Hellooo I'm finally back :) I'm really sorry for the wait. Hope you're still willing to read this story! I'm trying to update regularly again.
Thank you for the reviews, they still mean a lot to me. And yeah, I am an evil genius :D well.. at least evil.

I know my grammar and spelling sucks and everything, and I'm sorry about that. But there's not much I can do except learning and that's exactly what I'm doing so I hope you understand :)

I've got kind of a longer chapter here for ya.. I think you deserve it!

I still don't own Friends, damn it.


Chapter Eighteen

Ross turned to look at Monica. He could see the pure hurt in her eyes. He'd seen her hurt before, but this time it was a different kind. He looked away from her and scratched his neck, trying to figure out how to explain it to her. He knew Chandler had not told her about the possibility of him already being a father, and wasn't sure if he could tell.

"He's going out with Kathy?" Monica asked again, with a slightly stronger voice.

Ross couldn't come up with any excuses in those seconds. He sighed. "Yeah, he is." Monica closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "But it's not what you think, I swear", Ross said and stood up from the couch.

"What am I thinking?" Monica asked quickly.

"It's not what you think, Mon", Ross repeated.

"Then what is it?"

Ross shook his head. "I can't tell you", he said. Monica sighed. "I'm sorry", he added.

"Why can't you tell me if it's not what I think it is?" Monica asked.

"Because Chandler will tell you if he wants", Ross said. "But I promise it's certainly not what you think."

"Stop saying that", Monica said, irritated. "Don't you think it's my right to know why my fiance is taking out his ex-girlfriend?"

"Okay", Ross sighed. He didn't want to be the one to tell the story but he couldn't leave her only with that either. He walked up to Monica and took her hands in his. "You know that.. Kathy has a baby", Ross started, but that was enough for Monica to realize.

Her eyes widened. "Oh my god", she said. "It's.. it's Chandler's?"

"We don't know. He's about to find out", Ross said.

Monica sat down in the armchair, shocked. "Wow", she finally managed to say. "You're right, that is so not what I was thinking."

"I know", Ross nodded and sat down on the couch again. "Are you okay?"

Monica turned to look at him. "What if it's his?" she asked.

Ross sighed. "That's not really probable."

Monica buried her face in her hands. "Gosh, this is so not what I needed right now.."

Ross frowned. "You're my sister and I love you.. but so not what you needed right now? Think about Chandler", he said. "I could tell the whole story but I'm sure that's not necessary.. But what I'm not sure of is if he can handle everything by himself."

Monica nodded slowly in her hands before dropping them. "You're right", she said. "I have to be supportive, and I will be."

Ross looked at her for a minute. "It's gonna be okay, Mon", he said with a slight smile. "I mean everything. And whatever happens, we'll be there for you. You're never going to end up alone."

"I know", Monica said quietly.

"I'm gonna be an uncle", Ross grinned. Monica gave him a warm smile as he hugged her.


Chandler was sitting in a coffeehouse waiting for Kathy. It was a place she'd suggested, once he didn't want to meet her in Central Perk mainly because of his friends. He had ordered his coffee already and was sipping it nervously. He still didn't know what to say to her, how to ask. All he knew was that soon he might suddenly become a dad. Obviously he knew the whole thing could be totally ridiculous and pointless, and honestly he did think Kathy would've told him if it's true, but he was still terrified.

Chandler stared at the door, mentally fighting against the urge to run away. He sighed nervously. He had to do this, after this it would all be great..

His thoughts were interrupted by the people in the next table. There was a couple with two children. The smaller kid had started to cry so the guy lift her in his armsand held her. The woman handed him a bottle of milk, and he started to feed their baby girl. He smiled as she sucked the bottle. Chandler watched them for a minute. He could have a family like them. It could be him and Monica and their children, without old mustache guys orblondeactresses. This family seemed happy, why couldn't they be? And there he was, sitting in a strange coffeehouse waiting for his ex, who was by the way 20 minutes late.

Maybe she wasn't coming at all. Maybe she'd discovered the reason of this meeting and chose not to come. Chandler glanced at the door again. She wasn't coming, at least he was hoping so. He quickly got up and headed to the door to leave. As he stepped out, he heard a familiar voice comingfrom his left.

"Chandler!"

He turned around. "Oh.. Hi, Kathy", he greeted with an awkward smile. Damn it. "I was just, um.."

"I know I'm late and I'm so sorry! I took a cab here and the driver was just horrible.. sorry", Kathy apologized.

"Yeah, it's okay", Chandler shrugged.

"I hope you still wanna have coffee?" Kathy asked hopefully.

"I kinda had one already but okay", Chandler smiled nervously. There's no turning back.

They went inside, tookseatsand ordered coffee.

"So, why did you call me? Is everything okay?" Kathy asked then.

"Well, it's um.. Yeah. I mean it was great seeing you then and.. despite of all the stuff few years ago I think we could still be, y'know, friends", Chandler said.

"Really?"

"If you want to."

Kathy smiled in agreementas the waitress brought their drinks.

"So, what's going on with you? Wedding coming?" Kathy asked him curiously, drinking her coffee.

"I guess.. Not quite yet though", Chandler said,not really knowing what was going to happen with that either.

"I'm happy for you", Kathy said. Chandler sighed quietly. "Is it okay for Monica that we're friends? Just asking, I mean if I had a boyfriend who'd see his ex, I'd be kinda suspicious."

"Yeah, it's fine. We trust each other completely", Chandler said, slightly amused. Kathy nodded. "What about you? Busy with the work?" he asked.

"Not so with the work, but Alice is making sure I have plenty to do. Maybe even too well at times", Kathy laughed.

"Alice?"

"My daughter I told you about. Babies are unbelievable.. but really sweet and lovable, too."

"Obviously", Chandler cleared his throat, "how old is she, by the way?"

"Five months", Kathy said, and suddenly turned serious. Chandler sighed for relief. Alice wasn't his. He felt a weight falling off his shoulders, but soon the look on Kathy's face got his full attention. "What's wrong?"

Kathy looked down. "Erm.. Chandler, there's something you need to know", she bit her lip, clearly struggling. "I wasn't going to tell you this but I really have to. I.. After we broke up.. I-I had an abortion."

Chandler's mouth dropped open at her words. "Wh-what?" hegasped.

"It was yours. I'm sorry, I should've told you a long time ago", Kathy said quietly staring at her cup of coffee, ignoring his shocked gaze.

Chandler didn't know what to say. He sat there staring at her for several minutes before he managed to speak. "A-are you.. Why didn't you.."

"I was scared. It was the most scared I've ever been in my life, Chandler, and I didn't know what to do. I panicked and I was sure it wasn't what you wanted. I wasn't ready either. I.. I haven't told anyone, not even to my closest friends about this."

Chandler saw the tears in her eyes. He opened and closed his mouth few times to say something, but he couldn't. He just stayed quiet and movedto hug her tightly.

"I don't know, maybe I should've kept it. At least I should've told you", Kathy sobbed. "I'm sorry, you're getting married and all and this is just awful."

"I'm glad you told me", Chandler said andlet out a deep sigh.


"What?!" Rachel, Ross, Phoebe and Joey yelled in unison.

"Exactly", Chandler said and sat on Joey's chair.

"Kathy had an abortion?" Rachel frowned.

"Yes, and decided not to tell me about any of it", Chandler sighed.

"Oh god", Ross said.

"So shepracticallykilled your baby behind your back?" Joey asked.

"This is unbelievable!" Phoebe said. "I mean what more can happen?"

"I know", Chandler said and ran his fingers through his hair. "What should I do?"

"Well, there's not much you can do about it anymore", Ross sighed.

"How do you feel about this?" Rachel asked and sat on the arm of Joey's chair.

"I don't know, she should've told me. Why didn't she tell me?" Chandler said and shook his head, still not believing what had happened.

"Oh honey, I don't know", Rachel said and hugged him. Phoebe gave him a hug too.

"I know I would've freaked out big time, everyone knows that", Chandler said.

"Yeah, but still", Phoebe said.

Rachel shook her head in disbelief. "God, what birth control were you using?"

Chandler rolled his eyes. "Seriously, what do I do?"

"You have to tell Monica, I guess", Ross said.

"Why? Why should I tell her?" Chandler asked.

"Because you have to", Ross said.

"I know", Chandler sighed. "But.. it's past, all gone. Doesn't matter anymore."

"Don't you think that's why you should forgive her too?" Joey said.

Chandler let out a snort. "Kind of a different situation we're discussing."

"How are things going with you two?" Rachel asked.

"I don't know.. Although, I've managed to stop picturing her having sex with Richard."

"But that's great!" Rachel said.

"Yeah but I had this dream last night where they were teaching their kid how to ride a bike, and I was back together with Janice 'cause for whatever reason I didn't wanna go through that crazy snakeman -thing.. But in the end it seemed such a tempting option."

"I believe ya.." Joey said. "But trust me, it's gonna be you and Monica, not Richard and Monica."

"Well yeah, itshouldbe be and Monica", Chandler said. "But I don't know if that's gonna happen."

"Just get over it, man. Do something", Joey said.

"It's not that simple, Joe", Chandler groaned.

"Maybe you've already forgiven her", Phoebe suggested. "You just don't know it yet." Chandler sighed, shaking his head. "You love her, she loves you, it's perfect! If you guys broke up, I.. I don't know, it's just not right", Phoebe said.

"What she did is just not right", Chandler muttered.

"She's never done anything like that before. I know my sister, you should know her too", Ross said.

"And yet she still did it, with loads of consequences."

"Would you just get it already?" Ross said. "Just.. give her another chance, she won't blow it. She made a mistake and learned from it. She wouldn't do something like that again, and you know that."

"I don't know, that's the problem. How could I know anymore?" Chandler said. "And why should I always be working things out? Maybe it's her turn to do something. She was the one to cheat on me in the first place, and getting knocked up. If she truly loves me and wants to be with me, as everyone claims, why isn't she doing anything? Why isn't she even trying to make it up to me? I don't get it."

"Maybe she doesn't know how to make it up to you. Maybe she's afraid that she might mess it up", Joey said.

"Well I don't know if she can any more, we've kind of reached the top already", Chandler murmured.

"See, his is making you and Monica both so miserable. Why can't you just talk and work things out?" Rachel asked.

"Oh you're the one to talk. Were you guys on a break or..?" Chandler asked, glancingRachel and Ross.

"Shut up", Rachel said and glared at him. "The thing is, Monica's always wanted a baby, and now she's going to have one. The situation here isn't very admirable but anyway, she's having a child and she should be happy. She did a horrible thing but just.. forget about it for a second. She's pregnant and probably feeling kinda lonely at the moment, and I bet she's scared too. The baby might or might not be yours but you should be there for her 'cause if you're not and it's yours, you're gonna regret it later. And we can't replace you being there, nobody can."

"Rachel's right. You need to go and be there for her, be supportive", Phoebe said and motioned towards the door.

"And she's gonna be there for you, too", Ross added.

"So that's what you guys would do if you were me? I mean, I should just go there and pretend to be happy?" Chandler asked and held uphis hands.

"Yes if that's what it takes from you to go there and try!" Phoebe said. "Richard's not there, thank god he isn't. Yet. But if you don't do something like right now, he might come and you will end up alone or worse, with Janice. Your nightmare will come true. Is that what you want? All because you were too lazy to get your ass up out from this chair, go across the hall and talk to Monica. That's not what you want Chandler, is it?"

"I'm not too lazy to get my.."

"Get up then! Go go go go", Phoebe cut him off. Chandler gave her a confused look, but stood up and got out of the apartment.

"Phoebs, that was mean", Rachel said, looking slightly worried.

"Well, I got mine", Phoebe said and sat on Joey's chair.

Rachel sighed. "I'm gonna go talk to him", she said and left the apartment, followed by Joey.

They found Chandler standing in the hall.

"Hey.. Are you okay?" Rachel asked him.

"No. I wish I was", Chandler sighed.

Rachel hugged him. "You will be."

"What are you going to do?" Joey asked Chandler.

"I don't know. I hate this.. I want to forget everything and move forward but I just can't, you know?" Chandler said. "I guess I really need to pull myself together and talk things through with Monica."

"Yeah", Rachel and Joey said.

"Wow, it's weird", Chandler said after few seconds of silence.

"What is?" Joey asked.

"Everything, actually", Chandler snorted, "but it's weird how just a few years can change you, like.. Kathy said one of the reasons she didn't tell me back then was that she knew it wasn't what I wanted. And she's right, it wasn't what I wanted and I would've totally freaked out. But now, I'm so hoping to have a kid."

"You're really growing up, aren't you?" Rachel smiled. "But maybe it's not about change. Maybe it's about the person you're having the baby with. Unlike Kathy, Monica is the right one for you."

"Yeah.. I just never thought I'd wanna be a dad. I'm actually scaring myself."

Rachel smiled. "If Monica's not having your baby, God must have no idea what he's doing."

"Yeah, and I should never have let you date Kathy. Sorry man", Joey shook his head.

"I guess that's excusable", Chandler laughed. "Thanks, guys."

"Anytime, pal", Rachel grinned. "But I'm gonna go now. Be nice to her", she said to Chandler and left.

"I need to get back in there too, but if you need-"

"I know. Thanks", Chandler cut Joey off.

"Good luck, man", Joey patted him on the shoulder and went back to his apartment.

Chandler was left alone in the hallway, staring at the green door with the number 20 on it. It had been a long time since he'd felt this nervous opening that door.. It must've been right after the London trip. This time he wasn't going to ask if being on London time counts, but he was about to find out something else. He exhaled nervously, and opened the door.


If that was too unrealistic or something, I apologize 'cause this chapter's been the hardest one to write so far! I don't know why, but it's true. And because of my awesomeness I had to rewrite the whole thing once.. Plus, I've watched lots of soap opera lately so.. :D you know what it does to the human brain.

Enough with the excuses..

Reviews? :)