I. Am. SORRY. I was distracted by shiny things. For a very long time. Here is a chapter that will hopefully calm your undoubtedly outraged minds.

-o-

Gluttony was nearly thrown off balance by the sheer force of the explosion of power that had ignited from Yachiru's place. A pillar of pink energy a towered over him. It dissipated quickly, and in the center of a deep crater stood Yachiru, a look of complete determination in her eyes. In her tiny hands was a battleax that was easily five times her size. It had a double blade, with one being decorated with an image of a demon running into battle and the other with an image of a tiger charging the opposite way of the demon. The shaft of the weapon was red like an inferno, and was just thin enough for Yachiru's hands to fit around, but thick enough to hold its own weight.

Gluttony stared in confusion at this. The little girl had a sword before, didn't she? Where did that battleax come from? Thinking about it made his head hurt. "Too hungry to think," he muttered to himself. "Need to eat… I'll eat you…" He lifted one huge, meaty hand and swung it down on the pink-haired little girl, smashing in the ground where she had been standing. He lifted his hand and stared at his stainless palm, then down at the spot where Yachiru's flattened remains should've been.

"Up here!" her voice shouted from above. Gluttony faced the source, only for Yachiru's battleax to be rammed into his face. It couldn't go deep enough to kill him, but it was enough to earn an ear-piercing cry of pain from the Sin. Yachiru yanked her weapon out of Gluttony's forehead and smirked as she began twirling it over her head. "What's wrong, fatty? Headache?"

Gluttony roared and tried to smash Yachiru yet again, but the girl leaped away in time for Gluttony to punch himself in the face, deepening his already excruciating wound. He shrieked in pain again and glared at the girl, who was now standing in the air above him with a playful grin on her face.

"You're annoying," he said in a dark tone. "Not worth the trouble of eating… I'll just kill you… be done with it…"

Yachiru frowned at that. "Are you underestimating me? I've killed plenty of Hollows before. I'm pretty sure I can take you down just like them."

"Hollows," Gluttony mumbled. "Hollows… tasty… Vasto Lordes are really good… especially when they're Arrancars… I like bitter taste…"

Yachiru actually sweat-dropped at that. "Vasto Lordes" sounded vaguely familiar to her. Some kind of super-powerful Hollow, she thought. And Arrancars were even tougher, right? If this big pile of fat had eaten something that powerful before, then he may still have something left to try and kill her with. She grinned at that thought. "Well, let's do it! Show me what you got!"

Gluttony growled as he moved to try and grab the girl, but she Flash Stepped away and slashed at his arm, leaving a gaping gash running down along the limb. She then Flash Stepped again and hacked at his back, creating yet another opening in his flesh. She kept up this strategy, her sheer speed being too much for the gargantuan Sin to keep up. She shredded him in over fifty places before something truly bizarre happened.

With a roar of pure rage and bloodlust, Gluttony was suddenly enveloped in a burst of black flames that knocked Yachiru away nearly twenty feet. She managed to stop herself in midair, but could only watch as the black flames slowly died down. Standing in Gluttony's place was… a big… blob of… lard? It was literally a gigantic pile of something that looked like lard. What the hell was she looking at?

Suddenly, the blob shot out thousands of little pellets of itself at her, which she only narrowly avoided with a Flash Step. The lard pellets struck a building that was behind her and tore the thing down in a matter of seconds. She looked back at the giant blob, which was shaking and jiggling now. It grew out long, gangly arms and a bulbous head with beady black eyes.

"Full power…" the blob said in a distorted version of Gluttony's voice. "Can't be cut… can't be hurt…"

Yachiru gripped the shaft of her zanpakuto. "We'll see about that!" She charged in with her blade ready and sliced the Sin's head clean in half. "Ha! Easy as pie!"

Her victory was short-lived. The blob's split head slowly moved to reconnect its two halves. A tendril shot out of its body faster than Yachiru could keep up with and swatted her away into the ground, where she skidded painfully until she finally came to a stop. She groaned as she lifted herself to face her opponent again. The Sin had transformed himself into a giant blob monster that she couldn't cut and, therefore, couldn't hurt. What now?

Gluttony's body made a revolting slurping sound as it slid toward her. Tendrils would occasionally shoot out of his gelatinous body and pull in random debris, like chunks of concrete or even flaming vehicles, and pull them into the main body… where they were burned away as if they had been dropped in acid. Not good.

"Hungry again…" Gluttony mumbled in frustration. "Guess I have to eat you… it'll still kill you… no broken promises…" Tendrils of that lard-like acid squirmed out of his body and shifted into the forms of numerous weapons, from swords and axes to maces and hammers. Each tendril slammed down at her, crushing everything in their path whenever she dodged. She hacked at every tendril with Akumatora, but they only grew back. It was practically hopeless.

As Yachiru flipped and jumped away from the Sin's devastating attacks, she tried desperately to think of some way to beat this guy. Kenny, she thought. What would you do?

-o-

He had no idea where he was. He was surrounded by infinite, endless blackness. He walked forward, as he had been for the past… how long has it been? It felt like hours. He had to get out of this dark place and help Yachiru, but how? Wherever he turned, wherever he looked, he found only more emptiness.

"Dammit," Kenpachi muttered under his breath. All he could do was keep walking and hope that he found some way out of here before something really bad happened.

"Kenpachi," said a woman's voice from within his mind. "You mustn't let dark thoughts blind you. They will only slow you down."

"You don't think I know that, Shugoshin?" he replied to his zanpakuto. "I can't find any way out of this hellhole. Where am I supposed to go, huh?"

"How should I know?" Shugoshin replied. She manifested into a metaphysical form that only Kenpachi could see, not that it mattered in this place. "Kenpachi, you need to find a way out of here. That Sin has to be destroyed. Yachiru won't be able to do it all by herself."

"And what do you suggest?" the captain asked, his one visible eye narrowing slightly. "It's not like I can just cut my way out of here."

Shugoshin sighed at the large man. "You have plenty of options, you know. Tell me, whenever you fight a strong enough opponent, what do you usually do to gain an edge?"

He stared at her for a moment, not really sure what she was getting at. But soon enough, a light bulb clicked on in his head, and he grinned. "I like the way you think."

"My thought process is more or less the same as yours," the zanpakuto spirit said as she faded away. "Now then, let's go give that fat bastard hell, shall we?"

-o-

Yachiru only narrowly managed to dodge one of Gluttony's many tentacles, which cleaved an entire building in half, sending it crashing into the ground. The pink-haired girl stood in the air far above the Sin, who looked up at her with a glare. She needed to hurry and find a way to beat him. This "fight" was taking a lot out of her. She doubted she'd last much longer against this guy. He practically invincible.

"Come down…" Gluttony spoke in that gargling voice. "Let me eat you…"

"Not until I figure out how to beat you!" Yachiru shouted back at him.

"Great strategy, runt," the voice of Akumatora said to her. "Tell the enemy that you're taking your time to find out how kill him. That'll work."

"Be quiet!" she shouted at her zanpakuto, waving her weapon around haphazardly. "I can't think with you talking in my head like that! It's creepy!"

Gluttony gave a look of slight confusion, but shrugged it off. Impatient, he launched out a swarm of tendrils to grab the girl. Yachiru couldn't react in time, and was wrapped in those slimy tendrils in almost an instant. She struggled against their grip, but couldn't break free. "Time to eat…" Gluttony said as he opened his mouth, his rancid breath hitting Yachiru almost as hard as his tentacles had hit the buildings and ground. She was pulled closer and closer to his gaping, repulsive maw. This could only be the end.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, a bright, golden light shown from within Gluttony's body, and his form began bubbling and started to spasm erratically. She was released by one of those spasms, and managed to Flash Step away in time to see Gluttony's entire upper body explode wide open. A tower of golden spirit energy shot out of him, and from this tower, Kenpachi Zaraki leaped out, his eye patch removed and his zanpakuto in the shikai form that he had obtained when he fought Ares back on Olympus, a shield with a rim made of serrated blades and an image of a human skull on its face. He had a huge, sadistic grin on his face.

"All right," he said with a tone of glee in his voice. "I'm back in action. You all right, Yachiru?" He got his answer in the form of a bone-crushing hug around his neck that nearly killed him.

"Kenny!" Yachiru exclaimed excitedly. "I thought you were killed! I had no idea what I would do if you were gone! How did you get out of his stomach? What did you do?"

Kenpachi managed to pry Yachiru off of his throat and set her down. "Simple. I just did what I do best." He grinned when he saw her huge battleax. "So, you got your shikai, too, eh?"

"Yep!" the little girl proclaimed proudly. "His name is Akumatora! He kinda reminds me of you, but not as nice."

The captain of Squad 11 chuckled at that. "Is that right? Well, make sure you tell him that I'll use him as butter knife if he ends up letting you get hurt." Yachiru giggled in response, and Kenpachi stood straight up, glaring at Gluttony's gelatinous body, which was gradually beginning to reform itself. He sneered at the Sin. "I get the feeling that neither of us are able to finish him off permanently. At least not without a hell of an attack that can blow him back to hell and gone."

"Then what do we do, Kenny?"

He narrowed his eyes in thought. He hated having to think while in a fight, but this was one of those rare exceptions. He turned back to Yachiru. "You got an attack to go with that shikai of yours?" Yachiru shook her head, and Kenpachi silently cursed under his breath. "Well, unless he has an attack that uses spirit energy, I won't be able to use my Koken'ninmira on him."

"He hasn't used any attacks like that. I don't think he can."

"Well, crap," Kenpachi muttered. This was only going to get tougher and tougher. Gluttony was almost finished rebuilding himself. They needed a plan, and they needed one soon. He hated planning.

Suddenly, Yachiru bounced up with an excited grin. "I have an idea!" she shouted right into Kenpachi's ear, nearly making him go deaf.

"Well, spit it out and stop screaming at me like that!" he shouted back. Yachiru didn't even flinch at that.

"What if I just hit your shield really, really hard? That might do something!"

The captain sweat-dropped at the suggestion. "Somehow, I really doubt that'll work out."

"C'mon, Kenny!" the little girl pleaded with best cutesy face. "It's gotta be better than not doing anything!"

Kenpachi hesitated to answer. He looked over at Gluttony's half-formed body. He had no better ideas in mind. He sighed in defeat and said, "Fine." He stood at the ready, his shield poised to block any blow. "Hit me as hard as you can! Don't hold back!"

Yachiru giggled. "I never hold back!" She hefted her battleax, and got into a good stance to hit Kenpachi's zanpakuto. She silently to whatever deities were watching that this would do something. She swung her weapon with all the strength she could muster, ramming the blade into the skull image on the shield's face.

The result was devastating.

Sound waves rocketed off the shield like a thousand invisible missiles, shattering windows and cracking concrete. Gluttony's gelatinous form had only just managed to become whole again, but when he was greeted by that ear-piercing sound, he shrieked in agony, trying to cover ears that he didn't have. Parts of his body even fizzled away into dust, falling off and cloaking the ground around him in black soot.

When the sound waves subsided, the two Soul Reapers stared with wide eyes at the damage that they had wrought, especially on the Sin. Kenpachi was quiet for several moments, then grinned victoriously.

"Looks like we just found his weakness," he said with a sadistic laugh. "Yachiru! Hit me again! Even harder this time!"

"You got it, Kenny!" the pink-haired girl replied giddily. She struck Kenpachi's zanpakuto with her own again, creating yet even more destructive sound waves.

Gluttony roared in pain as parts of his body dissolved. He couldn't maintain the focus he needed to hold his own form together. The sound was too loud, too powerful. All he could think about was how he wanted that sound to stop forever. His body quivered in agony, his form falling to pieces. It was pure suffering.

Yachiru only continued to strike Kenpachi's shield again and again. Her arms were beginning to get sore, and she could feel something warm and wet trickling out of her ears and from her hands. But she didn't dare to stop until Kenny gave the word. Which, eventually, he did.

"Yachiru, that's enough!" he exclaimed. The girl panted and fell on her rump, dropping her zanpakuto and examining her hands. They bleeding form the effort that she had gone through. Kenpachi knelt down in front of her and wiped something off of her ear. His fingers were covered in blood. Something in her ears must've busted open. "We need to get you to a healer. You won't be able to fight as well in your condition."

"But what about…?" She turned and faced Gluttony… who had reverted into his more humanlike form. His body was still dissipating, and he was groaning in pain the whole time. "Oh."

Gluttony struggled to pick himself up, but he couldn't muster the strength. His body was too heavy now. He looked up at the two Soul Reapers who had tormented him. The look in his eyes was one of pure terror. And yet…

"I die…" the Sin muttered as his head fell back to the ground. "So hungry… don't wanna… die… hungry…" And with that, his entire body fell into dust. Both Kenpachi and Yachiru stared at the pile of black sand that was once one of the Seven Sins.

Kenpachi sighed heavily and picked up Yachiru, setting her on his shoulder. He turned to leave, but before he vanished in a Flash Step to find the nearest medic, he looked back at the black soot. He chuckled quietly to himself.

Damn hell of a fight, he thought to himself as he vanished in a flicker of movement.

-o-

Aphrodite moaned quietly as she slowly opened her eyes, the sun beating down on her vision somewhat harshly. Her view was blurred, but clearing up gradually. She could make out somebody hunched over her. Eventually, her vision cleared enough for her to see who it was.

"Byakuya," she said quietly with a small, relieved smile on her face. Suddenly, her eyes widened. "Wait… Lust… where's Lust?"

"Gone," the Soul Reaper replied calmly. "You defeated her. You have nothing to fear."

The goddess sighed in relief. "Thank goodness. Was anyone hurt?"

"No. Everyone is safe."

"Good. Can I just lie here now? Preferably in your arms?"

"Of course," Byakuya answered. He wouldn't mind holding his goddess close for a little while.

"Excuse me," said a male voice. Byakuya turned and faced the speaker, the Sin called Pride. "Loathe as I am to interrupt this… touching moment, I am not known for my patience. I suggest that we find an ideal location to do battle, Byakuya Kuchiki."

Aphrodite glared at the Sin angrily. "I already hate that guy. Who is he?"

"An enemy," Byakuya replied simply. He picked up his wife and set her to rest against a wall. "The guards will be here momentarily to investigate what has happened here. I will go and fight that one." He glanced over at Pride before looking back to Aphrodite. "I want you to stay here."

"But…"

"I did not interfere in your battle with Lust. I ask that you do the same for me when I battle Pride. I swear upon my honor that I will not die. You have my solemn word."

The Goddess of Love and Beauty hung her head. "All right. Just… don't die. Our son needs his father as much as he needs his mother." Byakuya nodded and stood to confront Pride.

"Where shall we go, Soul Reaper?" the Sin asked.

"Follow me," the captain of Squad 6 replied. "I know a place where we are certain never to be interrupted." Pride nodded, and they both vanished in a flicker of movement.

Aphrodite looked at the spot where Byakuya had once been standing. You have my solemn word. That's what he said. She chuckled humorlessly to herself.

"That's what I'm afraid of," she said quietly. Right now, she could only hope that her husband would be strong enough to face one of the Seven Deadly Sins.