* - Is a warning for possible triggers.

He hasn't said anything yet, just keeps sending her disgusted glances and clenching and unclenching his fists. Sammy has left the house, saying he needed to get something. Probably to get away from Alvarr. The coward inside her wants to run away, too.

But cowardice was for the old Morgana. She was the new Morgana now. The strong, bold one, who didn't need anyone, could face this. Alvarr was nothing special and she wasn't scared of him. He couldn't hurt her now. She had some kind of immunity that the old version of herself hadn't had. She'd been fully upgraded.

"Say something then," she snaps in a crueller tone the she'd intended and he whips his head around to look at her. He doesn't even look that angry. Yet.

She knew he would be soon and this was just his way of building up to it. The deceitful calm before the storm. A raging storm that could knock her for six if she was caught off guard. But she was most definitely keeping her guard up. Mentally putting up a wall between him and her. Hunith said that could help in situations like this. Imagining an invisible bubble that nothing could get through.

"What do you want me to say?" If she didn't know him better, she might be convinced into thinking that he really was okay with all of this.

"How you feel."

"Maybe it's best that I don't put how I feel into words."

"Well, then, how about-"

"I don't think I should put it into something physical either," he says wearily and sits down next to her. Morgana edges ever so slightly away from him.

"Okay. So, what emotions are you feeling?" She asks, cautiously this time. "Like... angry, upset, etcetera."

He turns to her with what looks like a smile. A genuine one. She couldn't remember the last time she'd seen him do that. Not smirking or rolling his eyes. This was probably all part of the façade.

"How could I possibly be angry? Not when we've created something in here," he rests a hand on her flat stomach. A cool one. Rigid. Not warm and comforting. Not like Merlin. No-one was like Merlin. Not to her. "So, how many months are you?"

Shit. He still thought she had it. "I'm not actually pregnant any more," she says in a loud whisper. She hated telling people this, watching their faces fall and listening to the 'it's okay Morgana. You probably just weren't ready' speech.

"Did you get rid of it?"

He sounds so insecure now. As if he'd been the weaker one in the relationship all along. Perhaps he was trying to make her think that. Hunith said that could happen, the man could make the woman feel as if it was their fault, like they were the ones that were doing the abusing.

"No. Even if I wanted to, I don't think I'd be able to do it. It never really appeared as an option to me," she says truthfully. The new Morgana always told the truth because she had her own opinions and she didn't care what other people thought of them.

"Why?"

"It's still a life, I suppose. No matter who has helped create it."

"Hm. Did you lose it then? Is that why you were in the hospital?" He waits, surprisingly enough, for her nod of confirmation to continue. "Didn't it hurt?"

"Yes. A lot," she replies curtly.

"And did it upset you?"

"Like I said, it was a loss of life."

"You don't seem overly bothered," he points out, a bit petulantly. "So, do you know why you lost it?"

"Something about the egg not being able to attach to the wall of the womb properly and it got flushed away. I don't know, I wasn't really listening," she says vaguely, not going into much detail on the matter. "They said it was a fairly common way to-"

She stops mid-sentence and stiffens like a statue because he pulls her into an embrace. Alvarr wasn't very good at hugs. It was very... awkward. Not very comforting at all. Not that she needed comforting.

She pulls away from his attempt at affection, straightens her back and stretches her legs, looking at the three years worth of wear red converses on her feet.

She clears her throat and says, "Anyway. I didn't come here for sympathy and I'm sorry that you had to find out about... everything like this, I came here to find out about this letter."

He holds his hands up in surrender. "Whoa, Morgana. I've just found out that I had a child, with you, and that I've lost it in under 5 minutes, give me a break will you? I just want to think about this for a minute," he says in a strangely calm voice. Usually he'd have given her at least a warning by now. She'd asked him too many personal questions and gone off topic too quickly, he would've shouted at her and stormed off to go and get drunk, or whatever it was he did. And here they were having as close to a normal conversation as they could get.

"Sorry," she apologizes. "I shouldn't have moved on so quickly."

"Yes, well you always were very flighty. Wanted something to run away to if life got too hard on you. Is that what Merlin is? An escape route?" He snarls at her, the once calm atmosphere snapping in two to reveal a much harsher one that she was used to.

"It's not like that. I love him," she tells him, trying to get the words to stick in his mind and failing hopelessly.

"Love?" He laughs at the word and leans back on the sofa. "I don't know what it is you two have together, but it definitely isn't love."

"It is love. Not that you'd know anything about it," she retorts.

"And how long have you known him? Two weeks? A month?"

"That's none of your concern," she snaps back. She was in love with Merlin. Is in love, or whatever. Alvarr was just playing mind games. Planting a seed of doubt in her mind. She hoped it didn't grow.

"Of course, of course. Whatever you say, Morgana. So, have you fucked yet?" Alvarr asks, feigning disinterest.

"I would rather you didn't use that term to describe it."

"Aw, how sweet of you. What is it then? Shagging, sex... making love?" He says the last two words in a girlish voice, batting his eyelashes at her. "Get out of it Morgana and stop kidding yourself."

She scowls at her hands in her lap and then smirks. "Better than you," she says, deliberately quiet.

"Something you'd like to say?"

"He's better than you. One night with Merlin is better than a year with you."

He frowns. "So you've only done it once, then?"

"Yes, well, the miscarriage got in the way." She could regret these words later, now she just wanted to make Alvarr jealous. "If it hadn't and I hadn't been pregnant with you, then I might be with Merlin now. I could've had his child in my belly by now. How wonderful," she continues in a dreamy tone.

"What do you see in him?"

"Everything I didn't have with you. He's everything I want." Maybe she was taking this a bit too far. "Jealous?"

"Extremely. He's got everything I want. Everything I care about, he's just gone and stolen it from me," he says slowly, putting emphasis into his words. Making her listen to him.

"Like what?"

"You. He's taken you from-"

"You never cared for me. You didn't look after me like Merlin does now," she cuts in angrily and he glares at her.

"How dare you interrupt me?" He goes into and stands up and she does the same. She wants to argue with him, to settle everything out once and for all, but he pushes her back down again and grins wickedly. "You're scared of me, aren't you?"

"Do you want me to be?"

"I guess so. I've always wanted control," he muses, flexing his fingers and then clicking the joints. Then her phone vibrates in her pocket making the only noise in the room right now. "Who's that?"

"I don't know."

"Look at your phone then," he orders and she does so, frowning at the screen.

"It's Hunith. Merlin's mum."

"Answer it, then."

"But... what should I say?"

"Tell her you're okay. You'll be home soon."

She nods and brings the phone up to her ear. "Hello."

"Morgana, sweetie, where are you? You've been gone for ages now, I've been worried sick."

"I'm... with Alvarr, at his house. Can you, um, can you come and pick me up please? I don't feel well."

"Yes, but where are you? Look, I'll disconnect and then you can text me the details okay?"

"Yeah, okay," Morgana breathes down the line and then sends the address.

"Oh dear."

She expects him to be fuming, but he is sickeningly quiet. "What?"

"We don't have as much time as I'd like," he mutters.

"To do what?"

"About the miscarriage, you said it was fairly common for women to lose babies that way."

"Yes."

"Well, we can try again, can't we?"

"I don't want to try again. I want to go now," she says simply, standing up again and trying to brush past him. He moves to block the door, covering her only chance of escape.

"I thought you wanted to talk about the letter?"

"I'm not feeling well. We can talk about it some other time. Now, please, I want to go home," she tries to convince him into letting her go.

"Come on, Morgana. It won't take a minute. Hunith will be here soon, we need to make the most of the time we have left," he says with a coaxing smile. He takes her hand and leads her out of the living room and into the dining room.

"What are we doing here?"

* "No-one will see us back here," he takes her shoulders and kisses her gently, then guides her so that he back comes into contact with the wall.

"You can't do this. The doctor said I have to wait at least 3 months before doing this, otherwise-"

"I won't hurt you."

"But-"

"Shh."

He starts kissing her again, sliding his hands under her t-shirt and letting them roam over her back. She should be repulsed, kicking and biting at him, anything she can do to get him to stop, but she isn't. Everything is so compelling, she hasn't felt him touch her like this in such a long time.

"Stop," she manages to get out as he starts playing with the button on her jeans.

Thud.

There is a blonde woman, pounding frantically on the window outside.

"Ignore her."

"But... I don't want to do this."

"It won't take long, I promise. Just keep quiet and then no-one can disturb us. You don't want Merlin to find out about this, do you?"

Thud. Thud. Thud.

The woman is still there. She is crying, trying to shout something to her through the glass.

"I told you to ignore her."

"And I told you to stop."

The thudding has stopped and there is a loud bang that makes both of them jump.

"Get off of her." The woman is inside the house now. She must have kicked the door down.

Alvarr pulls away from her unexpectedly and Morgana falls to the floor, curling herself up into a ball.

"Or what?" He laughs, turning to face the woman who seems to smirk at this, despite her tears.

There is a loud, clanging sound that resonates through the entire house. She peeps up over her knees, to find Hunith with a frying pan and Alvarr on the floor. The blonde woman grabs for her arm and drags her out of the house and through the kicked down kitchen door.

I guess I'm the most hated author of the week, then? :(

I don't really have much to say about this chapter, only that it took a darker turn then I was really expecting myself.

Anywho, please find some time to review and tell me your thoughts – what you liked and what you didn't like. That would be very helpful!

Thank you all for reviewing the last chapter and I hope this one was okay.

Thank you for reading!