AN: Thank you all again for the reviews and also favoriting and following this little tale, it has been a great pleasure to know that these scribblings meet their audience. Enjoy the new chapter.
Day 3: Mind the man and his mind, mr. ninja
"...If I ever, I repeat, ever see or hear that healing bandage being used for something else than patching up your asses I swear I'll make that blond brat a Hokage before he could even blink just so that I could shove those comforters up into those bruised hineys so deep they'll make your throats itch. Do I make myself clear?" The very unwilling muttering ticked off the second last nerve from the owner of the glaring amber eyes as they narrowed further with a promise of a swiftly served knuckle sandwich with all extra toppings. "What?"
"Yes, Hokage-sama", came the sullen response.
Tsunade sighed heavily and rubbed her temples. Not that she hadn't expected them to damage either themselves or the house on the very first days, since it was the doom duo they were talking about, but never before had she wished so much to still be a detached kunoichi who had nothing to do with her village.
Then she could kill these two on the spot.
These two, who were dragged to the terrace from their futons by a firm hold on their ears the instant their leader had had a good glimpse of what seemed to be the remnants of an impromptu game of tag apparently modified with bits from hide and seek and dodge ball. Seeing the splintered remains of a small wooden box on the training room's floor and two neatly cut halves of a tea pot being embed into the ceiling, not to mention the condition of the healing bandage the ANBU had found from the flooded bathroom, was all the inspiration for her to give the sleeping shinobis a bit harsher wake-up call than she first had intended to.
Although she never had thought that the two of her finest shinobis could look so utterly miserable and adorable at the same time as both the silver and brown heads hung down in shame and the men hid further inside their comforters they had managed to hold on during the nasty awakening. Iruka had a big bruise on his temple which was half-covered by a hilariously tousled bush of brown hair sticking to all possible directions and another smaller one decorating his furiously blushing cheekbone, whereas Kakashi's lower part of the face may really need a mask if the two bruises on his forehead and a swollen masked cheek were anything to go by. The men were disgruntled, humiliated, ashamed and the red and slightly swollen right ears of both men that were still carrying the imprints of her fingers gave the grand finishing touch on the rather exquisite sight.
A sight which proved to be a bit too much for her at seven a.m.
The men gave wary glances towards their leader who leaned back as sudden loud guffaws shook her frame and furthermore provided the two men a rather disturbing view on how bouncy can two scantily covered mounds of flesh really be when given the right impulse. Iruka leaned carefully a bit closer to the other man and looked at Kakashi while his hands moved quickly and discreetly in the shinobi sign language.
She snapped. We should run.
If you think you can outrun a snapped sannin then you're in a way fitter condition than I have seen so far, sensei.
If I leave you as a sacrifice then I just might, bastard.
Maa, maa, that's not nice.
...Did you just sign 'maa, maa' to me?
Created them myself. Nifty, neh?
You've created a sign for it?!
As you apparently have refined your signs to withhold extra exclamation marks. Please don't ever teach Gai that. The constant thumb-upping is enough.
"What are you two signing so eagerly over there?" The half-annoyed voice made them both snap their hands back underneath the folds of their blankets, since there was no telling what Tsunade might do to them if she managed to catch their wrists, injured subordinates or not. They both valued their hands and fingers in order to continue in their profession. Not that it had stopped Kakashi from twisting Iruka's wrists couple of times in the middle of their game the previous evening, nor preventing Iruka from creating an impressive (and surprisingly painful) knot with the healing bandage on copy-nin's middle fingers before unleashing a freezing hell down the silver-haired man's neck.
Kakashi will never again flip off at the teacher without having either a thick wall of steel or Ibiki between them.
The ANBU who grunted from the work of patching up the damaged wall seemed to agree with him.
"Now then, the threats and scolding aside. I saw you two have given your samples and they're all in the fridge." Tsunade stood up and stepped over to Kakashi's other side and sat down. She peeled the comforter off the man and gave his form an examining look. "Did you follow the instructions? Do the seals work?"
"Yes, we followed the book, Tsunade-sama", Iruka answered while he looked curiously at their leader who poked tentatively one rather sizable bruise on the jounin's upper arm and was watching the masked face for any pained winces. Then she started to scan the ex-ANBU's body with her hands to see where to start the healing.
"The seals seem to work fine as well, Hokage-sama", Kakashi nodded, albeit a bit ticked from the poking. "At least neither of us has collapsed due to chakra depletion, eh, sensei?" He turned to give a small amused glance at his counterpart.
The ripe plum tone looked rather fetching on the man in the morning glow.
"..Indeed, Hatake-san", Iruka muttered and turned his narrowed eyes to look at the silently cursing ANBU who had finished his repair works on the training room's walls and doors and was currently trying to clean up the mess they've made. It seemed that those tea pot halves were quite efficiently stuck to the ceiling, and the tanned teacher was pretty sure that those weren't the correct hand seals for getting them down either.
Unfortunately, by turning his head he drew the attention of the amber eyes briefly to himself.
"...My, my. I knew you are at it like cats and dogs but to really use your claws and teeth, Kakashi-kun? I didn't know you fight so dirty when there's no chakra to rely on", Tsunade tutted as her eyes took a mischievous and lecherous glint in them. The instant when Kakashi's head snapped back to look at Iruka the teacher slammed his hand to cover the teeth marks as the fierce red blush took over his cheeks and the neck he had already forgotten to pay any attention to, since he was very tired and further mangled when they had hit the beds the previous night.
The feeling of the intensive gaze boring into his figure made an unexpected heat rise rapidly within the chuunin's body.
"...Maa, you know how feisty our sensei can be, Hokage-sama. He has impressive fangs when one gets him to show them, you know", Kakashi drawled in amused manner, the man being obviously far too eager to attend his own funeral.
The burning look he received by the even more so narrowed dark eyes did wonders to one's self-preservation instincts and after a fleeting moment Kakashi realized he had unconsciously tucked his nether regions under the much thicker folds of his blanket. Good that Tsunade was there to heal them, he might then be only half-dead after the passionate sensei was through with him.
"...I'll make some tea and coffee, Hokage-sama", the irritated teacher said calmly and then stood up and out from beneath his comforter before limping to the kitchen with all the dignity his flaring temper could pull together for it while his hand was still firmly clutching the patch of skin on his red neck.
Tsunade gave a soft snort and Kakashi felt her to start healing his right shoulder blade. "How are you doing with him beside pissing him off constantly?"
"Maa, that we do quite equally, you know. That man is evil."
"He's also a highly needed shinobi, who you're not allowed to break."
"Well he seems quite eager to do that to me, with all due respect. He stole my books again yesterday, so basically I was more than entitled to take them back by force, thus I'm not the one at fault here", Kakashi huffed and for the second Tsunade wondered if that was indeed a whine she heard. Then an amused chuckle found its way to the woman's lips.
"I thought there wouldn't be anything left in you to get broken, brat."
"Hey! That's harsh, Hokage-sama", Kakashi could feel an indignant flush appear on his thankfully masked cheeks. He may act like an overly professional and unhealthily cold and detached know-it-all asshole or an all-around-pervert frequently when accompanying certain people, moreover a certain anal firecracker, but that didn't mean he was all foreign to friendly treatment.
The barely swallowed snort from the training room spoke volumes.
"I still need him so keep that killing intent at bay", Tsunade's sharp order snapped Kakashi out of his sudden homicidal urges and instead of disemboweling some black-ops and serving the dish out of the irritating porcelain mask he slowly turned to look at the firm hand holding his right arm in place and then at his body that was healed for the most part. He felt his ribs and shoulders and turned his head from one side to other, noting that it didn't hurt as much anymore.
"Huh. Thank you, Tsunade-sama. Though why not heal all the injuries?" He asked as he took note on all the places that still hurt considerately. That fourth vertebra on his spine really liked to remind him of his past missions.
"That would defeat the goal of this mission. That's why", Tsunade sat a bit away from him on his other side and folded Iruka's comforter in order to sit on it. Kakashi had a fleeting thought that the temperamental sensei may have an opinion or two about people who sit on his property without asking first, even if he used it only temporarily, but decided to see what the day had yet to offer. Plus being a killjoy was also acting against the well-known unwritten protocol of Konoha jounin, and Kakashi wasn't one to violate the sacred packs.
Tsunade gave a brief look at the backyard and the fence surrounding it, the wooden wall casting a long shadow towards the house in the slowly brightening morning light. "If I would heal all your wounds then your bodies would be deceived to think that you could continue like you used to. It's important for this mission to really train both your body and mind in order to honestly see if you slowly develop new fighting styles or improve yourselves otherwise on some levels. Biting someone's neck may not be the most civil and smoothest way to start doing it, but as long as you two stay alive I'll just let you do what you want." Kakashi didn't like that hidden layer of amusement in the woman's voice. Clearly that wasn't all she had wanted to say and he as sure as hell wasn't feeling suicidal enough to ask about it as he heard the faint footsteps approach from the direction of their kitchen.
"Here you go, tea for two and coffee for the canine." Iruka set the small tray between himself and the other two. As Iruka eased himself down on the wooden floor, Kakashi noticed the teacher had gone and healed his gnawed neck on his own. No wonder it took him time to make the drinks. The moment when Iruka noticed Tsunade sitting on his blanket Kakashi saw a rapidly forming scowl on the tan face which just as quickly faded back into a calm-looking mask. Apparently the teacher was good at hiding his thoughts when he chose to, as well as the jounin who chose to be completely aloof in social situations when it suited him best. After all the months of more or less ambivalently forming camaraderie the men still seemed to offer surprises to one another. No wonder the jounin still loitered around the academy teacher, and Kakashi had to admit that the chuunin may have filled a hollow spot or two with his fiery presence. Which was something he'll never even imply to the well-known tyrant of the mission room, even though the blushes that the thought action may cause would make up for getting punched through the nearest wall, window or desk. Or all of them if the floor planning fit the moment. The smooth voice caught his attention and Kakashi turned his eye from the fence wall to the other two persons sitting with him in the morning light.
"I do have a few questions concerning this mission, though. Why do we actually need to take the blood samples, Tsunade-sama? I thought it was the use of chakra and our fighting we were supposed to monitor, not our metabolism." Iruka ever so smoothly offered Kakashi his coffee while at the same time his other hand discreetly turned the small tray just so that Tsunade couldn't detect any foul play as she concentrated on the teacher's words. Kakashi, however, took his time to find the reason for the odd gesture, and noted that the other cup's tea was just a hint more yellow than springy green. So the man had misbrewed the other cup which he had intended first to drink himself. For the ones not knowing any better it wouldn't have been such a big deal, but Kakashi had learned that on Iruka's scale offering badly brewed tea was equivalent of announcing a war, and the copy-nin had to inhale his coffee's aromas fervently for a second to push away the bubbling chortle that was trying very hard to push through his nose and mouth.
If he ever needed an expert on subtle warfare tactics he knew where to look.
Tsunade took the tea Iruka offered her and gave it a long sniff with a satisfied sigh. Kakashi amused himself by watching how the dark, slender brow rose ever so lightly on the otherwise unreadable face before the chuunin busied himself with his own cup while casting a brief, dark and efficiently silencing look over the porcelain edge at the lightning user sitting across him. Kakashi gave a soft hum and winked happily at the glaring man. That chuunin really seemed to have more than five senses in him.
"It actually does concern your metabolism, Iruka-sensei." Tsunade's musing words snatched their attention and they turned to look at the surprisingly concentrated-looking Hokage. She took a small sip on her tea and swirled the liquid in the small cup. "Since there's only one record I found on this training method it isn't said that it wouldn't have nasty side effects on shinobi who try it. I know you two have been using a similar method before this, but it has always lasted only for a few hours, as this on the other hand will last for the whole month. I need to be able to detect all possible threats there might be for your metabolism and hormonal functions in order to stop this experiment from backfiring badly if it ever should come to that. That's why I have to keep an eye on you."
"What side effects would you mean, Tsunade-sama?" Iruka's eyebrows rose slightly at the woman's words, he had never even considered that their training seals could still do some damage after he so carefully created them to suite the methods they used. Had he still missed some crucial details on them?
"Basically everything at this point. That's why it's also good that you two have been training together before, since I need you to also monitor one another beside yourselves. If the other shows any signs of something being wrong, contact either me or Shizune immediately. The ANBU have been informed about this mission so they also have a direct communication channel to you if you can't reach anybody else. You will not delay contacting me, no matter how insignificant the symptom is, do you understand me, brat?" With that Tsunade gave Kakashi a very strict look.
Kakashi frowned behind his coffee and then turned to stare flatly at the sniggering sensei who desperately tried to hide his grin behind his tea cup. "Exactly why do you specify that order at me only?"
Tsunade gave him the flattest look she usually had reserved for only two other shinobis who were both currently away from the village. "Since you have the pride bigger than your dick and brain combined."
After that it was no use for Iruka to hold his laughter in any longer.
"Take these to the examination room and tell Shizune that I'll join them shortly", Tsunade said with a smile and gave the ANBU the sample box after the nin had finally finished patching up the training house and refilling the kitchen cupboards and fridge with food. The ANBU nodded at her and with a small salute he vanished. Tsunade turned to look at the double trouble who were watching her by the front door, both in seemingly better shape than in the early morning after being healed for the most parts.
"Is there something else on your minds that you'd want to discuss before I leave?" She looked at the book that had appeared in Iruka's hands and then the hesitant looks she received. Her lips tilted into a small smile. "You tried to open the seals in the book, didn't you, Iruka-kun?"
"Ah, well..when you put it that way, Hokage-sama..." Iruka ducked his head and scratched at his scar with a sheepish smile. "I just noticed that there was something strange about it and, well, may have spent a moment or two figuring it out." The silent snicker behind his back turned into a pained hiss as his heel found the silver-bastard's toes. Jounin and their infamous reflexes his tanned ass, even Udon could have dodged from that assault point.
"I suggest that you won't worry yourselves with those seals, they're thoughtfully designed to meet your needs when the correct moment comes. Just follow its instructions and try to remember performing the stretches, your shoulders were stiffer than they should be. If you can do taijutsu then you should be able to manhandle each other as well without trying to kill the other all the time. And for kami's sake mind the house, otherwise I'll have you both sleep in a very, very crammed tent for the rest of the month." She could feel her lips stretch into a playful smirk at the scandalized looks on the two men. It seemed that the brat had still vivid memories of his mission with Asuma a few months ago, since she could think no other explanation for the haunted look in the usually arrogant one eye. Shinobi or not, they were still like kids when it came to the basics of reward and punishment. Something to remember in days to come.
"Yes, Hokage-sama", came the hasty mutual response.
"Good. Let me know whenever there's anything troubling you. You know where to find me." With that she turned and waved casually before exiting the front gate of the house, leaving the pair of shinobi stand by the door in thoughtful silence. After a moment it was Kakashi to turn his eye to the darker man next to him who was once again examining the small book.
"Iruka-sensei?"
"Hmm?"
"You do realize that we've just had an audience with the Hokage while wearing nothing else than sweaty, torn tank tops and dirty boxers?"
The dark eyes cast a brief look at their demeanor.
"...Get the bells ready, Kakashi-san."
They observed each other from across the training room. The dark eyes eyed the pale frame for a moment before Iruka leaned down and dashed to the side before rounding the older man in hopes for reaching his goal before the man caught up with his plan. Kakashi smirked under his mask and danced away from the snatching hands, keeping his glinting prize safely away from those wicked fingers. Then the older man stopped, took Iruka's hand, spun around and threw the teacher over his shoulder. Iruka grunted on the hard impact with the tatami mat and jerked his hand away from the other's hold only to be pinned to the floor by two knees slamming on his shoulders. Kakashi smiled from above and gracefully leaned over the teacher's body in order to take what was his.
Iruka growled and used the sudden change of his position for his advantage as he suddenly pulled his legs over his stomach and plunged them against Kakashi's chest. The copy-nin managed to lessen their impact by putting his hands between on time but the unorthodox kick was still efficient enough and sent him falling on his side. Iruka freed himself from underneath the older man and scrambled on his knees before the awaited fist came sailing through the air towards him. The teacher managed to take a hold on the hand and block the other as well, and once again the men found themselves immersing in a staring competition.
After a while Iruka realized that the inventive prick had slowly added his body weight on him and was leaning quite heavily against his hold. His arms were already trembling under the added weight and the teacher could see the smug, victorious glint in that gray eye. In one swift movement Kakashi pushed his body forward while yanking his hands free and reversing their hold as he all but forced the hastily retreating chuunin beneath him on the floor, pinning the man once again with his one hand and putting him into a rather agonizing position with the tanned legs bent under the lean body. He snatched the bell and gave the panting teacher a smirk.
"Gotcha, sensei."
The eye-roll was all he got for his troubles.
"Want some asparagus to go with the fish?"
"Sure", Kakashi said and took the offered greens in order to prepare them to be boiled. Iruka took a taste of the glazing before he offered the other man a spoonful as well and shifted his eyes to look elsewhere while the silver-haired man tasted the flavor.
"I never would've thought that ANBU delivered groceries as well", the tanned man chuckled at the memory of the slightly awkward-looking elite stocking up their kitchen.
"You'd be surprised, sensei. ANBU doesn't flinch when it comes to mundane tasks. I've even done a hefty amount of D-ranks myself back when I was younger." Kakashi smiled a little at those memories, although being a little pain in the ass for his peers was also one reason why he ended up with lots of tasks involving old ladies and babysitting the nobles' children in times without assassinations or other dangerous missions. But then again, he learned many new skills from those bland missions, such as how to peel and chop vegetables. Furthermore without a kunai. That was an embarrassing incident for a ten-year-old and the man rubbed briefly his right thumb as the long forgotten and already vanished wound spot itched irritably.
"Really?" Iruka looked at Kakashi with renewed, albeit not so innocent, curiosity. "You really managed to bend that stiff neck of yours for those jobs?" Iruka knew the man had done quite a lot for his village ever since the destined child prodigy became a genin, but the combination of mundane and Kakashi weren't exactly the first thought factors in any equations within the boundaries of the Fire Country, and he was quite sure it applied with the rest of the countries as well. The Bingo Book would never be the same if it ever came down to that, and the chuunin couldn't resist a snicker or two for his spontaneous hypothesis of what it would actually read in the notorious book if all the S-class secrets came open, and in his mind seeing the book with an image of the infamous copy-nin wearing a white apron with paw prints didn't do much to lessen the hilarity of his current thoughts.
"For your information, 'The pain of thousand years' has other variations too", came the calm notification and the teacher knew when to re-check one's safety measures. Thus he also knew perfectly well when to go down all the way.
"Then how would you like the rice this time, wifey?"
"Alright, good...can you make it bend just a bit more?"
He assumed the grunt was the meant reply to him. He took a firmer hold both onto the tan shoulder with his hand and on the tan arm with the other and bent the arm back as slowly as he could while he observed Iruka as the tanned man tried to stay put. The sounds of noon echoed over the fence and circled the silent pair who stood in the backyard, the empty plates and glasses forgotten on the terrace.
Kakashi gave a small squeeze on the slightly tensing shoulder and Iruka nodded amidst his deep breathing. He felt the muscles twitch and then settle again under his hand and the silver-haired man nodded to himself before bending the arm further back. A quiet hiss escaped his counterpart's lips and they stood still for a moment before Kakashi slowly brought the arm back to Iruka's side and took a hold on the other shoulder and the quietly offered arm.
"Ready, sensei?"
"I wonder how long it'll actually take for our bodies to adjust in this situation", Iruka thought aloud while putting the washed dishes back into the cupboards.
"I'd guess it'll happen either tomorrow or the day after. Although we're trained shinobi so basically it should happen even today, but I dare to doubt it since yesterday the muscles were in bad shape and we still ended up pushing them too far", Kakashi answered by the terrace door and held the silver bells in his hand. The gray eye scanned the hustling figure that moved in their kitchen and Kakashi was quite pleased to note that Iruka was in higher spirits than the previous day. Even though he wasn't sure if that was such a good thing, since during their acquaintance he had learned the warning signs of a beaming Umino as well the more or less safe distances that needed to be taken then if one wanted to have all their appendages still attached on their bodies.
Iruka wiped his hands clean and then stepped to take the bell from the other man before they went to the training room. They attached the bells on their sweatpants and stretched their backs and legs curtly. As Kakashi finished his stretches Iruka had already set the timer and the dark brown eyes were gazing him keenly. The ex-ANBU gave a nod and made the first move.
In an instant Kakashi was over the younger man, chasing him around the room as he made attempts on the bell. They both knew the first few minutes were plainly just for warming up but that didn't stop them from having fun all the way. Iruka slapped the quick hands away, stood abruptly in front of Kakashi, nose to nose, and blew a small puff of air into his masked face before aiming a hit at the man's stomach with his accurate fist. Kakashi blocked the fist with his hands and Iruka pulled away from him before he surged again at him, the tanned man obviously going for Kakashi's blind spot. Kakashi spun around and sent the teacher staggering past him, then took hold of one arm, yanked the teacher back and threw him over his shoulder once again. Iruka recovered quickly amidst his travel over the pale body, twisted his own body into the right angle and landed gracefully on his feet. The chuunin then nimbly reversed their grips joining their hands and pulled the older nin down as he used the man as a leverage to pull himself up. Kakashi resisted the strong pull as well as he could and yanked his hand away as soon as the teacher had stood back up before the man would use their joined hands further against him. Iruka instantly made several sharp jabs at Kakashi's bell, the concentration burning in his dark brown eyes for Kakashi's delighted note, and the older man was more than thrilled to give the other a good challenge. He blocked, attacked and chased the younger shinobi, all the while keeping an eye on the other. After last night's conversation he felt a bit confused, to be completely honest, since he couldn't understand Iruka's train of thought. Why would anybody approach someone they were afraid of? What was in Kakashi that Iruka was afraid of?
"You're spacing out, Kakashi-san. Should we stop for a moment?" The slightly worried, smooth voice snapped his thoughts back to the present and he realized that Iruka had taken him into an impressive hold from behind his back, keeping a firm grip on the pale hands crossed over Kakashi's stomach on the dark gray sleeveless singlet. The man hadn't touched the silver bell just inches away from his fingers, though. Pays off to play with a teacher; dirty tricks weren't allowed if the counterpart hadn't been fully present in the situation. Kakashi turned his head in order to give a reassuring wink at the chuunin over his shoulder.
"Maa, you're just taking so long that I decided to take a nap. Miscounted the morning tea dose for being so sluggish, sensei?"
That man sure could sizzle. Iruka snarled, tightened his grip all around the man and for a moment Kakashi could count his ribs with each passing second as they wailed under the iron hold. The jounin struggled and wriggled against the hold while he tried to keep his lower body safely away from those again active fingers reaching for the red thread. Suddenly he noticed being roughly manhandled against a wall with a loud thump, accompanied by a slightly amusing feeling of déjà vu, and he felt Iruka let go of his other hand while the chuunin pressed his body heavily against the older man in obvious hopes for keeping the bastard still enough to get the bell from him.
A fatal mistake.
Kakashi took hold of the reaching hand, stepped promptly on Iruka's foot and with the sliver of space created by his actions between him and the wall, he pulled his other hand up against the wall and all but pushed them away from it. Then he spun around on his heels while he twisted the captured hand behind Iruka's back as the other man suddenly found himself being pulled around and then forced against the same wall face first. Iruka's free hand succeeded to cover his precious bell before the pale fingers could lay themselves on it, and the men stilled for a moment, both panting and sweating due to the day's activities.
"How do you enjoy the architecture, sensei?" Kakashi mused next to a tanned ear.
"Fuuff off, Kakshhsaff."
"Maa, didn't quite catch that. Care to repeat?" A low, dangerous mixture of growling and muffled cursing reached his perked ears. Interesting. "This would be a good time to wash that dirty mouth of yours. Shame that I can't do any jutsus now. But-", he leaned closer to the struggling man, "you've already made a bad mistake by letting me get behind your back so easily. Way too easily, in fact." He pressed his body further against his captive, pressed his thighs against the other set and felt the hands between their bodies squeeze further against the chuunin's back and his abdomen and the hands against the wall having more pressure on them while his brain worked on wondering what the other had in mind after getting caught so effortlessly. They had still ten minutes left, which was puzzling for Kakashi since usually the chuunin had lasted way longer than now. It was too easy.
Kakashi knew better to dislike things being too easy.
He ducked his head closer to the other's neck and for a second his eyes gazed over the tanned skin that just a few hours ago had his teeth marks on it. "What are you up to, sensei?" He wondered half-aloud, feeling something stir in his gut.
The thick silence that suddenly hung on them wasn't helping at all.
"...Saa, is getting lost in the road of life so bad, Kakashi-san?" Iruka had slowly managed to dislodge his mouth from the ill-tasting wall, and Kakashi frowned on the foreign tone of the usually mellow voice. Then he caught the cunning look in the chuunin's eyes and knew that he really did know better.
That little minx was playing time.
Iruka smirked, pushed his hips forcefully against Kakashi's other hand still trapped between the chuunin and the wall as his captured hand behind his back had subtly weaved its way towards the price on Kakashi's hips when the older man hadn't payed enough attention to it. The red thread snapped off as Kakashi jerked his hand from around the teacher and thus moved his body sharply in the process before he realized what had happened. The chuunin turned around with his one hand still caught in the jounin's grip and leaned his back against the wall with a smug smirk on his lips as the small silver bell dangled from his fingers in his hand that was held between them. His victory didn't last long, though, and the smirk fell as the teacher started to realize there to be an empty space beneath his hand that was still clutched on his hip.
Kakashi raised his hand and gave him a wide smirk as the lost bell emerged from his closed fist and dangled in the air in a mockingly same style as chuunin held his bell. The deep, annoyed blush was well worth the stunt.
Iruka rolled his eyes at the annoying genius but couldn't help as a bit wider smile found its way on his lips. He sighed and dropped the bell to his opponent's waiting hand before straightening up and dislodging his hand from the pale one.
"Care for a short break, Kakashi-san? I could kill for a tea now."
Kakashi heard himself chuckle smoothly at the chosen words. "Best to give you that tea then, sensei."
"Wise decision", the teacher grinned and strolled to the kitchen, leaving one pensive jounin alone in the silent training room.
Iruka pulled the needle out and put the full vial back into the small new sample box they were given before Tsunade left that morning. Then he took the box back into the fridge and as he came back he saw Kakashi attach the sleeve back to his jacket. The chuunin sat down next to the jounin and the sounds of early evening wafted in the air while the empty dishes of the eaten dinner were on a small tray some feet away waiting to be washed as the jounin settled happily to read his daily fix of adult literature and the teacher worked on the seals of the small notebook.
"You'll never get those seals open, you know", an amused voice teased behind the porn.
"Care to make a bet on that, Kakashi-san?"
"Hmm?"
"If I manage to get them open, you'll do something for me. How does that sound?" Iruka turned to give a challenging look at the man laying next to him. The thin travel porn book was lowered and a curious one-eyed look was cast to his direction.
"And what if you lose?"
He hadn't thought of that. The teacher tapped his chin with the book and for a few minutes considered the pros and cons of actually forming a bet with the superior nin. The wages should be equal, so that it would indeed benefit the winner but also it shouldn't be too much for the loser. He raised a brow and gave a small smile at the man next to him. "Is the same deal good for you as well?"
"You mean you doing something for me when I win?"
"In case you win, asshole. Are you in or not?"
The older man hummed in thought for a minute and looked at his porn book with considering air around him, and in that moment the teacher realized that it would have been wise to elaborate on the conditions of the bet. Iruka gave a better look at the older man and his perverted book, and to his surprise for the shortest second he found himself questioning the need to elaborate anything concerning what the other might suggest if he won. The small notebook felt suddenly heavier in his hands and for some reason his cheeks felt as hot as they did when he healed his neck that morning. Before he knew it, his hand touched the patch of once bitten skin and not for the first time the teacher had to wonder if his teas really were meddled with by someone.
Kakashi looked over at the peculiarly silent man and the silver brows frowned at the troubled look on the chuunin's face. Maybe the teacher was scared that he'd ask something scandalous from him should he win their bet. The passing thought seemed to trigger a synapse or two in his brain and without a second thought the jounin rose slowly to sit up as his muscles felt suddenly very restless and unwilling to keep under his brain's command. Iruka stirred slightly as the man apparently sensed his presence near him and the tension that had once vanished between them was back in an instant.
In a blink of an eye one particularly loud cry about Spring and Youth cut through the air, shattering the strange ambiance that had fallen on them once again as they both fell immobile and silent as the dead while they waited with baited breaths for the imminent appearance of the person they hadn't missed a day after starting the mission. After a moment they glanced at each other in shocked awe as the demon in garish green against all odds seemed to have moved away to a safe distance from the fence and they released the breaths they had held on reflex. Then the breaths turned into chuckles, then into an outright laughter, and thus they were both quite happy about the fact that they couldn't be heard nor seen from the street at that particular moment as they both gasped for air desperately and fell on their backs on the hard wood of the terrace.
"That..now, that..was..!" Kakashi panted and tried to grasp on the words escaping his hysteric mind. Not that the very red-faced chuunin was any helpful on that matter.
"That, that...oh, kami, I love you, Hokage-sama! Thank you!" Iruka shouted in the air and gave a mighty whoop with an enthusiastic fist pump, reminding the jounin about the blonde genin who was currently traveling somewhere with a perverted toad and whose reaction to ramen was remarkably similar as the tanned sensei's just then. Kakashi lifted his hand amidst his panting and Iruka gave him a high-five while they both grinned like maniacs.
Never had they thought it possible to have a month with no stress of constantly failing to outrun the all too loud green man with a serious neuroses for thumbs, challenges and shiny teeth.
"So, are you game then, sensei?"
Iruka looked at the shadow of the other man on the wall and raised a brow. "Am I game?"
"You know, the bet you wanted us to take", Kakashi shrugged and folded the pants on his bed before tying the towel around his waist in order to remove his boxers. Not that he was a prude, or anything even close to that word, but for some vain reason he actually preferred not to let the tanned pain in his pale ass see his current boxer briefs with tiny shurikens on them.
The resulting teasing would be endless.
"Oh, that. Well, do you accept the wages?" Iruka asked and took off his hair band before stepping to the corridor while wearing only his towel. The older man was already wearing his shower mask as he stepped to the corridor as well and followed the teacher to the bathroom.
"Why not, it does sound interesting enough. Besides, you have the whole month to work on the book, or at least until the last one pops, so we even have a proper time limit for it. Plus it'll give me more time to read my books in peace when you struggle with them instead of commenting on my reading material all the time", the jounin mused while they took off their towels and headed for the shower stalls with the stained glass wall between them.
Iruka snorted and rolled his eyes as he turned the faucets. "If you think a few seals will keep this chuunin's mouth shut about your dirty books then you have another thing coming, jounin-san."
"Then I'll just have to use one of those seals to shut you up, don't I, sensei?" Came the equally sly answer from the other side of the glass wall. "Maybe just taping the book against that eager mouth would do the trick, since the wall seemed to work well enough."
"Speaking of which, I hope the ANBU really knew how to patch up a wall since the plaster tasted very weird. Pass the shampoo, will you?" Iruka reached his hand to the other side and got the asked bottle. He took the amount of shampoo he needed and passed the bottle back on the other's side before scrubbing his scalp vigorously and thoroughly. He liked his hair as it was but it was a pain to wash and sort out whenever it chose to tangle into a mess while sparring.
"For some reason I doubt that any ANBU would be twisted enough to try to poison an academy teacher with wall putty. Although...nope, it would be just me if anybody tried that on you", Kakashi chuckled happily as he washed the slightly dried sweat away from his body. Being mostly on missions that required keeping still in a forest, desert or the mountains in every available crook there was to be used made the simple joys like taking a shower feel like divine luxury for the sharingan user. Having a clean body was pure bliss.
"I'll keep that in mind the next time I ask for renovation help, might be even wise to give Genma a taste on all the paints and caulks before using them, just to be on the safe side", Iruka smirked widely on his side and gave a sideway glance at the chuckling dark figure behind the glass wall before rinsing himself off and stepping out of the shower. A faint popping sound reached his ears and they both stilled on reflex for a moment. They both knew that sound and knew the implications connected to it as well. Iruka quickly tied the towel he had grabbed on his waist and strode to their bedroom heading straight to the small notebook that had flopped open on his futon. Of all the things that had been circling in his mind as the possible next task from the book, the tiny object now laying on his linen was beyond his most twisted sense of humor, and that was a lot from a man who was well-acquainted with the craziest nins of the hidden village.
"...Maa. That's..Well", said the slightly confused, low voice behind the teacher by the bedroom doors as he leaned over his bed.
"...You can say that again", Iruka muttered and took the small bottle in his hand to carefully read the label on it while the nauseating feeling of dread settled at the bottom of his stomach.
She had sent them massage oil.
After dressing up, the men had settled in the kitchen to eat their evening snack before hitting the bed. After last night they didn't feel like staying up so long and after a small discussion they deemed their training clothes being so close to be used as chemical warfare that washing them was necessary for the sake of their mission and preserving their sense of smell. So there they stood, both dressed in their dark uniform pants and loose shirts, eating fish sandwiches and drinking their hot drinks while the laundry machine thrummed peacefully beneath the kitchen counter.
All of their thoughts being focused on that damned little bottle placed on a shelf mere twenty feet away behind the bathroom doors.
Kakashi munched on the bite that had been lolling in his mouth for a while now and took a brief look at the bristled man leaning against the counter a couple of feet away and who was seemingly killing his sandwich with every bite before swallowing heavily.
"Maa-"
"Absolutely no."
"Well-"
"I will not, in any circumstances, put some scented body oil on my fellow shinobi and give them a naked full-body rub, Kakashi-san. Especially when the current company is concerned." And with that the copy-nin received a severely pointed look served with a fiery red tinge blooming on the scarred tanned cheeks.
"Maa, what makes you think so badly of me, sensei? Have I ever done something-" Kakashi had never considered the possibility to be so quickly cut off in the middle of the sentence. That look was sharper than any blade swung at his direction during his active career.
"I wonder", came the ominous words from the dark lips and the scowling sensei took a sip from his tea, settling with an even darker look towards the small book that could be seen from the open door to their bedroom. "...Would she notice if-"
"She could always check the amount of the oil, sensei."
"But if we'd pour it slowly down the drain."
"I bet that it's chakra-infused. If that's the case then beside being highly effective when used for a massage, it'll also be easier to track in the drain pipes should you pour it down the kitchen sink or in the toilet. Bathroom would be efficient for fooling her, true, but she, with no doubt, has measured the correct usage of the oil per session so pouring too much or too little at once would be suspicious, plus usually it can be smelled or felt in some oils that it has been in contact with skin." As he reasoned further, Kakashi could feel the dark eyes intensify their look on him on each passing second, making it harder to keep his logic straight under the hard scrutiny that has obviously been cultivated to its peak during the years of the tanned man's teaching job. The jounin warily turned his gray eye to look at the pair of dark orbs examining him keenly and he felt a nervous smile stretch on his lips. Being an ex-ANBU wasn't a certified get-away card when Iruka was concerned, since the sensei had a very strict sense of serving equally ruthless punishments whenever someone pissed him off, no matter what rank they represented.
"...You really want to have a full-body rub, don't you, pervert."
"A man has his needs."
The sandwich was illegally fast in his opinion.
