Rookie (even though I left 24 hours between updates) but there was definitely an update yesterday.


The scent of the honeysuckle hit her before she reached the front door, her lips curved at the edges. She gripped tighter to Jane's arm and listened to everything around her. Next door someone was using pruning shears, she'd seen them out on several occasions recently, could recognise the sound of them slicing through bark. A car travelled past. She stepped forward, cautious, unsure of every step despite the familiar ground.

"Nearly there," Jane said, her fingers rested lightly around the base of Maura's spine.

"Where did the honeysuckle come from?"

"Ma and I planted it yesterday."

She swallowed, her eyes stung, teardrops strolled down her face. "Thank you."

"We wanted to make this as easy as possible for you."

She reached out her hand, seeing the blur of the approaching front door. When her hand collided with wood, she felt a surge of excitement, like she'd won a game. She trailed her fingers down.

"To the left," Jane said.

"I can do it," Maura said. She found the door handle and pushed down, but it wouldn't open. "The key."

"I can," Jane began, but Maura cut her off.

"I need to do this."

She handed her the key. Maura held it out, her other hand searching for the hole, where she carefully pushed the key inside and turned it in the lock. When it click, she grinned across to Jane.

"You look happy."

"I don't want to rely on anyone," Maura said, lowering her head. "It's going to be difficult not to, but I want to learn how to do things on my own. I hope you understand that."

"'Course." Jane rested her hand back down against her back and she stepped inside the house.

The floor changed, the feel of the concrete shifted. Her prior knowledge made it easier to understand the difference was the wooden flooring in her hallway. She clung to Jane's arm and pushed off her shoes until her bare feet touched the cool, wooden floor.

x

The first night in her own bed, Maura wrapped the bed sheets around her body, and got lost in the familiarity of her own sheets. She closed her eyes and listened to the sounds of the house, breathed in the scent of her bedroom. She gripped the soft covers. After a while, the distant sound of the television shut off, and she heard the spare bedroom door close. Silence followed. Her heart raced. She opened her eyes but the darkness didn't change, the shapes were barely visible with the lack of light. She let out a loud gasping as tears travelled down her face. The suffocating night gripped her windpipe, forcing the air out of her body. She moved her arm to one side, accidentally hitting something with her hand. The loud smash made her jump. The bedroom door opened, Jane's footsteps moved across the floor.

"Maura?"

She reached her arms out again, not caring what she hit, or what damage she could do. When her fingers touched Jane's skin, she grasped at her body, pulling her forward by fabric. She didn't know what she was touching, all that mattered was that Jane enveloped her.

"Don't leave me," she said, pushing her face against the side of her neck, losing herself in the comfort of her skin.

"I'm here," Jane said, lying her back down, her body inches from Maura's. She shifted herself a little closer and clung to her. It didn't take long for her heart rate to slow, and her whole body to relax. "Everything's gonna be fine."

She reached out and found Jane's shoulders, edging her fingers up across her chin, along her jawline and up to her cheeks. She leaned down and replaced her fingers with her lips. "Thank you for making it easier."

Jane moved closer, her breath warm against Maura's ear. She spoke softly, barely audible. "I'll always be here."

x

"I don't know if I can do this."

Maura sat up in bed, listening to the melodic sound of recorded piano music, when Jane's voice travelled up the stairs. She felt for the remote beside her, and found the button to turn it off.

"What other option is there?" Angela replied. "She needs us."

"It's too hard."

She listened harder, wondered if the conversation had continued and she just couldn't hear it. When Jane's voice grew louder again, her shoulders dropped.

"I can't watch her like this. She's helpless, Ma. She can't do anything on her own."

"She'll learn."

"But until then I have to watch her struggle with every single thing, and it breaks my heart."

"I know. It breaks mine too."

Maura brushed tears from her cheeks. It broke her own heart just as much. The last week had been the most challenging she'd ever faced. The majority of her life she'd been independent, reliant only on herself. To need somebody as much as she needed Jane, in that moment, was frightening.

"You don't understand," Jane said, her voice cracked.

She rested a hand across her heart and felt the thumping. She closed her eyes and slouched down against the bed, listening.

"Of course I do, we both care about her."

"I know." Silence. Maura wondered if the conversation was over, but then Jane spoke again. "This is different."

"I don't see how. We're all doing the best we can," Angela said.

"I don't know how to be there for her, knowing that it's my fault she's in this position."

"She doesn't blame you."

"She doesn't need to."

Rubbing her face, Maura wished she could rush down the stairs and pull her into her arms. She wanted nothing more than to remind Jane that she was not to blame for what happened, that she didn't hate her for it.

"I sit and watch her and she just stares, like she doesn't know what to do with herself. I don't remember the last time I looked her in the eye. I know she can't see me, not the way I can see her."

"Jane."

"I'm fine." The terseness of her voice hit Maura hard.

"You're not," Angela said. "It's okay to cry, it's about time you did."

"I can't fall apart, she needs me."

"She's not made of fine china, Jane, she's not going to break if you're honest with her."

"I'm not going to tell her. She's all that matters."

"You matter too."

"Not as much as she does."

Silence followed. The sound of running water, the fridge opened. She could hear footsteps on the staircase. Maura reached for the remote and turned the music back on.

x

"Get up!"

Maura rubbed her eyes and sat up, she opened her eyes but all she could see was darkness. She reached out, Jane's voice wasn't that far away. She searched the darkness until her fingers collided with Jane's skin, slightly softer skin.

"Was that your breast?" she asked, pulling her hand away.

Jane stayed silent for a moment. She took Maura's hands and moved them aside. "Yes."

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine." Jane clutched her hands. "We're going out."

"What time is it?"

"Midnight."

"Are you ill?" Maura could feel her eyebrows pull together, and wondered what it looked like with the injuries to her face.

Jane laughed, and Maura felt it in her heart. After the conversation she'd overheard, she didn't quite know how to talk to her, how to brace the subject. Hearing her happiness made her feel a little more relaxed.

"You've been inside for too long."

"Can't we wait for daylight?"

"Why?" Jane squeezed her hands. "It doesn't make a difference to you, besides, it's quieter at this time of night."

x

The sound of water reached her ears long before Jane even opened the car door. The gentle breeze of the night tickled her face. She climbed out of the car without assistance, and stood staring out across the darkness. The light above the car made it a little easier to see where they'd parked. She turned in a circle until she was sure she was facing the right way.

"Not quite," Jane said, resting her hands on her shoulder and spinning her around. She interlinked her fingers with Maura's. "Come on."

She followed her lead, guided by the movement of Jane's hand. They walked across concrete, then down some steps, until her shoes sunk against something malleable.

"I want to walk in the ocean," she said.

Jane ran her fingers across her shoulder. "We can do that."

She crouched down and attempted to unfasten the laces of her shoes, regretting putting them on the second they wouldn't loosen. Jane's hands covered her own and she helped her pull at a different piece and her shoes came off with ease. She tugged at her socks until she dipped her toes into the sand beneath her feet.

"Do you know how amazing this feels?" Maura asked.

"Wet?"

"It's cold," she said, digging her toes deeper until they hit wet sand. "Are you shoes off?

"No."

"Please take them off."

Jane muttered something under her breath, but she could hear the sound of the zips on her boots. She crouched down again and crawled across the sand until her fingers collided with Jane's ankles.

"Yes, those are my feet."

"Sand is amazing," she said, standing back up and stepping forward. "Is it safe to go this way?"

"Keep going," Jane said.

Maura closed her eyes, as though it made a difference, and held her arms out at her sides. She slowly walked, like a ballerina beginning a routine, her toes outstretched as they dipped into the slightly gritty feeling sand.

"Wait," Jane shouted. The sand shifted, speckles flew against her legs and she could sense Jane beside her. She rested her hands against Maura's shoulders and guided her forward.

"The ocean," Maura said, realising how much louder it had become. She listened to the waves break against the beach, the sand grew softer, wetter, and she moved from foot to foot to stop from sinking. "Where are you?"

"I'm here," Jane said, linking her arm. "I'll never be far away."

"I know."

They walked together, arm in arm, towards the edge of the water. A freezing cold wave broke and moved up the beach, touching the tips of Maura's toes. She edged forward, pulling Jane along beside her. She didn't care how cold it was, for the first time since losing her sight, she felt the life flow through her veins. Another wave broke and splashed across her legs, right on up to her thighs. She squealed and jumped backward. Losing her footing, she tumbled onto her backside, Jane's arm still hooked around hers. She felt her beside her, could hear her groan as the water gathered around them. Jane let go of her arm.

Maura's diaphragm contracted and her throat ached, laughter joined the sound of the waves, so much louder than she'd heard it for a long while. Her own voice, her own joy, so evident. She felt tears sting her eyes, a fresh pool of water moved around her.

"Where did you go?"

"I'm soaked," Jane said, sighing.

"So?"

"We'll get cold."

"Then we'll go home and get warm," Maura said, not moving from her spot on the ground. "Come and join me."

"I hate the beach."

"Just this once."

Her hands covered Maura's fingers, she turned them over and wrapped them around, holding onto them tightly. She felt her mouth curl up, creasing the corner of her eyes.

"It's been too long since I've seen you look so happy," Jane whispered.

Maura felt her way along her arm and on up to her shoulders, she skirted her fingers across Jane's chin. "I wish I could see it."

"It's beautiful," Jane said. "You're beautiful."

She lowered her head. "You keep saying that, but it's difficult to believe."

Jane cupped her cheek. She ran her fingers across her face. "It doesn't matter how many marks are on your face, or how much sight you lose, you'll never not be beautiful to me."

Something caught in the back of Maura's throat. She leaned forward. Her heart thumped loudly in her ears. She moved her fingertips across Jane's cheeks, along the edge of her nose and down to her lips. Ignoring the water still pooling around them, she leaning forward and brushed her lips against Jane's.

"Err, Maur," Jane said, pulling back, her fingers dropped to her sides. "That was my lips."

"I know."

She placed her hands on the floor and pushed herself up to her feet. She could feel Jane stand beside her. Her chest heaved with every breath, exhausted by the late night dip. She moved to walk away, no idea if she was headed for the ocean or the dry sand. Jane stopped her, her fingers around her face, before her lips smashed down against Maura's.