TITLE: Marked
AUTHOR: LOTSlove®
CHARACTERS: Richard / Kahlan / Cara / Zedd / Original Characters
RATING: PG-16 / R later
WARNINGS: Author Chooses Not to Use Warnings
TIMELINE: Anything up through S2
DISCLAIMER: I'm completely obsessed with the show Legend of the Seeker and all things Richard and Kahlan. I love to write about them even though they cancelled my show and now I'm fighting to get it back!
SUMMARY: Sequel to my fic Revenge, Richard finally has Kahlan safely back with him, but does he really?
Chapter 13
Entering the Spirit House, Tolla Nakunam followed them inside. "This is a good thing that they need to take time to discuss their decision," he informed them. "I wouldn't be alarmed about it. As soon as I hear anything, I will come to let you know."
"Thank you, Tolla Nakunam," Richard stated, glancing at his Confessor who was now wondering around the Spirit House like a prowling animal seeking release. He could practically feel her irritation rolling off of her. "We appreciate you speaking on our behalf for us."
"I don't know what good it did, but we can hope," he replied with a regretful shake of his head. "I will see that more food is brought to you. Does the Mother Confessor require Odo again? She does not appear well."
"No, I don't believe she does at the moment," the Seeker frowned, anxious to be alone with Kahlan.
"If she does, please let Temin or Hadi know," Tolla told him as turned to leave.
Richard nodded his head as the Tolla left, his focus solely on his Confessor. Something was terribly wrong with her and he had no clue what it was. The only thing he could think of was that it was related somehow to that unusual mark that had appeared on her arm the other day.
"We have to get out of here," she fumed from the other side of the room after the Tolla left. "We don't have time for this. You should've grabbed your sword when you had the chance. I can still confess them and get us out of here."
"What is this, Kahlan?" he asked, shaking his head in confusion as he stared at her. "What's going on with you?"
"What do you mean?" she paused to look at him, puzzled. "Nothing is wrong with me, Richard. We just need to leave so we can find Zedd and Cara and continue our quest."
"I'm sure Zedd and Cara are fine," he frowned. "You on the other hand are far from it. What was that in there with the Council of the Elders?"
Kahlan turned to fully face him, crossing her arms over her chest in unspoken defiance. "What are you talking about? I was just doing my duty."
"I'm talking about you losing your temper and threatening to confess the Council," he snapped, his frustration mounting. Everything felt so out of control right now, nothing making any sense to him – most of all Kahlan.
"You saw how disrespectful they were to me," she stated, her eyes still flashing with anger. "I couldn't let them get away with that. I am the Mother Confessor no matter where I go. I will be respected for the authority and the power that I possess."
"Kahlan, this isn't like you," he shook his head as he moved to stand before her. "You have never shown anything but compassion and consideration unless provoked. You've never exerted your authority over others unless it was absolutely necessary."
"I found it very necessary," she coldly replied. "Besides, we don't have time for this, Richard. We have to stop the Keeper and Darken Rahl…or would you prefer they be let loose from the Underworld so they can finish what they started with me?"
Kahlan's words struck him hard just as sure as if she had struck his face, igniting his fury in a way that she never had before. His eyes narrowed with the sudden anger that caused his heart to pound, his raptor gaze now leveled at the woman he loved. Her words had cut deep, the stinging pain of it nearly taking his breath away.
"How could you even say such a thing like that, Kahlan?" he asked with a deadly calm, his heart hammering.
"You don't know what I went through," she sneered.
"You're right; I don't! You refuse to even talk to me about what happened to you, remember?" he hissed. "You keep pushing me away like I don't even matter to you anymore…and then you're suddenly kissing me like you love me. I don't know what to think anymore."
"I don't want to talk to you about it," she bit out, visibly shivering despite herself with the memories that threatened to surface again.
Seeing her reaction, he took a step closer, doing his best to keep a grip on his steadily heating emotions. He wanted his Kahlan back and this was definitely not it. "Why are you acting like this?" he demanded to know.
"I just want out of here so we can find the Stone. I don't want anyone to suffer what I did," she yelled at him.
Crossing his arms against his chest in a mirror image of his Confessor, Richard felt his anger running in waves under his skin, anger for what had happened to her, fury for being so utterly helpless to fix it. "I understand that and I will do everything in my power to keep that from happening, but I'm not about to start a bloodbath with these people if we can talk our way out of it."
"Sometimes you have to fight," she reminded him, her blue eyes darkening like an approaching storm.
Richard studied her, his mind racing with what could possibly be wrong with her. She had never spoken to him like this before, had never tried to hurt him like this. She looked as though she could spit liquid flames, her chest rising and falling heavily with the emotions storming through her at that moment.
"What's wrong, Kahlan?" he asked, his voice suddenly calmer than what it had been. "This isn't you…this isn't the Kahlan I know and love. What's happening to you…to us?"
Kahlan stared at him for a long moment before slowly looking around at her surroundings as if seeing it all for the first time, seeing him for the first time. Her face was clouded with sudden confusion as she ran her hand across her forehead as if trying to wipe away the chaos in her mind.
"I…I don't know. I just thought…I was doing what was best," she softly replied, her gaze falling as uncertainty abruptly replaced her simmering anger. It felt like something had suddenly been lifted from her mind, allowing her to be in control of herself again. It left her feeling confused and bewildered.
His heart sank as he watched her bottom lip begin to tremble, his own anger vanishing as well. She honestly didn't realize what she had done, the things that she had said to him. He quickly reached out to her, swiftly pulling her into his arms and holding her close to him.
"It's alright," he whispered into her hair, worry thundering through his heart. "No harm done…but you may need to confess a couple of Aku to get us out of here if this doesn't go well."
His teasing attempt to lighten the mood did little to stop the tears from coming or allay her mounting fears. "I…I'm so sorry," she murmured, burying her face into the crook of his neck as she cried. "I don't know why I said those things to you."
Richard pressed his lips against her hair as he felt her tighten her hold on him, heartbroken by her anguish, by the things that were happening to her, things he couldn't begin to understand. "It's going to be alright, Kahlan" he said.
"I don't know what's wrong with me," she softly gasped. "It's like I'm losing control and I don't even know it sometimes."
"Something is going on that we don't understand yet, but I swear on my life I will not stop until we find out what it is."
Several long moments passed in silence as she savored the comfort and safety that his warm embrace always instilled within her. "I meant it when I said that you should leave me here, get away from me."
"Kahlan, I can't…I won't," he began to protest.
"Richard, I'm serious," she angrily replied, pulling free from his hold on her, the fire returning to her eyes once more.
"And so am I," he responded with equal stubborn anger as he watched her suddenly turn her back to him. "I'm not leaving you, Kahlan – not now, not ever."
"It's too dangerous for you to be near me," she heatedly insisted, her voice rising once more. "I feel like I'm losing myself and…and…Spirits, Richard! These headaches are so unbearable I feel my control over my magic slipping. I don't know if I'll be able to control it the next time it comes."
"I am not afraid of you or your magic, Kahlan," he protested. "There is nothing you could ever do, nothing you could say to me that would ever make me leave you or stop loving you."
"You say that now, but…"
Richard watched as her shoulders suddenly slumped with his words, her head lowering. He drew a deep breath to temper his anger and frustration that thrummed through his veins at that moment. He slowly made his way over to her, his hands slipping around her waist and pulling her back against his chest, needing to touch her, hold her.
"You can trust me with anything, Kahlan," he murmured, his eyes falling closed as he breathed in her captivating scent. "I just wish you would believe me."
"I do believe you," she whispered, momentarily relaxing in his arms despite herself. "I trust you more than anyone in this world."
"Then believe me when I say that I love you and I will find a way to help you, to stop whatever is happening to you," he reassured her. "I didn't risk everything to get you back just to lose you now."
"You're too stubborn for your own good, Seeker," she sadly told him, partially teasing, but mostly serious. He was going to get himself confessed if he stayed with her too much longer.
"But I finally met my match in you, Confessor," he teased in return.
Kahlan pulled herself from his arms, keeping her back to him. "You're bound and determined to be confessed to me, aren't you?"
Her voice was so sad, so full of regret that it pricked his soul. He felt her walls coming back up again, the Confessor's face slipping neatly into place again without even seeing it. "Kahlan, you confessed me the moment I saw you running through my woods, the moment I gazed into your impossibly blue eyes…and you never even had to use magic on me."
"I wish it was enough," she whispered, her voice cracking.
"I believe it is," he ventured down the path again, the same one that they had tread so many times already. "My love is enough, Kahlan."
"I love you, Richard," she softly replied. "But sometimes love just isn't enough…no matter how badly we want it to be."
Richard began to shake his head, her heartbreaking resignation feeling so final, so permanent. "Kahlan, I refuse to believe that…"
"I'm going to lie down for a little bit," she quickly interrupted, swallowing back her rising tears. "The headache is beginning to come back again."
Richard quickly seized her hand as she walked past him, pulling her to a stop beside him. Standing shoulder to shoulder, neither one looked at each other as they just stood stone still for a long moment that seemed to last an eternity.
His thumb softly caressed the back of her hand, trying to tell her in that simple touch everything that he had been so desperate to say to her, everything that had been consuming his heart.
"Our love is enough, Kahlan," he quietly said, the determined tone of his voice leaving little room for argument. "Someday, I will prove it to you."
"I hope you do," she whispered so soft that Richard wasn't quite certain that he had truly heard it.
He turned and watched her move to lay by the fire, exhaustion clinging to every fiber of her being. They needed to get out of here, to find Zedd and Cara soon. He couldn't stop the overwhelming fear that continually clawed at his very soul, telling him that he was on the verge of losing her all over again.
XXX
Cara winced as she pushed some branches out of her way, her shoulder throbbing painfully. She was doing her best to ignore its insistent pulsing that seemed to match every beat of her heart, but it was a constant reminder of her failure.
She had allowed her emotions to get in the way, allowed it to control her, grip her. She had always been able to temper and rule her feelings, keeping them buried deep inside and never allowing them to get in the way of her duties. This time, though, she had allowed her fears and frustrations, her anger to flow through her, melding and molding into the firm grip she'd had on her agiels.
She had tortured that poor man beyond reason, causing him to suffer unimaginable pain instead of delivering a quick and painless death like she had learned to do. He was just an innocent man, a baneling who had been given a second chance at life, manipulated into returning to this world by the Keeper in return for his service.
The Mord'Sith growled under her breath, cursing to herself. How had these emotions of hers gotten so close to the surface, lingering just beneath her skin to appear when she least expected them to?
Richard Rahl.
It was all his fault. If he had not encouraged her to get in touch with her emotions, opening her heart like that then she wouldn't be struggling to keep a tight hold on them like this. He had set her up for failure; she was sure of it.
He had to have known that she would never able to handle the onslaught of emotions that touching her humanity would bring about. Did he honestly think that she was capable of handling this? That she would be able to deal with these needless emotions that only got in the way of duty?
He had too much faith in her, misplaced trust that she would be able to cope with these useless feelings, know how to deal with emotions that she hadn't had to feel in so long. How could she truly protect her Lord Rahl and the Mother Confessor if she had an inner battle being waged in her soul?
Zedd watched the Mord'Sith as she stomped through the forest like an enraged gar. She was a storm of emotions raging beneath the surface, set to explode at any moment. He treaded carefully behind her, keeping an eye on her while trying to also to stay clear.
He knew that she needed a little time to sort through what had happened this morning with the banelings. He hadn't seen her lose control like that in months, but he knew it was entirely understandable. They had all been through an emotional whirlwind the last couple of weeks, one that didn't seem to be ending any time soon for any of them.
He shared her fears, her anger and resentment over the things that had happened, the interference by Demos Rahl. He knew that life for the Seeker and Mother Confessor was never easy, but when would peace ever become a part of their lives?
No one deserved it more than Richard and Kahlan, no one had a right to be happy and know love more than those two. He just hoped that this time alone together would help them get past their hurts and anger, to finally help each other heal.
And of course, their dear Cara. She deserved to know real love and happiness as well. He knew that her eyes had been opened to the beauty of love, the personification of it in Richard and Kahlan. They were a walking, talking, breathing reality of what true love can be between a man and a woman.
Zedd had no doubts in his mind about his grandson's love for his Confessor. His love was more than enough to do battle with Kahlan's deadly magic. The problem was that Richard had to figure it out himself. Telling him the secret to loving a Confessor would only plant seeds of doubt in the Seeker's mind that his love was truly strong enough.
Richard needed to give himself completely over to her – heart, soul, body, will, and mind, holding not one iota of himself back or he would be confessed to her forever.
He knew, though, his grandson's love would prove truer than any arrow, sharper than the Sword of Truth itself.
His attention was drawn back to his travelling companion and the obvious irritation that her shoulder wound was causing her though he knew that she'd be loath to admit it. "Cara, why don't we take a small break and I'll take a look at your shoulder?"
"We don't have time," she replied without pausing in her step. "Besides, I'm fine."
"Cara…"
The reprimanding tone of his voice caused her to stop. Drawing a deep breath, she finally turned to face him. "I appreciate your concern, Zedd, but I assure you that I have endured much worse than this," she calmly said.
Zedd could see the truth of her words in her eyes as well as the guilt that still lingered there. He stepped closer, his eyes not leaving hers as he placed a gentle hand on her injured shoulder. "My dear, don't punish yourself over what happened this morning," he told her. "You are just as human as the rest of us, I'm afraid."
"I let Richard down," she softly replied, her gaze falling.
"I highly doubt that," he shook his head in disagreement. "Besides, I'm not sure any of us are in a very good state of mind right now. Just because it happened primarily to Richard and Kahlan doesn't mean that it doesn't affect us as well, that it doesn't hurt us to watch how they have been made to suffer."
Cara finally raised her eyes to meet his understanding gaze. "I don't know if I can do it," she admitted. "Richard has put more faith in me than I deserve."
"I don't believe that for one moment," he smiled. "You know Richard is an excellent judge of character, as an inner sense about a person's nature that goes far beyond anything I've ever seen."
"It's downright annoying," she snorted, rolling her eyes as she crossed her arms against her chest.
"Come, let me take a look at your shoulder," he tried again with a chuckle. "We have to have you good as new so you can take out Demos and his soldiers when they attack again. You and I both know Richard will want revenge for what he did to Kahlan."
"I can hardly wait to get my hands on that imposter Demos Rahl," she spat out as she let Zedd take her pack from her.
"Now, that is one man I will not keep you from torturing for as long as you would like," he agreed.
Pulling her leather from her shoulder so the Wizard could heal her, Cara couldn't help the smirk that touched her lips. "I can hardly wait.
