9.

"I took the day off." Effie announced the Monday following the party and subsequent sleepover. Katniss and Peeta had just run to the school's gate. "Portia and Cinna will mind the shop. I was wondering..."

"Yeah." he agreed at once.

She flashed him a blinding smile and he smirked, not even protesting when she slipped her hand into his like they were teenagers instead of grown adults. The walk to her car felt endless, the drive was worse even though it barely lasted more than five minutes. His hand remained possessively on her thigh during the whole time, his little finger inching further under her skirt every few minutes. She was flustered by the time they finally reached his house.

They almost didn't make it past the front door. He pinned her against the hard wood, bundling her skirt around her hips and dropping his pants right there. She wrapped her legs around his waist, holding on to his shoulders, and urged him to forget about any foreplay.

The whole thing was so ridiculous, this need for the other was so ridiculous, that they both started laughing halfway through.

It was still good. Better than good even.

He decided she looked at her best when she was recovering from a blissful orgasm, her cheeks flushed and her hair in disarray, her blue eyes sparkling with pleasure. He dragged her to his bed and peeled her clothes off her body, nowhere near ready for a round two but determined to get her to that place of utter abandon again.

A panting, wriggling and begging Effie coming apart under his mouth wasn't too bad either.

"I am keeping you." she hummed afterward, burrowing against his side. She looked like a ragdoll. "You are entirely too good at this. I am keeping you."

"Good to know I pass the test, sweetheart." he snorted. "Take a nap. You'll need the energy later."

Her grin was soft and sleepy but clearly amused. "I will hold you to that."

She fell asleep quickly and Haymitch drifted off, not intending to actually sleep until he found himself in the throes of a nightmare. Everything was blurry, he was only conscious of being attacked and when he finally managed to open his eyes, he realized he had her pinned under him to the mattress, his hands wrapped around her throat. She was struggling to get free.

He jumped back and away from the bed, his hands badly shaking.

She coughed and sat up, rubbing at the sore skin of her throat.

He wanted to apologize but he couldn't find the words. How did you apologize for almost killing someone in your sleep? It was lucky he had gotten rid of the knife the second Katniss had put a foot in his house. God, Katniss... It could have been the kid, she crept in his bed often enough after one of her own nightmares...

He had been doing good on that front, considering. His sleep pattern was still abysmal and he still had bad dreams but they were manageable, he usually woke up before it got that bad. His body had grown used to sharing the space with a tiny human. He didn't know why Effie would be any different. He didn't know why... And if Effie wasn't safe, it meant Katniss wasn't safe and really what had he been thinking all along? Pretending he could have a normal life when...

"When you said PTSD I didn't quite expect that." Effie whispered softly, after clearing her throat a few times. "I suppose it was my fault. You were having a nightmare, I tried to shake you awake. I... Perhaps that wasn't the cleverest idea on retrospect."

He shook his head. "Never shake me awake." His mind took that as an aggression and he couldn't tell the difference between dream and reality anymore. At least that explained that, he figured. But... "Are you... Did I..." He let the sentence trail off, at a loss for words.

"I think I'm fine." she said, searching for his eyes. He averted his. "I might have to use a scarf for a few days."

If it was a joke it was a poor one. She was a little shaken but she seemed to hold on quite well. He turned his back on her and grabbed clothes from a nearby drawer, slipping things on at random.

"You should go." he said.

"Why?" she frowned. "It is still early. We have some time before we need to pick up the children."

"Why?" he scoffed, disbelieving. "I almost strangled you."

"Keyword being almost." she pointed out. "And believe it or not, it is not worse than some of the things I saw in a bedroom. Show business is not a pretty industry."

He scoffed again, running his shaking fingers through his hair and forcing himself to take deep breaths. He was upset and overwhelmed and there was only one way to get himself back on track when it was that bad.

He was contemplating the closest place to get a glass of whiskey when he heard the rustling of sheets. He figured she was leaving but she tiptoed closer and wrapped her arms around him from behind instead.

"I am fine." she whispered. "I promise I am fine. I am not angry either."

"Yeah, well, you should be." he spat.

She pushed up the tee-shirt he had just slipped on and pressed a kiss between his shoulder blades. "You didn't intend to hurt me, Haymitch. It is alright. I understand."

Her tone was soothing and her lips were soft. His racing heart started to slow down as she peppered his back with kisses. He let her take the tee-shirt off, simply lifting his arms to help but otherwise remaining passive. Her hands prompted him to turn around, to face her, and he did so with shame.

"I'm fucked up." he murmured, staring at her bare feet. Her toes were painted a vivid shade of red. "I'm a killer. Shouldn't be allowed near a kid. Shouldn't be allowed near you."

She framed his face in her hands, pushing his hair back in the process, and forced him to look at her.

"Take it from someone who never curses, that is utter bullshit." she declared.

The word was so out of place in her mouth it almost brought a smile to his lips. It was gone before it even fully bloomed though.

"You don't know me, Effie." he snapped. "You don't know half the things I've done."

"But I know the things you are doing now." she argued. "I know you are a good parent to Katniss. I know you are a good friend. I know you are a good man."

"A good man who killed forty-eight kids." he sneered, escaping her hands to turn his back on her once more. "Get dressed and get out."

"Haymitch..." she breathed out.

"Out!" he shouted, banging his fist against the wall so loud he heard her gasp in fright.

His nerves were frayed and rattled. He stared at the wall until he was certain she had left the house, then he finished getting dressed, grabbed his keys and his wallet and headed to Ripper's bar. He was barely conscious of what he was doing. The memories were flashing on a loop in his mind, with the painful addition of Effie's bright blue eyes wide with panic as he squeezed her throat.

Ripper never asked questions and despite not having seen him in months, she served him the requested liquor, used to seeing him getting wasted at all times of day. He was deep into his bottle when he remembered Katniss.

He was in time to pick her up at school, even managing to show up five minutes early. Effie was already there. She took one look at him and pushed him back with a hand on his chest, her nose wrinkled in distaste.

The sight of the pink scarf neatly tied around her neck made him want to throw up.

"You are not in any state to take care of your niece." she declared. "Go home. Sober up. I will bring her home with me, you can pick her up later when you don't smell like a distillery. We will talk."

"I don't wanna talk to you." he slurred. "She's my kid you can't just decide I don't get to pick her up from school. You've got no rights."

"You will thank me later." she hissed. "Go home."

She was right, of course. And a part of him acknowledged that but he was angry, upset and drunk which was never a good combination.

"Think you can order me around, sweetheart?" he sneered. "Think 'cause I banged you a few times you're the boss of me now? You're not even that good..."

People were starting to give them weird glances and she pursed her lips, tilted her head on the side and shot him a glare that was clearly his last warning.

"Enough." she snapped. "Do whatever you wish but you are not going anywhere near Katniss in this state. She has been through a tragic accident, she should not have to go through a second."

"You're saying I'm going to hurt my own kid?" he scowled.

"I am done discussing this with you." she declared. "I am taking Katniss with me. You can pick her up when you are more yourself."

"So Peeta's not enough? You're going to try and steal my kid now?" he chuckled.

She took a step back, her face reflecting nothing but pain. Then, she shook her head and turned her back on him, walking closer to the school's gate to talk to the teacher in charge. She pointed at him with an extremely fake smile – he figured she was explaining she would be taking care of Katniss with his assent.

And, right now, that didn't seem like such a bad idea.

He didn't want to listen to the kid's prattle, he didn't want to play hunting, he didn't want to take her to the woods and he didn't want to sit down and watch Brave for the hundredth time.

He just wanted to drink until he couldn't think.

So he did just that.

He went back to Ripper's and he drank until he couldn't see straight.

His phone rang several times but he never picked up. It was always Effie's name flashing on the screen and he didn't want to talk to her. He didn't want to talk to anyone, really.

At some point, Ripper refused to give him any more and no amount of complaining, threatening or shouting made her comply. After half an hour of sitting on that stool sipping water, his mind started to clear enough for him to realize just how huge a mess he had just created for himself. There were twelve missed calls from Effie on his phone's screen, it was eleven at night, and he was too drunk to figure out what to do.

Ripper called Chaff.

He came to the bar in record time and the first thing he did was slap him on the back of the head with his stump. "What the fuck did you do?"

Haymitch pressed his hands against his face, not even minding the rough treatment.

"I fucked up." he muttered. "I fucked up."

"What do you mean you fucked up, man?" Chaff frowned. "Where's the girl? What happened?"

"With Effie." he mumbled. His friend obviously relaxed at that piece of news and signaled Ripper to bring more water. "Almost killed her."

"The kid?" Chaff stiffened.

He shook his head, pressing his fists against his eyes, wishing he could stop thinking about it, could stop seeing it. "Effie. Could have been Katniss. Had a nightmare and she tried to wake me and..."

"Should have explained the first rule to her." Chaff scowled. "You know better, Haymitch. You sleep with a woman regularly, you tell her the rules. If you have a bad one, she has to know to get away."

"I'm a fucking idiot thinking this could work." He shook his head. "Can't have Effie. Can't keep Katniss."

"You're being an idiot right now." his friend scorned. "Drink your water. What did you do? Hit her?"

"Strangled her." he admitted quietly. "Could have been Katniss..."

He tried to take a sip of the water but his hands were still shaking so badly he couldn't keep the glass straight.

"No." Chaff countered. "'Cause your kid's clever. She'd have gotten away. Now… How did she take it? She freaked out?"

He shook his head again. "She said she got it, that she wasn't mad."

"Then why are you being a bloody moron about this?" his friend sighed.

"She said I was a good man." he spat, slamming the glass down on the bar so hard water spilled everywhere. From the other end of the counter, Ripper shot him a dark look. "A good man. I'm not. I'm a fucking killer. I'm a fucking..." He shook his head. "Told her to get out, told her to... I showed up at school to get Katniss, she wouldn't let me near her. She's right, too. The kid deserves better. Maybe Effie can keep her. Maybe..."

"Do you hear yourself?" Chaff interrupted him. "How much did you have to drink?" Too much. He was wasted. On the slope down from complete drunkenness, yes, but nowhere near sober. "Why did she keep the kid away and why did you let her?"

"'Cause I was drunk." he muttered.

His friend's jaw was clenched and he shook his head in annoyance. "She did the right thing, then."

"She keeps calling." he slurred, shoving his phone in Chaff's hands. "Don't know what to tell her. I can't keep her. I can't..."

"Keep who? The woman or the kid? You're not making any sense." Chaff scoffed. "You need coffee."

Haymitch shook his head. "Need more booze."

"You're not getting any more booze." his friend snapped. "You're going to sober up enough to talk to that woman and we're going to get the girl back. I'll stay at your place tonight. The kid must be confused out of her mind. Forgot that she's scared of being abandoned, already?"

Chaff was angry with him, Haymitch mused through the haze of alcohol. That was a first.

"I'll hurt them." he argued. "I'm dangerous. Can't be near them. Can't..."

"It was an accident. It happens." Chaff said. "You move on."

"You don't get it." Haymitch sneered.

"I get that you have a chance at having a family." his friend retorted. "I get that you've got a shot at being happy, at leaving all that crap behind. I get that you're not going to toss all that away just 'cause it's easier to drown in a bottle than to face your fears. You've got a kid depending on you. You've got that woman who you couldn't stop smiling about yesterday. Stop being a coward and go get your life back."

Even with the liquor muddling his brain, Haymitch could see the reasoning behind that speech.

"She's going to hate me." he confessed. "I said bad things to her."

"Well, then you will have to grovel." Chaff decided. His phone started ringing again, her name flashing on the screen. His friend shot him one look, rolled his eyes and picked up. "No, love, it's Chaff. Yeah, he's alright. We'll be there in a few, when I'm sure he's in a state the girl can see him in."

He hung up and stared at him.

Haymitch could only hung his head in shame. Chaff never lectured him. Chaff was his best friend, his brother in arms and of choice. He couldn't quite bear to see the disappointment in his gaze.

"Come on." his friend said eventually. "Your girls are waiting."


You were betting on drama... you weren't wrong ;) What did you think? And what do you think is going to happen once Chaff gets him to Effie's house? Let me know what you think!