Thank you so very much! This "you are an amazing writer"-stuff makes me so happy :D Although I just noticed there's some crappy writing I've done before, but yeah, can't help it :D
Also, if you haven't checked out my story Never Planned, which is obviously a Mondler story too, go take a look :) Its plot is probably a bit lighter than this, or whatever..

Anyway, I love you all, and here's the next chapter!


Chapter Twenty-one

Since the fight they'd had few weeks earlier, Monica and Chandler had barely spoken to each other except for trivial, everyday stuff. It had gotten awkward. They had both said things they didn't mean, and didn't want that to happen again. It was clear that Chandler didn't want to leave, and Monica didn't want him to leave. They obviously wanted to be together but didn't know how, so they just kept quiet. It had become their coping method. Of course that wasn't what they wanted, but they couldn't sort things out either. It was complicated.

Monica was now about four and a half months pregnant. It had all gone great, there had been no problems at all.. Except for one. She'd been finding herself very.. well, literally horny. She'd read about it, how hormones start really going crazy in the fourth month of pregnancy. And then there was Phoebe and the Evander Holyfield phase few years ago when she was in her fourth month. It all made perfect sense, but she found herself pathetic and sort of kinky. She'd imagine all these pictures and fantasies in her head while daydreaming. She'd go to bed early to wait for Chandler and watch him change. She'd even surprised him in the shower once on purpose. It was really weird but she couldn't help it, and it just got worse day by day. She didn't know if he knew about this, she hoped not 'cause she couldn't tell him either. After all this drama going on between them, they felt so distant from each other. But she also knew, creating fantasies wasn't enough anymore. It was hard for her to admit it even to herself, but it was true; she just couldn't contain herself.

Monica went to bed early to wait for Chandler, as usual. This time she had more in her mind than just watching him change his shirt, but she was nervous. She'd probably never been this nervous about sex, but she was afraid he'd turn her down. She couldn't remember when was the last time he'd done that, if ever, but now she was worried. She couldn't even wear anything seductive because of her stomach, and she didn't even feel sexy. She wondered if Chandler still found her attractive..

When Chandler finally came to the bedroom, Monica was wide awake. She lay on her back and watched him change. She could see his bare chest in the moonlight coming from the window. But when he put on a t-shirt, she couldn't help but letting out a disappointed sigh. She once again told herself how pathetic she was being. Maybe this is how men feel all the time?

Monica gulped quietly when Chandler made his way to his side of the bed and lay there next to her. After all that had happened, she didn't know how to initiate sex. And it's usually men who do this initiating part, anyway. But now she needed to. Before lying there for a minute and thinking what to do, she snuggled close to him under the covers. She could tell he was surprised and a little confused, but he didn't say anything. She rested her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arm around him.

She could smell his scent, it was something she'd missed so much. They did sleep in the same bed and all, but it had been awhile since she'd been this close to him. She kissed his cheek tentatively. When he still didn't do or say anything, she decided to go for it.

"I love you," she whispered against his skin. He sighed, but she couldn't tell if it was a sigh of annoyment or pleasure. She placed few kisses on his neck. "I miss you," she whispered and her hand started to wander lower his body. Just before she was reaching his boxers, he stopped her. He took her hand and pushed it away. She should've known it. He rejected her.

Chandler lifted his head to look at her for the first time now. "Mon.. what? Why?" he asked quietly.

Monica pulled away to mirror his gaze. She studied his face in the dark. "I.. I miss you, Chandler."

He shook his head disbelievingly. "So you just suddenly miss me so much you wanna have sex or something?"

"Why can't we just.. do things normally? Don't you miss it?" Monica sighed. "I love you."

Chandler could tell she wasn't being completely honest. "I think this is about something else," he said. "I've read those magazines. Y'know, fourth month might be tough time for a loner." He had noticed she'd been acting pretty oddly and now he figured it might be that.

"Oh come on, you think that's the reason why I want to have sex?"

"Yeah, you can't control yourself. You're just.. horny."

"What? Of course I can control myself. And I'm not horny. You're horny!" Monica chuckled nervously, knowing that was probably the lamest line ever, especially since he was the one who'd just refused to have sex. "You think I'm like an animal or something? I'll show you some self-control." She rolled over to her side of the bed again. She let out a deep sigh and closed her eyes to go to sleep. Chandler didn't bother to say anything.

After twenty minutes she was still awake and even more restless. She couldn't sleep and as she looked at Chandler, she noticed he wasn't still asleep either, although his eyes were closed. Her gaze dropped to his lips. His lips that were so soft, amazing.. God, she missed his kisses. And his hands. His long fingers that could do anything. While she dreamed about that, she didn't realize that Chandler was staring at her back.

"You just can't get it out of your mind, huh?" he asked with a gloating smile on his face.

Monica winced slightly. She couldn't deny it anymore. "Okay, fine, I'm a pervert! You're right, I'm horny as hell and I've never felt this way. These past couple of days have been awful! It's like, it's almost painful," she finally admitted, and moved close to him again. "I know you probably think I'm a freak and disgusting, but please, Chandler. Just once. Is that too much to ask?"

"Interesting. Usually this is the other way around," Chandler smirked.

"Chandler, come on!" Monica groaned. "I-I need you. I want you. Please, let me make love to my fiancé. Seriously, this is unbelievable! I mean I'm going crazy here and if-"

"Shhh," Chandler cut her off. "Okay, okay."

Monica frowned. "What?"

He didn't answer, he just closed the gap between their lips and kissed her, long and passionate. She closed her eyes, even that gave her so much pleasure. She was surprised he'd given in so quickly but she didn't have time to think of that as he rolled on top of her. She ran her fingers through his hair like so many times before, willingly letting him deepen their kiss.

Minutes later he pulled back in the need of air. He stared into her eyes as she gasped slightly. "It's said that a woman begging is the biggest turn on ever. I'm not gonna disagree."

Monica smiled. "But I still miss you, so much."

"I know.. I miss you too," Chandler whispered before kissing her again.


About a week later Monica was feeling much better. That one night had been great, amazing, and she was even more convinced about how important it was to make their relationship work. Even though some outsiders could tell they were a normal, happy couple with a baby coming, in reality the truth wasn't so simple. So, Monica had again brought up the idea of going to a therapist, and after the longest persuasion, he'd reluctantly agreed. It was true, he was never going to win again. At least she secretly hoped so.

"So.. What do you think?" Monica asked Chandler as they were walking home from their therapist. They had just finished their first session. The therapist had suggested lots of things, and some of them sounded completely ridiculous to both Chandler and Monica, although Monica wouldn't admit it.

"I don't know", Chandler muttered honestly. He'd felt really awkward the whole time which wasn't a surprise.

"Come on", Monica said. "I know you didn't like being there and all, and it wasn't really an amazing experience for me either but.. just try."

Chandler sighed. "I think the guy may have a point."

"You think? About what?"

"Some of the stuff he said."

"Like what?"

"Well.. He said we should warm things up and start creating nice, positive memories again or whatever it was. I mean, that's the kind of advice you get when you've been 25 years married but we are where we are, so.. I think he's right."

"Okay.. and how do we do that?"

"I don't know", Chandler shrugged. "Maybe we could take a trip or something."

Monica turned to look at him. "A trip?"

"Yeah, maybe. You know, somewhere to relax and clear our minds and so."

Monica nodded appreciatively. "Wow, I'm proud of you."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I mean first of all you agreed to go there, but that you actually heard him out, it's great."

"Well I'm not paying the guy for nothing," Chandler laughed.

Monica gave him a smile. "So, where do you think we should go?"

Chandler frowned. "Home?"

"I'm talking about the trip," Monica laughed.

"Oh.. I don't know. You get to decide."

"Okay.. I'll have to give it a thought. When are we leaving?"

"That's up to you, too."

"Nice," Monica smiled. "I'm thinking pretty soon, if that's okay. I mean, what is there to wait?"

"Exactly," Chandler said. "And you can't even fly in your third trimester."

Monica looked at him, stunned. "How do you know that?"

"That's why Phoebs didn't come to Ross's wedding in London, right?" Chandler said.

Monica gave him a suspicious look. "Yeah, but.. Somehow that doesn't sound like something you would remember."

"You're right," Chandler said. "I read it in a baby magazine. That stuff is addictive!"

"Aww," Monica grinned. She felt truly happy for hearing those kind of things that showed how excited Chandler was about the baby and becoming a parent, but it was also scary 'cause they didn't know if there was a huge disappointment coming. She didn't want to even think of that.

"I know, scary huh?" Chandler said. "But I kinda thank Phoebe for not being there."

"In London?"

"Yeah. She would totally have figured us out."

"Right," Monica chuckled. She really enjoyed these kind of little talks with Chandler these days, but she'd started to feel like there should be much more to enjoy together. They really needed to do something about their relationship, and fast. The mention of London brought her good memories, and maybe she could try making the next trip something just as unforgettable.


So, what do you think? What does Monica have on her mind?

Please leave a review! They'll make me write faster.. maybe :D