Disclaimer: I do not now or before and most likely not in the future, own Final Fantasy, Square Enix or any of the characters.
A/N: I'm sorry that it took me so long to get this update. This semester was kicking my butt. Sadly I've also had some serious family issues that needed to be taken care of and it is going to be an on-going situation for now.
There are song lyrics in italics at the ending part of this chapter and the song is "Savin' Me" by Nickelback. As I've said before, sometimes there is a song that just speaks to me and this one just seemed to fit perfectly with the way Zack feels at this point in the story. Also, the song was not part of the original when I sent it to my beta, I added the song after I got the revised chapter back from her. (I would love to hear back from you if putting the songs in with some of the chapters distracts or enhances what I've got written.)
I am working on another chapter of Nexus of Fate, then I'll get a chapter of Binary Fusion done, then I'll work on another chapter of Heart. Thanks for all your patience with me and my super slow updates.
Reviews, critiques, and flames are welcome. I absolutely love all reviews about the story as it gives me motivation, I utilize good constructive criticism to help my writing and I feed the flames to the fires of my imagination!
Thanks to my zombie-zapping beta SubZeroChimera!
"Don't care about what other people think of you. There will always be those people who want to see you fail because they can't succeed." –Unknown
To You I Give My Heart
Chapter 43
~New Nightmares and Old Dreams~
"Are you sure this is where you left him?" Cloud slowly raised her hand over her shoulder to the handle of the buster sword she carried as she surveyed the area calmly. Through the arousal of interest he felt at seeing her wield his sword, Zack felt a tickle of being watched and Genesis backed away slowly as a fire spell began to churn, starting as a small orb in his palm.
Spinning around, Zack scanned the area, expecting Hojo or maybe even Turks, but instead he spied a man crouched on a pile of rubble several yards away. The man looked like Harding, but was a pale representation with large fangs that his thin lips barely covered, small leathery wings stretching awkwardly from his back. The nude figure stared motionless, grotesque as he studied his grave's visitors with bottomless, pitch-colored eyes. The talons from his hands finished the look of a gargoyle statue atop the ruins of a building. Was that what Hojo was trying to turn him into as well?
Speaking through his teeth, Zack spoke to his companions quietly so he wouldn't cause the creature to startle, "Over there."
Glancing over his shoulder, Genesis sneered at the creature, "I suppose that death is merely a gateway for Hojo's work to come to life. My friend, the fates are cruel. There are no dreams, no honor remains." Looking at Zack, he narrowed his eyes, "I suppose you shouldn't die then?"
Cloud gasp at the sight of her former boyfriend and it occurred to Zack that her fear was not only for Harding, but for him too. It was the look of disgust and anxiety when she briefly glanced at Zack then back to Harding that gave it away.
Tilting his head, the creature's eyes blinked in slight recognition before returning to their black splendor of empty animalistic intentions. Adjusting its stance, it readied for an assault, its intentions to attack and feast obvious. Before that could happen, Zack stepped forward, "Harding?" Again blinking, the creature focused on the brunette, "You still in there?" Scraping chapped lips over the fangs, it appeared to try to speak. Giving a moment for the newly born creature to find the words it wanted to say, Zack stepped forward again.
With an urgent whisper, Cloud insisted, "Zack, stay back. That isn't Jacob anymore."
Whispering back to the blond, Zack urged her behind him, "No. I think he's still in there."
Genesis spoke loud enough for anyone to hear, "No… I think Hojo had his fun and now that man is now a monster."
At the mention of the Professor's name, the creature flinched, but stayed in place. The trepidation it showed before disappeared and was quickly replaced with a wild animal look.
Through his teeth, Zack spat, "Shut up Genesis."
"I think I have been quiet enough… for long enough." Allowing the fire that roiled in his palm to grow, the red haired former Soldier flipped his hand up and let the spell loose on Hojo's creation.
Leaping in the air and flapping his wings, Harding dodged the spell as it splashed along the concrete and burned fiercely. Turning his glare to the red-head, the former man stretched his arms out, in a stretch not unlike when waking from a dream, and roared in anger.
"Fuck!" Zack ducked back behind some debris with Cloud in tow and yelled at Genesis, "Can you go one flipping day without pissing someone off?!"
Turning his back to Zack and Cloud, blocking them from the impending attack, Genesis replied flatly, "What fun would that be?"
Standing up next to Genesis, Cloud pushed Zack backward, out of the path of her ex-beau. Genesis, taking the full brunt of the hit, grunted in pain as the sound of claws digging through leather and into skin was heard over the pant of anger. Cloud leapt over the duo and wrapped her arm around the neck of the creature. Wings flapped feverishly, but the weight of both humans kept him from taking to the air. Cloud's determined eyes found the pain-filled ones of the other as they sandwiched the man. Pulling a small dagger from his waistband, Genesis plunged the knife into the side of the man. A mewl of pain filled the air as fangs found flesh and again Genesis was bleeding from his shoulder.
Pulling with all her strength, Cloud wrenched back and dislodged the fangs from her friend and the talons left Genesis' arms and back to try to find purchase in the new game - the blond that lay out on the ground. Falling to his knees, Genesis quickly began another fire spell, but paused as Zack found himself between a slobbering creature, dripping blood from his mouth, and Cloud as she found her footing again.
Holding his hands up, Zack calmly asked, "Jacob?" Seeing the facial features soften for a moment, Zack swore he saw his friend behind those dark eyes. He wanted to believe that he was in there, that there wasn't a way to make a creature like this from a human. However the evidence stood in front of him. Was he also destined to become an undead thing, a monster to be controlled by a mad scientist? "Please, it's me, Zack." Pleading with him seemed futile. The creature's recognition morphed back into the thing it once was while still on the wall. Feeling Cloud rise next to him, he felt the sting of tears, but fought the urge, "This can't be it."
Reaching a hand closer, Zack brushed his fingers against the cold skin of his friend and cringed, the feeling of death. As quickly as Zack touched him, Harding just as quickly grabbed a hold of the friendly hand and screamed, "Miiine?!" Holding his hand, Zack willed his heart to not make it true. Tried to will his friend back to being human once again. Harding's chilled talons crunched down on Zack's knuckles, trying to feel the desperate emotions coming from his friend.
Before Zack could say anything else, another stab to the back once again drew the creature's attention to the red-head. While he was turned away from Zack and Cloud, the brunet dropped his head in sadness. His friend was lost to him, just as he would be lost to Cloud one day. Taking up the buster sword, and while he was distracted in staring down Genesis, Cloud swung the sword in an arc and lobbed off the fiend's head.
Watching as his friend's body collapsed to the ground, the head rolled a few feet away, Zack dared to point toward the red-head, "This is your fault!"
Ripping the sword from Cloud's clutches, and taking a fighting stance, Zack didn't let Cloud's pleading and pulling change his mind. Genesis pulled his rapier and took a similar stance, "So it is a dance to the death then?"
Circling one another, they exchanged words, "None of this would've happened if it weren't for you."
Stepping forward, daringly running his blade along the length of the buster sword, the scraping sound like screaming mice, Genesis added, "And how would you have acted any different in my place? Hmmm? Would you have done the honorable thing and killed yourself before allowing your friends to fall before you, even though you did not have the strength to pull that trigger."
"Better to pull the trigger than condemn your friends and innocents to a life of pain!" Leaping forward, the down swing was blocked easily by the rapier, but Zack put his extra weight behind the blow, making Genesis falter backward a step, but it was only a momentary lapse on the part of the former Commander.
"You mean the pain that was inflicted upon me as well?" Swiping from the left, Zack barely blocked his side from being sliced open, "Watching as not only my body, but the body of my best friend degraded and there was nothing I could do?" Switching sides, Genesis went on the offensive and began to wildly swing in arcs and blows that landed hard on the buster. Zack worked hard to keep upright and intact as Genesis seemed to find a rhythm in his movements, much like beautiful and deadly choreography.
It was noticeable to him that it had been too long since he'd held a sword and his fighting had become more primitive in his time with the Professor. His specialty was now in hand to hand. Daring death, he dropped the sword and blocked the flat part of the rapier's blade with the heel of his hand. Turning inward, he took hold of Genesis' wrist and brought it down hard on his knee, disarming him. Keeping a hold of his wrist, he twisted and brought the arm over his head and flipped him over his shoulder.
Not staying down for long, Genesis regained his footing and finished, "The pain that took over everything. The pain that left nothing of my humanity. The pain that didn't leave me a man, but a sniveling little boy wanting to die, but unable to."
Grasping the other's shoulders, they fought until Cloud finally broke them up, "Would you listen to yourselves?!"
Dusting his pants and leathers off, Genesis avoided eye contact with Zack as he began to nurse the wounds inflicted by Harding. Zack also brushed himself off as he glanced briefly at the red-head.
Cloud picked up the buster sword and holstered it on her back, "You two can have your little pissing contest later. Both of you have been through hell and both of you have come back from it so just stop fighting each other and concentrate on the goal of finding Hojo and getting rid of Jacob's body."
Glancing around and lifting a finger in the air, Zack tried, "Umm…"
"I don't want to hear it Zack! Just help me with-"
"What body?"
Genesis rolled his eyes and sheathed his rapier, "That is fantastic. Now we have a headless monster to hunt."
Scratching his head, Zack cleared his throat, "Umm, his head is gone too…"
Casting a cure on himself, Genesis spoke lowly, "So we have an immortal creature that Hojo has created that we must clean up before he eats the populace."
Taking up a strategic place between Cloud and Genesis as they walked back to the house, Zack clenched his jaw and spoke menacingly to his former commander, "This isn't over."
"I accept the challenge. My soul, corrupted by vengeance, hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey."
"Do you ever give that damn poem a rest?"
With a wry smile, Genesis simply quoted, "Ripples form on the water's surface. The wandering soul knows no rest."
Cloud's sigh was loud enough that it made Zack smile at the thought of the blond hearing the poem daily. Remembering her short temper, it gave him a reason to believe that Genesis got the same reaction from Angeal back before things went from bad to even worse. It was that little bit of life that seemed to give the former Commander reason to go on, a reason to ally himself with the blond and the special little girl that was waiting for them to return.
A few nights later, after Genesis and Aerith left, and Zack tucked Charlotte in for bed, he lay on his pallet next to Cloud's bed. Resting with his hands tucked behind his head, he stared at the ceiling and listened to the soft breathing of the woman above him as she fell into sleep. Waiting for the gentle dozing sounds that always made him smile when he teased her about how much she snored, he thought back over the week. Charlotte always found a spot next to him whether it be on the couch, in the kitchen or while he was reading a book to her and his bond to her deepened further. The feel of her tiny frame making contact with him made it possible to feel less perceived pain and more tranquility with the simple and essential touches.
Turning to his side, he lifted himself up to his elbow and tentatively peeked over the edge of the bed. Finding the blond on her side, her mouth slightly open as she breathed heavily in slumber, his eyes wandered to hers as they swiftly moved under her lids. With one of her hands tucked under the pillow, the other hand was free and her fingers twitched with her dream.
Prison gates won't open up for me
On these hands and knees I'm crawlin'
Oh, I reach for you, well I'm terrified of these four walls
These iron bars can't hold my soul
All I need is you,
Come please, I'm callin'
And Oh, I scream for you
Hurry, I'm fallin', I'm fallin'
Leaning forward, his nose rested on the side of the bed and he inhaled the scent of her. It was still as intoxicating as his memories allowed him to remember. The sweet memory of them naked under a waterfall deep in the forest after bathing invaded his mind. Forgetting for a moment that they'd been on the run, he let himself get lost in the memory and how he'd promised that he would bring her back to that beautiful spot once he found help for her.
Show me what it's like
To be the last one standing
And teach me wrong from right
And I'll show you what I can be
Now though, he sat on the floor and spied on her from over the edge of the bed.
Before he knew what he was doing, he reached up and stretched his hand to meet hers, desperately grasping at her fingers. He needed physical contact with her, reminiscent to when they were in captivity together.
Say it for me, say it to me
And I'll leave this life behind me
Say it if it's worth saving me
When her eyes opened, he stilled. Deep understanding between them passed wordlessly as she took his hand. Not moving, still peeking over the edge, his eyes teared up when she pulled his hand toward her lips. Laying a gentle kiss on one of his knuckles, her eyes found his as she kissed his hand once again.
His breathing went rigid. He wanted to join her on the bed as she seemed to invite him. He wanted so badly to curl up next to her, be comforted by her, but after all the things that he'd done, and had done to him while in captivity haunted him.
Not realizing he'd dropped his eyes to the blanket, her soft and insistent voice broke him from his thoughts, "Zack."
Heaven's gates won't open up for me
With these broken wings I'm fallin' and all I see is you
These city walls ain't got no love for me
I'm on the ledge of the eighteenth story
And Oh, I scream for you come please
I'm callin' and all I need from you,
Hurry, I'm fallin', I'm fallin'
Lifting his eyes again, a tear dripped down his cheek. Leaning his head on the side of the bed, he stared at her, waiting, but not knowing what kept him from speaking. Thinking back to what Harding had turned into made him apprehensive. He didn't know if he should stay with Cloud and Charlotte, he didn't want to hurt them.
Nuzzling his hand under her chin, she closed her eyes, trusting of his presence, and spoke in a whisper, "I'll always be here for you."
Tapping his thumb on her chin, she opened her eyes as he asked, "Even if I turn into a monster?"
Say it for me, say it to me
And I'll leave this life behind me
Say it if it's worth saving me
Dropping his hand, she leaned closer to him and whispered with a tense smile, "I'll buy the best monster food I can find, for you."
With trepidation, he revealed the rest of his face to softly lay his lips on hers. He tested his lax theory that Charlotte had been preparing him over the last week, helping him to overcome his aversion to touch. Just as he thought it would begin to hurt him, the feeling of her lips on his was quickly felt as it should - sweet and wholesome, the feeling of love that he needed to remember.
Hurry, I'm fallin'
And all I need is you
Come please, I'm callin'
And Oh, I scream for you
Hurry, I'm fallin', I'm fallin', I'm fallin'
She didn't pull on him. She didn't try to force any touch, she let him lead the way. Releasing her lips, he licked his own, thankful that the touch of her skin on his was not full of pain. Pulling her covers back, he climbed under them and curled up next to her and allowed her arms to wrap around him. Slowly he nestled his head under her chin as he reached around her waist with one hand. Her small frame was passive as she inhaled and reigned in her desire to squeeze him.
With his ear on her chest, he listened to her heart race. He fought with himself, as he wanted to say that he just didn't want to sleep on the floor like an animal anymore. He didn't want to be kept, he wanted to be, wanted to feel human again, but he only got out a simple question that was only compound to him as he slipped on some of the words, "Can I sleep h-here with you tonight?"
Say it for me, say it to me
And I'll leave this life behind me
Say it if it's worth saving me
With a lasting kiss on the top of his head, she stated easily, "Always and forever."
A/N 2: Thanks to everyone who reads, favorites, subscribes and/or reviews, I appreciate your time and I dedicate all of this to you. To quote another author, "Getting reviews makes me feel all warm and squishy."
Please send me your reviews if you want. It is really easy. Just click your arrow in the little box, write what you thought or felt about the chapter and then click right down there, just below the box. A little lower… a little to the right… yeah, right there! Click it! *grinning*
