Okay, so this does have the much awaited for "confrontation" scene between Merle and Ethan in it and I'm pretty content with it - not my best work, but I'm okay with it. I've also been feeling that I'm writing Daryl a little bit differently than I have in earlier chapters and I don't exactly like the path he's going down, so hopefully this chapter will clear some things up as he backtracks more towards how I wrote his character in the earlier chapters. Also, this is the last kinda AU chapter - the next chapter will return to the show plot :)
HermioneandMarcus - thanks for the review :)
Maddy-MarieXO - hopefully this chapter clears some stuff up for you :)
HaloHunter89 - yeah, I do plan on having a little bit more confrontation with Rick but I don't exactly know when that's gonna be lol. And yeah, I do plan on Merle bringing some shit up with Daryl and if this chapter is any indications in how a certain little subplot is gonna go, then Merle probably not going to die anytime soon, because I need him. And yes, I certainly hope this chapter is delightful for you :)
- Nagiana
"What the fuck momma?"
"Ethan – watch your language! And lower your voice too!"
Ethan pursed his lips and looked around to make sure that no one was listening in on their conversation (no one was; they certainly had better things to do) before he turned a slightly angry look onto her. "Why do I have to lower my voice? He fucking slaps you and you let that slide under the rug?"
"You don't think he's sorry about it?" She asked him, her voice getting testy and her eyes flashing with anger as she met her son's gaze. "He almost broke down when he saw this bruise this morning! Hell, if wasn't holding Aayla, he probably would have dropped to his knees and begged his forgiveness from me!"
"Momma, that's what they all say -!"
"No it's not, Ethan – not with him! He's never done it before and there's a reason for that. You have . . . no idea how badly it is ingrained in him to never, ever lay his hands on a woman – for any reason! His father would have shit a dozen bricks if he was still alive and saw my cheek right now!"
"Then why did he do it, huh? If it's so deeply ingrained in him, then why did he do it?"
Tessa heaved a sigh and looked away. She didn't really know what to tell him. She knew vaguely why, but how could she tell her son that when his father was angry, pain turned him on to a minute degree? That moment back at the farm when she slapped him that one time before feeling his lips press against hers and blood flood her mouth, came rushing back and she realized that she couldn't tell Ethan none of that. He wouldn't want to hear details of his parent's sex life, for one, and for two, she didn't think he would understand. Him and Wren were nothing like that – there was an innocence and a lovingness to their relationship that Daryl and Tessa's would never have – the innocence, she meant. The lovingness was there in abundance, but the innocence . . . Daryl had never been innocent and so would his romantic relationships never be completely innocent too.
A baby's hungry cries split the air and Tessa immediately tensed. Although she knew for sure that it wasn't Danny or Aayla (they had already eaten) they were still a baby's cries, nonetheless, and she was still fine-tuned to react to them. "I'll be right back, baby, okay? I'm just going to go make sure that those aren't Danny or Aayla's." She told him and Ethan nodded as his mother left him and moved into the cellblock.
"Hey, what's going on?"
Ethan turned when he saw a curious looking Seth approaching him who immediately gestured towards the door from whence Tessa had disappeared through. "So, uh . . . what was that about?" He asked and Ethan shook his head.
"Just . . . family problems . . ." He replied, weakly, not knowing how else to describe them, and Seth grinned and laughed in reply.
"You seem to have been having those a lot lately. Don't you ever get a break?" He asked him with a slight laugh and Ethan nodded in wry agreement.
"Yeah, tell me about it; it's starting to get exhausting."
"First it was Tessa and the others getting kidnapped by your uncle, then it was Daryl leaving after he had gone to go rescue them with Rick and Michonne and then, he came back after a few days but with the crazy uncle in question who had kidnapped your mom and friends in the first place!" He shook his head. "Shit, man, I don't envy your life right now!"
"I take it I'm tha crazy uncle?"
They both jumped and spun around when they saw Merle leisurely approaching them, an amused smile on his face. "Now see, tha' ain' exactly right, although I ain' disputin' it. Every family needs tha' crazy uncle and I'll be glad to fill those shoes. I'm only a little crazy, tho'!"
"You're still crazy though." Seth immediately snapped back and Merle's face fell expressionless.
"I ain' tha only one crazy here, boy. In fact . . ." He gave a half-shrug as he held Seth's eyes. "I'd say I'm in damn good company, now wouldn' ya?" Seth's jaw tightened and Merle grinned and laughed. "Tha pup bares his teeth! Listen kid, when I tell ya tha' I'm out of ya league. I'd 'ave ya neck snapped before ya could even make a move against me! Hell, tha only man who could kick my ass is his grandfather and unfortunately, tha' old bastard's dead! His deddy likes ta think he can but Daryl's got a few things to learn before he's ready for tha' yet." He gave a snort then as his eyes quickly ran Seth up and down still standing before him. He rolled his eyes and gave a huff of irritation. "Fuck, kid, I ate cocky little spics like ya for breakfast in Juvie and Prison!" He nodded to the cellblock. "Now go run and check on tha' purty little sister of ya's – me and my nephew gotta talk, is tha' okay wit ya?"
Ethan's eyebrows immediately furrowed in confusion as Seth pursed his lips and spun around on his heels, where he disappeared into the cellblock. Merle moved to face Ethan as his arms crossed in front of his chest. "What do you want?"
"Nothin', I jus' . . . wanted ta see my nephew tha is apparently tha spittin' image of my brother!" He told him and Ethan sighed as his jaw tightened somewhat.
"Everyone says I do. Hell, I've grown up hearin' it since it since I was in kindergarten from momma." Merle shook his head.
"Gotta say, I don' really see tha resemblance, much . . ." He replied, a little thoughtfully, and Ethan rolled his eyes.
"What, in any of our scant interactions with each other, gave you the idea that I actually give a shit what you think about me or anyone in my family, for that matter?" He asked and Merle grinned.
"Ya 'ave his patience – tha's for damn sure. Tell me somethin' - ya a good shot, kid?"
"It's in my blood, ain' it? Pistol, rifle, shotgun – crossbow - you name it, I can shoot the button off a businessman with it." Merle continued to grin as he nodded and laughed, his hands moving to bury in the front pockets of his pants as he did so.
"Yah . . . yah, it's pretty deeply ingrained. And it figures ya Daryl's son and can shoot tha damn crossbow. I never got tha hang of it myself. Wha' 'bout ya trackin'?"
"Ain't that in my blood too? That and I was taught it really young on the reservation. Been doing it almost every day ever since this whole walker thing started, too," He told him before shaking his head. "What the Hell is this about?" Merle gave a casual shrug.
"Jus' . . . wantin' ta get ta know ma nephew, tha's all." He told him with a shrug, and Ethan nodded.
"Well, ya've done tha'. So, congratulations, now excuse me. I got ta go see if deddy or one of the others needs anything." Merle nodded as Ethan turned and headed towards the opened gateway leading to the cellblock.
"Yup, ya a Dixon, alright - not tha' I ever thought otherwise. Ya also half-blanket-ass but fuck, I can' begrudge my brother of whatever tail he managed ta get himself, now can I?"
Ethan's jaw hardened at those words. "Yup, that's what I've heard. You ain't exactly telling me anything new."
"Ya know, I've known ya momma forever – since almost right around tha time her and ya deddy first became somethin'?"
"Does this have a point? 'Cause yeah, I've known about that too!" Ethan asked him as he stopped and spun around on his heels to face his uncle. Merle gave a flippant shrug.
"Tha point is, I've known ya momma since her and Daryl were hormonal teenagers, Ethan . . . and I can tell ya tha' ya momma was a little bit of a whore -!"
In hindsight, it had probably not been a good decision for Ethan to lunge at him like he had, knowing who he was, but no one talked about Tessa that way in front of him - especially his asshole uncle. And in fact, he managed to land a pretty good sized blow across his uncle's jaw before alarmed shouts and the pounding of booted and sneakered feet against the concrete could be heard running towards them. Merle had also made a lunge for him, eyes enraged and curled fist held aloft, but Glenn and Rick got a good grip on him and managed to pull him away at the last second as Ethan felt Daryl wrap his strong arms around his son, where he pulled him, kicking and cursing, away from his brother.
Daryl couldn't help but smile, though, at the dark blue and purple bruise already forming on his brother's jaw. Seemed his son could punch after all and there was no longer any doubt in his mind that his son had balls, speaking he had lunged at Merle of all people!
"Ethan, what the Hell is going on?" Tessa demanded as she and the girls entered the common room, her eyes wide and shocked. Daryl shook his head as he dragged his son backwards towards the door leading to the outside world. Merle had calmed down enough for Glenn and Rick to hesitatingly let go of him but the glare of death he was pinning to the still spitting hellfire and brimstone Ethan, would have normally killed any lesser man. That, or at least made them shit their pants.
"Don' worry 'bout it, babydoll – I got him!" Daryl told her and Tessa nodded slowly as she watched him open the door to the outside world before letting him go. Ethan immediately threw himself out of his father's grip and moved away a few paces, still thrumming with anger. Daryl's jaw tensed as well in slight anger. "Now wha' in tha Hell was tha' 'bout, Ethan? Do ya know jus' how close ya came to dyin' back in there?"
"Fucker said somethin' 'bout momma!" He spat, his enraged eyes lingering on Daryl's for a minute before he resumed his pacing and his father rolled his eyes and nodded a little sardonically.
"Yeah, it's Merle, Ethan – tha's what he does – ya get used to it, believe it or not!"
"He called her a whore, deddy!" He told him and immediately, Daryl's eyes darkened.
"Oh, tha' asshole . . ." Ethan nodded in agreement. He stood there for a moment, his stance turning slightly awkward as he licked his lips.
"Why . . . why would he say that, deddy?"
Daryl glanced at him and held his gaze for a moment before heaving a sigh and looking down at the cement ground underneath their booted feet. His hands moved to his waist and he shook his head. "When we were younger . . . before ya were even thought of, somethin' happened between ya momma and Merle."
"Like what?" He asked and Daryl turned his eyes up to his. They held gazes for a moment and Daryl noticed the keen interest and the maturity that echoed in the blue depths – a maturity that a fourteen-year-old should not have had. Whether that was based on genetics or the shitty life that the world had ended up dealing him, he didn't know. And he knew that Tessa would beat the tar out of him if she knew what he was about to tell their son but something deep in his gut told him that Ethan would be able to handle the news. And besides . . . it wasn't like he was going to give him any of the nitty-gritty details.
"I was out huntin' one day and while I was gone, he ended up rapin' her. She couldn' live with me after tha' – seein' Merle 'round tha farm was jus' too much for her to handle on a daily basis and even with me there, so she left. She went to her parents back on the reservation tha' ya grew up on and . . ." He shrugged. "She figured out she was pregnant with ya a few weeks later and the rest is history. She told me tha truth of what happened months ago while we were still on tha farm – before she even knew she was pregnant with tha twins, in fact! We . . . we never told ya 'cause we didn' think ya'd ever need to know."
The look of shock flitted across Ethan's face then before being replaced with one of horror. He pointed towards the door and took a few steps closer to him. "And he's . . . he's in there with her? Deddy, you have to get him out of there – he shouldn't be around her -!"
"Ethan, son, she's fine!" He interrupted him soothingly with a hand on his chest when he reached him. "She's in there with God only knows how many people and ya can say whatever ya like 'bout Merle, but he ain' stupid! Even if he wanted to do somethin', he'd know better than to do somethin' around that many people. And Tessa knows better than to be alone with him, too." Ethan glared at him for a minute before shaking his head.
"Who the fuck are you?"
"What do ya mean?" Daryl asked, his eyebrows immediately furrowing in confusion and Ethan shook his head.
"You come back from being gone for two damn days and you seem . . . you're just not the same! My deddy – the deddy I had back at the quarry, back on the farm and when we first came here – he would have put a bolt through that jackass' head the second he saw him! And not-to-mention you slap momma yesterday too out of anger? What the fuck is wrong with you – where is the Daryl Dixon I called my deddy for the last year?" Daryl heaved a sigh as he ran his fingers through his dark brown hair.
"Look, buddy, I'm sorry, its jus' . . . I've been stressed and . . ." He trailed off and gazed at his son for a minute before slowly shaking his head. "You know what? I have nothin' I can tell ya that can possibly excuse the way I've been actin' lately. Yeah, I can blame it on the stress and yeah, I can blame it on the twins bein' young and still keepin' us up at night, but . . . they'd be excuses."
"What about him?" Ethan then asked, his voice growing harder as he nodded towards the door leading to the cellblock and Daryl immediately knew he was talking about Merle. "How can you stand there much longer and tolerate his bullshit? 'Cause I may be young, but I ain't stupid, deddy. I can see the hate in your eyes whenever you look at him – how much you want to slit his throat and watch him bleed out on the floor at your feet. Why haven't you done it yet?"
"He's family, Ethan." He replied, his voice low and Ethan heaved a sigh and rolled his eyes.
"That bastard in there – the bastard that almost throttled me - he ain't family, deddy! He's not my family and he shouldn't be yours either! Family doesn't do the shit he did to momma – family doesn't talk to you and to momma the way he does! Family doesn't abandon you and then come waltzing back in a year later acting like everything is fine and saying you should forgive him and every shitty thing he's ever done to you because you guys are 'blood' and that's what 'blood' does!" He shook his head, a disgusted look appearing on his face. "Shit, if that man wasn't such a damn hypocrite and respected blood like he says he does, then he wouldn't have stood there in that common room and called his own nephew a half-blanket ass!" Daryl violently flinched at his words and Ethan swallowed hard. "I don't know, maybe you were like him once, but you're not anymore, deddy, you're a good man now! And really, now that I stand here and think about it, I think you stopped being like him the day you fell in love with momma – when you fell in love with someone who wasn't your own race and you fathered a child with someone you knew would make them mixed! And for a lot of reasons, I look up to you above all others – I always have but lately, I-I can't and that kills me in ways that you have no idea how! Especially when I feel like you're too stupid to realize that you have me and momma and the twins now and that you don't need him – that you don't need him as part of your family anymore! Whether you know it or not and whether you want to face it or not, you . . . you've outgrown him."
Ethan trailed off then, taking in a deep breath as he did so and nodded. He looked down at the ground then, suddenly bashful, especially when he felt his father's eyes on him unwaveringly. "There . . . there I think I'm done now . . . I think I've said my piece."
"Ya sure . . .?" Daryl asked and Ethan nodded, swallowing hard.
"Y-Yeah . . . for now, anyway. I hear that . . . being outspoken is a Dixon trait, so . . . I suppose it's gonna come out every once in a while." He replied and Daryl chuckled as he pulled Ethan into a hug.
"I'm sorry, buddy – I really am! I didn' . . . ya right. I didn' know I was actin' any differently than I was and I know it has somethin' to do with Merle bein' back. Its . . . I'll try to change, okay? I mean, I've apparently done it before so . . . I assume I can go back, right?" His words ended in a question and Ethan nodded as they broke apart, Daryl's hand lingering on his shoulder as his son stepped away from him. He fought to hold back a grin then as he crossed his arms in front of his chest and looked away. "So, uh . . . what's goin' on between ya and Wren? Did I miss out on anythin' when I was gone?"
Blush immediately burned across Ethan's face then as his wide eyes flew up to his father. "W-what . . . how do you know?" He asked and Daryl let out a bark of a laugh.
"Oh come on son, I may be old and stressed, but I ain' blind! I see the looks ya send each other," He nodded and looked away. "I approve . . . I approve . . ."
"Is she better than Beth?" Ethan asked him with a grin and Daryl returned the grin as he nodded.
"Oh fuck yah! Ya had no chance in Hell of gettin' Hershel's approval for Beth but ya got mine for Wren, so ya know . . . ya don' have to worry 'bout that anymore." He told him with a wink and Ethan smiled a small smile as he stood by his father and crossed his arms in front of his chest as well before shaking his head.
"You are such a bad influence . . ." Ethan muttered and Daryl grinned and laughed as he wrapped an arm around his son's shoulders and pulled him into his side.
"Blame that on ya momma for her atrociously horrible taste in men."
"Hey, what are ya doin' up here?"
Tessa turned around and smile when she saw Daryl climb the stairs to the guard tower behind her, hands shoved down into the front pockets of his jeans. She gave a shrug and a smile. "No reason. Well, the twins are sleeping and I couldn't, so . . ." She gave another shrug. "Figured I mine-as-well come up here and do nothing except . . . look at the stars? Stare out into the great black abyss? I don't know, whatever you want to think . . ." She shot him a smile over her shoulder. "When did you get off watch?" Daryl heaved a sigh and shrugged as he moved over to stand behind her, where his arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer to him.
"Me and Ethan got off sometime around an hour ago. We got somethin' to eat and then he went to bed – poor kid is absolutely pooped. I couldn' sleep either." He planted a kiss on her neck then. "I got a hunch tha' I should come up here and I know why now." Tessa grinned as her head lolled to the side, giving him more skin to press his lips to.
"Are you stalking me, Mr. Dixon?" She asked him and she could feel him grin against the skin of her neck.
"Maybe . . . or maybe it was jus' a hunch. Could be somethin' that simple, ya know?" He teased and Tessa gave a laugh as her hands slid down his forearms to grasp his hands laying on her stomach, where their fingers entwined.
"Ethan said you two talked today . . ." She eventually spoke and Daryl nodded as he moved to place his chin on her shoulder.
"Yup, we did – when I dragged him outside after his spat with Merle. He . . . he opened my eyes, let me jus' say tha'."
"How is that?"
"He jus' . . . he let me know tha' I have changed – tha' I was different from when we were at tha quarry and tha farm and when we first got here. He told me tha' I didn' need Merle in my family anymore – tha' I should go back to worryin' 'bout ya and him and tha twins and he's right, Tess, he's right! I don' know why I changed – I don' know why I started actin' this way – with so much fuckin' anger, but . . . I promise ya tha' I'm gonna go back to tha Daryl tha' ya knew – tha' everyone knew before all this shit happened to us," She turned to gaze at him then and he ran the tip of one gentle finger down the bruise on her cheek. "And I swear to God tha' I won' ever touch ya again, Tess and -"
He was interrupted by Tessa smiling a small smile and placing her fingers on his mouth. Eyes connected, she watched as he grasped her hand and pressed a loving kiss to the pad of her fingers before planting the final one on the center of her palm. "I know you won't, Daryl because I saw the way you looked at me this morning. Fuck, you killed your father because he laid a hand on me! You can say whatever you want about yourself, but you're not a hypocrite and if you say that you're never going to put your hand on me in that way again, then you're not! It's that simple!"
"I also . . . I also told him about what went on between you and Merle."
"Daryl, what the fuck?"
Tessa's eyes were wide with shock and disbelief as she parted from him slightly to better face him and he gave a shrug. "I'm sorry, Tess, but he asked 'bout it and I didn' . . . at the time, I didn' think it would smart to lie to him 'bout it, speakin' he was the one who asked in the first place! I made a judgment call and he seemed to take the news with the maturity we know him for!" Tessa nodded slowly for a minute in reply, her eyes trained on his before she sighed and returned to her seat in front of him. Daryl sighed and rolled his eyes as his hands moved to rest on her thighs instead of wrapped around her waist like they were a few minutes earlier. "Tess, look, I'm sorry, but I didn' think me tellin' him would be such a big thing – tha' it would irk ya this bad! And besides, it wasn' like I told him the nitty-gritty, disgusting details, I jus' told him tha' Merle raped ya, ya left, found out ya were pregnant with him a couple of weeks later and then tha rest is history! And besides, now tha' tha whole damn thing is out, I'm surprised he didn' already know!" Tessa shook her head as she looked down at her hands lying in her lap.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have blown up at you like that, but, I just . . . I didn't want him to know because I thought he would be ashamed of me."
"Ashamed of you? What tha Hell would give ya tha' delusion?" He asked with a snort of laughter, and Tessa weakly shrugged her shoulders.
"I don't know, probably because he adores you and something made me wonder that, maybe if he knew that I had someone else other than you and Sam, that - even if it was against my will . . ." She gave a shrug. "I wouldn't be someone he would want as his mother – I don't know, it's stupid - forget I said anything." She shook her head and waved her hand dismissively through the air and they stayed in silence for a moment before she felt Daryl's arms wrap around her again, where he pulled her close to him, his chin descending onto her shoulder again.
"Now, what did I tell ya once a long, long time ago back when we were still at tha quarry – the night we first slept together? I told ya tha' ya were perfect and ya said tha' ya weren' but ya are, Tess – to me, to our son, to our twins, ya are perfect! It doesn' matter what tha fuck Merle done to ya or however many men ya've had after me, but . . . if ya not perfect, then ya pretty damn close to it. And I'm pretty sure, as far as being a mother goes, Ethan thinks ya hung the damn moon!"
"Don't be stupid, Daryl, no one's perfect – especially not in this world." She told him with a smile and he chuckled as he planted another lingering, loving kiss on the nape of her neck.
"Babydoll, in this world, ya are my one perfect, shining thing that at the end of the day makes me want to keep living," He grinned and shrugged. "Hell, if ya want to get technical, ya one of four things."
"Fuck, who has time for technicalities?" She asked with a grin and Daryl couldn't help but return it.
"Thatta girl."
