For the second time in only a short number of weeks, they had spent the evening talking. At first Nari asked only simple questions and only intermittently as she blow dried her hair; the sorts of questions to which a yes or a no would suffice if he did not feel like answering.
"Does V know?"
Retrospectively, she already had some idea. She remembered chatting to Yoosung on the phone one evening that Jumin was late from work, leaving her and V to dine alone together. Yoosung had called halfway through the meal, with news of Rika and her new address in Alaska.
"I've heard that the auroras are lovely at this time of year," V had said.
"Do you think you'll visit her?"
Of course, the moment she asked the question, she wished that she hadn't. He rested his fork and rose from the table to help himself to a glass of icewater.
"Have you ever...loved someone so completely, so ill advisedly...that you became someone else?"
"I'm sorry," she had said, "I-I shouldn't have."
But his smile was gentle as he returned to the table. For a moment she was not even afraid that she had offended him.
"Have you?" He asked, sitting back down in place.
"No."
"When I first met Rika, she was drowning," he said. "And I allowed myself to be bent and broken a piece at a time just to save her. I convinced myself that she was my burden because I was the only one who noticed. I told her so many lies just keep her head above the water. I said she was my only love. My first love. That our souls had arrived on this earth to be together and view the same sky."
"V…"
He shook his head.
"Now she's gone and I can say, without a shred of doubt in my mind, that it's for the better. By the time you came along, we were drowning each other."
As expected, Jumin's expression barely flickered at the question.
"Yes."
"Did Rika?"
"I don't think so."
No. No, of course she hadn't. She hadn't even considered Jumin as an option until declining the prospect of another woman. In a way, however, that singular fact was a good deal more revealing than it appeared to be on the surface. If Rika was jealous enough to feel uncomfortable of the idea of V showing another woman affection with her present, Nari knew there was no way that she would have seriously considered someone for whom V held a genuine affection.
Rika genuinely must have believed that V and Jumin were friends as opposed to something a good deal more intricate. In Jumin's place, she was sure she would have refused too; if they felt as deeply about one another as she was sure that they did, a threesome where two out of three could not be honest about their feelings would have ultimately been unfair to everyone.
She frowned then.
"Does your Father?"
To which he appeared visibly alarmed and she made a point not to mention it again.
Later, he opened the wine she had smuggled from his office on that first night and explained the answers to some questions she would not have thought to ask. How for the longest time he had laughed at the thought of himself craving the attentions of women, all while never feeling quite the same about men. By the age of nineteen, he considered himself entirely straight, all while mostly disinterested by women. He spent years explaining away his depth of feeling for V as a kind of brotherhood and any fascination he had for men as natural admiration. He wanted to be them and that was all.
"This changes nothing about how I feel for you," he said. "I just...I didn't question the dimensions of how I felt about men and women until I met Rika…and I didn't understand love-not really-until I met you."
"Even if it did," said Nari, "I wouldn't hate you."
They shared pancakes the next day, just as they had on their first morning together. Jumin took her hand in his and turned her engagement ring with the flat of his thumb, a habit he picked up almost immediately after placing the ring on her finger. She sometimes joked that if ever she were to lose it, he would know before she did and he had yet to disagree with her.
"I received word from V this morning," he said. "He'd like to invite us over for drinks when we're available."
Suddenly all she could think of was that it had been her idea to indulge in a threesome and yet now that the pieces were finally coming together, she was more than a little bit nervous. She felt like a virgin again, naked and blushing and ignorant of everything.
Oh, how she hoped that it would pass. The last thing she wanted was to make an ass of herself during what should have been one of her finest moments.
And so began the second longest car journey of her life
She had chosen her underwear carefully; her outfit down to the last detail. Every inch of her that evening was deliberate, from the sound her heels made on the tarmac to the shade of gloss she applied to her lips. She had even considered the way her hands would look intertwined with his and painted her nails accordingly.
"Mrs Han," said Jumin, breaking the silence that had enveloped them both. "You look exquisite tonight."
Of course, they weren't married and she was not yet Mrs Han, but the compliment brought a smirk to her face and she shifted in her seat, suddenly very conscious of how close his hands were to the inside of her thighs. It was an exquisite torture; like holding her breath and waiting for permission to exhale. As Jumin turned the engagement ring around on her finger in his usual manner, all that Nari could concentrate on was her sudden, insatiable need to have his hand up her skirt, paying the same attentions elsewhere.
Perhaps he knew. It must have been difficult to miss the way she kept crossing and recrossing her legs.
Once, she had called him from bed and held the phone close enough to her lips that he would hear her breathing. It was close to the party and she mostly intended it as a joke, but he had blown down the receiver by way of response and she swore, even though he was in a different room, she felt the heat in the pit of her stomach. And in that moment, she almost hated him, because no longer was it the simple lust that had dogged her every step since she arrived in his apartment. Now she needed him inside of her and knew that chances were slim.
She had almost wept when he appeared in the doorway and told her to lie still. She wanted nothing more than to wrap her legs around his middle and do unspeakable things with him, so when he climbed onto the bed and hovered over her, her mind went blank but for the growing ache inside of her. She wanted him, she wanted him, she wanted him inside her right there and then and having to lie still when he was close enough to touch was enough to drive her insane.
In the end, he had done nothing more than kiss her to the forehead.
"Good things come to girls who wait."
She was sure she would never forget the whimper she made; the small smirk that he gave her as he closed the door. It was hardly a stretch of the imagination to suggest that he remembered too; that he sensed her discomfort and meant to be cruel.
They rode the elevator in silence, neither making eye contact with the other.
"Nervous?" Said Jumin, as they reached the fourth floor.
"Nah," she said. "You?"
"A little," he said. "But then… you don't know how you look in that dress."
They arrived at V's floor shortly afterwards and Nari chuckled as she stepped outside.
"Yeah I do."
V had yet to make any further progress on his exhibit.
"2:15," he said, reaching for a bottle opener. "It's a curse."
"Does it have to be 2:15?" She asked, watching as he filled the closest glass. "It can't be 2.20 or 3?"
Jumin had chosen the wine specifically for the occasion. When she examined the bottle, he had told her that it was V's favourite, yet he was the last to take a sip.
"I wish it could," he said, swirling the glass before lifting it to his lips. "It would certainly make things a lot less complicated."
She was tempted to ask why, but took the hand he offered instead and followed him to the couch.
"I could never be an artist," said Jumin.
"I know."
"You didn't even wait for me to say why!"
"I don't have to," V smirked. "I've seen you paint."
Nari raised an eyebrow at that revelation.
"You used to paint, Jumin? You never told me that!"
"That," said V, as he placed his wineglass on the nearest coffee table, "is because he took lessons a very long time ago in an attempt to get closer to my sister-"
Jumin had taken a mouthful of wine, but he shook his head at that.
"Oh, no? Perhaps I'm remembering it wrong…"
"You are remembering it wrong. Your sister took up painting to get closer to me."
"Then why did you have lessons, then?"
"I have the funniest feeling it's because my father disapproved."
"Ah," V nodded. "Perhaps you do have the soul of an artist after all. But in any case," he ran his fingers along her back, smoothing them over spots that her dress had left uncovered, "it's a good story. You'll be telling it for years to come!"
Jumin sighed from his spot on the couch.
"I knew you were going to say that."
"Picture this," said V, stroking her exposed skin as anyone else might fine silks. "My parents used to have parties on the first Tuesday of every month and they would invite everyone they knew in the neighbourhood for wine and conversation."
"That sounds just like…"
"The RFA parties?" V laughed. "I ought to have known that you, of all people, would make the connection."
"They were always such ghastly things," said Jumin. "Ah, no offense-"
"None taken. Anyway, one particular month, Jumin's father came over to mine and asked how Jumin's painting classes were coming along and my Father was ecstatic," V could barely hold back his laughter. "He had him by the shoulders-Chief Han!-and he told him…"
V cleared his throat, presumably to do an impression of his own father.
"Your son is so terrible that I swear he's a genius."
Nari burst out laughing. Jumin groaned at the memory.
"But the best part was that Chief Han… you've met him, you know what he's like….no offense-"
"Some taken."
"He said that he had always advised his son against taking half measures."
She rested her own wine glass on the coffee table and leaned back against the couch to catch her breath. With her back no longer as easily accessible, V ran his fingers through her hair instead and almost immediately she began to wonder how she had given so little attention to his fingers before. They were exquisite, now she considered them; long and narrow and almost certainly skilful. She had a sudden urge to see him play the piano… and other far less innocent things.
"I can't believe you told my future wife that story," said Jumin. "I'm going to be hearing it for the rest of my life."
"Oh," said Nari, "but you must know all sorts of embarrassing stories about V, surely?"
Jumin considered it. So did V. For a moment he actually stopped touching her. Finally, Jumin smiled, put aside his wine and motioned for her to lean in closer.
"I've got one," he said. "Come here, I'll whisper it to you."
She leaned into him and he placed a hand on her cheek as if to whisper a secret in her ear. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw that V watched them closely and she'd be lying if she said she didn't enjoy it. She wondered what secret he meant to tell her. Perhaps he knew the sorts of things that V liked and felt inclined to tell her.
She gasped when Jumin whispered only 'sit still' and grazed his teeth across her earlobe. To hide the truth from V, however, she pretended to be shocked at some imaginary revelation.
"Good gracious," she said, the tip of Jumin's tongue teasing her outer ear. "Tell me more."
If V was concerned, he didn't show it.
"Yes, do," he said. "I'm all ears."
Nari felt herself flush a bright red. Did he know? How did he know?
"I… V, I can't believe what I'm hearing!"
Well that much was true, at least.
Jumin kissed her jawline and lowered the hand he had cupped against her cheek so that it rested on her thigh. Her toes curled and she turned to V.
"I'll tell you," she said, Jumin's warm hand on her thigh only drawing her attentions to the ache inside of her.
V leaned closer, following her come hither motion. She planned to whisper something deeply dirty in his ear, but once she realised he was so close that she could smell the wine on his breath she felt a good deal more bold. She had thought his fingers were wonderful, but his lips were perfect too and she wanted to kiss them. She slipped a finger under his chin and ran the flat of her thumb across his bottom lip so softly that it barely made contact, before leaning in and indulging herself completely.
She had wondered, on more than one occasion, what it might be like to kiss V. She had wondered about it long before she had expressed a serious interest in Jumin, back when she sat alone in Rika's apartment. She knew very little about the organisation, but she did know that V and Rika had been lovers and it was only natural that they kissed in her imagination.
Perhaps it was because she had mentally bestowed his kisses upon another woman that they seemed so inviting. His kisses were gentle and tasted so pleasantly of wine, but her heart raced as if she had stolen them and she found herself moaning, considering that duplicity had never felt so sweet.
"Do that again," he whispered in a low, authoritarian voice she would never have associated with him.
"You first," she said and he kissed her again, more forcefully this time.
She was almost composed until Jumin kissed her neck; those unrelenting kisses of his that left enormous bruises afterwards. He knew exactly which spots would make her squeal if he sucked them and the fact that he didn't was almost a crime. What's more, he used the hand that had been on her thigh to part her legs and teased it along the seam of her underwear; so close to where she actually wanted his fingers that she found herself reaching down to bridge the gap.
"I think," she said, pulling away from V's lips and gasping as he kissed her neck too. "I think that if we carry on like this… we won't make it to the bedroom."
Somehow she had not taken into consideration how complicated it would be getting from the couch to the bed. It took them a good twenty minutes of stumbling and tripping over one another's legs to reach the bedroom door; twenty minutes of abandoning clothes and crashing into furniture in a vain attempt to lock lips.
Her dress hit the ground exactly as she had planned it. A whisper of fabric against V's kitchen floor as she stepped right out of her high heels and enjoyed that sweet moment of standing before them in nothing but the underwear that she had so carefully picked out.
V's bedroom was cluttered where the rest of his apartment lay empty and only after his bed covers graced her skin did Nari realise she had never been permitted inside before. Not because V was especially stern and would refuse her if she asked, but because not once had it ever occurred to her to ask. Her heart fluttered as she sat up into a cross-legged position and examined all of the different cameras and tripods that lined the walls; the towers of books that surrounded his desk for lack of space on the shelves.
Jumin and V embraced one another in the doorway, halfway through helping one another out of their pants, rough hands tangled in soft hair. Retrospectively, she supposed she ought to have been jealous, for their chests rose and fell in a steady unison and when they finally broke free, it was to exchange gentle smiles. She knew that moment did not belong to her, though, and could not bring herself to mind.
They sat on the bed beside her, breathless from undressing. V already had bruises forming on his hip from a collision with one of the stools at the breakfast bar. The same one, now that she thought about it, that he had climbed onto to say they should talk.
"Made it," said Jumin, weakly bumping his fist in victory.
She rolled over onto her hands and knees and sat between the pair, taking the opportunity to admire the subtle variations in their bodies. When clothed, they had an almost identical silhouette, but now that they were down to their underwear it was a whole other story. V was slighter and paler than Jumin, without becoming sickly in appearance. His body had a dusting of freckles, where Jumin had only the occasional mole.
The first time they ever made love, Nari had kissed each one, which amused him greatly.
"What are you doing?" He had asked, stroking his fingers through her hair.
"Treasure map!" She replied, before kissing his chest. "I want to know where they lead."
"Fair enough, b-"
He broke off the moment her lips skimmed his belly button.
She realised she would not be able to do the same to V; his skin was too elaborate. In places it almost reminded her of a faded map of constellations.
"On a scale of one to ten," he said, as if reading her thoughts, "how annoyed would you guys be if I said the condoms were in the kitchen?"
Jumin groaned.
"I think the fact that I know you're joking only makes it worse."
But he got up anyway and left to pour a fresh glass of wine. V sat up and reached across to the set of drawers beside his bed. Nari leaned over, wanting to better admire him without worrying about neglecting her fiancé.
"Well hello there," he said, turning back towards the bed and finding her in a much closer proximity than she had been before. "What brings you here?"
"You," she pouted and he laughed as he slid the box of condoms across the bed.
"Me?"
He guided her onto his lap and kissed her softly, hands trailing from her knees to her waist and along her sides.
"Wait," he said, seconds after unclasping her bra.
"What is it?"
She wondered if she had acted too quickly; from her position in his lap, she could feel that he was gloriously hard and his body craved the attention, but his feelings on where they were in that moment were still something of a mystery.
"I…"
He blushed; a delicate peppering of pink across his cheeks. She was almost tempted to kiss it away, but she knew that she had never seen V blush before and the least she could do was listen.
"I...uh...I have only one request."
"Oh?"
"Tonight...and in general if you like," he said. "Please call me Jihyun."
A week or so after the RFA party, she had learned his real name, but it had always seemed wrong to refer to him by it in conversation. Clearly, she was not the only one to feel that way. Even Jumin, who had known him the longest, called him V without thinking. Still, Nari couldn't help but chuckle that of all of the requests he might have made, he chose that one.
"I think I can manage that, Jihyun ," she said.
"You think it sounds strange, don't you?"
"Little bit."
He laughed into the next kiss, tossing aside her bra before rolling on top of her in a smooth motion he had almost certainly done before. Her heart skipped a beat, even as she landed gently.
"I'll bear that in mind," he said as flesh hit flesh and she locked her legs around his middle.
His teeth scraped her bottom lip; her nails took in every contour of his back; she outright sank them in when he ground his hips into her, reaching up to take fistfuls of his hair without an ounce of finesse.
She'd been patient, she thought; she'd been good. It was only a layer of fabric that separated them and it would take only a matter of seconds to solve that particular problem.
They were breathless when she broke the kiss; both gasping into the next one. That was how Jumin found them mere moments later.
"Don't stop on my account," he said, setting the wine glasses down on V's desk. In the end, he had refilled all three.
"Come and join us, Jumin," she giggled as V clambered off her and shot her a conspiratorial glance.
"Room for one more," he said, motioning for Jumin to get on the bed as well.
V's wine glasses were all identical and the only one with any distinguishing markers was her own, which still held signs of her lipstick. Jumin picked up his own glass, however, as if it had a label on it or was painted a different colour to the others. He took a sip and regarded the scene before him: Nari flat on her back, bare breasted and red in the face from the previous excitement; neither she nor V in anything more than a pair of underwear.
Jumin took a sip of wine and savoured the taste almost as much as the aesthetic.
"Persuade me."
A challenge if ever there was one and blatantly intended as such. She glanced across at V, who winked before sitting up on his knees.
"Oh, Jumin," he said, slipping his hand into the condom box. "Don't be such a spoilsport."
"Come and play with us Jumin," said Nari, licking her lips and spreading her legs, stroking her wet fingertips along the insides of her thighs.
Ordinarily such a display would stop him in his tracks, but right then he almost looked bored, setting aside his glass and leaning against the desk.
"You'll have to do better than that," he said.
"Oh I intend to," said V, reaching up to kiss him so deeply that he had to cradle the fingers of one hand along his jaw. With his other hand, he reached across to her and passed her the condom he had pilfered from the box. Nari crawled towards Jumin, who held onto the desk to steady himself from V's kisses.
It was rather amusing to all three of them when Jumin broke the kiss and gasped from the mixed sensation of V's fingers along his jawline and Nari's lips along his stomach.
It brought her more joy than she could express the first time she learned exactly how sensitive he was there. Once, during that first stay at his apartment, she blew raspberries on his belly as a joke only to find he did not laugh at all. Instead he stared up at her, wide eyed and blushing. At first she worried she had done something wrong, especially when he speedily excused himself and did not answer her calls for at least half an hour.
She later learned the real reason. A reason that was almost painfully obvious to everyone in retrospect.
"Oh G-" He hissed, arching his back against the desk and gripping the frame for dear life as she trailed her tongue over his obliques.
"What was that?" V smiled. "I don't think I heard you."
Whether he registered the question or his present state first, she couldn't be sure. She did know that mere seconds later, he looked markedly more composed.
"Try harder," he said, in the even tone he saved for difficult meetings.
She sat up onto her knees too, guiding his lips onto hers. He melted into her touches; his body composing an entire symphony at odds with his words. Despite his appearance of cool control, he was barely holding himself together. Without the desk there, he would have fallen to the ground a long time ago.
She pecked him on the lips one last time before stroking her fingers along his chest and down his stomach to the seam of his underwear.
"May I?" she asked and he inhaled sharply before nodding.
As she looped her fingers around the seam and eased them off him, V moved further down the bed, trailing kisses along her neck and back. She froze when his lips caressed her ass, only to outright steal a glance when she felt his fingers on her hips.
He was positioned so perfectly to tear off that final, flimsy barrier between them; so close to where she needed him, and yet he did nothing but watch patiently, as if in anticipation. Nari smirked and turned back to Jumin, message read loud and clear.
By then, Jumin had abandoned his underwear and when she gripped his cock, he rolled his hips and thrust into her fingers. It was automatic and he squeezed his eyes shut as he did so, holding the desk with one hand and reaching down to tug at her hair with the other.
"Nari," he said, so softly that she could barely make out his words.
"What is it?" she asked as she let go of his dick and tore open the condom wrapper.
"Don't tease me anymore. I want...I..."
He tightened his grip on her hair as she slipped the condom into her mouth. It was some sort of fruit flavour; strawberry or grape if she had to guess and sweet against her tongue.
The first time they watched porn together, the actress had applied the condom with her mouth and it was all Jumin had talked about whenever they handled their own. He did not go so far as to say he wanted her to learn, but it was easy enough to figure out. She had spent a decent amount of time practicing on bananas without mentioning it to him and so the look on his face as she produced a perfect imitation was priceless.
V took that moment to slip off her underwear, so torturously slowly that she ground into him and received a gentle slap to the ass in response. He rolled her over onto her back to ease her underwear over her ankles and she watched, increasingly wet, as he hovered over her, stealing a kiss from her lips before heading south to bite her collar bone. She twisted slightly and raised herself up onto one arm to give herself a better angle of both men; trailing her tongue along Jumin's cock and winking up at him as she pumped with her free hand, all while turning every so often to watch V's descent.
She took him a little deeper as V parted her legs, going deeper yet as V layered tickling kisses along her thighs. In her mind's eye he already lapped at her and it was more than a little bit tempting to sit on his face.
The moment he ran his tongue over her clit, her mind fell empty of any coherent thought. She became incapable of anything other than moaning and shifting her hips back and forth in a vain attempt to direct his tongue. Anything to appease the desire deep inside of her that had grown so increasingly powerful, like a spring wound uncomfortably tight. Jumin seemed to be enjoying the show too; he kept slipping his cock from her lips deliberately and sliding his thumb across her lips instead.
In the end V didn't allow her to come. As a matter of fact, he built up her orgasm several times, only to change his pace and allow it to falter. She whimpered when he sat up and released his lips from her entirely.
"V-Jihyun," she said, her every word drenched with lust. "Please…"
A few minutes earlier, she might have had a more compelling argument than just 'please', but words were almost beyond her. She was about to come undone and could bring herself to care about nothing but the free fall. It was disconcerting how much she craved him; he who was not her lover. At the back of her mind, she wondered if she ought to have been more subtle in her want, but whenever she ran her tongue over Jumin's cock, he trembled and it was a relief to know he wasn't being subtle either.
"On your knees," said V and he didn't have to ask twice. She rolled over onto her front and watched as he reached for a fresh condom, Jumin gathering her hair and scrunching it tightly at the base of her skull. Ordinarily, it would have hurt, but she couldn't make out the boundaries anymore.
She shuddered with anticipation as he shed his underwear, suddenly losing her sense of balance. As if to torment her, he applied the condom so slowly that she was sure she might scream.
"Is this what you want?" he asked, hands secure against her hips.
"Uh huh," she moaned, turning her head, only to be swiftly yanked back by Jumin. She didn't see them share a glance, but knew that they must have, for Jumin gripped the desk and thrust forward into her mouth, right as V took his first thrust.
Those first few seconds were heaven. A slow, deep pace from V, who filled her perfectly, all while Jumin gripped hold of her hair and mimicked the pace. She made a point to run her tongue on the bottom of the shaft each time, relishing the incoherent sounds Jumin made to demonstrate his approval.
"Faster?" V suggested after she ground against him a third time.
"Please…" she whined.
"What do you think, Jumin?"
"You call this fast?"
"Ooh, so petty…"
He picked up the pace then; a pace so forceful that her toes curled and she gripped onto the bed for dear life, her knuckles white from the moments V caught that one particular bundle of nerves that she knew was going to leave her writhing in ecstasy. Every time he thrust her forward into Jumin, Jumin shook the desk behind him, leaving the bedroom a cacophony of moans, creaking bed springs and tinkling wine glasses.
She had prepared herself for every outcome and yet, even though it had been twisting and turning in the pit of her stomach, her first orgasm still took her by surprise. One moment it only threatened to overwhelm her and the next she was swimming in white noise. Jumin lifted her face so he was able to better watch it contort with pleasure, all while V cursed behind her, her walls clamping tightly around his dick and leaving them both gasping messes.
Retrospectively, she was quite jealous of Jumin. He had the best seat in the house.
"I've had the most amazing idea," said V, tentatively stroking his fingers along her waist and taking one, slow thrust that made her gasp. Only moments earlier, that pressure inside of her had gone in a blaze of glory, but one touch of his cock and she could feel it building again with a new kind of urgency.
"The last time you told me you had a brilliant idea, I had to explain a forty foot fish tank to my father," said Jumin, though he said it even as he moved from his spot by the desk and laid back across the bed.
"You liked that fish tank," laughed V. "You bought another for your apartment and it was almost exactly the same."
She crawled forward and took the chance to straddle Jumin, leaning forward to kiss V on the lips as she sank down onto Jumin's cock. V licked his lips afterwards with a bemused expression on his face.
"Cherry? Blueberry?"
"Strawberry, I think."
He licked his lips again.
"Ah, I think you're right."
"What are you two talking about?"
Jumin was always so much more impatient when he was close.
"We're trying to work out what flavour your condom is," said Nari as she smoothed her hands over his chest and sank deeper. "You don't approve?"
"You can't just…read the packaging…?"
"Where's your sense of adventure?" Nari pouted.
"I knew it was a bad idea to let you two spend more time together," he sighed, before rising into a sitting position. "Let's see…"
He leaned in for a deep kiss and thrust his hips at the same time, leaving Nari gasping at the rougher penetration.
"Hmmm," he said, breaking free and thoughtfully running his tongue over his lips. "You taste of berries. Not as refined as cherries or grapes, but berries all the same."
"You," he said, kissing V with just as much force, "taste like Nari."
"I'm glad we have your refined palate on the case, Jumin," said V, turning to rummage through his drawer. "It would have kept me up all night."
"I don't know if it's an...oh. You're joking."
"No. And I'm not sure which is worse."
V positioned himself behind Nari and kissed her to the back of the neck.
"Sweet thing, would you like me to join you?"
She didn't realise what he meant at first, but the realisation sank in with lurid blushes. She turned back towards Jumin, mostly in disbelief but also curiosity. She had always wanted it, but been too nervous to ask. The moment he nodded, she was sure she had fallen into a dream.
"I…" she turned to V, leaning into his frame. "Yes."
V smiled softly and buried his lips in her neck and shoulders as Jumin sucked at her bottom lip, his forehead inches from hers. She barely heard V's whispers to speak up if she became uncomfortable. She could think of nothing but how close she was to coming and didn't even register the coldness of the lube against her ass.
"We should probably have a safe word for something like this," said V and she smirked, for he said it as if he advised her to carry an umbrella on a cloudy day.
"I suppose we can use ours," she said, as Jumin kissed her jawline. "It's 'pause'."
The moment she said it, she knew how it would sound. When compared to other safe words she had seen and heard, 'pause' was incredibly mundane. In truth, they had created it for outside of the bedroom and out of respect for one another's boundaries after the RFA party. Jumin was uncomfortable on occasion when it came to talking about his feelings and sometimes Nari herself needed space. The word was the be-all and end all, even if they had never actually had to use it thus far.
"I like it," said V. "Use it if it becomes necessary. Use it and I'll stop right a-"
"Okay, Dad," she chuckled and he sighed into her, snaking one arm round to cup her breast.
"I know I told you to call me Jihyun, but I could get used to that."
"Don't even think about it," piped up Jumin.
"Well," she gasped as V eased his tip into her back entrance. "Now you definitely have to say it."
He eased his way in slowly, stroking his hands against Nari's waist and back. It was a strange sensation and she felt herself go quiet, taking in the sound of V whispering praise in her ear, that she was doing so well, that she was a good girl and he was almost there.
She did not need to be told, of course, when he was fully sheathed. The sensation by then was overwhelming not only for her, but also for Jumin, who groaned in delight and spat out curse words the likes of which she'd never heard from him before. Words that, up until that point, she would not have believed were in his vocabulary.
And that was to say nothing, of course, of how she felt. She supposed there were no words to properly describe how it felt to have each one of her sensitive spots hit at once at the same time. It was overwhelming and somewhat intimidating, for neither of them had moved and already it was almost an out of body experience.
They did move, of course, and she lost track of how many times she came as their pace got faster and deeper. She gripped onto both V and Jumin for dear life, digging her nails through the skin and receiving no complaints. They fumbled at her breasts, her hair and each other, growing increasingly clumsy the closer they came to climax.
They came together in the end; all three of them arching their backs and reaching out for something to hold, groaning and cursing as they rode out the euphoria.
It occurred to her, as she caught her breath safely cradled between them both, that all she had ever wanted was to be one of their secrets. She wanted to be one of the mysteries they shared and a story they told twenty years from then. And so perhaps that was why, as Jumin kissed her forehead and V leaned his head against her shoulder, her eyes blurred with tears.
The pleasure had been so intense; her emotions so overwhelming. She felt so much love for both of them and didn't quite know how else to process her complicated feelings.
It came as a comfort that there wasn't a single dry eye in the room that night.
After hours of kisses and whispers of love, leaving not a single inch of skin neglected or word left unsaid, the three of them laid down their heads for the evening.
She dozed off first, leaving V and Jumin to whisper to one another on her right and left. Every so often, she would wake a little and catch the end of a conversation about the elephant in the room.
"Where do you suppose we'll go from here?"
"I don't know. It... will be difficult for things to go back to the way they were."
"I'm not sure that I want them to."
"Oh?"
"For the longest time I've been muddled. V-Jihyun-you know this better than anyone. You knew me when I made the least sense."
"I think you were quite charming even then."
"Thank you for saying that, but...I have spent almost my entire life living a lie."
At that, Jumin laughed at his own words.
"I wonder if it is a lie if you believe it yourself," he said. "From the moment we met, I knew my path was planned out for me. I would work at my Father's company, I would enhance its reputation. I would be married before I turned thirty to a woman my Father approved of and-"
"And you would be six feet tall," said V. "I remember."
"I...how did you know?"
"It's how you introduced yourself when we first met."
"I…..In any case," Jumin sighed. "I've avoided this conversation for years, but it's not as if we have a choice in the matter anymore. Things are complicated now."
"They don't have to be."
"What do you mean by that?"
"Well, having the truth out on the table is hard, but being your friend and keeping this quiet is exhausting. People deserve to know when they're loved. I'm glad that you have Nari now. I imagine she tells you every day."
"If I had my way," said Jumin, "you, Nari and I would disappear to a private residence somewhere with Elizabeth 3rd. Just us...and our eight children."
"Eight?! Have you mentioned this to Nari? I imagine she has opinions."
"And all of our sons will be six feet tall and all of our daughters will have bright blue eyes…."
"...why am I the only one responsible for baby girls?"
"And I'll make pancakes every morning and no one will ever bother us!"
"That I like."
Even as they bounced names for currently nonexistent children off one another, she could never bring herself to complain. The combination of their warm bodies and hushed tones was incredibly comforting and, on the occasions that she fidgeted while half asleep, one or both of them would kiss her forehead and call her something sweet, like princess or kitten. She would be lying if she said she didn't enjoy the attention.
The bed was cold when she woke several hours later and she reached out into the darkness, hoping that someone would kiss her forehead or wrap their arms around her middle. No one did, however, and she sat up, scanning the room around her.
Perhaps they gone to refill the wine glasses?
No. No, the glasses remained on the desk where Jumin had left them.
On the opposite wall, the clock changed to 2:17
She could hear strange sounds coming from the kitchen. Muffled groaning and hushed voices. The more she thought about it, the more convinced she became that that was what had roused her from her slumber in the first place. Slowly, very slowly, she climbed out of bed. The majority of their clothes still lay strewn across the bedroom floor and Nari pulled on her underwear and someone's shirt before reaching for the door.
Perhaps it was nothing, she reasoned. Perhaps V and Jumin had gotten so caught up in their ambitious plotting that they had moved into the next room and one thing had led to another. Perhaps they would be in the cusp of something intimate when she walked in and apologise for waking her.
Deep down, though, she knew better. Jumin's voice was not laced with lust nor arousal, but concern.
When she opened the door, she almost immediately wished that she hadn't. Jumin and V sat on the couch in their underwear, V with his head in his hands and Jumin looking lost at sea. She was not close enough to see for certain, but she was sure that V was sobbing, even as Jumin stroked him on the shoulders and spoke softly.
"Please, you're not making any sense."
"I c-...I c-...I'm…"
Nari hovered in the doorway, wondering what to do. Wondering how this had happened and why. Had they pushed him too hard? Was it too soon? It had been such a long time since the events of Minteye, but given everything that had happened to him, maybe he had needed longer.
She debated announcing herself as she crossed the room to take a seat next to V, but decided against it for fear of adding further anxiety to an already emotionally charged situation. It seemed to be the right decision, for when she sat down, V barely reacted, but Jumin glanced across with an expression of helplessness. The more she thought about it, the one time she had cried- really cried- in front of Jumin, he had called V.
"Hey," she said, stroking her fingers through V's hair. "Hey, it's going to be okay."
"I'm s-sorry, N-Nari," he said, leaning his head onto her shoulder. "Y-you shouldn't have to see m-me like this."
"If you tell me about it, maybe I can help."
"N-n-no one can help me," he said. "It's...it's like I'm drowning."
"Jihyun," she said softly. "Did something happen to you at 2:15?"
He stiffened the moment she said it and she knew she was on the right track. Slowly, he nodded.
"Listen to me," she said. "Jumin and I are here now. We're here and it's going to be okay. We'll work through this together."
His hands were shaking, so she lifted them into hers.
"Remember the poem," she said. "Roses are red, violets are blue, mermaids can't drown, dear, and neither will you."
Several months later, "Before the Dawn" opened to rave reviews. Collectors flocked to see images of the city at night and the differing shades of the sunset, though ultimately, none of those became as infamous as the photograph at 2:15.
Violets are Blue sat on the cusp of the darkened exhibit and the brighter morning shots and showed only a disheveled bed; V's own disheveled bed, though barely anyone passing through the exhibit knew that. After the release of the exhibit to the public, she visited several times just to view that picture, knowing the sentiment and the context, while also having the pleasure of being one of the only people in the world that did.
Not to mention the fact that it was peaceful at the gallery. On that day in particular, it had been hours since any footsteps interrupted her contemplation.
"If you keep coming to visit like this, people are going to think you have a crush on the photographer," V said, unable to hide his happiness at seeing her.
"Ah," she said. "Just between us, I've heard he's an asshole."
Their boisterous laughter echoed against the walls and he linked his arm through hers as they walked through the rest of the exhibit.
"After everything that's happened, I can't believe we're finally here," said Nari. "I never thought we'd get the chance to see another one of your photos."
"Me neither," smiled V. "Another thing I owe to you, Mrs Han."
It was no longer a nickname. She really was married by then. She was also picking out white fur from his jumper; he was incapable of refusing Elizabeth's pleas for attention, even knowing that she only wanted to jump into his arms because he'd put on something black.
"Do you think you'll be home for dinner? I think Jumin said he'd finished the portfolio."
"Portfolio? Portfolio of what?"
"Houses."
"Of course," V planted a kiss to her forehead. "Then I'll make sure to be early."
She smiled as he spotted one of the gallery staff calling him over.
"Talk to you later?"
"Yeah!"
She reached into her bag for her phone and dialed Jumin's number, noting that he picked up on the third ring.
"Hello, princess. How has your day been?"
"Good. I've been out to the gallery."
" Again ? You're going to stroke V's ego if you keep doing that."
She knew he was joking, but he sounded sincere.
"I think that would be good for him," she said. "What is it they say? After the snows of winter thaw... Spring is around the corner?"
"What are you getting at, Nari?"
"Well…"
She cast a look behind her as she walked, taking in the wide smiles that he had not shared for well over a year after Rika; the bags under his eyes from insomnia that were finally starting to fade.
"...I think that spring is on its way."
She remembered a conversation they had had while packing for their honeymoon. Initially they had packed condoms without thinking, only to realise what they had done at the same time.
V came to live with them almost immediately after they stayed the night with him. Publicly, they explained that he was helping them with wedding planning and documenting their private life as a gift. In truth, he stayed in bed with them most nights and woke up at 2:15am every morning in a cold sweat. They never learned the reason for it, but one thing was clear. Their attentions could not be divided while he was healing and, as they packed and unpacked the same pack of condoms, the decision was made. They would think about babies once V was better in himself and showing signs of improvement, but not before.
"And when spring is here…?" said Jumin.
"Yes. I haven't changed my mind."
