The five stages of grief are:
1-Denial
2-Anger
3-Bargaining
4-Depression
5-Acceptance
Chapter 13 : The five stages of grief
Things slowly went back to normal. I returned home to dad with my tail tucked between my legs, telling dad stories of bathing in December with mom. Thankfully he didn't want to know anything that included Phil except if mom was happy with him so I kept my stories short. We went out to dinner that night and I was told that Damon had not returned from his visit to his brother. I nodded. If dad knew anything about me and Damon and our secret visit to Damon's brother he didn't say so.
School started and I struggled to keep up. I even took Angela's offer to cry on her shoulder as January came and went without any news from Damon. I kept contact with my new friends although things were strained. Elena told me that Damon was there and that's all I needed to know. I didn't want to know if he was with Katherine, Caroline, a new girl or alone. I simply didn't want to know. I had gone through the five stages of grief and was mostly concentrating on putting one leg in front of the other as the bigger picture was a little too much to handle. I hadn't mourned my relationship with Edward as I had gotten too interested at first and then involved with Damon that the pain was now double. I went on with my routine, daily exercising, weekly nights out with the girls, weekly dinners with Billy and Jake. The only difference was that I cuddled with one of Damon's shirts I got before Charlie locked the attic and that Jake was running around me. Mostly it was friendly but it started to get more couple like. I didn't even notice it until Angela pointed it out. That was when I sat him down and had a good talk with him. I told him he's a good buddy but that's all he'd ever be. He was angry and didn't talk to me for almost a month but then he came back, apologized and we were friends once again. I could tell he was having a secret then but it wasn't my business. I was already keeping too many secrets and while wishing I could tell Jake I knew (frankly I knew his land legends by heart by now so the possibility that Jake was a wolf is sky high), if he wanted me to know he'd tell me himself.
Charlie was happy that Jake and I went back to our childhood friendship and I admit I had missed it as well. As long as it was friendship only, I had too many heartbreaks in less than a year to last me a life time...
Damon POV
I don't know how long I sat there feeling sorry for myself, mourning my lost relationship. As the rain began to drop I decided I would go back to my old ways. Hunting and living for the day. Wasn't that what I planned on doing anyway? Help Bella fix herself and then leave her be? That thought would be my last on the matter. I consciously tried to move on. Everyday I was at the Grill meeting someone new, taking them to my bed, feed on warm, fresh blood. It was enough to pass the days but not nearly enough to think I moved on. I even formed a quick relationship with Bonnie, noop it sucked, and not in the good meaning. I knew Elena and Bella talked frequently but I never asked for information, I didn't want to know if she moved on with one of her friends at school, that boy from the rez, anyone new or is she was single. I was too busy mourning Katherine and my old life with her to even begin to think the possibility of Bella moving on. Or if I was honest with myself I simply refused to think she'd move on so fast after us. I shook my head and refused to think about it more as I went for dessert.
Denial
The first days after our breakup I simply denied it all and wished it was all a dream. That Bella and I were together and I hadn't foolishly kissed Katherine while Bella was inside the club.
Anger
Then I became angry, who did she think she was to pack up and leave as if I meant nothing? She didn't even tell me herself she left to her mother's.
Bargaining
When I killed Katherine deep down I wished that doing so Bella would understand how mush she means to me and she'd be at my house, in my bed waiting for me. Hearing Elena tell Stefan that Bella was gone shuttered this thought.
Depression
I slept with girls and drank from them on a daily basis. Never the same girl twice. I didn't want to think that they were all brunettes.
Acceptance
In the end as January came to an end I was ready to embark to a new chapter in my life. A chapter that did not include pretty brunettes from little rainy towns.
