I DO NOT OWN DEATH NOTE!

Mello groaned when he reached his room. The light was shining under his door. He knew it had been off when he and Near left it earlier because it hadn't been on in the first place. He opened the door and found what he expected to find. Matt was sitting a chair by the windows with his gameboy in his hands. He was deep enough into his game that he only lifted his eyebrows when Mello closed the door behind him and walked to his bed.

"Why are you in my room, Matt?" Mello crossed his arms and glared at the other boy.

"One sec." Beeping noises floated across the room from the game Matt was playing. Mello watched impatiently as Matt finished what he was doing and turned it off, stuffing it into the pocket of his jacket. "Alright. Tell me."

"Tell you what, exactly?"

"Tell me why you are hanging out with Near and why he is following you around like a lost puppy."

"He isn't following me around. And if you must know, we are spending time together because L told us too."

Matt snorted and shook his head. "Bullshit, Mello. L has been telling you that for years and it only ever made you mad. It has never made you hang out with him before."

"Yeah, well maybe I decided to listen this time." Mello turned his back on Matt and started to strip out of his clothes. He pulled open his wardrobe and grabbed a clean pair of boxers and a t-shirt to sleep in.

"Right. You and I both know that's a lie." Matt stood and walked up behind Mello. He ran his fingers over the scratch marks on the other boys back. "And I supposed you got these falling out of a tree or something, huh?"

Mello slammed the doors of his wardrobe shut and spun around to face Matt. "It's none of your business how I got them."

"Fuck you, Mello. I thought we were best friends. Now you not only turn your back on me for Near of all people, but your fucking him , too?"

Mello felt his face redden in anger. "Lower your voice. I said it's none of your business."

"It is my business when I come to your room before dinner to tell you something and your door in locked and I hear the obvious sounds of you fucking someone on the other side."

"Shut up. What I do in my room is private. For all you know I was watching a porn and jacking off or something."

Matt laughed bitterly and shook his head. "Right. Watching a porn. A porn featuring you and Near." He turned his back on Mello to hide the tears welling up in his eyes. "I hope it was worth it."

"Worth what?" Mello pulled on the clean clothes and walked past Matt to sit on his bed.

"Worth ruining our friendship."

"What about me being friends with Near makes you think I wont still be friends with you. It is possible to have more then one friend you know." Mello leaned back against his pillows and folded his hands in his lap.

"You are more then just friends with him. You can lie to me about it all you want but I know the truth. And I cant be friends with you if you are giving Near what I was hoping to one day have from you."

Mello blinked and raised his eyebrows. "What are you talking about?"

Matt spun around and jumped on Mello. Tears were running down his face and his eyes were flaming with anger. "You know damn well what I mean." He gripped Mello's shoulders and pinned him to the bed as he crushed their lips together painfully.

Mello gripped Matt's arms and pushed him away roughly. "What the fuck, Matt?"

"You think I told you all that shit about sex with another man just out of morbid curiosity? I told you because I wanted to do it with you, you asshole."

Mello ground his teeth and sat up. "If you wanted that, you should have said something, dickhead. How was I supposed to know you wanted to fuck me if you never said anything?"

"I thought it would be obvious! Do you think I watch dirty movies and jack off with other guys? Fuck you if you think that. I was hoping you would get the hint and it would turn into something more."

"Well good job with the hints, buddy. I couldn't tell a damn thing from them. How was I supposed to know you never did it with anyone else? You talked about that shit like you knew from personal experience. I thought you were just sharing what you had done before. Where did you learn it if not from doing it?"

Matt blushed and looked away from Mello. "Alright, so I have done it before. What does it matter to you?"

"You could have told me, Matt. Who did you do it with?"

Matt ran his fingers through his hair and sighed. "With Eric. You remember him?"

Mello frowned. "The older boy who used to give you the games he was finished playing?"

"Yeah, that's him."

"Didn't he turn 16 a few months ago and leave the house?"

"Right. He went to live with some uncle who didn't want him when his parents died because he was to young. Now that he's old enough to put to work he let him go live there."

"So when did you do it with him?"

"Last year. He told me to come to his room because he had more games for me. When I got there he asked me if I had ever had a blow job. I didn't even know what that was then and he laughed at me and told me he would show me. So he did it and I liked it. He asked if I wanted to learn more that would feel good. When I told him I did, he took his clothes off and fucked me."

"Why didn't you tell me, Matt? I thought we told each other everything?"

Matt turned to glare at Mello again. "You didn't tell me about you and Near. I only know because I found out on my own by hearing you. Would you have told me at all?"

"Maybe, someday."

"Well I didn't want you to know, okay? I thought you wouldn't like me anymore if I told you." Matt hung his head again and used the back of his hand to wipe away his tears.

"Did he force you?"

Matt shook his head. "No. It felt good until he was inside me, then it hurt for a while."

"Did you tell him to stop?"

Matt nodded. "He said to relax and it would feel better. He didn't lie. It felt good. I wanted to do it again, but not with him."

"I'm sorry, Matt. If you had told me before, I don't know, maybe I would have done it with you."

"But not now. Now you have Near." Matt practically spit out the boys name.

Mello felt himself get angry again. "You have no right to be mad at me, Matt. You didn't tell me you liked me like that. But, yes, I'm with Near now. But I still want to be your friend."

Matt shook his head and stood. "Friends. Right. Maybe. But not right now. I know I have no right to be mad at you but I am. I don't want to be friends with you right now. Maybe when I calm down, or when you get tired of being with Near. Maybe." Matt walked to the door and left.

Mello sat in stunned silence for a while. He didn't completely understand what had just happened. He stood and walked to his bathroom and stripped off his clothes again. It wasn't until he was adjusting the water temperature that he remembered that he had told Near he would be in his room to take a shower with him.

Shutting the water off, he put his clothes back on, turned off all his lights, and locked his door behind him and he snuck down the hallways to Near's room.