Chapter 9: The Talk

Lee decided to head down to the Agency that afternoon to tell Billy the results of Amanda's test right away. The sooner, the better. Besides, he also had to tell Billy about the men he'd seen in the drug store, and he didn't want to have to explain to anyone else what he'd been doing there.

As he walked through the halls of the Agency toward Billy's office, Lee suddenly became aware that people were giving him funny looks. A few whispered to each other, and some looked away when he looked in their direction. It was a bad sign.

The bullpen was busy, as always, but a few people stopped what they were doing and watched him head over to Billy.

"Lee!" Francine said, coming out of Billy's office. "How is Amanda?"

"Amanda's just fine," Lee said. "She's still getting over the flu, but she's doing a lot better."

"She is?" Even Francine seemed a little strange, looking Lee up and down.

"Sure! Really, she's doing fine. Why is everyone so concerned?"

"Well, it was pretty alarming, the way she fainted in the Q-Bureau, and people saw you carry her to the infirmary. Billy said it was just the flu, but still . . ."

"Everything's fine, Francine. Amanda will be up and about again in another day or two."

"Well, that's good. People were wondering if it could be . . . well, something else. I didn't really think so, unless she fainted because she happened to see the stock market reports that morning." Francine laughed, but it seemed like a nervous laugh.

"Is Billy available? I need to talk to him about something."

"Sure, go on in," Francine said. "But, I think you'd better check your hands before you do."

"My hands?" Lee looked down. And saw the wedding ring. He'd forgotten to take it off.

He couldn't believe he'd been so careless! A slip like that in the field could get him killed! It must have been because he'd been so worried so about the test and the men he saw . . .

"Were you, uh, undercover this morning, Scarecrow?" Francine asked.

Her eyes told him that she wouldn't completely believe it if he said he was. Lee knew no one else was going to completely believe it either. Francine was just trying to give him a way out.

Forcing himself not to panic and reach for the ring, which would attract the attention of anyone who hadn't already happened to see it, Lee said, "Yes, I was. And, I have something important to report to Billy."

It actually wasn't that far from the truth.

"Okay," Francine said.

Ignoring the others in the room, Lee knocked (with his right hand, not his left) and entered Billy's office. He quickly slipped off the ring as soon as he entered the room, so he wouldn't forget again. Billy had seen the motion.

"Uh, oh," he said.

"Uh, oh," Lee confirmed. "I told Francine I'd been undercover this morning, but I don't know who's likely to believe it."

Billy rubbed the bridge of his nose. "I was afraid something like this might happen. Close the blinds. We need to talk."

Lee knew that the others in the bullpen would notice the closed blinds and comment on it, but he didn't care. They needed the privacy to talk things over. He could only hope that they might believe he was talking over some "secret mission" with Billy.

"What's the verdict?" Billy asked Lee. "Is Amanda pregnant?"

"No," Lee said. "She took a test, and she's not. She never really thought that she was."

Billy looked relieved. "Well, that will make things a little easier."

"How did you know? About us, I mean?" Lee asked.

Billy rolled his eyes. "For spies, you and Amanda were pretty transparent about your 'vacations.' I figured at the time that it was a romantic getaway for the two of you. Later, after you came back, I realized how differently you acted. You never used to care that much about working nights and even made it a point to work holidays. Then, suddenly, everything was different."

"So, you did some checking," Lee said, nodding.

Billy nodded his agreement. "I've known you long enough to read you. I've watched you and Amanda together. I thought the odds were good that the two of you would get together eventually. I just hadn't expected you to elope."

"What else could we do?" Lee said. "A married couple can't stay partners here, and neither of us was ready to leave. There was also Amanda's family to consider."

"Your family now," Billy pointed out. "Do they know?"

"Not yet," Lee said. "I'd spent so long trying to hide myself from them that we hadn't really built a relationship yet. We wanted a little time for them to get to know me, but we didn't want to put off starting our lives together. We were also concerned about getting the kids mixed up in Agency business."

Billy nodded thoughtfully. "I had some similar concerns when I married Jeanie. About the kids, I mean. Although I already knew that I was in line for a management position here. Things have been different for my family since I left the field. And, I just placed a family of defectors in Amanda's neighborhood." He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Yeah, there is that," Lee said with a weak smile.

"It really was the best place we could find for them," Billy said. "Having you and Amanda close was an added convenience. But, I promise, this is the last time."

"Amanda will be glad to hear that."

"How are things with the Petrescus?"

Lee told him all about the strange man at the airport and how he had seen him again at the drug store.

"Are you sure it's not just coincidence?" Billy asked. "I mean, buying sleeping pills isn't a crime, even if it does sound a little weird to be buying them for someone that young."

"Come on, Billy! First, the guy acts weird and runs away when Anton bumps into him, and then he's shopping for sleeping pills for a girl about Antonia's age? If he didn't have something to hide, why would he have run away from Anton in the first place?"

"You're starting to sound like Amanda with one of her hunches," Billy said. "It's not positive proof of anything, but I'll admit that it does sound suspicious. You've spoken to the security team about it?"

Lee nodded. "They're going to keep a constant watch on the Petrescu house until further notice. I have the feeling that Anton is holding out on us, but I can't get him to admit to knowing anything about this guy. He had a pretty strong reaction when he spotted him at the airport. But, if this person is a possible threat to his family, why would he try to protect him?"

"You really think he's protecting him? From us?"

"I can't see any other reason for him not to tell us who this guy is and what he knows about him. I'd guess that he could be former friend from Romania, but everything we have says that he didn't really leave any friends behind, at least none that would concern us, and this guy doesn't seem like he might be a friend."

"Things can change," Billy said. "A former friend can turn into a future enemy. It could be someone he once trusted who now has a reason for harming him and his family. Keep on this, Scarecrow. Try to talk to Anton alone, if possible, and see if you can draw him out. If you can convince him that this person may mean his family harm, you should be able to get him to talk."

"Okay," Lee said.

"As for your marriage to Amanda," Billy went on, "you know there are going to have to be some changes. You must have guessed that it wasn't going to be a secret forever."

Lee swallowed hard. "We never planned on it being a secret forever."

"As far as I'm concerned, it doesn't really matter. You two still are my best team. Even with everything you've been going through in private, you've never let it affect your work."

"But, Amanda and I won't be able to work together again after this mission, will we?" Lee hadn't even wanted to ask the question, but it had to be asked.

"I don't know yet," Billy said. "I've been thinking about this ever since I found out about your marriage. There are several possibilities, and I have a special project in mind, something that Dr. Smyth has been advocating for."

"Oh?" Lee wasn't sure that he liked the sound of it. As much as he wanted to remain with the Agency for awhile longer, the idea of getting involved with one of Dr. Smyth's pet projects was unsettling.

"It's more something that he'd like the Agency to focus on, and it occurs to me that you might actually be the best person to handle it, if I can get him to agree. It would elevate you to management level, which is where you should be to raise a family."

"A desk job," Lee said gloomily.

He'd always known it would come to that eventually. That's what happened to older agents. He'd never liked the sound of it any more than he'd ever liked the sound of getting old.

"It's not so bad," Billy said with a slight smile. "Take it from me. You're worried that it will be dull and you'll miss the challenges of being out in the field, but being a leader comes with challenges of its own. Maintaining control, maintaining discipline. Coming up with new ideas, new strategies. Helping newer people to hone their skills. You take a group of people with different personalities, different skills, you decide who is the best person to do what and set them a task to accomplish."

"And?" Lee asked.

"Sometimes they truly amaze you. It's true that you might miss being out in the field with them sometimes, but you also never know when you might have to step in and help them out. A good leader is one who knows how to be a team player, and he does whatever is in the best interests of his team. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised when you try it yourself."

"What is this new project?" Lee asked.

"I'd rather discuss it later. I don't know whether Amanda can be involved with the project with you, as your wife, although I'll strongly recommend it to Dr. Smyth. If he doesn't agree, I may have something else in mind for her so that she can stay with the Agency."

"We'd both appreciate that," Lee said.

"Lee." Billy got up from his desk and walked around it to sit in the chair next to Lee. "As far as your marriage to Amanda goes, I think we can work things out here at the Agency, one way or another, but I'd like to know what you intend to do about it outside of the Agency."

"You mean, are we going to tell Amanda's family?" Lee asked.

"Yes. Lee, a marriage is meant to be two people sharing their lives with each other. Right now, you and Amanda are mostly sharing work. Work isn't life. I know that part of the reason that you want to stay working together is so that you can continue to share in each other's life the way you have been, but what I'm trying to say is that the things that happen outside of work are the most important. Those are the things that will last for your entire life, beyond the job, beyond retirement. That's the life you have to build together."

"I know," Lee said quietly.

"And I don't think this secrecy is benefiting Amanda's family, either. They have a right to share in her life, and that means that you're going to have to share in theirs."

"I've been working on building a relationship with the boys," Lee said.

"I'm glad to hear it," Billy said. "But a real relationship is full time, not just on occasional weekends. From what Amanda says, that's basically the relationship they have with their father. They're not getting any younger, and as they grow up, they're going to need a man in their lives more."

"Amanda and I have been talking about it," Lee said. "Eventually, we're either going to have to admit to her family that we eloped, or we're going to have to get married all over again."

"What I'm trying to say," Billy said, "is that it would be better for 'eventually' to come pretty soon, for everyone's sake. The longer you try to keep this secret, the worse it's going to be when it all finally comes out, and it will come out. People here have been suspecting things about you two for some time. It wouldn't surprise me if Amanda's mother had some suspicions. And, most importantly, the next pregnancy test Amanda takes might turn out positive. She's still young enough."

"I know. We've discussed that, too."

"So, what are you going to do?"

Lee looked down at his hands, which were currently bare of the wedding ring he'd accidentally displayed to the Agency personnel.

"Do you think you can convince people here that I was wearing the ring because I was working undercover this morning?"

Billy was looking at him intently. "I can say it. I can't make them believe it."

"I'd appreciate it if you can try. After this mission is over . . . Amanda and I will either announce our marriage or our engagement. She and I will have to decide which. Then . . . we'll see what happens."

"I think that's wise," Billy said. "As I said, I'll do what I can for you career-wise."

"It might be less shocking to the boys if we get engaged and married a second time," Lee said reflectively. "People here at the Agency might suspect the truth, but I can't help that."

"Suspicions are a part of our profession," Billy said. "But, it might be a good idea if you spent as little time as possible around the Agency until the Petrescu matter is settled, and I've had a chance to talk things over with Dr. Smyth about his project."