…What. The Fuck.

My name is Isabella Swan. I was a normal American pre-teen.

Born to two loving parents, who eventually divorced, like 80% of Americans, I moved in with my rather flighty mother when it happened, two years ago. Now here I am, on the day of my 13th birthday… and I find myself staring at something that should be impossible.

CONGRATULATIONS! YOU ARE NOW 13 YEARS OLD!
YOU HAVE UNLOCKED THE GAME!

[TOUCH COMMANDS ACTIVATED]

WOULD YOU LIKE TO START THE GAME?
Y / N

I just stared at the blue glowing screen for a bit.

I slowly reached up and tapped the N on the screen.

ARE YOU SURE?
Y / N
TIP: IF YOU PLAY THE GAME, REALITY ITSELF WILL BE YOUR BITCH, AT THE MERCY OF YOUR WHIMS AND FORCED TO WORK AROUND YOUR ACTIONS AND CHOICES.

That one caught me… after all, who didn't want super powers? Even if they seemed a bit crude.

Then I remembered my mother and that I don't need things like this, and shouldn't fall sway to things like this. I reached and tapped the Y this time.

ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN?
Y / N
TIP: IF YOU DECIDE TO GIVE UP ON THIS OPPORTUNITY, NOT ONLY WILL SOME OTHER UNFORTUNATE SOUL GET IT INSTEAD OF YOU (PROBABLY SOME OUT OF LUCK KOREAN), YOUR MEMORY OF THIS EVENT WILL BE REMOVED AND YOU WILL GO ON WITH YOUR LIFE IN ITS ORIGINAL PREDETERMINED PATH.
TIP 2: YOUR ORIGINAL PREDETERMINED PATH, SHOULD YOU NOT TAKE THIS, INVOLVE YOU GROWING UP TO BEING RELATIVELY LACKING IN COMMON SENSE AND BEING A HOPELESS ROMANTIC THANKS TO YOUR MOTHER AND READING 'ROMEO & JULIET' ENOUGH TIMES TO WARRANT A PSYCHIATRIST BEING WORRIED.
TIP 3: THESE WEAKNESSES OF YOURS, WILL LEAD YOU TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CREEPY EGOTISTICAL CHAUVINISTIC STALKER WHO IS ACTUALLY A NIGH IMMORTAL WITH OVER 100 YEARS OF AGE, AND WHO FINDS YOU INTRIGUING DUE TO ONE OF YOUR NATURAL SKILLS AND AS SUCH, HUNTS YOU AS A TROPHY WIFE.
TIP 4: IT SHOULD ALSO BE NOTED THAT YOU WILL END UP PREGNANT WITH HIS CHILD BEFORE YOU END YOUR TEENAGE YEARS THANKS TO THAT PEDOPHILE. THE BIRTH WILL KILL YOU AL LA ALIEN XENOMORPH (THEY RIP THROUGH YOUR STOMACH, BREAKING YOUR RIBS IN THE PROCESS. HORRIBLY PAINFUL.) AND YOUR CHILD WILL END UP ROMANTICALLY INVOLVED WITH A DOG AFTERWARDS. LITERALLY.

My eyebrow twitched. I just know it did. Seriously, if it wanted me to play The Game that badly, it should have just greyed out the N or just started it without asking me… although it is nice to know a bit about my future, and what to look out for now.

With that in mind and that I would have to look up the Alien Xenomorph later for reference, I hit the N this time.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO START THE GAME?

Y / N

As I hit the Y this time, watching the entire world dissolve into 1s and 0s for a brief moment, I realized something.

I am Isabella Swan. I was a normal American pre-teen.

I am an abnormal American teen.