What's up, guys? I've been a little busy lately, so I'm pretty sure this update took longer than usual to be posted. That happens with the start of summer, right? Summer. No school. Just about the greatest prize you could receive for surviving yet another year of hell, at least in my opinion. I mean, I would also accept a million dollars for all my troubles. That's what a year of school is worth, right?
I'll shut up now so you can read.
By the time the week is out, I've come to terms with the fact that mush makes up most of the diet down here. I've also learned that it's made of some sort of grain that's able to grow without basically any sunlight. Despite having accepted this, I still only eat the minimum needed to satisfy my hunger. I just can't bring my tastebuds to enjoy eating anymore. At least Isabel has finally stopped picking on my reluctance to eat their food, though.
I can't help but feel like a withering plant down here. Since the day Levi took me to the staircase, I haven't left the house. What would be the point? There's nowhere for me to go. But now it's been seven days since I've seen the sun, seven days since I last had a hearty meal in my stomach. Seven days since I've been able to bathe in a tub. Down here, I've been forced to settle for a sometimes private spongebath. I'm lucky if Isabel doesn't insist on using the same water bucket as me. It's demeaning. It's humiliating. It's an absolutely wretched existence. And I can't fight against it, because what else do I have? If I ever reach above ground again, what's even left for me there? The only one from home left is Easton, and if I saw him, I think I'd turn and run.
I really have become what Levi said. I'm a filthy stray.
A filthy stray who's starving, too. Stomach constricting, I pull myself out of bed and trudge into the front room. There, Farlan rushes to set a bowl of gruel on the table for me. It's the only thing I've seemed to come out for lately, so he's been quite adamant about serving me food when I emerge. Robotic, I lift a spoonful into my mouth.
Off to the side, Levi shuffles a deck of cards to deal to Farlan and Isabel. The brat eyes me cautiously, picking her teeth. When Levi sets her cards in front of her, she comments, "Princess's gotten skinnier, don't you think?"
"She would," Levi points out in a monotone. "You've seen how much she's eaten."
"Yeah, well, I like her better this way. She's not all plump like a pig."
A pig...now I'm a pig. Swallowing the mush in my mouth, I push the bowl away and stand. I'd wash the bowl, as per Levi's preference, but Farlan has forbidden me from throwing out unfinished food. So I just leave it and return to my room.
As I'm sinking back into the mattress, a knock at the door draws me back up into a sitting position. "What do you want?"
The door opens and shuts, Levi stepping into the room. "Isabel would have told you to instead invite the person in."
"Are you going to tell me to do that?"
"I don't care enough." He swipes a nearby shelf and studies his hand. "Not a speck of dust. Why haven't you cleaned anywhere except your room?"
"Why should I clean what I don't use?"
"You use the kitchen."
"And you clean it. Would you clean my room if I stopped?"
As I expected, he replies, "I'd throw you out."
"So I clean it. It's tiring." I turn my hands over in front of my eyes, taking in how red they've grown. They used to have such pretty color, and now look at them. I even think my right hand might be forming a callous. "I don't understand how you and the servants back home have done so much of it. It's awful."
"If it isn't done, this place will revert to a dump," Levi grimaces. "Unlike some people down here, I think you can understand my reluctance to have that happen."
I lower my hands, meeting his eyes. "What is it you want?" He wouldn't come if he hadn't a purpose. He hasn't stepped foot in here once since I've been here.
"Farlan wants me to drag you outside," he sighs. "Says you're my responsibility since I brought you here. Are you coming or not?"
"What would be the point?"
"Fine then." He opens the door to leave, then pauses in the doorway. After a bit of thought, he asks without looking back, "What if I could show you the sky?"
It takes me a moment to understand, but even then it doesn't quite process. "...What?"
"Would you come?"
"...yes."
"Then clean yourself up and come out in under five minutes. If you take even a second longer, we're not going." He slams the door shut behind him. I stare at the closed door, then jolt into action. The fingers of one of my hands yank through the knots in my hair as my other hand sloppily reaches for a clean change of clothes. Then I pause, stuck. What do I do about my feet? Levi made me get rid of the ones I had, but all he's provided me with are stiff, rigid boxes he passes off as shoes. They hardly even resemble men's shoes, and they're ripped at half of the seams. I could just go barefoot, but the ground down here is a far cry from the soft grass back home. The idea of rocks digging into my feet also isn't a pleasant thought.
After a minute of debate, I reluctantly slip my feet into the worn shoes and make for the door. When I burst out, Isabel matches my abrupt appearance with sudden laughter that startles me.
"You look terrible!"
"I look a hell of a lot better than you do," I snarl. Yes, I snarl. My throat clenches at the realization of how feral I've begun to turn.
"Ooo," Isabel snickers, "and her catty tongue is back, too!"
"Let's go." Levi's voice draws my eyes to him. He stands by the open front door, tightening that weird police gear of his around his body. After a second of staring I open my mouth to ask about it, why he wears it half the time he goes out, when he turns and walks out the door. I skip into a rush to follow, my hand reflexively going down to grab a heavy skirt that isn't there. The lack of material gives me a moment's pause, but I quickly shake it off and head after him.
The world outside the house hasn't changed since I last saw. The people still beg, the dogs still howl, the better off people still ignore them all. It's stagnant. Like the world doesn't move without the sun. Where Levi leads me, though, there are no people. He stops without warning when we're alone in an alleyway and pivots to face me, staring.
"What?" I blink. "What're you doing? Is there something on my face?"
With a scowl and a huff, he reaches out to me. I instantly move away, to which he growls, "Do you want to see the sky or not?"
"I do! But what are you doing?"
"Stop asking questions or we'll go back to the house and you can forget about seeing the blue sky."
Gulping, I flinch when he sweeps me into his arms, both uncomfortable with the touch and surprised with how easy it seems to be for him. Sure, I've probably lost a little weight over the past week, but he looks too skinny to be so strong.
Nervous, I grumble, "What does picking me up have to do with anything?"
He doesn't answer. Then a pop and a whirring makes me jump. Some sort of spear shoots out from the gear hooked onto his thighs and digs itself into the top of a nearby building, fragmented rocks falling like crumbs from around it. I raise an eyebrow at him, but he doesn't even look at me.
Suddenly we're yanked upwards, and another spear spikes out to grab onto another building. I cling to Levi as we're pulled higher and higher off the ground, my breaths coming quicker. What is this? What're we doing? What if he drops me?
And then it stops, as quick as it had started, and we're back on the ground. Trembling, I look down to find we've stopped on a ledge above the town. The view is exactly like the one I saw when I first climbed down into this hellhole, if I had come down on the opposite side of the town.
Then it occurs to me. "Hey!" I tug on Levi's shirt, to which he drops me in response. I thud to the ground with grunt, cringing, then pulling myself upright. Glaring at the man, I continue, "If you're able to do this, can't you take me above ground? The hole I fell down, you could get out of it with this!" And over the walls of the garden on the surface, too! I could be free!
"The ground around openings is too soft to anchor to," is all he says. Then he starts walking again. As much as I hate to say it, I've pretty much grown used to the way he treats me. That isn't to say I no longer despise it. I just have learned to bite my tongue about it, because whatever I say, he throws right back in my face. And if there's one thing I detest with all my heart, it's being made a fool of.
Begrudgingly, I rise to my feet and follow him. After tripping over a few large, jutted rocks, I eventually round the corner he turns. And then I halt.
The earth has somehow over time formed a large, open dome. At the top, a gaping round hole is carved out to reveal the wide open sky above it. The light streaming in at first causes me to flinch back, but as my eyes adjust to the sunbeams, I become unable to tear my eyes away. Directly under the opening, a pond smaller than the one I fell in a week ago has formed. While the edges are opaque with mud and algae, the center is as clear as the water I saw before. And this time there aren't any fish to repulse me. And as if it needed anything more to be spectacular in this desolate underground, wild daisies sprout about here and there in patches, thriving on the nutrients of the sun.
My feet inch me gradually closer to the center of the opening, only stopping when my toes meet water. Even then, I lean out until I very nearly lose my balance, but I don't care. After brooding and sulking and pitying myself for so long, the sky that had once felt so mundane to me has now transformed into something incredible. A part of me aches to touch it, but I retract my hand when I realize I've stretched my fingers out to do so. Of course I can't touch it! The sky itself is not a thing! But even knowing this, I can't help but wish gravity would momentarily reverse so I could fall into that expansive blue.
Then I realize my eyes have begun to burn, and struggle to hold in the tears. I'm...crying? Why? Why now, after I've been unable to cry no matter how much I longed to since the day Levi took me to the stairs?
"If you've come back to life, it would be nice if you'd stop being a deadweight around the house," Levi comments. I blink, then turn my head, remembering he's here. He sits between two patches of daisies, reclined comfortably as if to sunbathe despite the lack of light where he's sitting.
"Um…" Words...what were those again?
"Stop being selfish and clean somewhere other than your own room."
Lacking my normal defensive tone, I remind him, "I told you, I wouldn't be your maid."
"And I told you I'd kick you out."
"...We'll see." Somehow, my temper has drained from me. I know I'd normally be adamantly against the notion of manual labor for someone other than myself, but for some reason I can't help but feel anything but light right now. Even the prospect of scrubbing at the floor like a peasant doesn't seem so bad.
Well….at least not as bad as it would have sounded had he demanded me to do it yesterday.
Okay, here's how I feel. I'm a little scared she mellowed to suddenly. What about you guys? Do you feel that? Maybe it's just because she's been down in the dumps (pun maybe intended) for the past week, but she seems to lack her bite this chapter. Do you agree? Is it a bad thing? Maybe I'm just overthinking things. I tend to do that a lot. Well, whatever. So, I think I'll pose the question again next chapter, of whether or not this story is worth continuing. Honestly, I'm torn as to whether you guys like it or not, but you've still got another chapter to decide before I make my final decision. I anticipate hearing your thoughts.
Till then, Kisses from SnowyNeko! :3 MEOW!
P.S. It kinda feels like I ended this afternote on a negative note, so sorry about that.
