"I can't believe you," I said with a touch of disgust. Jace and I were sitting in the bartender Pete's office. He had claimed ownership of the only chair and I'd had to settle for a perch on a file cabinet (which was considerably cleaner than the floor) with Peeta curled in my lap. Luke had gone to call Clary who had apparently heard, via Isabelle, that Jace and I had vanished and was scouring the city for us. That shouldn't have made me happy, but I was possibly a little pleased.
"I know," Jace responded. "Previously you've only seen this kind of perfection in dreams."
I shook my head. As strong as his arrogant façade was, it was still a façade. "What happened after I left?"
"You mean after Maryse kicked you out?" he asked in a dry tone. "She accused me of being Valentine's accomplice and threw me out after you."
"Valentine's accomplice?" I demanded in disbelief.
Jace smiled weakly, looking completely vulnerable. "Thank you for that."
I blinked, not sure what I'd done. "For what?"
"For believing me."
"I always believe you," I blurted out before I could stop myself.
"I know," he said softly, a sad smile playing on his mouth. Something about him just looked so vulnerable and heart breaking that it kept me from being embarrassed. "The question is why?"
I met his gaze evenly. There was something defiant about his expression daring me to even think about feeling pity.
"Because I trust you."
"You barely know me," Jace spat, turning the chair away from me.
At first I didn't answer him. I turned my attention to Peeta sleeping in my lap, his little pink nose tucked into my palm and his soft tail draped over my wrist. My cat who, in some ridiculous sense, was pretty much my baby. The little animal that (according to Isabelle) had alerted her when I had "fallen" even though there was really no way he could have known. I had named him Peeta from the Hunger Games after the angel, Peliel, had made a reference to the books. Peeta seemed like a pretty intuitive cat and if he was relaxed in this situation, I figured that meant Jace was not about to attempt to rip my throat out.
"I know," I said finally, directing the words to the back of Jace's chair. "And I'm not going to pretend I know you because that would be entirely bogus. Which is why I have to trust you. I was there at Renwick's, Jace. Somewhat," I amended. "I saw enough to know that no one could act that well."
"Are you sure you just don't want to believe I'm the bad guy?" His voice was strained.
"That's part of it," I confessed. "A nice blend of fact and belief. Fantastic, like hazelnut cappuccino. Which, by the way, I had earlier and it was delicious."
I smiled when he laughed and swiveled the chair back around, still looking stressed but a touch more cheerful. "You are the epitome of random."
I shrugged. "Love me."
Jace flashed his imperfect grin and grew suddenly somber again. "Where are you going to go?"
"I don't know. I was still trying to come up with something. What about you?"
"I'm seventeen. I'm nearly an adult. I can strike out on my own – mundanes do it all the time, why can't I?"
I shook my head at him. "The difference between you and me, my dear, is that I know how to live as a mundane and you don't. You would drive yourself crazy."
"Then I'll stay with you," he said, gold eyes blazing. "You'll be eighteen soon enough. We can take care of ourselves until then and come back and draw a salary from the Clave-"
"Jace," I interrupted. My throat was tight and I had to force the word out. "No."
There was a terrible silence. "No?"
"No," I confirmed, holding my voice steady. "You can't leave the Institute, no matter what Maryse said. She's just scared which makes people do stupid things. You are a part of the Clave and the Shadow World, leaving's not an option for you. And that will just make people more suspicious about the whole Valentine thing. You have to go back."
"Come with me."
I blinked. "Jace, I can't."
"Why not?" he demanded, getting to his feet. "No matter what Maryse says you're still a Shadowhunter. The Institute is still your home and Luke and Clary both know you were never associated with Valentine. She'll listen, Jaci. We won't give her a choice."
Sensing the tension, Peeta stretched just as the door swung open to reveal Clary, Simon, and Luke. Moving quickly, Jace flung a pencil towards them. It buried itself in the door frame next to Luke's head.
"Jace!" I scolded.
He shrugged. "Sorry, didn't know it was you." His eyes narrowed when he saw Clary and Simon. "Too bad I only had one pencil."
"Pleasant," Simon commented.
"You could ignore him," I suggested, hopping off my perch, causing Peeta to fall off my lap. The cat mewled unhappily before beginning to claw his way up my jeans.
Simon stared at me blankly. "Your cat."
I glanced down at Peeta who had managed not to stab me. "I'm aware."
"Jace," Clary said, stepping forward. I noticed she and Simon were both a little winded. "Are you all right?"
He only shrugged in response to her and turned to Luke. "We're going back to the Institute."
Luke glanced at me quickly and nodded. "I hoped you would. They're your family, Jace."
"Will you come with?" I asked softly.
Luke visibly paled and began to stammer out an excuse but Jace interrupted him.
"Please."
That one word hung in the air and for a moment, no one bothered to disturb it; the proof that Jace really was human.
"All right," Luke said with a sigh. "Let's go."
It seemed that recently I was spending more and more time mad at Clary. I'd tried to be understanding of her terrible mood swings at first, ignoring the things she said and just dealing with it, but enough was enough. Sitting around whining and snapping at people was not going to help our- her mother. Plus I was just having a terrible day in general so when Luke was talking to one of his pack members and Clary took the opportunity to dismiss Simon, I grabbed both his and Jace's wrists and started off towards the Institute. I was sick of her using Simon; it was about damn time he got to tag along.
"Why are we bringing the mundane?" Jace asked, flexing his hand as I towed them both along.
"Don't call Simon that," I ordered, noticing the movement and being a little bit pleased he was uncomfortable.
I caught Jace's glance at Simon. "Sorry. Why are we bringing Simon?"
"Because," I said, stopping and looking over my shoulder to make sure Clary and Luke were following, "he's my brother."
"I am?" Simon asked, surprised.
"He is?" Jace asked in the same tone.
I let go of both of them so I could check on Peeta: asleep. "Yes. He is."
Jace's blonde eyebrows were hidden in his hair. "How do you figure?"
"Well, seeing as I have no biological family to speak of, I figure I get to pick," I explained.
"I don't think it works that way," Simon pointed out in a sullen tone. I felt bad for him. Sure, he wanted to come along but it was obvious he wanted to have been invited by Clary, not me. As usual, I was the second option.
"You can leave if you want," I suggested.
He just scowled, but moved to stand closer to me when Clary and Luke finally caught up. Clary was also remaining an awkward distance from Simon.
Jace noticed and scoffed. "Mature."
"I don't like this," Simon said once we'd reached the steps of the Institute.
"You don't have to be here," Clary said testily.
"Speaking of here and the idea of being," I cut in before the situation could get any more angsty, "does my stele happen to be here, Clarissa?"
Luke shot me a curious glance. "You have a stele?"
"Not at the moment," I said, turning my attention to Jace who was staring blankly at the door as though he'd never seen one before.
"I forgot," he said finally, meeting my gaze, "Maryse took my keys when she kicked me out."
"You shouldn't need a key," Luke said. "An Institute should be open to any Shadowhunter who means the occupants no harm."
"And what if the occupants mean us harm?" Jace asked in a cynical tone.
Luke half smiled. "I don't think that matters."
"Funny how that works," I muttered.
Jace reached out and took my hand, only then drawing my attention to the fact that I had been fidgeting with my hem. I was completely caught off guard, not used to any sort of public contact and I felt my face grew hot but I didn't withdraw my hand. I liked the feel of his over mine.
He placed his other hand on the door. "In the name of the Clave I ask entry to this holy place. And in the name of the Angel Raziel, I ask your blessings on my mission against-"
With a mildly eerie groan, the doors swung open revealing the dim interior of the church-like part of the Institute. Jace pulled me inside with him, walking ahead of the others. His jaw was set and he was silent. There was something odd about that, generally he would be saying something, usually of the rude variety but I didn't really mind. I was unreasonably nervous for this encounter and all the reassurance I needed was his hand holding mine like it was his lifeline to the world. He was my anchor at that moment; literally and metaphorically.
We were a silent group as we made our way to the elevator, Luke breaking the quiet with a remark on the interior design. I knew he was trying to lighten the mood but it failed miserably.
Church met us at the top of the stairs and immediately set off, as though he was marching us to our deaths. I shuddered at the thought and internally cursed myself again for being an idiot. What if they had found the books? I clutched Jace's hand tighter.
"Are you all right, Jaci?" Simon asked on my other side. "You just went really pale."
I forced a smile. "I'm fine, just a headache."
Clary shot me a sidelong glance at that. I only got headaches when I was completely exhausted and she knew I was lying. But she didn't have time to call me out on it before we reached the library.
Maryse had her back to us as the door swung open, swishing softly over the carpet. From the back, she looked almost exactly like Isabelle and it was unnerving. But what was even more unnerving was the glittering smile from the figure who stood before her, facing towards us. Raphael. Well, his projection.
"Raphael?" Clary gasped as though she had never considered the possibility of him existing anymore.
Raphael said something in response but I missed it. Maryse had turned and met my eyes. She held my gaze trapped in eyes the same intense blue as her son's. Conveyed in that one look was mistrust, curiosity, caution, and – something that didn't quite make sense – recognition. I didn't bother to think on it long, just glad that outright hatred wasn't present.
"Jace," Maryse said, turning her piercing gaze to her adopted son, her voice colored with anxiety. "Did something happen? Why are you back so soon? I thought you were going to stay with-" She cut off at sight of the others in the room. "And who are you?"
"Jace's sister," Clary said quietly.
Maryse nodded curtly. "You look like Valentine." There was a touch of disgust in her tone. I didn't bother to get upset about it, might as well have Mrs. Lightwood hate all of us, not just me and Jace. "You brought a rogue, your sister, and a couple of mundanes with you?" she demanded of Jace. It's not safe for any of you here, especially mundanes."
"But I'm not a mundane," Luke said softly. "And we are perfectly capable of keeping Simon safe."
"But who- Lucian."
Luke gave a very fake impression of a smile. "Hello, Maryse. It's been a long time."
