Author's note: I didn't know I was born at the same date as Jensen Ackles :) And now also little one Isabella Rose Sheppard :) So, happy birthday, all of you, born at March 1! It is a wonderful day for update :)
10.13.2015, Thursday (And ... Well, you get it!)
Mercy, Smith County, Kansas
When he turned in his chair at the café, Dean remembered almost everything that had happened in the past (at least for him) three days. His head ached like hell and the memories were pretty vague, but he was beginning to grasp the idea.
The day, Thursday, repeated.
The thought made him sick and he pressed his mouth to his hand and put all his will into suppressing spasms in his stomach. He must have been pale as a sheet and his hands were shaking, but at least now knew (as far as was possible in such a situation) what was happening.
The pounding in his head and the constant buzzing sound in his ears were irritating, but one thought had formed too clearly in his blurred mind - Mystery spot.
Now he understood how lucky he was, not remembering the time that he and Sam had spent experienced the same day on that damn place.
Sam.
God, what was his brother going through, seeing him die again and again, unable to do anything to stop it.
"Dean?" Castiel's hoarse voice startled him; it felt like he wasn't expecting to see the angel sitting across the table.
He stared absently at his hands.
Cas.
Damn it, Cas!
The hunter's look, widened by surprise, moved from his hands (Cas' blood sticking to his trembling fingers) on his friend's worried face.
The angel's head was slightly tilted to one side in an uncomprehending expression and his lips were gathered in a straight line. Castiel's blue eyes looked at him anxiously. Dean didn't remember ever been happier to see him. Well, maybe the moment when he found him in Purgatory, after months of searching.
He suppressed a surprisingly strong desire to stand up and pull him in his arms for a hug. Instead, his fingers dig into angel's forearm through layers of clothes and he smiled at the sense of reality the touch gave him.
"Is everything okay?" Cas asked.
"It's actually pretty far from okay," Dean said. "We need to talk."
"So I ... " Castiel still looked at him with disbelief after Dean had told him everything he remembered, including the experience as Sam had described it from the Mystery spot.
"Yeah." He nodded. "Three times."
"Well, that must have been unpleasant for you."
"For me?" The hunter almost choked on his coffee. "Cas, you died."
"Yes, but you're the one who remembers."
"Whatever you say." Dean had neither the strength nor the desire to argue. "At least now we have something to start with."
Cas nodded.
"So this creature, whatever it is, is using the strong link between the victims and is killing violently one of them while consuming the other's soul. Then turn back time and repeat. But for what purpose?"
"I only know one goddamn thing, who can warp the time in such way, and that is your asshole brother, Gabriel. But last time I checked him, he was quite dead."
"We can exclude him of the suspects," Castiel said grimly.
Dean cursed himself mentally for not thinking ahead when he offened the archangel. Nevertheless, he was Cas' brother, one of the few who had proved not been such a dick and died to protect them. And if it wasn't for him, they wouldn't know how to send Lucifer back into the Cage. Castiel never said anything, but Dean was sure it hurt him when they lost Gabe.
"Other option is we are dealing with a real trickster," the hunter wondered aloud. "But I'm not sure that these creeping things are strong enough to manipulate time."
"I'm quite sure they are not." Cas bent his head. "But you're wrong, there is another option."
"What?"
"An angel."
"You're kidding." Dean sighed wearily and rubbed his eyes with his hands. "As that Tamiel guy, the Grigori? You said he was the last."
"It is assumed that all were killed."
"Won't you feel it, if it's an angel?"
"Not necessarily. Not if he managed to hide. This requires great strength, but it's possible," Cas said. "But it also explains how he knew he must ward the house in order to kill me as a mortal."
Dean blinked, annoyed by the indifferent tone that the angel used to refer to his own death.
"Is it possible he knows you?" he asked, trying to shake the feeling.
Castiel sipped his coffee and nodded.
"It is very likely, indeed."
This was too much for Dean. The calmness with which the angel took the situation made him angry.
Maybe because he didn't remember or just he was trying to stay calm and this was his damn Angel-of-the-Lord mode. Dean wasn't sure, but as he looked at the impassive expression on his friend's face, he wanted to hit him.
Well, at least dying was certainly not new for both of them.
Dean wondered how many times he had witnessed his friend's death (except the last three, of course).
The first time he left him in Chuck's house to confront the archangel, in order to give him a chance to save Sam; Dean had thought that the angel had balls after all. That was when they discovered that he had been scattered into atoms. For a moment, in rememberence, something in his chest twitched in pain.
Then, when Cas carved the angel banishing sigil on his chest, even though the angel thought that he would fail. When they didn't know whether he is alive, Dean felt guilty that he was ready to surrender to Michael so easy, though everything Cas was sacrificed for him. And for a moment he wanted the angel to sit beside him in the car with his ridiculous hair and clueless expression, staring at him with his head slightly cocked sideways and his big blue puppy dog eyes.
Then again, when Lucifer tore him apart with the snap of his fingers, Dean was grateful that the angel gave him his five minutes with Sammy. That pain had clenched his chest for an endless moment. He had thought that they are all dead.
When he watched helplessly from the shore with how the bloody trench-coated figure was lost in the water, releasing on earth an ancient evil. Nevertheless, he was grieving his friend, he had felt his loss, painfully, and this time threatening to be permanent. And despite everything that Cas had done at this point, he would give anything to go back. Just to have a chance to fix things.
And then Cas had become human and was killed by a reaper. Stabbed with his own blade. In that moment when Dean was kneeling before his lifeless body, when he didn't feel pulse under his fingers, the realization hit him.
He wanted his friend back. Because things couldn't end like that. He had circled all night to find him. He had fought the reaper. He asked for help from the angel that possessed his brother. He had found Cas, but a few seconds too late.
A few seconds that cost him his life. And Dean was tired of losing people. And this was Cas. And this was all, as if that in itself was reason enough.
Thinking about all the times when he had lost Cas, or had thought he lost him, which in most cases was the same, Dean Winchester couldn't help but wonder when he would be run out of luck. Cas had a habit of always coming back. But sometime in the future, as considering their lifestyle, there was day that Cas would not come back.
The year of 2014 had come and gone, but Dean remembered the shots from that day. That half-destroyed building in Detroit in the future that never happened. He remembered, too, that he was the one who had sent Cas to his death, as it turned out that in fact he had done several times before.
As in this case, first at the warehouse, then into this house, Cas had stood without hesitation in the path of bullets to protect him.
"I'm sorry, Cas, but I do not share your calmness," his voice came out sharper than he intended. "Why aren't you worried?"
"Of course I am." Castiel raised eyebrows at the serious expression. "The damage on your soul will soon be irreversible, and this is something I cannot fix."
"Damn it, Cas! What part of the you-fucking-died situation didn't you understand?"
"My death is not the problem here, Dean," the angel tried to explain calmly, "It is more important to break the cycle. The creature, an angel or something else, feeds on pieces of your soul. Do you not know how serious the consequences are?"
"Yeah. I saw Amelia, remember?"
Dean regretted his words the instant they came out of his mouth. Although Cas was trying very hard not to show his emotions, when he mentioned the name of Claire's mother, a shadow passed over the angel's face. Cas blamed himself for what happened and he would never forgive himself, Dean realized.
"I'm sorry," the hunter muttered half-heartedly and then changed the subject. "So, if it's an angel, where you think we can find the bastard?"
"He needs to be close to his victims," Cas said slowly, "It could be anyone."
Dean looked nervously around, studying the faces of visitors in the small cafe, as he had been doing the last three days. Then something suddenly popped into his mind.
"Do you think... I mean... when you died, you think Raphael, Crowley and Mr. Carmichael had been an illusion? Could it have been the angel?"
Cas thought for a moment and nodded.
"Yes. What was the expression, his game - his rules? Grigori is almost as strong as an archangel. Moreover, this one feeds on souls, it makes him even stronger. For him it would not be a problem to get into your memories and pull images from there. He can also bend our perceptions."
"Still, I don't understand two things," Dean pondered. "First, why pairs? And why is killing them when he can trap them in illusion forever? Why does he go through so much trouble? And second, what the hell he wants from us?"
"I guess revenge," Cas said carefully "There is every reason to believe that the killer has breached his pattern especially for us. But this could be a good thing."
Dean rubbed his tired eyes. Again.
"Yeah? Why is that?"
"We know where the creature will be the next time I die."
"What?" Dean couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You suggesting what I think?
Cas nodded.
"No, no." The hunter shook his head. "I'm not gonna use you as a bait!"
"Dean, this is our only chance to stop him. Even more so, I'm not the bait. We both are."
Dean frowned. He didn't like the plan. Moreover, they didn't know anything about this creature. Their whole strategy rested on assumptions.
Well, actually he and Sam had staked their lives for less.
"Dean, one more thing..." Castiel continued with uncertainty in his voice.
"What?"
"If things go wrong..." The angel looked at him with his big blue eyes, "just let him kill me and try to remember as much as possible."
Dean felt like he was about to throw up.
