Chapter 5

Kensi was standing in the waiting area when Callen arrived. He came over to her, and she wrapped him in a hug.

"I'm so sorry, Callen."

"How is she?"

"I don't know. She's still in surgery."

He stepped back and looked at Kensi, his hands on her shoulders. "But you're okay?" he asked glancing at the bandage on her forehead.

"I'm fine."

"What happened?"

As Kensi started to tell him about what happened that morning, a doctor came out from surgery and approached them. He spoke to Kensi, "You should have told us that Ms. Kolcheck was pregnant."

Callen's hands dropped. "Pregnant?"

The doctor turned to him, "Are you Ms. Kolcheck's husband?"

"What do you mean pregnant?" Callen asked.

Kensi intervened. She spoke to the doctor, "Anna's not married. And I didn't know she was pregnant, or I would have told you."

Callen approached the doctor becoming increasingly agitated, "What do you mean she was pregnant?" The doctor stepped back and Kensi put her hand on Callen's arm, but he shook it off. "What do you mean was?"

The doctor looked at Callen with a calm, professional demeanor and spoke quietly, "If you're not related to Ms. Kolcheck, I can't answer your question. I'm sorry." And then he turned quickly and left. Callen started after him and Kensi followed.

"Wait. Wait! What do you mean was?" Callen followed the doctor as he disappeared into surgery and a nurse stepped in and blocked the door. Callen stopped and Kensi stopped beside him. She hesitated, unsure what to say.

"Callen, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

For a moment, Callen stood motionless, his head bowed, Kensi's hand on his shoulder. He closed his eyes. In all the years that Kensi had known Callen, she had never seen him cry, and he didn't now. In a moment he lifted his head and looked at her. "I'm alright, Kensi," Callen said quietly. "I just need to be alone." And he turned his back to her and walked away. Kensi watched him leave the hospital as she took a seat and waited.

By the time Hetty arrived, Callen still hadn't returned. Hetty walked straight to Kensi. "Oh, dear, you've had quite a morning." She took Kensi's hands and held them in her own with gentle strength. "It will be alright."

"Hetty, it was my fault."

"Now, Kensi, I don't want you to think about that. Tell me, how is our Anna? What have the doctors told you?" Hetty asked as she took a seat next to Kensi.

"Not much, Hetty. She's still in surgery." Kensi didn't know how to tell Hetty about Anna's pregnancy, but Hetty knew when Kensi had trouble meeting her eyes that she wasn't being told everything.

"What aren't you telling me, Ms. Blye?" And then she suddenly realized that someone was missing. "Where's Mr. Callen?"

Kensi, grateful that she could avoid the first question, answered the second. "He's here. He just wanted to be alone, so he stepped outside."

"And how long ago was that?"

Kensi looked at the clock. "A little over thirty minutes ago." She hadn't realized that much time had passed. Looking past the clock, she saw Sam and Deeks coming down the hallway. Sam was all business, walking so rapidly that Deeks was almost jogging to keep pace. Kensi rose to meet Sam, and when he reached her, she spoke with genuine pain, "Sam, it was my fault. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. Callen . . . ." Deeks stood and watched silently, knowing that only a few days ago she would have come to him for comfort.

"Kensi, it's alright," Sam said soothingly. He looked at Hetty who stood beside them. Neither one of them had seen Kensi this emotionally upset since Deeks had been arrested.

"I think," Hetty said slowly and looking steadily at Kensi, "that there is something Ms. Blye hasn't told us." She paused and waited for Kensi to reply. When she didn't, Hetty looked at Sam, "Have you noticed the absence of Mr. Callen?"

Sam, now even more concerned, held Kensi's shoulders, "Kensi, where's G? Why isn't he here? What haven't you told us?"

Kensi looked at Sam and then past him to Deeks, and she said firmly, "Deeks, you need to leave." Hetty and Sam looked more than a little confused, but Deeks' expression didn't change and she continued staring at Deeks. "You need to leave." Kensi was absolutely serious.

"Ms. Blye," Hetty began, but Kensi cut her off.

"No, Hetty."

Deeks took a few steps back. "It's not a problem, Hetty. I'll just go wait in the cafeteria," he said as he turned around and started down the corridor.

"Ms. Blye," Hetty continued, "that was uncalled for regardless of whatever problems you and Mr. Deeks are having."

"Hetty, it has nothing to do with any 'problem' I'm having with Deeks. I would have told Eric and Nell to leave if they'd been here. I only know because I was here, but I don't think Callen would like many people to know, and I have to respect that."

Sam was more worried now than when he'd first arrived as Kensi struggled to stay composed.

"Kensi," Hetty said quietly, "tell us what we don't know."

"Sam, you need to take your com out." Sam complied and then Kensi continued. "Anna was pregnant with Callen's child," she blurted.

"Oh, no," Hetty whispered and looked at Sam. She was not prepared for this news.

"And G knew?" Sam asked.

"Not until the doctor told him. I think that's the first time he knew that Anna had been pregnant—it was the first time I knew—and I think he was telling us because the baby didn't survive."

"Oh, lord," Hetty sighed, and took Kensi's hand and gave it a comforting squeeze.

"And I'm to blame, Hetty," Kensi whispered and Hetty could feel her agony. Kensi, in many ways, considered Callen an older brother, someone always looking out for her and ready to step in whenever she needed help without looking for anything in return. And now she felt responsible for the death of his child.

"You mustn't say that, Kensi," Hetty said as she led Kensi back to the chairs and they sat down together.

Sam thought back to his conversation with G that morning. Callen handled most of his personal issues alone and he had always managed to keep his emotions under control, but everybody has a breaking point. For the first time, Sam was truly worried about his partner's emotional state and what he might do.

Sam put his com back in. "Eric, find Callen's car."

Eric immediately pulled up the info and relayed it to Sam, "His car is in Griffith Park, near the observatory. It's not moving."

Sam turned to Hetty. Kensi was now much more composed as Hetty continued to console her. Sam said, "Hetty, let me know as soon as you hear about Anna's condition."

"We're not leaving, Mr. Hanna," Hetty said as Sam left the hospital to find his partner and help him fight whatever emotional demons he might be facing.