Chapter 13: A Blonde in the Hand

A/N: Sorry for such a long delay between chapters! RL has been very, very demanding lately. I've also fallen behind on replying to reviews (again, abject apologies!). I really appreciate that fact that people are taking the time to read and review this, as well as recommend it (thanks pemilo, firebreather, and GoldenDarkness!).

Also, just a quick note (and possibly a spoiler, so beware!). One of my betas and a reviewer told me aboutDracula Night, a short story by Charlaine Harris set in the Sookie verse. Apparently all the vamps adore Dracula, especially Eric. He throws a b-day party for him every year in the hopes that Drac will show. We're talking Fanboy Eric here. Obviously, I couldn't resist incorporating this into my story. :)

And last but definitely not least, thanks to my betas – deiticlast, leathon, murg, SariLane, and satsuma.

Buffy surveyed the scene before her, fully aware of all the stares and the hushed silence. She hadn't made an entrance like this since – well, ever. Strangely enough, the total weirdness of it helped her relax a little. Weird she could handle.

She turned to Eric with an amused smile. "Do you always make this kind of impression? Because I've gotta tell you, it's kinda creepy."

Eric did not reply. He was still reeling from her revelation that she drank Dracula's blood – so much so that he didn't even bother to consider her utter lack of deference to him in front of the humans. Instead he simply gestured toward the table where Sookie and Bill were sitting.

It really wasn't necessary, though. Buffy had honed in on the lone vampire in the crowd of humans the second she walked into Merlotte's – Bill, presumably, which meant that the girl sitting next to him was Sookie.

Bill wasn't the only supernatural one in the room, though. Buffy's gaze flitted over to the bartender. There was something about him…

He knew she sensed it, too. He gave her a deer in the headlights look before he began busying himself behind the bar – a little too much. Because he didn't seem to be a threat, she turned her focus back to Bill and Sookie, quickly assessing them as she walked toward them.

She immediately gave Bill major points for making them come to Bon Temps. Sookie looked like she was recently on the wrong end of a troll hammer; definitely not travel ready.

Even through the cuts and bruises, however, it was obvious that Sookie was a pretty blonde about her age with curves to die for. And she was staring at Buffy as if she had four heads. Bill, too, looked uneasy, tightening his arm around Sookie protectively as they got closer.

Buffy didn't blame them; she wouldn't trust anyone that showed up with Eric, either. In fact, their reactions helped ease her own lingering doubts about coming here. Of course, at the end of the day, they were still under Eric's control.

Sookie gaped in disbelief as she watched the two blondes approach her and Bill. She heard what the girl said when she first walked in; the whole bar did, actually. It was just that everyone else wasn't around vampires enough to know how surprising the girl's comment really was – or Eric's lack of reaction to it. Sookie did, however. No one talked to the Sheriff of Area 5 that way, did they?

She knew Bill was shocked, too, if his death grip was any indication. This did not make her feel any better; not to mention the fact that she was starting to lose circulation in her arm.

Leaning into him for comfort just as much as to get feeling back, she whispered, "She's human… right?"

The question sounded ridiculous, even to Sookie's ears, and she was the one who asked it. Telling a vampire from a human should not be difficult. It was like telling whether it was night or day out. You just gave a good look out the window.

Yet here was this tiny, tan knockout with a mind as closed to Sookie as any vampire. Even a shape shifter like Sam gave her a little mental static. Besides, from what she had gathered from Bill, a vampire would never let a shifter or werewolf talk like that, like they were equals.

Dusk. This girl is dusk, Sookie thought to herself, inordinately pleased with her ability to continue her night and day analogy. She obviously needed a vacation.

Bill simply nodded in response to her question, too intent on studying Eric's companion to speak. He had seen the way she had immediately sized both him and Sam up. What truly alarmed him, however, was the stillness in which she did so. Clearly, she was no stranger to the supernatural, nor was she intimidated by it. She was human, but not like any human he had ever encountered before.

As soon as they reached the table, Eric immediately took control of the situation. "Sookie, Bill," he said. "This is Buffy."

"Hi," Buffy said, giving her best non-creepy smile while trying to think of anything that wasn't Slayer-related.

After all, freaking them out wouldn't exactly endear her to them, and she was going to have to trust them with the big Slayer secret. Besides, she just didn't do glower-y and mysterious.

Sookie just stared for a moment before her manners took over. "Hi," she finally greeted with a weak smile.

No handshake, though. She barely understood vampire etiquette; as if she had any idea what to do in thissituation. She looked at Bill, curious to see what he would do. To her disappointment, however, he just gave a little nod of acknowledgement.

"Well," Eric said pleasantly. "As much I enjoyed indulging you by meeting here, you know that this in not an appropriate place for us to… talk."

And it wasn't. All four of them knew it. Eric had only agreed to it for Buffy's benefit, correctly thinking that it would help convince her to come here.

"And where would a more proper setting be?" Bill asked slowly, though he could guess what the answer would be.

Sure enough, Eric immediately replied, "Sookie's house."

Buffy narrowed her eyes at the glee she felt rolling off of Eric. That vamp definitely enjoyed being a button pusher; and it worked. Bill frowned in disapproval.

Before he could protest, however, Sookie cut in.

"That's fine," she said firmly, ignoring the look Bill gave her.

She just wanted to get this over with as quickly as possible so that they could get Eric and the mysterious blonde out of their lives, causing as few problems as possible in the meantime. Besides, she could always just uninvite the Sheriff if she needed to.

"Fine," Bill replied curtly. "We will meet you there."

Buffy felt Eric's desire to goad Bill a little more. Tired of the puppet master making them dance, she decided to cut him off at the strings.

"Do you want me to drive again?" she asked with an innocent expression on her face.

Instead of giving any reaction to her question, Eric merely gave her a small, amused smile. The Slayer certainly kept things interesting. He strode toward the door without another word.

With a roll of her eyes, Buffy followed in suit.

Sookie made no movement to follow; she just watched them for a few seconds. The second the tiny blonde walk in, Sookie had been prepared to distrust her. She came with Eric, didn't she? And then there was the pesky fact that she couldn't read her. But the way she talked to Eric without any fear, almost as if she were taunting him… Sookie was tempted to give the girl a medal.

Sookie stared at the unconscious man currently tied to a dining room chair in the middle of her living room. She supposed things like this shouldn't surprise her anymore, but it did -from the minute she first spied the man in Eric's trunk to this moment now where they were just waiting for the guest of honor to awake.

It was pretty clear what Sookie's job was. No one had told her what she was supposed to find out, though. Come to think of it, no one was talking at all.

It almost seemed as if Eric was stepping back to let Buffy explain why they were there. This fascinated Sookie, especially since there seemed to be a constant power struggle going on between the two. For instance, when they first entered the room, Sookie and Bill took the love seat. Buffy sat in the furthest corner of the couch. Eric did not take the other corner, though; he sat right next to Buffy. By the expression on her face, Buffy was not happy with this, and the innocent look Eric gave her only made her scowl deepen.

Still, Sookie couldn't help but think that for once the big vampire might have bitten off more than he could chew. No matter what he did, Buffy held her own, even as the Viking vampire towered over her.

He definitely looked like he wanted to take a bite, though. In fact, Eric was looking at Buffy the way he looked at her when she and Bill went to Fangtasia that first time.

Eric wasn't one to leave a woman out in the cold, though. Sookie watched as the blonde vampire looked back and forth between her and Buffy, like a child trying to decide which shiny present to open first. How thoughtful.

What was that old adage? A blonde in the hand is worth two in the bush? A small giggle escaped past her lips. She reigned in her amusement, however, as she felt Bill and Eric's scrutinizing gaze fall on her like she was cracking up or something.

She harrumphed and leaned back into Bill. She was sitting in her living room with two vampires, one mysterious girl, and one unconscious man who was tied to Gran's dining room chair. All in all, she thought she was handling the situation pretty well.

Sookie's laugh startled Buffy out of her thoughts. She had been trying to think of a way to explain who she was without sounding like she was going to murder Bill in his sleep, while at the same time trying to prevent Sookie from finding out by reading her mind. It was like she was talking in code to herself.

Giving up for a moment, Buffy sat back, absently brushing her hair off her shoulder as she looked around the room. It definitely wasn't her style, but it had that nice, homey feel to it. After spending so much time on the streets of Shreveport or in vamp hangouts, it was a welcome change.

Her visual tour was cut short, however, as she felt Eric's eyes on her. It was kind of hard not to notice, actually; he was practically looming over her.

Buffy sucked in her cheeks in annoyance. Eric had been acting really weird ever since their little joy ride. Coupled with the fact that she was minutes away from finding out what was on Collins' mind, literally, she found herself a little short on patience.

"Okay, here's a tip. If you want to start with the trust building, stop staring at my neck," she said snarkily.

He ignored this and looked closely, fascinated by what he saw. "You've been bitten by a vampire. More than once," he stated matter-of-factly. He raised his hand toward her neck, just stopping short of tracing the scars with his fingers.

Buffy's hand instinctively flew up to her neck. "It's kind of an occupational hazard," she said coolly.

At this, Bill abruptly stood up. "Eric, I need to speak with you in private," he said, ignoring Sookie's obvious confusion. "Now."

Without waiting for a response, Bill headed for the front door. Eric silently rose from the couch and followed.

Buffy knew what they were going to talk about, but she didn't try to stop them or join them. In her mind, it just made things easier if Eric made with the explaining. Maybe Bill would surprise her, but on the whole Buffy didn't think any vamp would take a meet and greet with the Slayer very well.

Sookie looked at Bill and Eric's retreating back, wondering what the joke was and why everyone was in on it except for her.

Bill walked out onto Sookie's front lawn with grim determination. As soon as he thought that they were a suitable distance, he rounded on Eric, who was ambling toward him as if he didn't have a care in the world.

"Who is she?" Bill asked sternly.

Eric gave him a small smile. "Surely you know, Bill? Or at least you have an idea?" he prodded.

"I would assume that she was your whore, except for the obvious disdain she has for you," Bill said lightly.

He said this mostly to irk Eric, though it did seem like the most plausible explanation. Why else would she say that vampire bites were occupational hazards? And more importantly, why would Eric waste his time assisting a human like that? This made him uneasy, just as the human did, which is why he called Eric out here. Bill did not want to play any more games; he wanted answers – now.

Eric shook his head. "Try again," he said calmly. "Think… fairy tales."

If Bill had any color in his face, it would have drained away at this. He knew what Eric was referring to; perhaps deep down he even had his own suspicions before this. It certainly made sense, the way she acted, the way she spoke – but he still had a difficult time believing it.

"She's the Slayer," Bill said slowly. At Eric's smile, his eyes sparked with anger. "What kind of game are you playing here? I know that you enjoy taking risks no sane vampire would ever consider, but the Slayer? Have you completely lost your mind?"

Eric leveled a cool gaze at Bill, who immediately set his lips in a thin line and said nothing further. Regardless of his personal feelings, Eric was his Sheriff. Nevertheless, this was madness. Though the Slayer obviously was not the savage killer from the tales, she should just be left alone.

In the back of his mind, however, he knew why Eric would do such a thing. Although their kind had avoided the Slayer in the past, the world had changed since their existence became common knowledge. The Slayer could potentially come after them now or, inversely, those vampires who did not know of her existence before could try to kill her, to strike the head off the snake.

Yes, Bill could see how assisting the Slayer could be useful, an opportunity even. And of course Eric would take it. But it also had the potential to become disastrous. And what would happen if the Slayer did kill one of their kind, or vice-versa? He wanted no part in this.

"She has a blood bond with Dracula," Eric said thoughtfully. He didn't bother to mention his own blood bond with the Slayer. Why spoil the surprise?

Bill blinked in surprise. "That is… unusual. And intriguing," he admitted a little reluctantly. He could see why this would get Eric's curiosity – the fact that the Slayer was bonded to Dracula would get any vampire's attention.

"Isn't it, though?" Eric mused aloud, more to himself than anything else.

"You want her," Bill stated flatly.

Eric just looked at him expectantly, waiting for him to say something not quite so obvious.

Bill bit back a sigh of exasperation. "Even though not all of our kind will treat the Slayer as – cordially – as you have," he said pointedly.

"I've thought about that," Eric nodded seriously. "It could cause problems."

Bill had decidedly mixed feelings about this. While he felt Eric was personally endangering them all by playing this dangerous game, he was relieved that the Sheriff's focus might not be on Sookie anymore.

"So why risk it? I don't understand," he said carefully.

"You don't need to," Eric said with a slight smile. He turned to walk back into the house but stopped to look back. "Oh, and Bill? I wouldn't mention the 'whore' part. She tends to get… cranky."

With that, he strode into the house without another backward look.

After the two vampires left, an awkward silence filled the room. Buffy and Sookie looked at each other, neither one knowing what to say. Besides, they were both too busy to talk.

Buffy was trying to keep the telepath out of her thoughts, while Sookie was doing her darnedest to read them. When Sookie realized that she was on the verge of straining something, she gave up.

"Why can't I read your mind?" she finally blurted out.

Buffy nearly jumped for joy. There were just some things in her mind that no one should see. It made her wonder, though. "You can't?" she asked curiously. "At all?"

Sookie shook her head. "No, nothing," she admitted.

"It must be nice," Buffy said knowingly. "I was a telepath for a few days, and it totally sucked. Let me just say that the teenage male mind is a scary place."

"How were you a telepath just for a few days?" Sookie asked eagerly. She had never met another telepath before. "I can't ever remember not being one."

"It's a long story," Buffy said vaguely. "Anyway, I don't know how you deal with the noise all the time. It almost drove me crazy."

Sookie frowned. Buffy clearly didn't want to explain any more, but she was dying of curiosity. She decided to pick her battles.

"Is that why I can't read your mind? Because I would think it would be just the opposite," she surmised.

Buffy just shrugged. She had a few theories, none of which she wanted to share at that moment. Luckily, she didn't have to; the boys were back.

Eric walked in and sat down right next to her again. Bill came in a few seconds later and sat next to Sookie, putting a protective arm around her. Buffy noticed that he was now practically boring holes into her head, as if she might freak out at any moment and he needed to be prepared.

Seeing he didn't have her attention, Eric purposefully cleared his throat. "How hard did you hit him?" he asked mildly, nodding to Collins' unconscious form.

Buffy frowned at the insinuation. "Hey, I know my own strength," she protested. "If anything, it's your fault. Your blood made me go all wonky. I don't know what you're complaining about anyway. It made the trip to Bon Temps much easier, didn't it?"

Bill gave a small jerk of surprise at the mention of Eric's blood, but Sookie barely registered it. She hadn't listened to any of Eric and Buffy's exchange actually. Her focus was on the man in the chair. Seeing as he had the only mind she could read, she heard his thoughts the instant he started to swim back into consciousness – probably even before he knew himself that he was coming around.

It was all extremely foggy, but she could hear him struggle to remember where he was and why his head and jaw hurt. She heard him curse as he vaguely recognized Buffy and Eric's voices. He was British, and he was angry.

This is all that scrubber of a Slayer's fault.

She heard how he caught a word or two of conversation. He gave a mental start when he heard the words 'Bon Temps', however.

Bugger. The last thing I need is to come in contact with the Stackhouse telepath.

Sookie let out a surprised yelp. Bill, Eric, and Buffy all looked at her questioningly.

"What's a 'slayer'?" Sookie demanded. "And how does he know who I am?"