A/N: Hey everyone, so sorry for the usual lateness. Thanks to all who have read/reviewed/fav/followed! It means a lot and I appreciate it greatly :) Here's chapter 30!
Chapter 30: Haunted
Nearly a week had passed since Zirath and Arnbjorn's departure, and Astrid found herself staring into the small flame of the candle on the dining table. It was late and the nightmares had been relentless that night, so she'd simply given up attempting to slumber. Every night his piercing, green eyes haunted her dreams. His alchohol-laced breath filled her nostrils. His cruel words and brutality echoed through her psyche.
She found herself thinking of the farmhouse. It would be dead, silent, and lifeless at this hour, she mused. The thoughts of her former prison sent a forceful shudder through her spine as she realized just how many demons of the past dwelled on that cursed piece of land.
"What in Sithis' name are you doin' up so late, girl?" a rough, tired voice bellowed out, causing Astrid to nearly jump out of her seat.
She abruptly turned to see Festus seating himself at the far end of the table. She'd completely forgotten that he and Babette had returned from their contract earlier that day. "I...couldn't sleep." Astrid admitted, feeling secretly ashamed of what had actually been keeping her up.
"Then that makes two of us..." the old mage grumbled, popping the cork from a bottle of wine. He poured himself a drink, before gazing into the same flame.
"Why can't you sleep?" Astrid's brow furrowed.
"Eh..." Festus shrugged, fiddling with a nearby rusty fork. The expression on his face was distant, troubled, and completely unlike his usual self. "One could say no reason, but that'd be a damned lie. It'd be more truthful to say everything."
"What do you mean?" Astrid asked, intrigued by the somber quality of his voice.
"You've only begun this life, girl. If you haven't realized already - and I'm sure you have, since you're in this gods-forsaken hole in the ground - the life of an assassin is a tormented one at times." he mused, seeming to stare into another life - a life long past.
"I think that's basically life in general." Astrid remarked, remembering that the better part of her life had been nothing short of a nightmare.
Festus finally turned his head away from the flame to lock eyes with her. "For us it is, anyway. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy roasting people to death as well as the next assassin, but it wasn't my first priority to be what I currently am. Regret would be the word to come to mind. Of course, there are plenty of things I don't regret in this life. I don't regret leaving that putrid college. Those damned idiots were far too stupid for my liking. They claimed to love the Arcane, but how can a person truly love something if they don't embrace the whole thing? Sure, it's all sunshine and mountain flowers with them when it comes to protective wards and healing spells, but gods forbid they ever delve into studying the destructive incantations - and I mean really study them. Learn how to summon enough fire and lightning to liquify whole villages! If those little flower petals are interested in power, then let them embrace it all! The dark as well as the light! Yes, leaving those ignoramuses was, without a doubt, an excellent decision."
"Then what do you regret?" Astrid chimed in, attempting to steer the mage's tirade away from the college and back to the subject at hand.
"Well, for one, I could have really been something. I truly believe I was born with an exceptionally high aptitude for magic. Of course, I was also born with an incredibly low tolerance for morons. I know I'm a crabby asshole, and I'm that way for a reason. It's because I hate people. I hate how stupid they are. We live in a world where highly intelligent, albeit brutal, races like the great Dwemer once existed and descended into the realm of knowledge, creating ingenious ruins that numbskulls today could never even begin to replicate. Ever heard of the great Aetherian Forge?"
"No, I can't say that I have." Astrid slowly shook her head, wondering just where he was going with all this.
"Exactly!" Festus exclaimed, throwing up his hands in what seemed to be a bout of frustration. "Something along the passages of time went horribly wrong, and each era has gotten far more stupid than the last! We'll be lucky if our successors will be able to walk and breathe at the same time!"
Astrid simply stared into his angry, scowling eyes. "So...your point?" she asked, still wanting to understand just what all of his rambling was about.
"My point is that I regret living in a society where all the truly intelligent and capable are having to live cooped up underground like a bunch of damned hostages! Sure I may singe a face or two off every now and again, but at least I realize that I have that ability! And I embrace it fully, just as you do yourself! We each contain just as much darkness as light. People simply refuse to see such a thing about themselves - weak-minded they are! We need death as much as we do life itself! It's better to realize our whole selves than to run around all willy-nilly, waging useless wars and following redundant customs. People do not realize that following these politics and traditions is only an indirect way of doing what we assassins so boldy do ourselves. Common folk root for one side to slaughter the other! They yearn for certain beings to die, and they follow those who kill them. Why are we so different if we do the same with our own hands?" he continued, as Astrid began to see just what Festus was getting at. She slightly smirked, feeling relieved that she wasn't the only member to feel like an outcast in a world of blind followers believing to be living a just and moral life.
"I know what you mean." Astrid stated, in full agreement.
"That's not the only regret I have...It's not the one that keeps me up like this..." he sighed, drawing Astrid's attention once more.
"What is it?" she inquired, once more deeply curious.
"My damned wife...er...former wife..." he grumbled, stabbing the rusty fork into the old, wooden table.
"What about her?" Astrid continued her interrogation, secretly shocked by the fact that someone like Festus had even married at all. Someone so stubborn and contrary hardly seemed like the marrying type.
"I shouldn't have killed the little twit." he huffed rubbing his forehead as he sighed deeply.
"Why did you kill her?" Astrid asked, now dying to know what happened. Not only was it entertaining to hear her fellow siblings stories, but it was something that Astrid could usually relate to, and that was, in her opinion, a very rare and valuable gift.
Festus shrugged, with traces of pain wrinkling the corners of his eyes. "Eh, I had a temper. Always have. We married when I was a young man and she was a pretty young thing - like a flower or a little bird. Problem was, even during the short time we'd courted, she was so damned empty-headed and clingy. We never really had a proper honeymoon, and she'd always bitch and moan about it. She'd try little niceties in a vain attempt to make me happy, but failed miserably at each. I tolerated her inability to follow simple commands until one night..." he paused, inhaling deeply, before continuing.
"It was the night we were to leave to Solitude for our belated honeymoon, which was a complete joke in and of itself. Of course, the misses wouldn't shut up until we'd had a proper one. I'd spent a whole damned day arguing with the professors, came in spitting mad. I'd already torched two farmers on the way home. I knew I'd leave that wretched college soon and never look back. Then I came home to my ugly little shack, and there she was. She told me supper was on the table and that she'd draw me a nice bath before we departed. The food was bland - the same garbage she'd always prepared. The baths were never nice, though I stomached her inadequacy often. That was, until I laid in that wretched iron tub, staring a hole through her. She asked me if anything was wrong, like she always did. Only this time, instead of call her a thousand names and send her away, I said 'yes'. Then I preceded to jump out of the tub, push her in it, and douse her with a million lightning bolts..." he admitted, now downing his alcohol as if to numb the pain of his cruelty. Astrid simply stared, speechless.
"She was a gods-awful wife, but she didn't deserve that. Just lost my temper. Just fed up with all the morons, and at the time I thought I'd rid the world of one more. I should have just up and left. She'd probably have gotten herself a dumb husband and had a couple of mediocre children, but that was the life she wanted. I was never a common man. That life was not mine to live. Sometimes I still dream she's pouring my bath. Keeps me up at nights." he admitted, shrugging as if to shrug the unwanted memories away. "Now, here I am. I joined the Dark Brotherhood here, years ago when we were strong and fearsome. Now, even this isn't what it used to be."
Astrid raised a brow, internally wondering if Festus knew anything that Arnbjorn had metioned to her. "Does Zirath have anything to do with that?"
"I see you've been talking to Arnbjorn, eh?" he chuckled. "He seems to think our lack of contracts is something of Zirath's doing. However, I've been around a few years more than that scatter-brained pup, and I can tell you that everything in Skyrim is going downhill at a brisk pace. Just a sign of the worthless state this gods-forsaken province is in, if you ask me. A young person would be smart to move to a thriving land like Cyrodiil." he stated, matter-of-factly.
Astrid mused over his words for a moment, before asking, "Do you like Zirath?"
Festus paused a moment, before snorting and bursting into maniacal laughter. "Me? You're asking me if I like someone? I thought you learned quicker than that, girl!"
Astrid, not feeling amused by his crass sense of humor at the moment, simply crossed her arms and waited for his reply.
"Eh..." he began to wind down, apparently noting that Astrid was still waiting for a response. "He's an asshole, but we're all assholes here, so I guess he fits right in." he shrugged, before standing from his seat and stretching.
Suddenly, Astrid heard the rumbling of the Black Door in the distance.
"Well, whaddya know? Looks like our fearless leader and that mutt are back. Oh well, I'm going to bed." he grumbled, stiffly hobbling away.
Astrid stood from her chair, feeling puzzled. "Aren't you going to see if they have any contracts?"
Festus turned to her, scowling. "One thing you'll learn about me is that there are many moments where I just don't give a damn. This is one of those moments." he replied, his voice thick with frustration and bitterness, causing Astrid to scowl in return.
"Thanks for being so hospitable." Astrid spat, feeling a bit put off by his rude reply. She then turned to meet up with the other two assassins.
"Astrid."
She looked over her shoulder in hearing the mage call her name. "What?" she asked, still feeling displeased with his attitude.
"Don't take it personally. I really am just an asshole." he grinned, before disappearing into the shadows of another winding tunnel.
Astrid paused a moment, sighing and shaking her head, before stepping into the shadows herself.
