I started this WAAAAYYYYY back last month, on my actual birthday. But then I slacked off and forgot about it. I had planned to make it this huge chat. Then, like 15 minutes ago, I found it again, and planned to finish it. And then I got bored. So here's your miniscule chapter!

BUZZ…BUZZ…BUZZ…BUZZ…BUZZ…BUZZ…

My hand reached out for whatever was making that noise. Smack! My hand hit the cool surface of my iPhone 4 and I unlocked it, shielding my eyes from the bright light.

Kim! Get on chat! Pweeaaaaassssseeeee! – Jerry

I groaned and chucked my phone behind me. Not hard enough that it would fall off of the bed, but hard enough to ensure it was away from me. I couldn't have dozed for more than five minutes before my phone went off again. UGH!

Kim! Hurry up! It's an emergency! – Jerry

I sighed. Knowing Jerry his emergency is probably that Pepito peed the bed again or something. I swear, if this isn't important I am going to kill him.

I sat up and unsteadily moved forward through the black, bumping into multiple unidentified objects on the way. Finally, I made it to my pink rolly-chair and plopped down. I shook the mouse on my computer a few times until the screen popped up. Squinting for a few minutes until I could fix the brightness, I logged onto chat.

Kim A. Crawford: I'm here. What's your big emergency?

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: KIM! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Kim A. Crawford: YOU WOKE ME UP AT FOUR IN THE MORNING FOR THAT?!

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Don't say thanks. Just because I remembered your birthday. Jeez.

Kim A. Crawford: Jerry?

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Yeah?

Kim A. Crawford: I. Am. Going. To. Kill. You.

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: D:

JackarateB is online

Kim A. Crawford: Jack? What are you doing here?

JackarateB: Jerry told me you were going to physically harm him.

Kim A. Crawford: Well… I wasn't really gonna kill him. Just kick him where the sun don't shine.

JackarateB: Really? And that's any better?

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Yeah Kim! Bodily harm? I was just trying to be a good friend and remember your birthday!

Milton David Krupnick is online

Milton David Krupnick: Why am I here Jerry?

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Kim's trying to cause me bodily harm!

Milton David Krupnick: And this matters to me because?

JackarateB: Jerry, did you text him too?You need to quit texting people!

Kim A. Crawford: Yeah, believe me. People don't enjoy being woken up at FOUR IN THE MORNING!

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Well I'm SORRY! I WAS JUST TRYING TO BE A GOOD FRIEND!

Kim A. Crawford: Well you obviously DON'T THINK THINGS THROUGH!

JackarateB: QUIT IT! Both of you! Just stop! We're all tired! We need to stop! Now, Jerry, explain yourself.

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: What do you mean? What are we talking about?

Kim A. Crawford: Ugh. This is hopeless. I'm going to bed.

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: No Kim! STAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!11!11111! D:

Kim A. Crawford: Even more incentive for me to leave. UH-GOOOOOODDDDD NIGHTTTTT!

Kim A. Crawford signed out at 4:13

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Mamacita sure knows how to make a good exit!

Milton David Krupnick: I'm with you on that.

JackarateB: So… What now…

Milton David Krupnick: Welp, I'm off to bed! If you need me, I'm only a text away! MILTONATOR OUT!

Milton David Krupnick signed out at 4:17

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Miltonator? Ha! Jack, do you think that would be good blackmail?

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Jack?

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Where are you buddy?

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: SOLE-BRO!? WHERE ARE YA DUDE?! I FEEL SO LONELY!

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: YOU HAD MY HEART INSIDE, OF YOUR HAND! AND YOU PLAYED IT, YOU PLAYED IT, YOU PLAYED IT!

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: TO THE BEAT!

JackarateB signed out at 4:24

The Swag Sexy Beast Jerry: Aw, really?

Stupid, stupid Jerry. There are actually a few boys who could be exact twins to him in my gym class. (They say WHOOH when they win, act like him, the whole shebang!) Anyway, my niece is crying! Bye!